girls dont like skinny guys

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Replies

  • RekindledRose
    RekindledRose Posts: 523 Member
    Must be different around where I'm from because just about all girls I know have told me or my friend that they
    Wouldn't date me because I'm too skinny. Maybe in the wrong part of the country

    Well, if they're telling you it's your body type that's keeping them from dating you, then they're either not worth dating or they're trying to nicely turn you down without hurting your feelings.

    It's important to get healthy because it's what you want to do, not in hopes that girls will decide to date you.

    Besides, if you're hoping to eventually marry someone then this is the best thing I've heard from someone else: "If they don't care about you when you're at your worst then they don't deserve you at your best."

    Good luck.
  • BusyRaeNOTBusty
    BusyRaeNOTBusty Posts: 7,166 Member
    Find a girl who will date you for your personality.


    And yes, lift some weights.
  • jsdouglas26
    jsdouglas26 Posts: 30
    Find a girl who will date you for your personality.


    And yes, lift some weights.
    lol thanks
  • metacognition
    metacognition Posts: 626 Member
    "Just about all girls I know have told me or my friend that they
    Wouldn't date me because I'm too skinny."

    That's very strange. If you don't look like Christian Bale in the Machinist, I don't believe a skinny frame would hold you back from girls. Do you ask out women who are on the heavier or curvier side? They may be insecure about having a thin boyfriend, or weighing more than you.
  • Cherie7575
    Cherie7575 Posts: 233
    I’ve dated a woman that said the veins in my arms were disgusting, and i've had the total opposite.

    But hey, I’ve been on this earth for 29 years, women – still can confuse the hell out of me =) Do what you want for your reasons, the rest will come. If your happy, and confident with yourself, you will get the women of your dreams. All the best in your search and the gym, if you want any mass building help feel free to add me =)

    So uhh, Ive always sorta found those arm veins sexy for some reason... :P
  • MrsWonderland
    MrsWonderland Posts: 107 Member
    The most attractive people are the ones that accept themselves as they are, but strive to improves themselves, physically, mentally and emotionnaly, on a daily basis. If you are not happy with your body, this is what you're projecting to the ladies. Concentrate on the positive aspects of yourself, and work on the ones you like less. And the idea of a good personal trainer is right on! Remember...different strokes for different folks...tall, short, skinny, round...you can't generalize on what people like.

    :drinker:
  • glacier24
    glacier24 Posts: 3
    I don't go for skinny guys cause I'm afraid I might accidentally crush him or something like that....
  • kenhelms17720
    kenhelms17720 Posts: 62
    Edit- Didn't see this thread had already corrected the guy on the Basal rate.

    Your best bet like others have said though is to get a trainer atleast for a couple of months. This is mainly so that the trainer can spot and critique your form while weight training. He will also be able to do a body fat count, etc.
  • Cheval13
    Cheval13 Posts: 350 Member
    I want a guy that can run with me, and not have rolls of fat on him, but if they are lean with muscle, that's most attractive to me. Everyone is different though...
  • pinkraynedropjacki
    pinkraynedropjacki Posts: 3,027 Member
    Actually my 'type' till I met my husband was skinny guys. I love em. My son is a skinny guy & gets heaps of girls. Women who say you are 2 skinny are just insecure *****es.
  • MichelleLaree13
    MichelleLaree13 Posts: 865 Member
    I think it really just depends on the person. I tend to date skinnier guys. My fiance is 6 foot and about 155 lbs. I am open to more muscle but dont like the muscle bound look or fat/bulky look.
  • Moosycakes
    Moosycakes Posts: 258 Member
    My boyfriend is a skinny guy, and I love him so much <3

    And I think he's super sexy... I don't really go for muscles to be honest. So bulky :P
  • jimmmer
    jimmmer Posts: 3,515 Member
    Wanting to have a certain body type because then statistically more girls will find you more attractive is, to put it politely, insane. If you want to put on muscle because YOU want to be more muscular, that is a goal I can get behind. Trust me, the basic insecurity you feel about yourself (and that is encoded in your question) is what members of the opposite sex pick up on. People say they like all kinds of things when you ask them, but what goes a long way is being happy with yourself and the confidence that that radiates. The right person, will click on this when you meet them if your attitude is right.

    You need to be switched on to being "more" you, not trying to morph yourself into someone else that you think that people you haven't met yet may like. That way, when you do make meaningful contact with another human being, at least they are not latching onto to something as shallow as the circumference of your bicep! If you (god forbid) sustain an injury that puts you out of training for a while and your body reverts back to its former state, what are all these people who love you for your body type going to do?

    If that sounds like tough love, it is! It's the an analogue of the situation where girls feel the need to be skinny because magazines portray their role models that way. It's time we all grew up, took a step back, and stopped worrying what other people think! There's too much pressure to conform to something that's an illusion cooked up by some knob-end in Advertising (who by the way probably snorts too much coke and would have a heart attack if he tackled the stairs too vigorously!).
  • JLand918
    JLand918 Posts: 156
    I just had to disagree with the title overall I almost never see "hot" women with fat or not so skinny guys so this statement itself is totally false.
  • Jacwhite22
    Jacwhite22 Posts: 7,010 Member
    Hi I'm new here today. My goal is to add muscle to my frame. Currently I'm at 130 lbs Hoping to get to around 150 or so. I don't look that thin in my profile pic, think I may have zoomed in too much, but anyway I have trouble getting dates because most girls say I'm way to skinny that I need some muscle so that's why I'm here. I joined a gym last week , would it be more beneficial to get a personal trainer. Do most girls go for bigger guys?

    I'm not sure if your serious......From your picture....unless you are 4'0" I have a hard time buying 130.
  • pollyineedtobeskinny
    pollyineedtobeskinny Posts: 362
    my boyfriend is quite skinny but not really skinny.. i don't go for people with muscle to be honest, but if they had the best personality then ofcourse i am not going to complain. my boyfriend is skinny natural and i wouldn't change him for the world... i'm a bit bigger than him, i hate that but he loves me anyway.. :-)

    it's not about falling in love with someones body
  • jayche
    jayche Posts: 1,128 Member
    I've gotten a lot more attention after building a decent physique than I did being skinny. Good luck to you!
  • martintanz
    martintanz Posts: 280
    Lots of good advice so far. I have never been skinny, or underweight, but I have been in shape, out of shape, normal weight (but on the heavy side of normal) and obese.

    Putting on a few lbs of muscle (not sure about 20 lbs, but with effort you should be able to pack on a few lbs) will make a difference at the margin. Let me explain. Let us say that out of 10 available women, 2 would probably find you attractive as you stand today, 5 would not find you attractive under any circumstances, and 2 or 3 are persuadable.

    Presenting yourself as a bit more fit might win over 1 or 2 of the persuadables, other things being equal. That being said, the same could be said for wearing nicer shoes, driving a nicer car, having a circle of more interesting friends, or presenting yourself as more funny, or intelligent.

    So go ahead and improve your physique. Any reasonably healthy young man can do it. With effort, you can make noticeable improvements to your physique within 6 months to a year, which is somewhat more difficult than wearing nicer clothes or driving a nicer car (all you need is a healthy bank account for that), and somewhat easier than improving your personality (which might take years of effort and might not work anyway).
  • martintanz
    martintanz Posts: 280
    If you are finding almost every woman you approach just isn't interested, you might be approaching those who would not find you attacttive under any circumstances. Alternately, if you are getting first dates, but few second and third dates, it isn't your physique, but something you are doing that is turning them off. That isn't necesarily an immutable personality disorder. You just might be nervous, or maybe need a dating coach to walk you through a dating game plan.

    Full disclosure. I am married now but when I was in my early 20s, I went through a depressing pattern with women that had nothing to do with my weight, as I ran into the same problem at 190 lbs as I did at 240 lbs. Chris Rock called it "stuck in the friend zone." Women would adopt me as a sort of older brother figure and just wouldn't see me as a possible romantic partner. I eventually figured it out. I had the ridiculous idea that I should try to become friends with women first, then make my move. It was the exact opposite of what I needed to do, which was to make my move first, and if it worked out, friendship would come after the romance.
  • anewton23
    anewton23 Posts: 25
    6'1" 130 is not healthy, I would focus on getting healthy. Your arms and waist look tiny so weight training might do you good. I'm 5'6" 135 and a healthy weight. Shooting for 120
  • jsdouglas26
    jsdouglas26 Posts: 30
    6'1" 130 is not healthy, I would focus on getting healthy. Your arms and waist look tiny so weight training might do you good. I'm 5'6" 135 and a healthy weight. Shooting for 120
    I'm doing it more for myself than anything, I don't feel good looking too thin. Right now I feel insecure and weak looking around other guys.
  • anewton23
    anewton23 Posts: 25
    6'1" 130 is not healthy, I would focus on getting healthy. Your arms and waist look tiny so weight training might do you good. I'm 5'6" 135 and a healthy weight. Shooting for 120
    I'm doing it more for myself than anything, I don't feel good looking too thin. Right now I feel insecure and weak looking around other guys.
    my boyfriend is the same, he says he feels little around other guys. He has been trying to gain weight for a while
  • chrissyhy
    chrissyhy Posts: 32
    6'1" 130 is not healthy, I would focus on getting healthy. Your arms and waist look tiny so weight training might do you good. I'm 5'6" 135 and a healthy weight. Shooting for 120
    I'm doing it more for myself than anything, I don't feel good looking too thin. Right now I feel insecure and weak looking around other guys.

    Don't let it get you down. First off, though cliche here we go, its not about rather or not you have a six pac abs or not? However, it would be good to add some muscles to your body as it would gift your more strength and endurance. I know someone who feels the same as you so don't let it get you down;) Good luck.
  • jsdouglas26
    jsdouglas26 Posts: 30
    6'1" 130 is not healthy, I would focus on getting healthy. Your arms and waist look tiny so weight training might do you good. I'm 5'6" 135 and a healthy weight. Shooting for 120
    I'm doing it more for myself than anything, I don't feel good looking too thin. Right now I feel insecure and weak looking around other guys.

    Don't let it get you down. First off, though cliche here we go, its not about rather or not you have a six pac abs or not? However, it would be good to add some muscles to your body as it would gift your more strength and endurance. I know someone who feels the same as you so don't let it get you down;) Good luck.
    thank you
  • suzanzale
    suzanzale Posts: 14 Member
    Just for the record, I cannot abide fat guys! Too skinnny is way better than too many chins and fat rolls!
  • TheRealParisLove
    TheRealParisLove Posts: 1,907 Member
    Your photo doesn't look like someone who is 6'1" and 130. That is scary skinny, like a junkie or someone dying of aids kind of skinny.

    Your photo is obviously that of a healthy man of an average build.

    Are you sure of your measurements?
  • ironanimal
    ironanimal Posts: 5,922 Member
    Just for the record, I cannot abide fat guys! Too skinnny is way better than too many chins and fat rolls!
    Aren't you a peach.
  • LizardQueen4PointOh
    LizardQueen4PointOh Posts: 245 Member
    I am attracted to humorous men, intelligent men, men with DIY skills, and I can find something physically attractive about just about every man. Until my husband, I had never dated anyone obese. We've been married three years now and I've never been happier. I wish he would make healthier choices and join me on my journey to healthier living, but I've learned I can't be the one to make him do it.

    Anyhoo, I digress. If gaining some muscle mass will make YOU feel better - do it. When the right woman comes along, she will love you for what's inside (the outside should just be the icing on the already awesome cake).
  • TheRealParisLove
    TheRealParisLove Posts: 1,907 Member
    I just want to add, that my husband is 6'1" tall and about 180 lbs. He wears a 40L coat and 30-31 waist on his pants. He is quite slender and lean.

    At 130 his cheeks would be sunken and he would look like a walking skeleton. I just don't think the photo attached to the OP's profile is accurate. Something just isn't right about this topic.
  • anewton23
    anewton23 Posts: 25
    I just want to add, that my husband is 6'1" tall and about 180 lbs. He wears a 40L coat and 30-31 waist on his pants. He is quite slender and lean.

    At 130 his cheeks would be sunken and he would look like a walking skeleton. I just don't think the photo attached to the OP's profile is accurate. Something just isn't right about this topic.
    I don't know I thought he looked about that weight. My boyfriend is 5'10 120 or so and they look similar. His clothes are baggy though so maybe

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