Married men answer this.........
Replies
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Nah. We've learned how to ignore nagging. The only time we hear is when the TV is off.:laugh:Sounds like a lotta nagging going on at your houses. just sayin
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I don't really get this question. I'm not a married man, but I am a married woman. It comes down to "love and respect." If you don't love her then she disrespects you and vice versa. It is called the "crazy cycle." The only way to break it is to love her unconditionally even if she isn't doing her part in respecting you. As a woman, I can say that if you just love her regardless, she will highly likely have a change of heart and respect you. The same goes for the woman, if you are not loving her, she should still respect you, and hopefully you will have a change of heart and love her. The point is that the husband is to suppose to love his wife regardless, and the wife is supposed to respect her husband regardless. It is all about putting our pride aside and doing what we ought to do. I got this from the series, "Love and Respect." I think this is such a great series. Obviously, we should love and respect each other, but women often want to be loved, and men want to be respected.0
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In my experience, marriage is about give and take for both parties - or should be.
Happiness doesn't lie in getting what you want but giving unconditionally.
From the outside it may appear that I conform a lot, compromise a lot, but so does my wife. On closer inspection - many of our wants and needs are either the same or similar.
kind regards,
Ben0 -
You must not have kids yet.:laugh:To be fair, I am convinced that I conform 100% of the time.... but so is my husband. That can't be right. So we must both be compromising. :huh:
A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
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Been in fitness industry for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition0 -
Do you right or do you want to be happy? you can't have both
Pick your fights wisely most of em arent worth it.0 -
Lol, you get to stay away for at least 24 hours every once in awhile!:laugh:First of all "Know Thyself!"
If you haven't figured out who YOU are then stay single and alone until you do! Save yourself the trouble of failed relationships!
Then choose someone who is compatible with you! Takes Time, a lot of time, my wife and I dated for 6 years before getting engaged and another year before marriage.
Then, Conformity or Compromise does not figure in so heavily.
Just a thought!
A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
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Been in fitness industry for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition0 -
:laugh: The majority of married men wish this could really happen.:laugh:So let the small things go, they mean nothing in the long run
A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
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Been in fitness industry for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition0 -
I used to conform 90%+...then one day I changed that... now I have an ex-wife HAHAHA :laugh:
That's funny but there's a lot of truth to that. I'm in the same boat, got sick of compromising and taking it in the *kitten* all the time.
:laugh: The majority of married men wish this could really happen.:laugh:So let the small things go, they mean nothing in the long run
Unfortunately the small things can build up into bigger things over time. Sometimes certain small things can be worth talking about. It's better to talk about it when it's a pebble or small rock than when it's a boulder.0 -
thats why I am not married0
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Yeah, this is a dude's thing. Don't try to figure it out.:laugh:I don't really get this question. I'm not a married man
A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
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Been in fitness industry for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition0 -
Too much compromise or conformity can be damaging. .You get to a point where she doesn't respect you at all and you become a doormat. . Once she knows she can walk all over you, she loses interest in you. .
You have to pick your battles, but when you do. . you have to stick to your convictions and don't be beaten down. Once you don't feel like a man anymore. . she won't see you as a man anymore. .0 -
delete0
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Too much compromise or conformity can be damaging. .You get to a point where she doesn't respect you at all and you become a doormat. . Once she knows she can walk all over you, she loses interest in you. .
You have to pick your battles, but when you do. . you have to stick to your convictions and don't be beaten down. Once you don't feel like a man anymore. . she won't see you as a man anymore. .
^^^ This is why I'm Divorced. . ^^^0 -
QFT. This is all that matters really.i dont know what i do, but i always make sure she thinks she won.0 -
I used to conform 90%+...then one day I changed that... now I have an ex-wife HAHAHA :laugh:
That's funny but there's a lot of truth to that. I'm in the same boat, got sick of compromising and taking it in the *kitten* all the time.
:laugh: The majority of married men wish this could really happen.:laugh:So let the small things go, they mean nothing in the long run
Unfortunately the small things can build up into bigger things over time. Sometimes certain small things can be worth talking about. It's better to talk about it when it's a pebble or small rock than when it's a boulder.The point is that the husband is to suppose to love his wife regardless, and the wife is supposed to respect her husband regardless
That kinda sucks... Is it too much to ask for the same love in return from your wife. I don't want to be respected if I'm not loved, that's called a friendship not a marriage.0 -
I conform most of the time...
Happy wife, happy life...
When mama ain't happy then nobody is happy...0 -
We have an agreement. I don't try to run her life...and I don't try to run mine.
I get all my arguing out of my system at work (attorney); plus, I see what REAL problems are (family law); so when I get home, I pick up the Honeydew list (Honey, do this. Honey, do that), put my head down, and get to work. 0 -
We're both so laid back it's rarely an issue when it comes down to things we do. With things we disagree on (I tend to be more liberal and she the more conservative.) we give one another the benefit of the doubt. Fairly balanced I guess.0
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That's why the 90%-10% works for me.:laugh:Too much compromise or conformity can be damaging. .You get to a point where she doesn't respect you at all and you become a doormat. . Once she knows she can walk all over you, she loses interest in you. .
You have to pick your battles, but when you do. . you have to stick to your convictions and don't be beaten down. Once you don't feel like a man anymore. . she won't see you as a man anymore. .
A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
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Been in fitness industry for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition0 -
The toilet seat, cleaning the house, having sex......................that about covers it.:laugh:
I do it her way in her bathroom. I do it my way in mine (the cold one in the basement).
If I want the house clean - I should do it myself. But having kids around fixes this one for a couple decades.
We both take what we want when we want it.
Fair enough!
In our house - it would be nice if he would put the seat down. My 3 yr old son does. I'm sorry...but it's dirty and he doesn't clean it. As for the house, he doesn't clean. I would like him to take care of his crap, but that's a fight. His mother took good care of him, I guess. My son will not find that mother here. And what about sex? Where to have it? How to have it? We don't have issues there. Or at least not that I've heard of! 0 -
Truth be told it is a little strange in our marriage. I get my way most all the time and am spoiled. I wear the pants in our family. Unless of course it is something she feels really strongly about in which case she always wins, so at the end of the day maybe she wears the pants and just lets me think I do! Like someone else on here said there are "no hills to die on" in my marriage. I am damn lucky to have her and at the end of the day if she lays down the law well then I just have to roll with it.0
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Hey, I have that same list!!!:laugh:We have an agreement. I don't try to run her life...and I don't try to run mine.
I get all my arguing out of my system at work (attorney); plus, I see what REAL problems are (family law); so when I get home, I pick up the Honeydew list (Honey, do this. Honey, do that), put my head down, and get to work.
A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness industry for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition0 -
I used to conform 90%+...then one day I changed that... now I have an ex-wife HAHAHA :laugh:
That's funny but there's a lot of truth to that. I'm in the same boat, got sick of compromising and taking it in the *kitten* all the time.
:laugh: The majority of married men wish this could really happen.:laugh:So let the small things go, they mean nothing in the long run
Unfortunately the small things can build up into bigger things over time. Sometimes certain small things can be worth talking about. It's better to talk about it when it's a pebble or small rock than when it's a boulder.The point is that the husband is to suppose to love his wife regardless, and the wife is supposed to respect her husband regardless
That kinda sucks... Is it too much to ask for the same love in return from your wife. I don't want to be respected if I'm not loved, that's called a friendship not a marriage.
For women, it is natural for us to love our husbands, but it is difficult for us to respect. I would say that the "woman" would love you. I can't speak for all women though. Check out the "Love and Respect" series and decide what you think. 0 -
14 years of a very happy blissful marriage to my best and closest friend has taught me this: Think of her first and let her know you are thinking of her. Learn to win by losing. Don't be afraid to argue, but you may have to agree to disagree. Never be too big of a man to apologize. And lastly, love unconditionally the children she spent nine months carrying for you(wehave 11). I could go on all day but then you wouldn't have to buy my book...if I wrote it. :-)0
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[/quote]The point is that the husband is to suppose to love his wife regardless, and the wife is supposed to respect her husband regardless
That kinda sucks... Is it too much to ask for the same love in return from your wife. I don't want to be respected if I'm not loved, that's called a friendship not a marriage.
For women, it is natural for us to love our husbands, but it is difficult for us to respect. I would say that the "woman" would love you. I can't speak for all women though. Check out the "Love and Respect" series and decide what you think.
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I don't have a lot of time to read right now and I'm not big on reading books like that in general. I just can't focus for very long unless it's super-interesting. Could you give me the Reader's Digest version please?0 -
Yeah, I think women have us figured out.:laugh: The only problem I see is when they talk about problems with us, it's with their friends/acquaintances and NOT us.:laugh:so at the end of the day maybe she wears the pants and just lets me think I do! Like someone else on here said there are "no hills to die on" in my marriage. I am damn lucky to have her and at the end of the day if she lays down the law well then I just have to roll with it.
A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness industry for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition0 -
Exactly. A good match doesn't require sacrifice or compromise.First of all "Know Thyself!"
If you haven't figured out who YOU are then stay single and alone until you do! Save yourself the trouble of failed relationships!
Then choose someone who is compatible with you! Takes Time, a lot of time, my wife and I dated for 6 years before getting engaged and another year before marriage.
Then, Conformity or Compromise does not figure in so heavily.
Just a thought!0 -
Now this is a winner!14 years of a very happy blissful marriage to my best and closest friend has taught me this: Think of her first and let her know you are thinking of her. Learn to win by losing. Don't be afraid to argue, but you may have to agree to disagree. Never be too big of a man to apologize. And lastly, love unconditionally the children she spent nine months carrying for you(wehave 11). I could go on all day but then you wouldn't have to buy my book...if I wrote it. :-)
A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness industry for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition0 -
Oh noes! I wonder if my hunny is just letting me have my way and maybe he doesn't just think all my ideas are great. O.o
On second thought, I can live with that.0 -
My husband got me a tshirt that says "I may not always be right, but I am Never ever wrong".
Enought said? LOL,0
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