it's 2013, why are women playing mother to their husbands?

Options
1…1113151617

Replies

  • kristinlc88
    kristinlc88 Posts: 63 Member
    Options
    not to point out the obvious but a grown woman dipped in manic panic using the words Morgue and Babe in her name is ranting about men not acting mature. I'll just set this down right here for you to all stew over for a bit

    Ha!
  • MrsPong
    MrsPong Posts: 580 Member
    Options
    Yeah this definitely does not apply to me! My husband does the majority of the cooking and also does 50% of the cleaning. He also gives the kids baths every night so that I can have some quiet time for myself. Oh, and hes in the military on top of all that! I love that he's not like a lot of other Soldiers that we know and comes home, plays video games for 5 hours and won't help with the kids or around the house. Yep, I'm spoiled and I LOVE it!

    Jess I'm with you. I do alot of the cooking, I cook in advance for the day/week ahead. My husband is an active duty Marine, I work full time. We have 1 kid. My husband will come home for lunch, let our dog out, do a little cleaning, make himself lunch. He will give our daughter a bath most nights., does school work, helps clean, handles all Dr appts for her... We def. share the roles. It's how it should be, unless the mother/father stay home.
  • lizlkbg
    lizlkbg Posts: 566
    Options
    not to point out the obvious but a grown woman dipped in manic panic using the words Morgue and Babe in her name is ranting about men not acting mature. I'll just set this down right here for you to all stew over for a bit

    Shazzam!

    But maybe she is an undertaker? A hot undertaker?
  • HopefulLeigh
    HopefulLeigh Posts: 363 Member
    Options
    I do NOT understand.
    I get it if he works late, and you are home earlier or stay at home. What I DO NOT get is making two separate meals, or even more for kids. Eating healthy should be a great new plan for the whole family.

    You are not your husbands mother.


    Kids should learn early to enjoy and like healthy food; or it's a vicious cycle. They will have trouble liking them later in life.
    Try starting a husband who can't on something like this
    http://www.amazon.com/Paula-Deens-My-First-Cookbook/dp/1416950338/ref=sr_1_4?ie=UTF8&qid=1360038617&sr=8-4&keywords=my+first+cookbook
    or
    http://www.amazon.com/Man-Can-Plan-Great-Meals/dp/1579546072/ref=sr_1_2?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1360038663&sr=1-2&keywords=my+first+cookbook+microwave

    I'm sorry.

    1] You're not sorry or you wouldn't have said it. Let's just go ahead and get that out of the way.

    2] Paula Deen cookbooks are not "healthier eating", so I'm really not sure where you were going with that.

    3] You're right, I'm NOT my husband's mother. That's why I can't FORCE him to eat the way I'm choosing to eat. I happen to enjoy broccoli. He doesn't. He happens to enjoy potatoes. I don't. I'd be livid if he tried telling me that because he cooked a gob of meat and a enormous pot of potatoes, I HAVE to eat it. It's out of respect for him that I don't do that with broccoli.

    4] As for children, until you've had a child with texture sensitivities, you're not going to get why people will cook something separate for their children. The fact is that beyond that, I know what my toddler has eaten for the day and what nutrients she still needs. I know what meat she just can't eat. I know that if I hand her that plate of sweet potatoes, broccoli and chicken, she's going to eat the sweet potatoes, chew the chicken up a little bit and then spit it on the floor and throw the broccoli at the cats, who will then proceed to attempt to eat it and up chuck it EVERYWHERE later.

    So basically what I'm saying is that you haven't the foggiest idea what you're talking about in regards to any family but your own and you can take your judgmental crap and eat it with your Paula Deen dinners. =)
  • _SusieQ_
    _SusieQ_ Posts: 2,964 Member
    Options

    Every marriage has its own "roles", if it doesn't match yours it doesn't mean it is bad.

    This should be the end of the thread.
  • sullus
    sullus Posts: 2,839 Member
    Options
    When my wife didnt work, you're gosh-darned right I expected to come home to a clean house and a hot meal on the table. Now that the financial realities have changed, and she works full time too, she expects ME to have a hot meal on the table when she gets home (I get home at 430, her 6:00), and I do. And we hired a cleaning service.

    But this cooking 2 meals thing? neither of us would ever consider it. If you don;t like dinner, there's cereal in the cabinet. Or cook yourself something. Now someone has 2 days of leftover lunches instead of 1. no big deal.
  • WhoTheHellIsBen
    WhoTheHellIsBen Posts: 1,238 Member
    Options
    not to point out the obvious but a grown woman dipped in manic panic using the words Morgue and Babe in her name is ranting about men not acting mature. I'll just set this down right here for you to all stew over for a bit

    Shazzam!

    But maybe she is an undertaker? A hot undertaker?
    uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuh..............................sure, why not
  • mwalker73
    mwalker73 Posts: 29
    Options
    This is why I dislike feminists. If you ladies want to fix the cars, take out the garbage and do all the other "traditional man" roles while your husband does the cooking and cleaning... that's your decision. But you don't have the right to call marriages where the couple enjoy traditional roles a mother/child relationship. There is absolutely nothing child like about my husband.

    We have been together since high school (24 years) and have a wonderful marriage. I do the cooking, cleaning, etc. while he does the dirty stuff and heavy lifting. If i even attempt to take out the garbage he's all over it. He owns his own company and i do the bookwork from home. It amounts to about 20 hours a week of paperwork... I spend the rest of my time keeping a nice home for him and am happy to do it because it makes him happy. Just as he is happy to work long hours doing physically demanding labour to make sure he can give me and our daughters everything we could possibly need. He is very proud to say that he takes good care of his family financially (university tuition for our daughters and a very comfortable life style). That makes him feel good, just as it makes me feel good to keep our home nice and hubby fed. He doesn't know how to cook and I don't know how to change a breaker in the electrical panel or fix the furnace. That's why we have each other.

    I think relationships where each person cares about the others happiness above their own are the ones that last. It makes no difference how you go about getting there and how the division of labour is done. Selfishness is what kills relationships. Perhaps if women (and men) asked themselves what they could do for their partner each day to make them happy, instead of taking foolish stands on principle, the divorce rate wouldn't be so high.

    Bravo! Excellent post!

    Don't generalize all feminists! True feminism is about choice. As a woman you are empowered to be a SAHM, a mechanic, a professor and a stripper. You have the right to choose. Any woman looking down her nose at another because of her choices is not a feminist, she's just an arrogant B****.
  • sullus
    sullus Posts: 2,839 Member
    Options
    I found this post very offensive. I allow my wife to pick what she'll be cooking for me, almost 1/2 the time. I give her three warnings for any mistakes she makes before I deduct from her allowance. When we go out in public, I give her two, sometimes even three options to pick from before she dresses. When she's not feeling well, I let her off from her chores for up to 24 hours (granted she has a doctor's note).

    The OP makes no sense to me, either her home lacks the structure I have put into my home or she doesn't have a reasonable husband like myself.

    I like the cut of your jib, sailor. Um, could you do me a favor and give me her phone number so that when she pulls a burning bed on you, I can give her a call and console the lovely widow?
  • mrs_schultz2012
    mrs_schultz2012 Posts: 395 Member
    Options
    I love taking care of my husband and the house...I love cooking and cleaning and feel accomplished, and he appreciates everything I do for him, he always says thank you. I appreciate everything he does for me as well. He is perfectly capable of making a great meal, but normally I beat him to it, because I like doing things for him! Same with working on the car...YES, I can change my own oil and rotate the tires, but he does it for me so he can take care of me the same way I take care of him. Equal partnership...I wouldn't say I am "playing mother" to him by any means
  • HollyHobbitToes
    HollyHobbitToes Posts: 131 Member
    Options
    We have pretty equal responsibilities in my house....we both have pretty crappy jobs and don't make much money but make up for it at home with equality....but in all honesty....I get lazy very quick and feel there are more important things in life than housework and laundry....he feels the same way....we often pick up the slack for the other....like he does laundry if I haven't had time..he cooks (not always healthy but I appreciate the effort) and does dishes too....easier for him than some perhaps because he was used to being on his own and taking care of himself before we got together...I probably out score him on the childcare but that is just because I am home all the time and he works outside the home....

    All that said, I don't think there are any set rules about who is responsible for what in relationships....every couple is different and comfortable with different roles....I don't mind dragging the garbage out to the curb if he happens to forget once in awhile just as he doesn't mind washing his own work clothes if I haven't had time for laundry....we tease each other about it and laugh....it's a healthy relationship no matter what "jobs" we have around the house :)
  • WhoTheHellIsBen
    WhoTheHellIsBen Posts: 1,238 Member
    Options
    I found this post very offensive. I allow my wife to pick what she'll be cooking for me, almost 1/2 the time. I give her three warnings for any mistakes she makes before I deduct from her allowance. When we go out in public, I give her two, sometimes even three options to pick from before she dresses. When she's not feeling well, I let her off from her chores for up to 24 hours (granted she has a doctor's note).

    The OP makes no sense to me, either her home lacks the structure I have put into my home or she doesn't have a reasonable husband like myself.
    :drinker:
  • HopefulLeigh
    HopefulLeigh Posts: 363 Member
    Options
    I found this post very offensive. I allow my wife to pick what she'll be cooking for me, almost 1/2 the time. I give her three warnings for any mistakes she makes before I deduct from her allowance. When we go out in public, I give her two, sometimes even three options to pick from before she dresses. When she's not feeling well, I let her off from her chores for up to 24 hours (granted she has a doctor's note).

    The OP makes no sense to me, either her home lacks the structure I have put into my home or she doesn't have a reasonable husband like myself.
    :blushing: If only my husband were so reasonable. I'll have to let him read this later.
  • mrs_schultz2012
    mrs_schultz2012 Posts: 395 Member
    Options
    I found this post very offensive. I allow my wife to pick what she'll be cooking for me, almost 1/2 the time. I give her three warnings for any mistakes she makes before I deduct from her allowance. When we go out in public, I give her two, sometimes even three options to pick from before she dresses. When she's not feeling well, I let her off from her chores for up to 24 hours (granted she has a doctor's note).

    The OP makes no sense to me, either her home lacks the structure I have put into my home or she doesn't have a reasonable husband like myself.
    :drinker:

    love it hahaha
  • WendyTerry420
    WendyTerry420 Posts: 13,274 Member
    Options
    2] Paula Deen cookbooks are not "healthier eating", so I'm really not sure where you were going with that.

    Paula Deen is awesome! She is one of my favorites!
  • sullus
    sullus Posts: 2,839 Member
    Options
    2] Paula Deen cookbooks are not "healthier eating", so I'm really not sure where you were going with that.

    Paula Deen is awesome! She is one of my favorites!

    Less than healthy, but ohhhh so goood .. http://www.pauladeen.com/recipes/view2/bacon_cheeseburger_meatloaf/
  • porkchop_13
    porkchop_13 Posts: 122
    Options
    my husband and I cook separate meals almost every night. No big deal
  • osualex
    osualex Posts: 409 Member
    Options
    To each their own. If my husband didn't cook but took care of other things, I wouldn't mind.

    However, I find it hard to believe that anyone "can't" cook. It is a basic life skill. I can understand not being great at it or not liking it, but seriously...the internet exists. Anyone who can read can follow a recipe.
  • Dani_Davies23
    Dani_Davies23 Posts: 86
    Options
    Get ready to get your minds blown here.....
    My wife cooks me dinner every night and packs me breakfast and lunch.
    She cooks.
    I do the dishes.
    We clean the entire house every two weeks, alternating the person.
    Works for us.

    Then again...I wouldn't know the first thing about gender roles.
  • larryfolkner
    larryfolkner Posts: 7
    Options
    It's either I cook the healthy **** or he cooks two packs of ramen with 2 sliced hotdogs in it and 4 slices of processed cheese.

    Plus, I love cooking, so I don't mind. Maybe every ones relationship isn't exactly like yours, or the way you think it should be.

    Calm down.

    Yumm. I wanna come over for dinner. Love me some ramen

Categories