Morbidly Obese mother files complaint

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Replies

  • oh_em_gee
    oh_em_gee Posts: 887 Member
    I think he has the right to refuse to treat her. However, he shouldn't have lied about it being hospital policy.

    This. If a doctor doesn't feel comfortable treating me, I don't want them treating me. But, he shouldn't have lied.
  • my2kin04
    my2kin04 Posts: 69 Member
    He probably told her it was hospital policy in an attempt to not embarrass her. But, no matter how hard you try you just cannot please everyone. So he should have just said what he needed to say, regardless.
    I believe the Doctor was in the right in this situation.
  • jr1985
    jr1985 Posts: 1,033 Member
    Should he have told her that it was hospital policy if it wasn't?... no

    Should she have wanted to do what would be the safest option for her, and her baby?... Yes

    This whole situation could have been avoided if he had just told her that while they would certainly do the best that they could to make sure that her and her baby had the safest delivery, and recovery, but that he felt like the other hospital was better equipped her particular situation, and that he knew she would want to give her child the best fighting chance.

    You can generally gladly get people to do what you want them to do as long as you convince them the it was either their idea in the first place, or that it really is in their best interest...
  • KellyDeitrick
    KellyDeitrick Posts: 76 Member
    I think maybe the doctor should not have said it was policy since it wasn't.

    However, he could have said the same thing and made it all about the baby. We have a great medical staff here at hospital xyz,..however, I feel that the well being and safety of you and the baby that the hospital in Indy xyz will offer better equipment, experience and emergency care if the need should arise. I feel that it is my due diligence to provide you and the baby the best care and the hospital in Indy would be it. Be honest that due to her weight there are a myriad of health risks that his hospital is not equipped to handle. It is being honest without stating a non existent policy.

    Also, the mother should have more concern for her baby at this point to get the best care. She really has not right to complain about being discriminated against, the doctor was trying to make sure she and the baby stayed safe.

    Just my opinion.
  • fbmandy55
    fbmandy55 Posts: 5,263 Member
    At my highest weight, 357, I was healthy. Granted, I was too heavy, but my numbers were just fine. My blood pressure, heart rate, cholesterol, blood sugar, thyroid, triglycerides, etc were all within normal levels. No diabetes. No high blood pressure. None of the issues many obese people have. Doctors were usually pretty shocked.

    My point is, you can't assume she isn't healthy just because of her weight. If she's speaking in terms of bloodwork alone, she may be right. On paper, I was perfectly healthy (if you ignored my BMI). Still am. I've lost 54 pounds, and I'm sure my numbers are about the same or better. Am I a healthy weight? Heck no. Am I healthy, generally? Yes.

    I don't think it's right that he lied to her. He should have explained her options. He took the chicken way out of it, and that's wrong.

    I have to call BS on this. I have never had problems with my BP, I have never had problems with my cholesterol, diabetes or anything like that either. But just because those vital stats are ok does not mean you are healthy. At 260 pounds, all my stats were good too, but it made me sick to my stomach to walk for 20 minutes. It took me losing 50lbs to realize how unhealthy I actually was and how much potential I was lacking physically. Denial is a horrible thing.
  • oh_em_gee
    oh_em_gee Posts: 887 Member
    I would happily drive a little further for better care. Our local hospital happens to have great neonatal care (not that I'll need that any time soon) but if it were about mine and my baby's health, I can't see complaining about a drive. I'd give anything to have a healthy baby.
  • rmh1262
    rmh1262 Posts: 10 Member
    Not know the whole story as to why the doctor felt a need to lie, or what her potential risks are to herself and the unborn child leaves it open to decide either way. Personally if a doctor did not want to deliver my child, I'd be more than happy to look elsewhere. She's not considering the benefits of better neonatal care by complaining. Admit your have certain health risks when morbidly obese. Take the blame for the situation, lose some weight even while pregnant, thank God you are given a safer alternative and keep it moving!
  • SoViLicious
    SoViLicious Posts: 2,633 Member
    When I was pregnant with my daughter I had to travel to another town for my sonograms because they needed a more high-tech machine. I had gestational diabetes and was high risk. When it comes to my unborn child, I don't mess around. If they need to fly me to China to make sure my child is healthy do that shiz! She just got her feelings hurt.
  • kennethmgreen
    kennethmgreen Posts: 1,759 Member
    She also stated that she delivered 4 years ago when she was heavier and that her sister delivered at over 350 pounds as well.

    My first thought is how can these women be so fertile being150-200lbs overweight? Also that they are pushing the fat acceptance and claiming discriminiation. They don't act embarrassed but more proud of their weigtht .

    I am still obese and I have no plan to get pregnant until I am healthier and think it's sad the this lady is placing the blame of HER problems on the doctors. I am sure it will end in a lawsuit and the doctor having to settle with her. I don't know why he lied but if it were me, I think that may have been the easiest way to tell her. When I have to give someone an answer they won't like at work I always say "it's board policy", knowing that they will back me up on my decisions.

    I just can't get over the woman telling me she was healthy at 353lbs....
    OP started as if this was a discussion of a local news story, but later in the post referred to "the mother told me..." Follow up post states "I just can't get over the woman telling me she was healthy at 353lbs.... "

    Is this someone you know and/or are providing care to? Post above sounds like a first person account. Has the woman in question been speaking to you?

    You have already stated that "these women" are "pushing fat acceptance and claiming discrimination." I know that there may be some discussion her about doctor choices, doctor responsibility, liability issues, etc. But I can't help but feel a little baited into a discussion about your feelings around "fat acceptance."

    Is that what you intended?
  • UsedToBeHusky
    UsedToBeHusky Posts: 15,228 Member
    At my highest weight, 357, I was healthy. Granted, I was too heavy, but my numbers were just fine. My blood pressure, heart rate, cholesterol, blood sugar, thyroid, triglycerides, etc were all within normal levels. No diabetes. No high blood pressure. None of the issues many obese people have. Doctors were usually pretty shocked.

    My point is, you can't assume she isn't healthy just because of her weight. If she's speaking in terms of bloodwork alone, she may be right. On paper, I was perfectly healthy (if you ignored my BMI). Still am. I've lost 54 pounds, and I'm sure my numbers are about the same or better. Am I a healthy weight? Heck no. Am I healthy, generally? Yes.

    I don't think it's right that he lied to her. He should have explained her options. He took the chicken way out of it, and that's wrong.

    I have to call BS on this. I have never had problems with my BP, I have never had problems with my cholesterol, diabetes or anything like that either. But just because those vital stats are ok does not mean you are healthy. At 260 pounds, all my stats were good too, but it made me sick to my stomach to walk for 20 minutes. It took me losing 50lbs to realize how unhealthy I actually was and how much potential I was lacking physically. Denial is a horrible thing.

    Physical conditioning doesn't exactly define health either.
  • UsedToBeHusky
    UsedToBeHusky Posts: 15,228 Member
    You have already stated that "these women" are "pushing fat acceptance and claiming discrimination." I know that there may be some discussion her about doctor choices, doctor responsibility, liability issues, etc. But I can't help but feel a little baited into a discussion about your feelings around "fat acceptance."

    Is that what you intended?

    This. ^^^
  • edge_dragoncaller
    edge_dragoncaller Posts: 826 Member
    Yes, he was wrong for lying about hospital policy, and that is why she will get paid. Should have just been honest.

    On the same token though, his reason was right as well. He wanted her to go to a hospital that would provide better care during the birth and after, but that's what he should have said.
  • mish3131
    mish3131 Posts: 276 Member
    The Dr. was wrong in saying it was the policy of the hospital if it was not. As for the other stuff, it sounds like the doctor was just trying to get her to go where it would be best for the delivery. If he didn't say/do anything and something went wrong he would be questioned also "Why didn't you tell me there was some other hospital that can better deal with my health issues?" types of questions.

    She should be less worried about what her doc said and more concerned with the child and her self being in a safe environment.
  • ArroganceInStep
    ArroganceInStep Posts: 6,239 Member
    At my highest weight, 357, I was healthy. Granted, I was too heavy, but my numbers were just fine. My blood pressure, heart rate, cholesterol, blood sugar, thyroid, triglycerides, etc were all within normal levels. No diabetes. No high blood pressure. None of the issues many obese people have. Doctors were usually pretty shocked.

    My point is, you can't assume she isn't healthy just because of her weight. If she's speaking in terms of bloodwork alone, she may be right. On paper, I was perfectly healthy (if you ignored my BMI). Still am. I've lost 54 pounds, and I'm sure my numbers are about the same or better. Am I a healthy weight? Heck no. Am I healthy, generally? Yes.

    I don't think it's right that he lied to her. He should have explained her options. He took the chicken way out of it, and that's wrong.

    Health is a hard thing to quantify. Your bloodwork can come back great...when you need chemo. I don't think 350+ should be considered healthy because of all the elevated risks of stuff. I suppose it's a semantics thing, but that's a line I would draw under my definition of healthy (and I say that having once been nearly 350).
  • MeanSophieCat
    MeanSophieCat Posts: 200 Member
    Maybe being obese wasn't specifically listed in the policy but all doctors have a "high risk" pregnancy policy. If they determine you are high-risk, which can be a huge range of factors, they typically refer you to a specialist and a hospital equipped for high risk deliveries.

    My doc has this policy for multiples, Type 1 diabetes, confirmed healthy issues with the baby and a whole load of other things.

    My sis, who has Type 1 diabetes, will have to have an OB and hospital 45+ minutes from her house. She lives in a relatively rural area where the local hospitals/docs are not equipped to deal with her pregnancy. She didn't even flinch at it. She wants the best care for her and her baby.
  • imhungry2012
    imhungry2012 Posts: 240 Member
    Imagine something terrible happend when the child was born,that could have been prevented, and the doctor had not advised her to delivery in the hospital? That would be tragic and likely cause a whole different type of complaint! I have to imagine the doctor was thinking of the mother as well as the unborn child...I don't think it's fair to call it discrimination.
  • AlsDonkBoxSquat
    AlsDonkBoxSquat Posts: 6,128 Member
    You have already stated that "these women" are "pushing fat acceptance and claiming discrimination." I know that there may be some discussion her about doctor choices, doctor responsibility, liability issues, etc. But I can't help but feel a little baited into a discussion about your feelings around "fat acceptance."

    Is that what you intended?

    This. ^^^

    Agreed, I'd feel better about this discussion if it were 1) clear as to whether or not the OP knows the woman personally . . . particularly if you are a person providing a level of care I would think that this discussion here is inappropriate and 2) if we would stay a little closer to topic. I don't see how these women are pushing some sort of political or social agenda . . . it seems pretty cut and dry that she wanted to deliver in the hospital closest to her (normal), she had a plan on how her pregnancy and delivery would go (normal), the doctor referred her to another hospital under circumstances that are hearsay (did they really say hospital policy, or did she hear hospital policy when they stated something else) which disappointed her (disappointment part = normal), she contact the hospital to verify (normal), found out that it wasn't policy at which point we start going down hill. I see no social or political agenda, just a woman who feels (right or wrong) lied to and somehow came to discuss the situation with the local news.
  • At my highest weight, 357, I was healthy. Granted, I was too heavy, but my numbers were just fine. My blood pressure, heart rate, cholesterol, blood sugar, thyroid, triglycerides, etc were all within normal levels. No diabetes. No high blood pressure. None of the issues many obese people have. Doctors were usually pretty shocked.

    My point is, you can't assume she isn't healthy just because of her weight. If she's speaking in terms of bloodwork alone, she may be right. On paper, I was perfectly healthy (if you ignored my BMI). Still am. I've lost 54 pounds, and I'm sure my numbers are about the same or better. Am I a healthy weight? Heck no. Am I healthy, generally? Yes.

    I don't think it's right that he lied to her. He should have explained her options. He took the chicken way out of it, and that's wrong.

    I have to call BS on this. I have never had problems with my BP, I have never had problems with my cholesterol, diabetes or anything like that either. But just because those vital stats are ok does not mean you are healthy. At 260 pounds, all my stats were good too, but it made me sick to my stomach to walk for 20 minutes. It took me losing 50lbs to realize how unhealthy I actually was and how much potential I was lacking physically. Denial is a horrible thing.

    I have to call BS on you, dear. I currently weigh close to 300lbs. I am also pregnant. My blood pressure was taken yesterday and was 101/70. All of my stats are awesome. I can RUN up and down stairs no problem. I can EASILY walk more than 20 minutes. With no pain. And I do. All of the time. In the summer I walk around the small lake near our house 1-2 times per week and that is a 4 mile walk and I do it in a little over an hour. I have a close friend who just had a baby last year and she in in the healthy weight range. She had super high blood pressure and had to be put on bed rest for a month and induced three weeks early. Health is relative. It depends much more on genetics, how much you move your body, and what you put into it... than what you weigh. I am not saying that I am "healthy" because I know that carrying around the extra weight puts a strain on my body. Which is why I am here and working on it. But dont sit in your smug little corner and pick at those around you. I dont know why you even posted this? Does it make you feel superior? It shouldn't.
  • fbmandy55
    fbmandy55 Posts: 5,263 Member
    She also stated that she delivered 4 years ago when she was heavier and that her sister delivered at over 350 pounds as well.

    My first thought is how can these women be so fertile being150-200lbs overweight? Also that they are pushing the fat acceptance and claiming discriminiation. They don't act embarrassed but more proud of their weigtht .

    I am still obese and I have no plan to get pregnant until I am healthier and think it's sad the this lady is placing the blame of HER problems on the doctors. I am sure it will end in a lawsuit and the doctor having to settle with her. I don't know why he lied but if it were me, I think that may have been the easiest way to tell her. When I have to give someone an answer they won't like at work I always say "it's board policy", knowing that they will back me up on my decisions.

    I just can't get over the woman telling me she was healthy at 353lbs....
    OP started as if this was a discussion of a local news story, but later in the post referred to "the mother told me..." Follow up post states "I just can't get over the woman telling me she was healthy at 353lbs.... "

    Is this someone you know and/or are providing care to? Post above sounds like a first person account. Has the woman in question been speaking to you?

    You have already stated that "these women" are "pushing fat acceptance and claiming discrimination." I know that there may be some discussion her about doctor choices, doctor responsibility, liability issues, etc. But I can't help but feel a little baited into a discussion about your feelings around "fat acceptance."

    Is that what you intended?

    To clarify. It started as an article posted on the news, which I posted in the the OP so people wouldn't feel baited with my opinions or comments. The woman went on the newsfacebook page and posted additional comments. She and I have had civil exchanges.

    Yes, the whole point of this is fat acceptance. As the article states, she went to the media so other overweight women wouldn't have to be treated the same as her.
  • Vailara
    Vailara Posts: 2,472 Member
    Sorry, double post!
  • anewlife4me8610
    anewlife4me8610 Posts: 91 Member
    Personally, I am over 400 lbs, and I know every time I have a medical issue, the Dr almost always doesn't even get an examination, They just say, its your weight....that is a hard pill to swallow, but so was the countless calories I ate to get here.
    I get annoyed as a big person when I see women and men wanting to be consoled or accommodated for being overweight.
    Yes there are medical conditions that cause weight gain, but for the most part it unhealthy lifestyle, overeating, and poor eating choices.
    I have been on several different weight loss plans and failed them all...I am a food addict, just as addicted to food as a person who is addicted to drugs or alcohol... and just as I feel about people leaning on their drug of choice as a crutch, like with drug addicts who collect social security because they fried there brain and or are accustomed to getting something for nothing, I feel that people who are on SSI because they are not disciplined enough to lose some weight so they can move, are both equally disgusting.
    While I struggle with my weight, I don't condone my lapses in binging and I take full responsibility for my eating actions, after all, its me who buys it, me who makes it and me who eats it....
    in short, I say, How dare the individual who makes a mockery out of their own mistakes. and how dare this woman make an issue of her own self destruction....If she were to deliver that baby, and god forbid, the baby have any problems or she have any problems due to her weight, she would no doubt sue the hospital for negligence.
    I am sorry but I don't think her complainants are valid or worthy of any time or publicity
  • Vailara
    Vailara Posts: 2,472 Member
    Incidentally, it's funny that almost everybody is referring to the doctor as "he" even though s/he's referred to as "she" in the article!
  • Alex_is_Hawks
    Alex_is_Hawks Posts: 3,499 Member
    So here locally, a morbidly obese mother to be has filed a complaint with a hospital after a doctor told her that at her weight, 353lbs, she would need to deliver in hospital in Indianapolis. She also contacted the news stating that they were discriminating against her because of her weight. The doctor told her it was policy of the hospital, which it isn't, but the hospital he asked her to deliver in has better neonatal care.

    http://www.wlfi.com/dpp/news/local/woman-says-doctor-lied-about-hospital-policy

    In my opinion, the doctor obviously doesn't feel comfortable with the situation or doesn't want to be liable if there is a delivery problem. The fact is, a morbidly obsese mother is 3 times more likely to have a stillbirth, has greater C-section complications at risk and just the problems she is setting her child up for are disturbing: not enough nutrients, risk of asthma and more likely to face childhood obesity.

    The mother told me that she had no health problems..... Ok, I was once in denial about how healthy I was at 260lbs, let alone 353lbs. There comes a time when you need to stop kidding yourself and realize that 353lbs in NOT healthy. Sadly, she will probably make some money off of this issue.

    What do you think? Was the doctor wrong for saying it was hospital policy? Does this mother have the right to be mad or is she being a drama queen?

    he shouldn't have lied about it being policy when it wasn't.

    but he should have said, I fear for your health and the babies health and I do not want to deliver this baby as I feel it's out of my scope of experience. I'm sending you to a hospital that should have more experience as it's bigger and has a wider demographic.

    there is NOTHING wrong with a doctor saying this is out of my scope and I want you to have the best care.
  • AlsDonkBoxSquat
    AlsDonkBoxSquat Posts: 6,128 Member
    At my highest weight, 357, I was healthy. Granted, I was too heavy, but my numbers were just fine. My blood pressure, heart rate, cholesterol, blood sugar, thyroid, triglycerides, etc were all within normal levels. No diabetes. No high blood pressure. None of the issues many obese people have. Doctors were usually pretty shocked.

    My point is, you can't assume she isn't healthy just because of her weight. If she's speaking in terms of bloodwork alone, she may be right. On paper, I was perfectly healthy (if you ignored my BMI). Still am. I've lost 54 pounds, and I'm sure my numbers are about the same or better. Am I a healthy weight? Heck no. Am I healthy, generally? Yes.

    I don't think it's right that he lied to her. He should have explained her options. He took the chicken way out of it, and that's wrong.

    Health is a hard thing to quantify. Your bloodwork can come back great...when you need chemo. I don't think 350+ should be considered healthy because of all the elevated risks of stuff. I suppose it's a semantics thing, but that's a line I would draw under my definition of healthy (and I say that having once been nearly 350).

    Besides, a high risk pregnancy isn't just based on whether or not health problems present themselves, but on the risk factors . . . very different things. Maybe the statistics are unreliable, but maybe they are very reliable. When you're talking about risk factors realted to health, well there's a whole industry with specialists trained specifically to calculate the risks associated with the medical field. They collect data, crunch the numbers, and assign risk rating . . . they aren't associated with the patients they just sit objectively in a room and apply the actuarial analytics.
  • SoDamnHungry
    SoDamnHungry Posts: 6,998 Member
    He shouldn't have lied and said it was hospital policy. Everything else he suggested seem pretty valid, though. If there's a hospital better equipped, she should go there since it will increase the likelihood of her child and her coming out ok.
  • weightedfootsteps
    weightedfootsteps Posts: 4,349 Member
    My opinion is that the doctor should have just plainly said:

    I'm sorry Mrs./Ms. xxxxxx I don't feel that I am qualified to help you deliver your child. I don't have enough experience with pregnancy in women of your caliber. There is a very qualified doctor that I know has the experience to deliver your child as safely as humanly possible. Here is his number and a referral sheet. I'm very sorry that I could not help you.

    Tada!! End of story.
  • vim_n_vigor
    vim_n_vigor Posts: 4,089 Member
    I am on my third pregnancy. I started at the same overweight number each time for each child (I am worried about when I hit that weight again!). I had different doctors for each pregnancy. I had one doctor that shamed me every visit for my entire pregnancy. He couldn't refer me to another hospital since the one I was going to had the second highest level neonatal care in the region and the number one hospital was literally across the street. I don't know her or the doctor, but if she was in the situation where her doctor was just a jerk about it over and over, then yes, she has valid reason to be very upset - maybe not to sue. if it was just a doctor advising her on a safer way to have her baby, she needs to just get over it. Someone shouldn't be treated poorly by a doctor because of weight, but they shouldn't expect the doctor to lie and sugarcoat it either.
  • JUDDDing
    JUDDDing Posts: 1,367 Member
    in women of your caliber.

    :)
  • fbmandy55
    fbmandy55 Posts: 5,263 Member
    At my highest weight, 357, I was healthy. Granted, I was too heavy, but my numbers were just fine. My blood pressure, heart rate, cholesterol, blood sugar, thyroid, triglycerides, etc were all within normal levels. No diabetes. No high blood pressure. None of the issues many obese people have. Doctors were usually pretty shocked.

    My point is, you can't assume she isn't healthy just because of her weight. If she's speaking in terms of bloodwork alone, she may be right. On paper, I was perfectly healthy (if you ignored my BMI). Still am. I've lost 54 pounds, and I'm sure my numbers are about the same or better. Am I a healthy weight? Heck no. Am I healthy, generally? Yes.

    I don't think it's right that he lied to her. He should have explained her options. He took the chicken way out of it, and that's wrong.

    I have to call BS on this. I have never had problems with my BP, I have never had problems with my cholesterol, diabetes or anything like that either. But just because those vital stats are ok does not mean you are healthy. At 260 pounds, all my stats were good too, but it made me sick to my stomach to walk for 20 minutes. It took me losing 50lbs to realize how unhealthy I actually was and how much potential I was lacking physically. Denial is a horrible thing.

    I have to call BS on you, dear. I currently weigh close to 300lbs. I am also pregnant. My blood pressure was taken yesterday and was 101/70. All of my stats are awesome. I can RUN up and down stairs no problem. I can EASILY walk more than 20 minutes. With no pain. And I do. All of the time. In the summer I walk around the small lake near our house 1-2 times per week and that is a 4 mile walk and I do it in a little over an hour. I have a close friend who just had a baby last year and she in in the healthy weight range. She had super high blood pressure and had to be put on bed rest for a month and induced three weeks early. Health is relative. It depends much more on genetics, how much you move your body, and what you put into it... than what you weigh. I am not saying that I am "healthy" because I know that carrying around the extra weight puts a strain on my body. Which is why I am here and working on it. But dont sit in your smug little corner and pick at those around you. I dont know why you even posted this? Does it make you feel superior? It shouldn't.

    I'm not picking on anyone, anyone who knows me would testify to that. Neither did I say that people at a healthy weight do not have medical problems. :huh: I do not agree with bodyshaming I just posted an article that is relevant to many people here and something I thought many people would be interested in. Then stated my opinion on the issue.

    You just stated yourself that carrying the extra weight puts a strain on your body....What do you think it does to a fetus that a body is supporting? it is the same reason I am here too. According to my BP, cholesterol and other factors, I have no problems but I am by no means healthy. I just admit and accept it and try to do something to change it.
  • bmqbonnie
    bmqbonnie Posts: 836 Member
    I think the policy thing is probably being blown out of proportion. He probably meant it at a general thing, like high risk pregnancies are better done at the bigger hospital. He probably didn't mean it like "all women weighing over X lbs must not deliver here" was written in stone somewhere but she grabbed onto that and ran with it.

    Sheesh. In most cases it's hard to convince women with normal pregnancies that they DON'T need the most equipped hospital ever and that they don't need to go blasting into the hospital the second that contractions start. You'd think she'd be happy that the doctor is concerned at all. It kinda sounds like she just doesn't really give a crap. My parents didn't like the closest hospital to them where my mom worked that was 45 mins away so they had both my sisters at the hospital that was two hours away. :huh: I feel similarly and suppose if I get pregnant I will probably stay with a friend in the city when my due date looms because the local hospital is pretty crappy.

    BUT I'm sure she's an absolute peach and it devastated the doctor to tell her that he couldn't care for her properly and that she should look elsewhere.