How many 5 year olds could you take in a fight?

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12346

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  • Jonesingmucho
    Jonesingmucho Posts: 4,902 Member
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    According the the website, I can only take down 12 of them. My height, lack of experience with martial arts, trampling, swarms, fighting, plus my general humanity and reticence to fight children is working against me.

    However, the website, after calculating my abysmal score, linked me to a dating website where I assume I can find a killing machine to protect me from the 5 yr olds and zombies. x starts completing dating site questionaire x

    Question #1 What are you looking for in a companion? I'm looking for a killing machine to protect me from 5 yr olds and zombies....

    This should be good... roflmao
  • BrainsOnGains
    BrainsOnGains Posts: 282 Member
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    can I use 5 year olds as weapons?
  • Jersey_Devil
    Jersey_Devil Posts: 4,142 Member
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    sounds like a scene out of Kill Bill

    tumblr_lxa4s3PcRS1qgeyd8o1_500.gif
  • Cr01502
    Cr01502 Posts: 3,614 Member
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    I do muy thai twice a week.

    I go to the little kid classes just so I can smack them around.

    Probably about 20
  • Rodamort
    Rodamort Posts: 171 Member
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    21!!! Not a bad count. Having 4 kids myself and then when we get together with a few of our close friends and their families there is anywhere from 11-15 kids under the age of 12. I've taken most of them on. I'm sure I can handle 21, 5 year olds. :)
  • 2muchsauce
    2muchsauce Posts: 1,078
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    Anyone claiming more than 2 haven't met my boys :devil: lol
  • wannabtight
    wannabtight Posts: 187 Member
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    Depends on the personality of the the 5 year old, I would not mess with more than one of my 5 year older she is strong and tough and taken on her oldest siblings! She's not afraid to take any of them on! She was tackled at school and bit the other child in the face. Her older bother was teasing her and she cracked him in the head with an instrument, I gave her a little swat on the button when she was younger and she just looked at me and swatted me right back. She has a don't mess with me personality and scares me sometimes! At least I know she can hold her own but I absolutely dread getting calls from her Kinder teacher. Luckily she has remorse.

    you should probably hold her head under water for about 30-45 seconds to re-establish who the boss is




    I could try that with my soon to be 5 yr old whom is much like described above , but then again she can hold her breath pretty long and think its ok to swim in the tub. I tell her I'm mad at her and to go away and shes instantly sweet and innocent and remembers I'm the head honcho in this house !
    My gal is a great swimmer as well! She thinks she is boss cause she knows I can't lift her to put her in her room, as of yet! She really likes to push us to the limits and when her dad gets her in her room she screams. Things were so different when I was growing up! I got some real good spanking if I acted like that and now you would get charged with child abuse if you did that to your children now!
  • crazy4lulu
    crazy4lulu Posts: 822 Member
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    an endless supply of duct tape... bring on the 5 year olds!!!!
  • darkguardian419
    darkguardian419 Posts: 1,302 Member
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    It depends on the types of kids, just like a zombie apocalypse chat.

    Another way to say it is... are these '30 days' "zombies" or are these typical "shamblers"?

    ETA: 30 days, I could take out probably 4-5 of the "30 days" kids... concerted effort to take me down I'd still get a few good kicks and swings in

    typical 5 year olds without any planning, just an "attack!" mentality, I'd take out a few dozen before I got too tired I think.
  • scarywordlikediet
    scarywordlikediet Posts: 91 Member
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    If they come at me one at a time, It will be similar to a zombie survival scenario...and I may last years. If they all come at me at once, I will likely be overtaken in 21.8 minutes.

    21.8...lol...i love the .8
    That was funny.

    I am a mom of 2 boys, 9 and 14. When they were 5, nothing hurt them. I think I will take my loss from the sideline and cheer the 5 year olds on....GO KIDS!!!
  • Jerrypeoples
    Jerrypeoples Posts: 1,541 Member
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    you should probably hold her head under water for about 30-45 seconds to re-establish who the boss is




    I could try that with my soon to be 5 yr old whom is much like described above , but then again she can hold her breath pretty long and think its ok to swim in the tub. I tell her I'm mad at her and to go away and shes instantly sweet and innocent and remembers I'm the head honcho in this house !
    My gal is a great swimmer as well! She thinks she is boss cause she knows I can't lift her to put her in her room, as of yet! She really likes to push us to the limits and when her dad gets her in her room she screams. Things were so different when I was growing up! I got some real good spanking if I acted like that and now you would get charged with child abuse if you did that to your children now!

    punch them right in the liver, itll knock their breath out as well as make them vomit
  • serena569
    serena569 Posts: 427 Member
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    Still none. Work has the site blocked. Something about violence....
  • mikey1976
    mikey1976 Posts: 1,005 Member
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    1 maybe then the screaming would drive me up the wall. so i would have to cover my ears lol
  • conorpatmanCHANGED
    conorpatmanCHANGED Posts: 253 Member
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    hmmm maybe 3
  • fara180
    fara180 Posts: 1,260 Member
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    i make a living this way! i can handle about 12 five year olds before it gets cray.
  • matt2442
    matt2442 Posts: 1,259 Member
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    sounds like a scene out of Kill Bill

    tumblr_lxa4s3PcRS1qgeyd8o1_500.gif

    hahaha! this was the first thing i thought of too
  • kdeaux1959
    kdeaux1959 Posts: 2,675 Member
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    really???? LOL>
  • CherokeeBabe
    CherokeeBabe Posts: 1,704 Member
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    Hmmm...

    Would I rather fight 100 duck-sized 5-year olds...

    Or One 5-year old-sized Duck....

    Hmmmmm....
  • whierd
    whierd Posts: 14,026 Member
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    Hmmm...

    Would I rather fight 100 duck-sized 5-year olds...

    Or One 5-year old-sized Duck....

    Hmmmmm....

    The one duck, duh!! Eventually the 5 year olds will wear you out.
  • tj1376
    tj1376 Posts: 1,402 Member
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    None - viscous little monsters always go for the knees. Once your down, its all over.