Do you view someone's success differently if......
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Nope. I figure they've worked hard to get where they are, and know that most folks don't take surgery like that lightly.0
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I view it differently in that I don't think that diet and exercise advice from them would be applicable to my situation. I have had three abdominal surgeries. Recovery from that absolutely sucks! I think there are some doctors out there that aren't necessarily as ethical about who can get this surgery. It is still hard work, it is still dedication. I'll worry about how I get to my goal and let others worry about theirs!0
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Ummm I had surgery...and I have to diet and exercise just as much as everyone else. Unfortunately no surgery allows you to just sit on your butt and watch the fat magically fall off. Just saying...0
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Yes and no. Kudos to them to doing whatever it takes to lose their weight, and I am happy for them. However, I have a lot more admiration and respect for people who have lost a similar amount of weight through non surgical means.0
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No. After seeing what my mother has gone through and almost losing her, I cannot judge. Weight loss surgery is not an easy way out. We all have different struggles and they are all relative to our situation.0
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If someone became fit and healthy through a weight loss surgery I would still be equally inspired as if they were to lose the weight just through conscious diet and exercise. Plenty of people who get weight loss surgery still overeat afterward and end up gaining weight again anyway. You have to use the tool you've been given effectively to achieve the success that we see on the outside. I'd definitely be more inspired by someone who became thin and healthy through weight loss surgery than I would be by someone who say "Eff it, I'm never going to lose weight," and uses that as an excuse to eat Mcdonald's twice a day, 'erryday.0
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I don't see their success differently if they can maintain the lifestyle that surgery pushes them towards...
I hate it when I see people who get the surgery but then go back to their old habits and gain the weight back. It makes me think that they thought the surgery would solve all of their problems and they didn't want to put in any effort.0 -
While I'm not happier for one person more then the other (natural vs. Surgical assistance ) there ia a different level of admiration for those able to dig down and succeed on their own. I don't judge, I think to each his own...but a difference, yes.
Also those insinuating their bodies weren't cooperating thus COULDN'T lose weight, that irks me. Esp from someone starting at a morbid weight. Its simple science folks. Now admitting they initially didn't have the mental wherewithall it takes to take on a huge change and needed help...there is nothing wrong with that.
I'm happy for everyone who reaches a healthy weight and is happy...assistance or not.0 -
It doesn't. All of those methods are no guarantee. People have those procedures and don't lose much and/or gain it all back once they adjust.
No matter how they lost, they lost. Good for them.
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I see it as different. All three people i know that have had wls are struggling again with their weight. However i am excited for another friend that is on the list, because her knees are so bad that it is painful for her to move. I still celebrate those that overcome towering obsticals and do it on their own, i feel they learn something from it that impowers them to have long term success.0
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If everyone used this as their guiding principle, then there would be very little activity in the forums. Like it or not, discussing topics that affect other people is kind of what goes on here.Can this please become a sticky. It's like people forget what "forum" means.
Yes, maybe even one that states that you open yourself up to ALL opinions when posting in the forum, even ones you may not like or agree with.0 -
This is making me think: I lose weight really easily and always have. No one should admire me for losing weight, but they have and probably will (I hope to have baby weight to lose). People have asked me for tips, which I have given, but the real one, 'Just be me,' isn't going to work for anyone else. So, success should be put in a context, but surgery v. natural is perhaps not the most important one.0
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Well sweetheart, I'm one of the few who has lost 100+ and kept it all off. I did it all by myself with dieting and exercise. It took two long years but surgery is not always needed. I'm dealing with loose skin issues now. I was 346.4 at my heaviest so, it is possible to change and do it your own way. God bless and good luck. 0
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Absolutely not. I have a friend that chose to have the surgery and she and I got to talking a couple weeks ago. Even after the surgery she still has the same struggles I do to eat right and to exercise and to not gain it all back. It is a different journey for everyone and each person has to decided what is best for them0
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I don't believe so, but I do think find the surgery strange - from what I understand, it means a lifetime of eating tiny portions of certain foods with the threat of vomiting. Which is really just dealing with the symptoms of overeating, not the cause.0
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To be honest, I do view them differently. I just don't see how it's necessary to drastically alter your body to get results. So many people, of EVERY size, do this with diet and exercise alone. That's not to say they are better or more admirable, just that their approach makes more sense to me than surgery.0
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For my own .02.. I don't judge the person, but I don't consider their loss to be the same as what someone else may have done without the surgery.
For what it's worth, I've busted my *kitten* for every pound I've lost and it angers me when someone asks what surgery I had. I typically respond with "I had the getoffofmyassectomy."
Do I weigh the same as someone else that's at 190lbs that may have lost their weight through a major surgery? Absolutely. The scale doesn't know the difference. Do I feel that I've gained more for having done it my way? Absofreakinglutely. It doesn't make them a bad or weak person, just that I did what I did for me.. and they did what they did, for them.0 -
I will admit I did feel one friend was cheating when she had a band put in. She didnt understand the whole concept of it and expected miraculous weightloss which never happened for her, she is still a very large girl and is now considering having it tightened. :ohwell: she doesn't eat right at all and then complains.
Another friend had the band put in and her weightloss and effort was amazing, she is a totally different girl and although I was a little jealous at first, I quickly got over that when she told me what she goes through trying to find things to eat that wont aggravate her. I supported her, just like she supports me, I dont have anywhere near the weight to lose that she had, so Im happy for her.0 -
IMO, Yes, I think it's a cop out for everyone who wants an easy, quick fix without effort. Well it's not easy, either way! I'll get bashed for it but.. my sister has always been lazy and wanted to lose weight with a magic wand. She wanted to eat junk and never, ever exercised. She wouldn't even walk half a block down her street. She finally did lose weight with gastric bypass, but then, at 53, had 3 strokes and is now disabled and has gained her weight back. Granted she did not follow the rules, still did not exercise, etc. so it's her own fault and now her LIFE is ruined. It is NOT a CURE for obesity. Dealing with mental issues has to be done and I'm sick of our country putting it on a back burner!
I say do it the right way. We all know what we are supposed to do, but do we do it? No, because we are not eating right for some reason or another. Get pyschological help for the reasons you are overeating, because if you don't get through those issues, you wont ever have success! Then get moving and start eating right. If you are doing those things, there is no reason why you wont lose weight.
We all have a MENTAL reason for overeating. Mine was too much drama in my life due to family who was abusing my mother who has alzheimers and several other reasons. Find your reasons why, then the rest is easy.
I'll add that I don't put everyone into the group of people like my sister. If you get the mental help, have surgery, follow the rules, exercise and eat right, I'm still proud of you! It all comes down to being willing to help yourself. Only YOU can make those changes, regardless of how you do it.0 -
I know people who have had surgery, and after seeing the "side effects" they've had, I sometimes think they've had it worse than I am ... one of the guys at work had to do it for health reasons, and he has the worst time with digestion, particularly any sort of meat. Almost everyone I know who's had it done (you'd be surprised how many do it), has some sort of issue with food that they can't eat or digest or ... whatever. And there IS a risk of death ... there was a woman in the news not THAT long ago who died as a result of an infection from her gastric bypass surgery.
It makes me think that surgery, lap band, etc., isn't the easy way out ... it's the scary way out. I'll just count calories, thanks.0 -
yes 100%.
I dont think of them as lesser than those who did it the hard way - but I do think that they missed out on what those who did it through hard work- gained.
getting fit the old fashioned way makes you mentally stronger, emotionally better able to cope with obstacles, you learn yourself better because you face fears head on and are constantly proving to yourself (without anyone on the outside being in your head with you) that you can tackle anything if you try hard enough - that you can evolve your body on your own, your life, your path, the direction you want to move forward in., making these things actually happen for yourself through hard work, to me, brings with it a strong sense of self that you just cant get without the patience and sweat of spending years cultivating a relationship with yourself.
my brain cant wrap itself around how you can gain all those same things while you're unconscious in surgery.
That's the thing, gastric patients whether its, RNY, Sleeve or lap band have to work just as hard as everyone that hasn't had it done. It's not like you just have the surgery, keep eating the way you did, sit around on the couch and lose the weight. You have to work just as hard and work out just as hard. The psychological challenges that come with it, I think sometimes are harder because you're body does change so quickly that you're mind a lot of the time hasn't caught up. The initial quick loss comes in the first few months, and to keep it coming off you have to work just as hard as everyone else. The quick loss comes from the severe calorie deficit you're eating at.
If you don't follow the plan, workout, etc....yes you will gain it back just like anyone else. It's not a miracle cure.
I feel stronger about severely touched up pictures, or obviously doctored ones. I prefer authentic over anything else.0 -
yes 100%.
I dont think of them as lesser than those who did it the hard way - but I do think that they missed out on what those who did it through hard work- gained.
getting fit the old fashioned way makes you mentally stronger, emotionally better able to cope with obstacles, you learn yourself better because you face fears head on and are constantly proving to yourself (without anyone on the outside being in your head with you) that you can tackle anything if you try hard enough - that you can evolve your body on your own, your life, your path, the direction you want to move forward in., making these things actually happen for yourself through hard work, to me, brings with it a strong sense of self that you just cant get without the patience and sweat of spending years cultivating a relationship with yourself.
my brain cant wrap itself around how you can gain all those same things while you're unconscious in surgery.
That's the thing, gastric patients whether its, RNY, Sleeve or lap band have to work just as hard as everyone that hasn't had it done. It's not like you just have the surgery, keep eating the way you did, sit around on the couch and lose the weight. You have to work just as hard and work out just as hard. The psychological challenges that come with it, I think sometimes are harder because you're body does change so quickly that you're mind a lot of the time hasn't caught up. The initial quick loss comes in the first few months, and to keep it coming off you have to work just as hard as everyone else. The quick loss comes from the severe calorie deficit you're eating at.
If you don't follow the plan, workout, etc....yes you will gain it back just like anyone else. It's not a miracle cure.
also - like the other girl said, I was referring to getting fit - you are referring to losing weight.0 -
NO
Some folks have such restrictions that they cannot get to their goal weight any other way.
For instance: I have a neuromuscular disease and fragile back (from disease). Exercise for me is almost nothing due to back restrictions. I ride my bike when I can and sometimes can do some cardio swimming (rare) but thats it. And you gym fiends plz do not respond and tell me what I can and cannot do, you don't know my situation. My journey will take a very long time but I am committed. I am not going the surgery route but can empathize.
Some other folks have very debilitating conditions where surgery is the ONLY option to even get on their feet and have a chance to exercise.
Remember the old axioms: "Don't judge a book by its cover" and "Don't judge someone until you've walked a mile in their shoes"
just my .020 -
I didn't even think about reading someone's profile to see if they had WLS.
But to the original topic, do I view someone's success differently if.... well, no. I don't. I view it as success and really any time I see someone's ticker no matter the number, I view it as success because by God, they are on MFP and they are reading and thinking and having active dialogue about losing weight. They are succeeding in my book at least but I have been told that I have unreasonably high expectations.
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I love all of these people saying, "We have to work just as hard! We have to eat right! We exercise! You have no idea how hard this is!"
So then why have the surgery? Why not just eat right and exercise and NOT go through the surgery? If you can watch your portions and exercise "just like everyone else", then why have your stomach altered?
Oh? Because it's hard to do all of that?
BINGO. That's the POINT of why you get judged. That's why I have zero respect for anyone who cheats and has surgery or takes phentermine.
I get so angry when people who've had surgery give advice to "JUST EAT LESS". Your stomach is the size of a nickel. Don't tell me what to do to fill my normal-size stomach. That's like taking financial advice from a rich kid who starts out with Daddy's money and tells me to "just stop spending as much".
You cheated. Just own it. And if you could have done it yourself, you would have. My favorites are the ones who have to lose 40 pounds first. If you could lose 40 pounds the regular way, why have the surgery at all?
Oh, that's right, because it's EASIER AND FASTER to have surgery.
So don't sit there and tell me our struggle is exactly the same. Don't even try.0 -
I guess I'm missing how someone who has surgery, then loses weight and gets fit "misses out" on anything. They don't get wheeled out of surgery 200lbs lighter. They still have work to do. They still have the same mental and physical battles.
What's the difference between someone who has surgery, loses lots of weight, then gains it all back and someone who loses the weight strictly by diet and exercise and gains it all back? Nothing.0 -
I guess I'm missing how someone who has surgery, then loses weight and gets fit "misses out" on anything. They don't get wheeled out of surgery 200lbs lighter. They still have work to do. They still have the same mental and physical battles.
What's the difference between someone who has surgery, loses lots of weight, then gains it all back and someone who loses the weight strictly by diet and exercise and gains it all back? Nothing.
Exactly. So why even have the surgery in the first place? That's my point.0 -
Exactly. So why even have the surgery in the first place? That's my point.
Because some people need it to save their lives. You may be able to go from 400 lbs to 150 with just diet and exercise, but for many people that big, it's hard to even get started. Have you ever been so big that you cannot exercise? Have you ever been so big and used to eating so much that you feel physical pains when you try dieting?
Not everyone is like those people on Chris Powell's Extreme Make-Over Weight Loss.0 -
I guess I'm missing how someone who has surgery, then loses weight and gets fit "misses out" on anything. They don't get wheeled out of surgery 200lbs lighter. They still have work to do. They still have the same mental and physical battles.
What's the difference between someone who has surgery, loses lots of weight, then gains it all back and someone who loses the weight strictly by diet and exercise and gains it all back? Nothing.
one person has a doctor's physical help on altering their body and one is all by their lonesome with no alterations. to me that small difference might make a difference in what they take from the experience.
which is why i specified that I do NOT think less of them, only that I worry that they might miss out on something.0 -
one person has a doctor's physical help on altering their body and one is all by their lonesome with no alterations. to me that small difference might make a difference in what they take from the experience. which is why i specified that I do NOT think less of them, only that I worry that they might miss out on something.
Once they leave the hospital, they're doing the rest all by their lonesome. All those surgeries do is limit the amount of food they can eat comfortably. Some can and do still over eat. The battles post surgery are the same as those who don't have the surgery. It takes mental and physical strength for those people to lose the weight, even after surgery. Or, I should say, in my experience with those who have had these types of surgeries that is the case.0
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