I give up.

124

Replies

  • shaunap3
    shaunap3 Posts: 206 Member
    Giving up only assures you will never be who you want to be. It's okay to feel defeated sometimes, and get upset with everything. I think sometimes you NEED that to kickstart your willpower to keep trying. I understand weightloss is a tough, life-long journey. My entire family is overweight, my grandmother was 300+lbs and died when I was very young after extremely fast weightloss that was somehow kickstarted by her doctor. I've vowed my whole life to never end up like my family. It took me FOUR YEARS to lose 30lbs, but I did it. And I've kept it off. My only suggestion is always try new things. Never feel like you need to get stuck in a rut. Try new foods, new workouts, always strive to break your records and better yourself. That's the only thing that's going to keep you moving forward.
  • Rose_bee
    Rose_bee Posts: 226 Member
    Please see your Dr about why you're having such difficulty losing weight.

    Giving up will guarantee you'll end up 300+ pounds like your relatives.

    By continuing to try and incorporate healthy eating & exercise habits into your daily life you are giving yourself a chance at becoming healthier.

    You can still eat all your favorite things, you just have to eat less of them - it's all about calories in & calories out.

    You *can* do this! Hang in there!
  • NeverGivesUp
    NeverGivesUp Posts: 960 Member
    What I did was train myself to crave different foods. I started by removing gluten, my biggest weakness and addiction. Eventually I made fruits and veggies the core of what I eat and I crave them. One baby step at a time. I am now confident that this will be the very last time I will ever have to lose a significant amount of weight. I don't even count my calories anymore and have also taught myself to love exercise. I was just sick enough of being fat and wanted to finally be happy and connected to my body. You can do it by putting one foot in front of the other.
  • No dont give up..maybe you need to do a liver cleanse or something...clean your liver out, check your thyroid then start to count calories. You can eat the things that you like when you choose counting calories in order to lose weight because losing weight is all about creating a calorie deficit. Maybe you are not eating enough. You should get your BMR done by a nutritionist then let them tell you max calories you can consume and still to lose weight. Check this blog out for inspiration ...http://www.344pounds.com/. Its the personal blog of a man that ate and still eats whatever he wants(hamburgers, bacon pizza..) but still he has lost over 100lbs. and he is happy. He used to be very over weight too. He was even on CNN. Dont give up ...Ill pray for you tonite.
  • Missjulesdid
    Missjulesdid Posts: 1,444 Member
    I live in Korea. Doctor isn't very supportive. Just says dont give up, but thebmedicationnis expensive and lack of results doesn't warrant the price. Definition of crazy is doing the same thing over again and expecting different results. I have no idea what is going on with my body and nothng seems to be working. They tested me last year and said it wasn't my thyroid. She did suggest gastricbypass surgery. But my problem is not eating a lot of food. My problem is how my body processes it. I don't think the surgery, in the long run, would be beneficial to me. I wanted to lose weight so I could have a healthy child but I guess children aren't in my future.

    The problem is you eat more calories than your body spends. Bottom line. Maybe you don't eat a lot compared to other people but you DO eat more than YOUR body requires. I don't eat a ton either... I'm just a very lucky person in that I have a super efficient body that has a very low caloric requirement. For me having bariatric surgery will help bring my appetite in line with my metabolic rate. Yes, I'll still have to watch what I eat and weight will always be a struggle, but the surgery will help make it a bit easier for me to manage my health.
  • shunta864
    shunta864 Posts: 52
    don't give up. listen i have been in the same place for a year. The first 5 months i lost 45 pounds but hit a plateau and was stuck. i couldn't lose any weight no matter what i did. so i gave up. when i started gaining weight back i started back but after a few pounds i would fall off the wagon again. so for a year i was going back and forth with my weight lose. finally something just hit me and i told myself that i can and will do this and i have been. all in all don't give up because you can do it.
  • aakaakaak
    aakaakaak Posts: 1,240 Member
    How to lose weight and keep it off:

    Don't quit.

    So you were weak and went over on calories.
    Big deal. Go burn off what you just ate.

    Don't quit.

    Ugh, I'm so tired. I'm bloated and don't feel like doing ANYTHING!
    Look back at why you're doing this and rededicate yourself to that goal.

    Don't quit.

    I'm depressed and don't want to look at how much I weigh.
    If you gained weight it's not a failure. It's a new point to work from.

    Don't quit.

    Those cupcakes were soooooo delicious, but my calorie count is TOTALLY RUINED NOW!
    Psht, just log em. Maybe you can still work them off. Anyway, tomorrow is another day.

    Don't quit.

    I was away on business and I'm not sure how many calories I had, and I had a few drinks and didn't log anything for a few days!
    The diary is still there, waiting for you. It does not judge. Go back to it.

    Don't quit.

    Oh wow, this diet is making me fat! The numbers are totally off!
    So, fix the numbers and keep going. Many people know how to fix them if you're not sure.

    Don't quit.

    I've hit a plateau! It doesn't work anymore!
    Sure it works. Open up your diary and ask a few people to check out your profile to figure out how to fix it.

    Don't quit.

    There aren't any diet foods that I like.
    Everything is a diet food it you don't eat too much of it. Even pizza and chocolate. Control your portions and be honest what those portions are.

    Don't quit.

    It's a glandular thing. Everyone in my family is fat.
    Then you have some learning to do about how to eat and exercise properly. Find skinny people that used to be fat. Ask them. They would love to help. Don't ask your fat family. They haven't figured it out yet. Once you figure it out you can help them too. You can be that inspiration to your entire family.

    Don't quit.

    If you quit you may as well have done nothing at all.
    Do you really want to waste all that hard work?

    Don't quit.
  • ktliu
    ktliu Posts: 334 Member
    Being Asian , I do understand because everybody is sooooo skinny. Being American my 205 weight is too kinda heavy, for a 5'9" guy medium built, but back in Asia. people called me fat boy. While most of them can't lift a bowling ball without panting. Asian can be very cruel about weights, no sensitivity training in their school. Not that they are A**holes or anything.

    Anywho...recently about a month ago, I tried Phentremine. It was amazing. I eat less, I have excess energy. I WANT to work out. I have been working out 30 days straight with calories burn from 700-1000/day. I love video games, so I lived a very sedentary lifestyle. So I use video games to get me out of this. And it works.II have a Xbox kinect lying around and collecting dust. So i bought a bunch of games and explored. After 1 month I was doing moves I couldn't do while I was in high school!

    So you said the meds were expensive, have you actually used it. It makes a world of difference to me. but you have to couple it with finding out what kind of exercise you like to do. Think back when you were a teenager, what did you like to do. and get over looking stupid. I'm 47 yrs old, I'm doing hip hop infront of my 16 yr old teenage boy. how stupid is THAT. Just have fun , you have to live for yourself. So find your sweet spot. the right meds, the right activity, the right support group...but one thing is probably a given in this group. "Give vegetable a chance"

    So don't get depressed, Don't quit. Forget what the rest of the world is saying. Just be the best You that You can be! Who Gives a *kitten* what haters says.

    We are all Routing for you!!
  • chelle610
    chelle610 Posts: 4 Member
    Try to focus on your health rather than your weight but don't give up! I know you want to lose, but if you give up you will probably end up gaining. Assuming that you have had a full health work-up including thyroid and found nothing, I would trash the scale and focus on eating and doing things that are good for you. Try to find an exercise routine you enjoy enough to do even if you won't loose weight. I found my passion in running. I didn't lose a single pond for the first year - in fact, i actually gained a few. But in the end, my body started to change. It was loving it that kept me going and it's payed off in the long run.
  • ShmareParks
    ShmareParks Posts: 88 Member
    Don't give up, stranger! You don't have to worry about being "thin," but you do have to worry about feeling good and being good to your body and spirit. I was on a real weight-loss plateau although starving myself, but I kept with it and started to lose quite quickly. (That was around the time I started drinking two large cups of green tea a day and maybe that was all the kick my metabolism needed???) I don't know, I just hate to know someone is thinking of quitting when great success could be just around the corner. Also, if you could walk even 30 minutes every day, and I mean every day, I cannot believe for one second you wouldn't see a big shift.
  • Florawanda
    Florawanda Posts: 283 Member
    Please don't give up... you have come so far by being on here, and trying various ways to lose... but there is some great advice here. I agree with the others, and am not sure your doctor is doing you any favours, just taking your money... you don't need any special drugs. But like many of us, the food you are eating too much of is really addictive, but sets you up to not only fail, because you binge on whatever... in my case it is chocolate and crisps... but will also start you off 'needing' more.
    You have to focus on your goals, not just longterm, to have a beautiful babe, but shortterm ones, eg to eat just one thing less than you did the day before. And you need to find all the non-scale victories you can, eg being able to feel the bones on your face, and keep reminding yourself of them.
    It will take time, but slow steps will win in the end. You may hit plateaus on your journey... I have been on one for over 4 months, but I have stuck at it, and seen my body change in other ways as it re-shapes. Yes, I still have days when I eat too much, but am taking more exercise than ever I did two years ago. Patience is key, and learning to moderate and control your eating, so you can have a little of what you love to eat, without eating too much of it.
    Please reach out to all the folk who have tried to help on this thread... you only have 4 friends, and more people will give you more support especially when you are down and depressed. We will be here for you all the way!
    Big hugs... you CAN do it!
  • deputyfife
    deputyfife Posts: 1 Member
    I have been fighting my weight my whole life, too. I am now 56 and the pounds resisted everything for the past few years. UNTIL I learned that I have food allergies and that (of course) normal hormone levels are absent. After adjusting to no wheat, eggs, milk, etc. and adding some topical hormone cream, I am now losing and no longer have acid reflux. I'm not suggesting that this will work for others. I am just saying not to give up. Obesity kills and disables. We must each find our path to a healthy weight for ourselves and those that love us.
  • chevvy50
    chevvy50 Posts: 14
    Please dont :( ....every day a new day lovey.....no one is destined to be overweight be a shining light of inspiration in every day of you journey .....xxgod bless you
  • jenilla1
    jenilla1 Posts: 11,118 Member
    You'll do what you need to do when it truly becomes your priority. Right now, weight loss doesn't seem to be your priority. It's just another frustrating struggle in your life, bringing you down. You sound depressed. It's hard to stay motivated or even define your priorities when you're feeling hopeless and trapped. Maybe you've been seeing the wrong kind of doctor? Good luck and don't give up - just refocus. :heart:
  • spaingirl2011
    spaingirl2011 Posts: 763 Member
    I am a hamster on a wheel. Running and going nowhere. I feel like my body has been damaged beyond repair. I have tried all the suggestions on here and sought medical help. But I can't fight it. I have no fight left. My birth mother and sister are over 300 lbs and looks like I am heading that way. Bit I refuse to do it eating foods I hate. I've lost 6 lbs in one year but had lost a little more. It's all coming back on. I should just accept that I am fat. Thank you everyone who is tried to help. Appreciate it. This website is great for those who are successful. Unfortunately for me, it has just made me depressed. I wish everyone the best.

    I am successful BECAUSE i joined MFP and i stuck to it!!!!
    I've tried eating all my exercise calories, not eating all my exercise categories, weightlifting, reducing my calories, increasing my calories, heart rate monitor, adjusting my macros, increasing my exercise, decreasing and increasing my exercise, adjusting my tdee to find an optimal caloric rate (never found). I won't quit exercise. It's my lifestyle. But I have to give up the notion that ill ever be thinl.

    It sounds like you bounce around too much. If you have a large amount of weight to lose, I would recommend following MFP's guidelines in terms of how many calories to eat, and i recommend doing cardio and eating back exercise calories. I suggest logging every walk you take as exercise. I did this and lost 50 lbs. I think weight lifting is amazing....but i also will admit that when I was obsese, the weight gain that weightlifting showed up on the scale made me feel SO FRICKEN FRUSTRATED that I QUIT. Then i spent another two years being fat before I joined MFP. I think weightlifting is great, even for bigger folks, but it looks to me like you can't handle emotionally the weight fluctuations it would cause any more than I could at the time. Either way- you need to pick one program AND STICK TO IT. Switching things up too much too often can make it hard to even know what is working.
    I closed my diary because I knew there would be negative people just ready to kick someone when rhey are down. I have seen it too often on here. To sumit up, my diary looks like someone struggling to find the right macros and caloric rate for success and didn't have much luck. I exercise between 3 and 5 hours at med to high intensity,

    Stop the boat!!!! If you are obese and have a lot of weight to lose, you are making things WAY TOO COMPLICATED!!! You need to slow yourself down and take baby steps.

    Step #1: Make the decision to change (You did this! Fantastic! Well on your way!)

    Step #2: Figure out how many calories you should be eating and begin logging your food intake. My suggestion is to keep it SIMPLE. Simple as in plug in your weight information into MFP and say you want to lose 1-2 lbs per week and then do what it says.

    Step #3: Exercise! (You DO THIS! YES!! WELL on your WAY!!). Log your exercise!

    Step #4: EAT your exercise calories!

    Step #5: MANTAIN AN ATTITUDE OF GRATITUDE. This seems cheesey, but no one changed their life by beating themselves up. You get a positive feedback loop going in this whole thing- you eat healthy, you work out, you see the scale move! You have a stokefest! Do it all again!

    Step #6: When you FRAK UP, just tell yourself "ok. I ate waaaay too much today (or didn't exercise, or whatever)" And then get back on that horse and get right back to it. In my "journey" from obese to athletic, I ate pizza and chocolate, i sometimes ate way too much. I had days that i didn't exercise. Moments when I felt like i wasn't going to get any better. I had someone ask me if I was pregnant after I had reached my frist goal weight. I didn't let those things ruin me. I cried like a baby and then I got back to it. That's what WINNERS do. They pick themselves up and they get back to it, no matter how many times they fall.

    Step #7: As you lose weight, reevaluate your caloric goals, and your exercise, as needed. Inehrently, as you get to your maintenance level, you will find yourself learning about TDEE and macros and all that stuff. But right now, too much information is overwhelming you and derealiing you. I was on MFP for three years before I swithced to TDEE. Two years before I picked up the weights. It's ok to not be doing every possible thing all at once. Some things are more appropriate for people in maintenance than they are for someone who is obese.

    And relax.

    Life is a precious gift. Go out in the sunshine and enjoy it. You might find that something you did that made you happy as hell, like going for a long walk with a loved one, or going snowboarding listening to your favorite album, burns a ton of calories and gives you the joy you have been seeking all along.

    <3

    oh, last step, step #8: NEVER EVER EVER EVER EVER GIVE UP!

    LOVE THIS!!
  • MindyG150
    MindyG150 Posts: 1,296 Member
    Although its as simple as cutting back calories and getting off your behind and moving...it's not that easy...get friends and get moving...don't let this run your life....Sign up for anything that makes you move...you are not alone.
  • CoraGregoryCPA
    CoraGregoryCPA Posts: 1,087 Member
    Don't give up!!! Find foods you love and fit them into your calories :)

    Do you like cooking? Get some cook books and cook your butt off :) It's fun, healthy and easy :) Experiment away!
  • stephaniemejia1671
    stephaniemejia1671 Posts: 482 Member
    I won't accept this. Keep going, try again, a different approach. But stop you will not. I've been where you are. Get going again.The more proud you will be of the results.
  • wildaaron
    wildaaron Posts: 163 Member
    There's a lot more support here than anywhere else - I noticed that straight away. It sounds like you've tried too many things at once too.

    Go find a different doctor or nutritionist, personal trainer, anything like that who can set you up on a good plan and incorporate it with this. If you're struggling reach out for help, do not just quit. Quitting is how I got to this size - it's not worth it.
  • fitplease
    fitplease Posts: 647 Member
    Don't give up. Keep trying! you CAN do it. It just takes time. :-)

    Have you tried working out at a low intensity? When your HR gets high, you tend to use up more carbs. When it is lower, you tend to use more fat for fuel.
  • Thank you for those who offered your support.
  • VivaciousVic
    VivaciousVic Posts: 20 Member
    Giving up is NOT an option...... You owe YOU more than to Give up.... Keep it going... I've started over, more times than I've QUIT and that's the difference. You can DO THIS.... Don't get up.
  • 24redwine
    24redwine Posts: 43
    I have to say I loved to see this community provide such positive support. It's really amazing. MFP is so much more than how we look or what size we are -- we are talking about our health. We cannot give up on that. Good luck to all of you.
  • When you've eaten too much and you can't write it down, And you feel like the biggest failure in town. When you want to give up just because you gave in, and forget all about being healthy and thin. So What! You went over your points a bit, It's your next move that counts...So don't you quit! It's a moment of truth, it's an attitude change. It's learning the skills to get back in your range. It's telling yourself, "You've done great up till now. You can take on this challenge and beat it somehow." It's part of your journey toward reaching your goal. You're still gonna make it, just stay in control. To stumble and fall is not a disgrace, If you summon the will to get back in the race. But, often the struggler's, when loosing their grip, Just throw in the towel and continue to slip. And learn too late when the damage is done, that the race wasn't over...they still could have won. Lifestyle change can be awkward and slow, but facing each challenge will help you grow. Success is failure turned inside out, the silver tint in a cloud of doubt. When you're pushing to the brink, just refuse to submit, If you bite it, you write it....But don't you quit!
  • emma155
    emma155 Posts: 152 Member
    I suspect I know the problem, but the OP's diary is closed. Oh well.

    I think we are thinking the same thing.


    Open the diary or at least tell me how how many cals you are eating a day, how you measure weight loss. Also do you record EVERYTHING you eat? I record down to half a biscuit, a satsuma etc.
    How active are you?
    How much do you weigh?

    Do you know that you have to burn 3500 cals to lose 1lb of fat? So if you have a deficit of 500 calos a day you will lose 1lb of fat a week which is 48lb a year....

    Please fill in the info so i can try and help :)
  • d2footballJRC
    d2footballJRC Posts: 2,684 Member
    I suspect I know the problem, but the OP's diary is closed. Oh well.

    I think we are thinking the same thing.


    Open the diary or at least tell me how how many cals you are eating a day, how you measure weight loss. Also do you record EVERYTHING you eat? I record down to half a biscuit, a satsuma etc.
    How active are you?
    How much do you weigh?

    Do you know that you have to burn 3500 cals to lose 1lb of fat? So if you have a deficit of 500 calos a day you will lose 1lb of fat a week which is 48lb a year....

    Please fill in the info so i can try and help :)

    The 3500 cals to lose 1lb of fat isn't quite true.. General rule of thumb but there are many other factors. Especially when you factor in you'll lose a bit of muscle, some weight loss is water and etc. Also as Layne Norton says, the longer you are on a diet and eating, depending on a defect you are eating at that numbers changes a bit.
  • iamjude17
    iamjude17 Posts: 40
    Hey!! I totally feel you!! But can I make a suggestion? If you really don't want to end up obese like your family.....then just eat smarter!! I can't do a lot of physical stuff because I've had 6 foot surgeries on my right foot, so I can't be on it very long, and I FOR SURE can't do aerobics on it!! Also, I have severe back problems.....not that I can't get around, I can, but for example, standing over a sink doing dishes for 20 minutes kills me. SO, if you want to lose weight and you don't want to have to cut down your food, my suggestion is to go raw foods and vegan. I started out weighing 274. I juiced for a week, then I went raw and then vegan and now I do all three, and in ONE MONTH, I lost 21 pounds!!! No exercise!! So, you can eat all the veggies in a stir fry with an organic sauce, last night I had stir fry with organic orange chicken dressing and I ate 2 bowls full! Of course, portion size is very important, so, If you wanted to eat like 2 cups at a time with about 3 hours in between, the weight would fall off, FALL OFF!! I have my bad days too, but the funny part, is that my husband and I used to order a large pizza and eat the whole thing....and now, since we've changed what we eat, regular bad food makes us SO SICK!! Our bodies to not like all the processed and fattening foods ANYMORE. It took about 2 weeks, but, if you can make it through the first two weeks, being vegan and eating fruits and veggies....you'll actually get used to it, even better, you'll see the weight coming off and you won't want to stop!! Anyways, I thought I would never get the weight off, in my physical condition.....and girl, if I can do, so can you!! Please don't give up!!! You will be so much happier in a healthier body!!! Good Luck~
  • jeanniewes
    jeanniewes Posts: 3,853 Member
    Oh Please dont feel that way! I know it is hard. It took me THREE YEARS too lose 50 pounds. When My Doctor did a test he found I had a HIGH INSULIN level. He gave me medication for that thinking that would help me...well it may be bringing my Insulin level down BUT I have still not lost more than one pound or two here and there. I seem too be in a yo-yo syndrome... . I just keep walking, eating Healthy and go on. It is NOT A DIET. It is a healthy change for LONGER LIFE.... EXERCISE IS important. I started out with walking only ten minutes and after a week I increased it. Each week increasing. I now walk 3-5 miles a day and have done 8 miles. I could probably do 8 miles every day. I do get a bit lazy on that. There are foods I dont like so I just dont eat them. I learned too eat a few new foods along the way. I use too think I could not eat fish anyway but Fried. I have learned too spray my fish with those Can spray things. I then sprinkle just a bit of Fish seasoning on each side and cook it in a NON STICK skillet and LOVE IT...I LOVE FISH this way. I wish I knew how too help you but PLEASE DONT GIVE UP... I had lost most of my weight before I started FF. Since then I have fluctuated up a pound or two and back a pound or two... I just keep trying too move on...
  • betzeross
    betzeross Posts: 161 Member
    When you've eaten too much and you can't write it down, And you feel like the biggest failure in town. When you want to give up just because you gave in, and forget all about being healthy and thin. So What! You went over your points a bit, It's your next move that counts...So don't you quit! It's a moment of truth, it's an attitude change. It's learning the skills to get back in your range. It's telling yourself, "You've done great up till now. You can take on this challenge and beat it somehow." It's part of your journey toward reaching your goal. You're still gonna make it, just stay in control. To stumble and fall is not a disgrace, If you summon the will to get back in the race. But, often the struggler's, when loosing their grip, Just throw in the towel and continue to slip. And learn too late when the damage is done, that the race wasn't over...they still could have won. Lifestyle change can be awkward and slow, but facing each challenge will help you grow. Success is failure turned inside out, the silver tint in a cloud of doubt. When you're pushing to the brink, just refuse to submit, If you bite it, you write it....But don't you quit!

    This pep talk put to rhyme is great! :happy:
  • ekaustin7
    ekaustin7 Posts: 185 Member
    I closed my diary because I knew there would be negative people just ready to kick someone when rhey are down. I have seen it too often on here. To sumit up, my diary looks like someone struggling to find the right macros and caloric rate for success and didn't have much luck. I exercise between 3 and 5 hours at med to high intensity,

    Months ago I gave up chocolate. My favourite food in the world. I eat it occasionally now instead of every day. I thought that was contributing to my failure.

    Thanks for those who gave me encouragement, it is nice to hear a kind word while I am mentally beating myself up. For those who feel the need to be qn online bully, perhaps you no longer have weight issues but you have other issues holding you back. There is never any need to be mean.

    To be honest, I have not seen one single bullying post on this thread. People are asking questions in an attempt to help you. You aren't letting them help - THAT is when the snarky responses and less than fully supportive statements start.

    :drinker: