The most polite insult you've recieved? redone

Maidofmer
Maidofmer Posts: 908 Member
I seen that someone posted something like this 4-5 months ago, and it made me laugh. So, what's the most polite insult you've received?

For me, you carry your weight well. My mother in law keeps getting me clothes, even though I've asked her not to cause I get depressed about it, "These are too big for me, but they'll fit you."

and, even if a guy is trying to be polite, this happened last week at work. "Excuse me Ma'am." Do I look like I am old enough to be called Ma'am?!

few of mine, what's yours?
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Replies

  • gel91
    gel91 Posts: 309
    Your starting to look like other people do now!


    Err yeah I know I was heavy but really, a different kind of human?!

    He meant It well, I just laughed when everyone else's jaws dropped open. First time he had seen me in a dress in years. He still apologises for it now!
  • Maidofmer
    Maidofmer Posts: 908 Member
    he should! my jaw dropped too lol
  • gel91
    gel91 Posts: 309
    If it was anyone else I would of be fuming, but luckily I know him very well & he always does this, alot! (Not with me I'm
    Happy to say!) His brain doesn't register what his mouth is about to say!
  • Maidofmer
    Maidofmer Posts: 908 Member
    haha you should have said, and with a little work, you'd look less like an *kitten*
  • gel91
    gel91 Posts: 309
    Haha, ill remember that just incase he or anyone else is stupid enough to do it again!
  • ladybird1771
    ladybird1771 Posts: 99 Member
    From a teacher YEARS ago, after I won the 100 metre race...
    *Looks me up and down* "Funny, you don't LOOK like a runner."
  • Maidofmer
    Maidofmer Posts: 908 Member
    haha . another one I thought of that my step dad used to joke with.What kind of shampoo do people with no neck buy? head and shoulders.
  • nickyfm
    nickyfm Posts: 1,214 Member
    "Oh stop. You haven't put on THAT MUCH weight."

    Stop it, you charmer you.
  • Lone_Wolf70
    Lone_Wolf70 Posts: 2,820 Member
    I think you would be great on the biggest loser
  • when i tried on my bridesmaid dress for the first time my dad said "wow it makes your head look small!"
  • The cab driver once asked me "How many kids do you have?" Err I'm still single without a child, do I look like I have kids? :grumble:
  • gym_king_carlie
    gym_king_carlie Posts: 528 Member
    Mine would be ''you look like that moviestar'' been all giddy and happy at that compliment it follows with a ''yeah that guy from superbad, Jonah Hill'' and my smile turns upside down lol....(dont get compared to him no more but It was a regular thing a year or 2 ago lol)
  • mnmoon
    mnmoon Posts: 22 Member
    I moved to the south from the midwest about a year ago. Shortly after getting here, I realized "Bless your heart" is not something that people say when they are being nice here. Or, the other one was from a friend saying " you weigh as much as I do? I wonder why you look so much bigger than me?" smh.
  • crimsoncat
    crimsoncat Posts: 457 Member
    *after seeing my before pictures*

    "Wow.... You've changed so much and you look so fantastic now that I can't believe you looked like THAT before."

    It wouldn't have even been an insult until the THAT.
  • From my mother-in-law. 1st time I ever met her, she said to my hubby in front of me "when did you go to FL and get the beach whale." I cursed her out!
    A few months ago she said: "Your starting to look like a baby beach whale now, keep it up."

    Old *kitten* germany woman. LOL
  • I seen that someone posted something like this 4-5 months ago, and it made me laugh. So, what's the most polite insult you've received?

    For me, you carry your weight well. My mother in law keeps getting me clothes, even though I've asked her not to cause I get depressed about it, "These are too big for me, but they'll fit you."

    and, even if a guy is trying to be polite, this happened last week at work. "Excuse me Ma'am." Do I look like I am old enough to be called Ma'am?!

    few of mine, what's yours?

    Oh i always get the "You carry your weight well" 1 and this one time this guy approached me in a bar and said you're really fit for a fat girl, I said "Ok"?? He was like I usually don't go for big girls but i fancy you. Errrmmm, no!! LOl!!
  • mnmoon
    mnmoon Posts: 22 Member
    From my mother-in-law. 1st time I ever met her, she said to my hubby in front of me "when did you go to FL and get the beach whale." I cursed her out!
    A few months ago she said: "Your starting to look like a baby beach whale now, keep it up."

    Old *kitten* germany woman. LOL


    Holy moly!! Who says that to another person?!? Wow...That is shocking to me! Good for you for standing up to her!!
  • NeverGivesUp
    NeverGivesUp Posts: 960 Member
    I remember a long time ago my car broke down and the driver had to take me and the car to a service station.. He asked what I was studying for and I told him I wanted to be a singer. He looked shocked and told me I wasn't pretty enough to do that for a living.
  • zombilishious
    zombilishious Posts: 1,250 Member
    Mine actually isn't weight related, but work related ...

    I worked at a law firm that was a "boys' club" (my personality DID NOT fit). I was working with a client defending a $26 million dollar claim, having only worked at this firm for about 7 months and assigned this case about a month into my employment. 6 weeks before trial, the head partner got involved and had a conference call with said client. Apparently, client raved about me because afterwards, I was called into his office so he could tell me "[client] really likes you. I don't know why, but she does."

    I think I got him back - twice. He called me into his office another time to tell me "you just don't get how I like things." A discussion ensued about the lack of "how he likes things" training, and he ended by saying "well, the only person who ever got me is dead." My response "I'm sorry sir. I'm good, but I can't channel the dead."

    A month later I switched sides and went to work for the most feared female attorney in the state - and his arch-enemy :devil: :happy:
  • From my mother-in-law. 1st time I ever met her, she said to my hubby in front of me "when did you go to FL and get the beach whale." I cursed her out!
    A few months ago she said: "Your starting to look like a baby beach whale now, keep it up."

    Old *kitten* germany woman. LOL


    Holy moly!! Who says that to another person?!? Wow...That is shocking to me! Good for you for standing up to her!!

    It was rough the first few months. But what she nor me realized. I was pregnant with my daughter. I was with my hubby for a while before I met her because she thought I was "after her money" like my hubbys ex. So she didnt want to met me... LOL

    She loves me to death now =)
  • lmbs1966
    lmbs1966 Posts: 57 Member
    I went to a yard sale, where I asked the lady running it, if she had any furniture for sale, she showed me two end tables and then steered me over to a clothes table and said " I have some really nice clothes here that would fit you, cause I used to be fat like you too". She proceeded to tell me that she lost all here weight by drinking green tea. Needless to say, I didn't buy anything at her sale, but I did go to the grocery store to buy some green tea! lol
  • sarahrbraun
    sarahrbraun Posts: 2,261 Member
    I seen that someone posted something like this 4-5 months ago, and it made me laugh. So, what's the most polite insult you've received?

    For me, you carry your weight well. My mother in law keeps getting me clothes, even though I've asked her not to cause I get depressed about it, "These are too big for me, but they'll fit you."

    and, even if a guy is trying to be polite, this happened last week at work. "Excuse me Ma'am." Do I look like I am old enough to be called Ma'am?!

    few of mine, what's yours?

    I get Ma'am on a regular basis...have been for years and I am still in my 30s :(

    I'm not sure if I should be insulted or not...I'm thinking not...Last week I was chatting with the fitness monitor at the gym ( who is like 70) and I showed him a picture of me pre-kids--20yo, 135lbs, 38-26-36 measurements--and he said "don't take this the wrong way, but I think you have a better shape now". I am taking that as he prefers the shape of a more mature woman--the softening of the curves that takes place once you have carried a child.

    I think I am more hurt, and sort of insulted, that people have not made comments about my obviously losing weight. In December I saw my inlaws for the first time in MONTHS, and no one said a thing!
  • Maidofmer
    Maidofmer Posts: 908 Member
    "I'm sorry sir. I'm good, but I can't channel the dead."



    hahaha
  • Maidofmer
    Maidofmer Posts: 908 Member
    When I joined a gym 2 years ago, I didn't know what anything was. (had blonde hair at the time) so I went to the ellipticals, no one was on them with the trainer, giving me a tour, and I asked him what it was and what they do (area of the body they work out) and he laughed. I apparently didn't get the joke and he says,

    "it's ok, after all, you are a natural blonde right?"

    I asked him if he ever heard the one time the blonde got the douche bag fired.
  • denezy
    denezy Posts: 573 Member
    "Congratulations on dating a white guy"

    Had nothing to do with my weight, but I was all kinds of WTF!
  • "Congratulations on dating a white guy"

    Had nothing to do with my weight, but I was all kinds of WTF!

    I get the :O face when people realize my kids are white.

    I do the WTF too! LOL people are so quick to judge and sterotype!
  • Jewel0124
    Jewel0124 Posts: 119 Member
    A former co-worker who saw my college graduation picture and said you USED to be so pretty. I thought to myself, well what the hell am I now??
  • firstsip
    firstsip Posts: 8,399 Member
    Probably the "explicit, specific insult" followed with "and have a blessed day!"
  • Reeny1_8
    Reeny1_8 Posts: 277
    haha . another one I thought of that my step dad used to joke with.What kind of shampoo do people with no neck buy? head and shoulders.

    *ouch*
  • Reeny1_8
    Reeny1_8 Posts: 277
    From my mother-in-law. 1st time I ever met her, she said to my hubby in front of me "when did you go to FL and get the beach whale." I cursed her out!
    A few months ago she said: "Your starting to look like a baby beach whale now, keep it up."

    Old *kitten* germany woman. LOL
    [/quote

    My jaw just hit the floor!