"OMG how did you loose the weight?"

alevett

Someone in another forum used the response "Well, you know *kitten* burns a lot of calories." I'm just waiting for the first person to ask me now so I can fire that at them.

Funny

Richie2shoes

This thread reminded me of an old joke...

Yesterday I was at my local SAM'S CLUB buying a large bag of Purina
dog chow for my loyal pet, Biscuit, the Wonder Dog, and was in the
checkout line when the woman behind me asked if I had a dog.

What did she think I had, an elephant? So since I'm retired and have
little to do, on impulse I told her that no, I didn't have a dog, I
was starting the Purina Diet again. I added that I probably shouldn't,
because I ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50
pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes
coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms.

I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that
it works is to load your pants pockets with Purina nuggets and simply eat
one or two every time you feel hungry. The food is nutritionally complete so
it works well and I was going to try it again.. (I have to
mention here that practically everyone in line was now enthralled with my
story.)

Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care because the
dog food poisoned me. I told her no, I stepped off a curb to sniff an
Irish Setter's *kitten* and a car hit us both.

I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack he was
laughing so hard.

Sam's Club won't let me shop there anymore.

danasings

"I sacrificed a cow to Triglycerides, god of fat. I felt a tingling sensation and then suddenly I was dead sexy." (pronounced "treh-gliss-err-id-ees," to sound more pseudo-Greco-Roman, of course).

Love, love, love this!! :laugh:

DITTO!! Best response ever!!

EvgeniZyntx

This thread reminded me of an old joke...

Yesterday I was at my local SAM'S CLUB buying a large bag of Purina
dog chow for my loyal pet, Biscuit, the Wonder Dog, and was in the
checkout line when the woman behind me asked if I had a dog.

What did she think I had, an elephant? So since I'm retired and have
little to do, on impulse I told her that no, I didn't have a dog, I
was starting the Purina Diet again. I added that I probably shouldn't,
because I ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50
pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes
coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms.

I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that
it works is to load your pants pockets with Purina nuggets and simply eat
one or two every time you feel hungry. The food is nutritionally complete so
it works well and I was going to try it again.. (I have to
mention here that practically everyone in line was now enthralled with my
story.)

Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care because the
dog food poisoned me. I told her no, I stepped off a curb to sniff an
Irish Setter's *kitten* and a car hit us both.

I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack he was
laughing so hard.

Sam's Club won't let me shop there anymore.

Ok, I snorted coffee. :flowerforyou:

csheltra26

just yesterday I had an acquaintance talk to me in detail about this "crazy diet" his wife put him on. He ate saltines and 2 hard boiled eggs for lunch! He asked me what I have been doing and when I told him he said, "yeah, I can't do that". Like icimani said, people just don't want to hear it - they want the special, quick fix then go back to eating like slobs.

Haha!! So...you can eat boiled eggs and saltines for lunch but not whole foods like chicken, potatoes, veggies, and fruits? That is hilarious!!

csheltra26

I had someone the other day, who lost a lot after having their thyroid out, ask me how I did it, since she needs to firm up and has stalled, while stating" I can't exercise due to xyz, they can only walk." So I tell her about Walk away the pounds, but that is no good either, cause she doesn't like moving her arms around! really? Just shrugged my shoulders and thought" Good luck with that!!!!!"

Best. Excuse. Ever.

Wowzers!!!

silvergurl518

"I sacrificed a cow to Triglycerides, god of fat. I felt a tingling sensation and then suddenly I was dead sexy." (pronounced "treh-gliss-err-id-ees," to sound more pseudo-Greco-Roman, of course).

also, you've conveniently lost 69#

stephdeeable

A lot of women at work are on Body By Vi...but not really sticking to it and not really losing weight. I am not doing BBV, but have been losing weight on my own. So other co-workers keep asking me about my weight loss and saying "You're doing Body by Vi, right?". Then they have to listen to me rage out for 10 minutes about my hate for fads. Poor kids.

neanderthin

This always motivated my wife.

[gif]http://dedicated.goofball.com/goofball/photos/2004/picFrance.jpg[/gif]

mizzie1980

I hear you! I've actually had people get mad at me, insisting that I was taking some pill or on some diet (atkins, south beach, what have you), insisting that I was lying to them. One woman even accused me of keeping what I was "really doing" a secret because I didn't want anyone else to get thin and look better than I do. Um, really?

I also hate the people who do believe me when I say I move more and eat less, but turn around and say that they can't do that, they aren't like me, they don't have "willpower." As if I have this magic thing called willpower that makes it easy for me. As if that makes it so I don't want to eat the chips and cookies; makes me always want to go out in the cold and snow after a long day at work to exercise. "Willpower" is a $10 word that people use as an excuse not to do what they know they should. No one has it, some of us just suck it up and do it anyway.

smittybuilt19

I hear you! I've actually had people get mad at me, insisting that I was taking some pill or on some diet (atkins, south beach, what have you), insisting that I was lying to them. One woman even accused me of keeping what I was "really doing" a secret because I didn't want anyone else to get thin and look better than I do. Um, really?

I also hate the people who do believe me when I say I move more and eat less, but turn around and say that they can't do that, they aren't like me, they don't have "willpower." As if I have this magic thing called willpower that makes it easy for me. As if that makes it so I don't want to eat the chips and cookies; makes me always want to go out in the cold and snow after a long day at work to exercise. "Willpower" is a $10 word that people use as an excuse not to do what they know they should. No one has it, some of us just suck it up and do it anyway.

Very well said^^

Corkline

I get the 'Ya riiiight' look when I say its tons of exercise and sensible eating. I swear they'd be more inclined to believe me if I said 'Meth' :grumble:

I'mma start using this. Thanks!

EatClean_WashUrNuts

1. Dont expect overnight success.
2. Stay true and honest with yourself
3. Take action on the right choices that bring you success!
4. Leave the "fad" crap alone.

astrampe

:sad: I was just told this morning (on a fb group) by someone that I should not tell people who wants to take diet pills that it is unhealthy, as "you have know idea what it feels like to be obese, and exercise and eating healthy is not easy and not always possible if you are obese"....And that people who are not obese should not tell other people how to do it....
Uhm,,,yeah, I was obese, I did it the hard way, and therefore know what I am talking about.....

erinsueburns

I say I use an app too.

Then I also go with my replace lists.

I replaced:

Pre packaged breads with breads I make myself...by hand.
breads in general with more veggies (still not enough but I no longer run screaming from them in terror).
McDonalds/Burger King/Sonic with food I cooked at home.
My largest plate servings with foods I weighed on a scale, and use a bowl to eat out of (a full bowl somehow seems more filling than a half empty plate)
my morning fake as hell coffee creamer with portion controlled real half and half, and then with protein powder and greek yogurt.
my prepackaged trail mixes with nuts from the baking aisle
my snickers and twix and butterfingers with extra dark chocolate
my low fat, low protein, high carb doctor prescribed diet with one full of healthy fats per recommendations of the Harvard School of Public Health.

Then if all else fails I say "I have consulted with the dragon in my garage."

CherokeeBabe

*Lose*

crazy4lulu

eat clean...... train dirty!!! that is all!!!

Nessiechickie

I sold my soul to the devil and return he made me SMEXY!

ndirish4life

I always say "I quite eating fast food and started working out." They can't believe it. I agree, people want the quick fix, then to go back to eating like slobs.

GBOGH_5

Wait until people start whispering about how you must be using cocaine.

It's a real blast to walk around rubbing your nose and sniffling a bunch when around those people.