Couples- separate or combined finances?

slimcakelady

When I was married, my husband and I always kept separate accounts. We agreed who would be responsible for paying certain bills, and we were each responsible for our own car note. We rarely had arguements about money, and if either one of us wanted to buy something we did with our own money as long as the other bills were getting paid. Once we got the divorced (for reasons other than money issues), it was a clean split.

ashleab37

One family, one marriage, one bank account.

We have done it this way since we got married. When we first were married, we both worked, and all the money went into one account. We had discussions about what to spend money on, but never arguments. There are no "wants" that one of us has above the common good of our family.

For the past 12 years, since our son was born, my wife has not worked outside the home, and we still have one bank account. I contribute 100% of the household money because I have the salaried job, but I have never thought of the money as mine. It is ours. And we still don't argue about money.

Call me old-fashioned, but I have problems with statements such as "we each contribute an equal amount to a joint account to pay the bills, and whatever is left is mine to spend on my toys". I had a co-worker that was heading south for a winter vacation. I asked if her husband was going, and she said "no, he didn't have enough money to pay for his half, so I'm going with some other friends". Didn't get it then, don't get it now.

I'm with you. I just don't get it. I wouldn't marry a person I wasn't comfortable sharing my finances with.

MJ0214

Combined. What's the need for a separate account unless you are doing something that you don't want the other knowing about?

wjewell

One family, one marriage, one bank account.

We have done it this way since we got married. When we first were married, we both worked, and all the money went into one account. We had discussions about what to spend money on, but never arguments. There are no "wants" that one of us has above the common good of our family.

For the past 12 years, since our son was born, my wife has not worked outside the home, and we still have one bank account. I contribute 100% of the household money because I have the salaried job, but I have never thought of the money as mine. It is ours. And we still don't argue about money.

Call me old-fashioned, but I have problems with statements such as "we each contribute an equal amount to a joint account to pay the bills, and whatever is left is mine to spend on my toys". I had a co-worker that was heading south for a winter vacation. I asked if her husband was going, and she said "no, he didn't have enough money to pay for his half, so I'm going with some other friends". Didn't get it then, don't get it now.

I don't get that either... Although we do keep our finances separate, we wouldn't ever do something like that. In fact, I just bought him a trip to vegas for Christmas. I would never tell him if he couldn't afford his half that he couldn't go, and he wouldn't do that to me either. That is s little overboard.

Sherbog

43 years legally married and 46 years of friendship with the same guy. We share a joint account and have separate accounts. It has worked out well over the years. The one thing we have never disagreed about is money.

ShmoozyQ

Separate in this household, not for any reason in particular. Works fine for us.

paulaviki

I had a co-worker that was heading south for a winter vacation. I asked if her husband was going, and she said "no, he didn't have enough money to pay for his half, so I'm going with some other friends". Didn't get it then, don't get it now.

See that, I do not understand. if we couldn't both afford to do something then neither of us would go. And if one of us was short the other would help out. Having split accounts doesn't mean not sharing still!

GoMizzou99

One family, one marriage, one bank account.

Same here. Combined from day 1 through 26+ years of marriage. The only thing that is separate is our retirement accounts which is required by Federal law. The wife pays the bills and I do the investing.

ALSO - if you really love your family, get a will and set up a trust.

carleighsmama

We have a joint checking/savings. It's just easier to pay for all of our bills. We don't fight over money. Neither one of us are big spenders. When we make big purchases, we pay cash. For the small amount of credit card debt we have, it's easy to make larger payments when our money is combined.

Tank_Girl

Times are tight as our income has been reduced significantly... We dont have any personal money at the moment and i control the finances.

When we have a decent wage coming in we split whats left over 50/50 to buy clothes, luxury goods, sporting gear

McChubbyruewho

I've been happiely married for almost 6 years,We have are own weird little system

its like we split up the bills, I make more so I pay more bills, then the rest is his fun free money and my fun free money.

We split any extra cash we get like taxes or like legal settlments like when Wal mart had to pay him for a class action lawsuit, we split it half.

We don't do bank accounts, we pay in cash, we don't beleive in paying for money we have earned lol and we split groceirs, he gives me money every other week, then I pay the other half of the month, but I do the shoping cause If it were up to him he would buy potatos and water lol

We file taxes jointly, and we do have a joint IRA, and other investments for our old age, cause we will be old one day togther

I really like how we have it, I have money I can spend however I want and so does he, its really freeing!

My Nanna and Pappa have done the same things for years, and they have been happiely married for years

so it can work great, not one realationship is the same as another

KevDaniel

We are in it together, good or bad..

MeDoula

I don't understand separate accounts. We have a joint account. Everyone has their budget for their "wants".

umachanxo

My husband and I have had a shared account since before we were married. I believe we had been living together for a year or so. This works for us as it makes it easier for bills and other financial responsibilities as a couple. We're both good with money, and discuss purchases with each other if they're big. As for me going out and buying clothes or something for me and vice versa, we can do that as long as we don't go overboard.

It really depends on the couple.

LaurenAOK

My wife, and I have our separate accounts, and a joint account. We both transfer money into the joint account to pay the bills, then use our separate accounts to buy our own "wants, or needs".

It works wonderfully, for us.

This is exactly what most of my married friends do and what I plan to do as well. The joint account makes paying bills easy but your separate accounts let you keep your freedom!

HeidiMightyRawr

For me and my SO (we've lived together since June '10) we basically, share the bills but split the rest.

- Payday money goes into our separate banks.
- I work out the budget, what bills and stuff we have to pay etc etc
- Money gets transferred according to what direct debits come out of where (yay for internet banking!)
- Excess money that isn't needed for bills is split down the middle, and sent off to each account.
- We either keep track personally of what money is spare, or we take it out in cash.

Advantages:
- Nobody loses out because they earn less. Even though we earn the same, in theory I could earn £800 and him £1200 and we'd still have the same money each to spend on ourselves.
- My money is my money, and same for him. I get to spend all my money on clothes or useless crap if I want to, guilt free! He gets to spend his money on whatever he wants. No complaints, it's all equal.

Holidays and big things like that are saved up for together. Eg: We might put £100 aside one month, that will come out of "bills money"

TheConsciousFoody

We do a bit of both

butterflyqueen1984

Myself and soon to be husband have a joint bank account for our bills, which pays for heating, water, mortgage food etc and then we have a joint savings account which we put money into every month. For these accounts we have set up a standing order each month. Then what ever is left from our wages we keep in our own personal bank accounts which we would then put some into our individual savings if we had enough and spend the rest. However, when one of us stops working due to having a family this will more likely change, I am more than likely going to be the full time worker while my partner stays at home. I will be giving him some money so that he can spend on himself, I think different situations work for different people and sometimes you have to change it with time.

skinnyinnotime

One family, one marriage, one bank account.


Call me old-fashioned, but I have problems with statements such as "we each contribute an equal amount to a joint account to pay the bills, and whatever is left is mine to spend on my toys". I had a co-worker that was heading south for a winter vacation. I asked if her husband was going, and she said "no, he didn't have enough money to pay for his half, so I'm going with some other friends". Didn't get it then, don't get it now.

I'm with you. I just don't get it. I wouldn't marry a person I wasn't comfortable sharing my finances with.

It's simple, he clearly was cr@p at saving and spent his money whilst she saved so she could have a holiday.

tlacox1

Personally I believe that when you get married you become ONE unit. That's what marriage is to me so we have one account. It is about working together and compromising.