Father brings his daughter into the men's locker room

Meg_78

Really? This nimrod brings his 4 year old daughter into the men's locker room at the gym. I saw him do it a few weeks ago but couldn't catch him (I was too busy diving for a towel). What would you do? I lost it and confronted him. Probably didn't handle it too well. There's naked men walking around without towels. Am I insane or was this guy completely clueless?

This is very much about culture. I'd not react if this happened to such a young child around here. Nudity is not a taboo, and kids have seen naked men before. I don't think it's a problem if boys that age go with their mothers either.

I do however understand that it's more of a taboo for you. But consider that the father may not have the same background as you, and to him, you are the person with the problematic worldview. You see a little girl in a locker room, and you think about abuse and inappropriate exposure. He sees a little girl in a locker room, and he sees a child too young for anybody to harm, accompanying her loving father. In some parts of the world, his is the sane and sensible approach.

It might at least be worth considering before you get in his face. A polite discussion about what is culturally acceptable might be better.

I agree, here in Sweden it would be a non issue, actually a fairly common place event...Perhaps many European countries are just more comfortable with nudity in a non sexual way..I can't believe the overreaction I'm seeing here,

thyan

I agree, completely inappropriate. I also have seen women bring their sons into the women's changing area. Don't go to the gym if you can't get someone to watch your child. Where will the child go while you are working out? Really stupid!

Martucha123

Really? This nimrod brings his 4 year old daughter into the men's locker room at the gym. I saw him do it a few weeks ago but couldn't catch him (I was too busy diving for a towel). What would you do? I lost it and confronted him. Probably didn't handle it too well. There's naked men walking around without towels. Am I insane or was this guy completely clueless?

This is very much about culture. I'd not react if this happened to such a young child around here. Nudity is not a taboo, and kids have seen naked men before. I don't think it's a problem if boys that age go with their mothers either.

I do however understand that it's more of a taboo for you. But consider that the father may not have the same background as you, and to him, you are the person with the problematic worldview. You see a little girl in a locker room, and you think about abuse and inappropriate exposure. He sees a little girl in a locker room, and he sees a child too young for anybody to harm, accompanying her loving father. In some parts of the world, his is the sane and sensible approach.

It might at least be worth considering before you get in his face. A polite discussion about what is culturally acceptable might be better.

I agree, here in Sweden it would be a non issue, actually a fairly common place event...Perhaps many European countries are just more comfortable with nudity in a non sexual way..I can't believe the overreaction I'm seeing here,

this 100x
In my gym children under 8 are allowed to change with parents, no family cubicles, and lots of bits hanging everywhere
I don't think kids really care about the bits until certain age

sakali

I think everyone is over-reacting. She's 4 and seeing a penis at 4 really isn't that big of a deal... unless YOU make it a big deal. To a 4 year old child it's just part of your body and it's certainly nothing sexual or inappropriate.

clover5

We have multiple family locker rooms. "What's wrong with you? This is a mens locker room and it's no place for a little girl!", I said. The morons reply? "Well she's four years old". . . . . Huh?

WTG!

dovetail22uk

I agree, completely inappropriate. I also have seen women bring their sons into the women's changing area. Don't go to the gym if you can't get someone to watch your child. Where will the child go while you are working out? Really stupid!

Maybe they were going swimming together or something?

FFS! I think we should end this thread!

LiftAllThePizzas

I'm still laughing at the image of a bunch of grown men scrambling for towels and standing on their tippy toes on a stool shrieking, "EEEEK!!!! A LITTLE GIRL!!!!!!"

Lib_B

I agree, completely inappropriate. I also have seen women bring their sons into the women's changing area. Don't go to the gym if you can't get someone to watch your child. Where will the child go while you are working out? Really stupid!

our Y has childcare available while we workout. we also frequently, after our workouts, take the kids to swim in the pool. i am an american, yet i cannot believe how we will tolerate violence, etc. on television, but see a naked *kitten* and OMG, the world is gonna end. jesus. it's not as though there are sexual acts going on in locker rooms - and if there are - THOSE are the things that need to be reported. not a little girl changing with her dad.

_Timmeh_

I'm going to the gym with my mom this Saturday, I hope she takes into the wimmenz locker room.

BeeElMarvin

I'm still laughing at the image of a bunch of grown men scrambling for towels and standing on their tippy toes on a stool shrieking, "EEEEK!!!! A LITTLE GIRL!!!!!!"

Yeah, that's a whole lot funnier than thinking about them NOT covering up and wandering around with their junk hanging out like it normally is in the men's locker. If there's a family locker room it should have been used. It might be "no big deal" to some, but to others it may be a huge deal. Oh, and by the way there are real freaking pervs out there that would love to wag their weiner for a 4 year old.

fbmandy55

I wouldn't think twice if someone brought a 4 yr old boy into the women's locker room. I don't really see the big deal either. If there were family locker rooms available though then he's just an idiot.

Same here. My son is 4 and he always comes with me into women's restrooms and such.

Dad is with her and not sending her in alone, so it's not like she isn't safe and it's not like she is the one who is naked in front of a bunch of men.

The world would be a much better place if people didn't teach their kids that a naked human body is wrong or dirty. It's nature.

fbmandy55

i agree a young girl should not be in a room full of naked men..anything could happen

Really?!?? What would happen to her with her father RIGHT THERE!! I doubt he is going to let her leave his side.

No kidding, statistically, she would be more in danger in a changing room with family. As sexual predators are usually family or friends.

Just one more post that prove how stupid and brainwashed society has made people.

obsidianwings

For me, this discussion just reinforces the need in public areas to have clear and consistent guidelines that are enforced. Some people have legitimate differences of opinion and some don't have an ounce of common sense or common courtesy.

We have very nice family changing rooms, so we keep the rules simple: in the men's or women's locker rooms, all the parts have to match, otherwise use the family rooms. Yeah, sometimes you might to wait 5 minutest. TS.

As a group, people are not that rational, especially when it comes to their kids. I guarantee that I'd we let 2 yr olds of mixed gender in the locker rooms, in no time at all, some helicopter parent would be bringing in teenagers

It's the norm here, and I've never seen that happen.

I am not traumatised from remembering the mens changing room, i am just glad i got to go swimming instead of having to stay home because my mum can't swim. I'm sure i would have been traumatised at least for a while about a man coming up to my dad and shouting at him about me (although if it happened i think now i could probably look back and see he was just a dumbass).

I still new it was not ok for people to touch me, and that's it's not right for someone to jump out a bush waggling their penis at me.

I have also seen the nude form in non sexual artwork *gasp*

Seriously what do you want to do in the changing room that you can't do with a kid there, make a porno?! I am not all that exposed in the changing rooms myself anyway.

Azdak

For me, this discussion just reinforces the need in public areas to have clear and consistent guidelines that are enforced. Some people have legitimate differences of opinion and some don't have an ounce of common sense or common courtesy.

We have very nice family changing rooms, so we keep the rules simple: in the men's or women's locker rooms, all the parts have to match, otherwise use the family rooms. Yeah, sometimes you might to wait 5 minutest. TS.

As a group, people are not that rational, especially when it comes to their kids. I guarantee that I'd we let 2 yr olds of mixed gender in the locker rooms, in no time at all, some helicopter parent would be bringing in teenagers

It's the norm here, and I've never seen that happen.

I am not traumatised from remembering the mens changing room, i am just glad i got to go swimming instead of having to stay home because my mum can't swim. I'm sure i would have been traumatised at least for a while about a man coming up to my dad and shouting at him about me (although if it happened i think now i could probably look back and see he was just a dumbass).

I still new it was not ok for people to touch me, and that's it's not right for someone to jump out a bush waggling their penis at me.

I have also seen the nude form in non sexual artwork *gasp*

Seriously what do you want to do in the changing room that you can't do with a kid there, make a porno?! I am not all that exposed in the changing rooms myself anyway.

You are missing my point. I am not advocating a position one way or the other. I work in these situations every day, so it is not a hypothetical. My opinion on whether or not it is appropriate is irrelevant. But, when you have 3,000 people sharing space, you have to try to make everyone feel comfortable. It's not my job to change society's attitudes towards public nudity.

Some people are selfish jerks and a lot of people are morons. I don't have the time or interest to sort them all out. Which leads to my original point, which is that, whatever the position of the establishment, you need to have policies that are clearly communicated and consistently enforced. And, in a large group situation, especially a situation in which people have voluntarily joined and agreed to abide by the policies and procedures, you don't get to pick and choose which rules you want to follow.

MightyDomo

We have multiple family locker rooms. "What's wrong with you? This is a mens locker room and it's no place for a little girl!", I said. The morons reply? "Well she's four years old". . . . . Huh?

Wow I guess when she starts remembering seeing his junk and doesn't like talking to him because of it then he will realize his big mistake... kids don't need to see that, they may be young but they are incredibly impressionable especially at young ages. He needs to learn how to go to a family locker room where her eyes are protected from seeing dong to early.

abrewer563

That's just crazy to me, and gross. I also think it's equally gross and creepy for women to bring their sons into the women's locker room, especially if a family locker room is available.

Then again I don't like to anyone to see me naked, so I wouldn't get undressed in a locker room anyway or use it at all.

LikeNoOneElse84

This one is tough. Not everyone freaks about nudity. He was more than likely 100% okay with his daughter being there so I don't really see the issue. She is four and besides asking questions, there was nothing really inappropriate about it IMO. No one was doing anything that would scar her so it's not really a big deal.

mommyrocks5

I wouldn't think twice if someone brought a 4 yr old boy into the women's locker room. I don't really see the big deal either. If there were family locker rooms available though then he's just an idiot.

THIS^^^^

obsidianwings

For me, this discussion just reinforces the need in public areas to have clear and consistent guidelines that are enforced. Some people have legitimate differences of opinion and some don't have an ounce of common sense or common courtesy.

We have very nice family changing rooms, so we keep the rules simple: in the men's or women's locker rooms, all the parts have to match, otherwise use the family rooms. Yeah, sometimes you might to wait 5 minutest. TS.

As a group, people are not that rational, especially when it comes to their kids. I guarantee that I'd we let 2 yr olds of mixed gender in the locker rooms, in no time at all, some helicopter parent would be bringing in teenagers

It's the norm here, and I've never seen that happen.

I am not traumatised from remembering the mens changing room, i am just glad i got to go swimming instead of having to stay home because my mum can't swim. I'm sure i would have been traumatised at least for a while about a man coming up to my dad and shouting at him about me (although if it happened i think now i could probably look back and see he was just a dumbass).

I still new it was not ok for people to touch me, and that's it's not right for someone to jump out a bush waggling their penis at me.

I have also seen the nude form in non sexual artwork *gasp*

Seriously what do you want to do in the changing room that you can't do with a kid there, make a porno?! I am not all that exposed in the changing rooms myself anyway.

You are missing my point. I am not advocating a position one way or the other. I work in these situations every day, so it is not a hypothetical. My opinion on whether or not it is appropriate is irrelevant. But, when you have 3,000 people sharing space, you have to try to make everyone feel comfortable. It's not my job to change society's attitudes towards public nudity.

Some people are selfish jerks and a lot of people are morons. I don't have the time or interest to sort them all out. Which leads to my original point, which is that, whatever the position of the establishment, you need to have policies that are clearly communicated and consistently enforced. And, in a large group situation, especially a situation in which people have voluntarily joined and agreed to abide by the policies and procedures, you don't get to pick and choose which rules you want to follow.

I was referring to your point of guaranteeing if we let 2 year olds in you "guarantee" helicopter parents would start bringing teens in.

Everything else i said was in reply to other points raised over and over again in this thread.

jcstanton

We have multiple family locker rooms. "What's wrong with you? This is a mens locker room and it's no place for a little girl!", I said. The morons reply? "Well she's four years old". . . . . Huh?

If a child is old enough to recognize and verbally identify (even using childlike terms) parts of the human anatomy, they are too old to be in the same room with a naked member of the opposite sex. Sorta makes me wonder what goes on in their home. :huh: