Is it wrong for me to go out with someone younger?

13

Replies

  • ladymiseryali
    ladymiseryali Posts: 2,555 Member
    I sure hope no one thinks it's wrong, I date pretty much nothing but older guys myself :laugh:

    The majority of my relationships were with older men. I'm engaged to someone who is 7 yrs older than me. I've dated a few younger guys, but that was when I was in my late teens and early twenties.
  • MireyGal76
    MireyGal76 Posts: 7,334 Member
    I am 36, and dated a 48 year old for a number of months. Thing was, even though he was in great shape, he started to act like my father. He was talking about retirement, I'm just getting into the peak of my career. I couldn't imagine him being retired for 13 years while I still worked 40 hours a week.

    He kept saying things like "when you're my age, you'll feel differently about that", "you're young, that will change", and you know, maybe he was right. But I got tired of hearing how much I had to learn in order to be on par with him.

    We ran a half marathon together and someone asked if he was my father. (I've been told I don't look 36). *ouch*

    Maybe you're not like that, maybe you are different, but it was enough of an experience for me to never date at that much of an age gap again.

    Good luck finding your mate though, I'm not saying it couldn't happen.


    ETA: ok.. well maybe NEVER is a tad harsh... I think I'd just be a lot more wary before jumping in with both feet. :)
  • burning2much
    burning2much Posts: 4,846 Member
    I want to thank everyone for their input.
  • lizziebeth1028
    lizziebeth1028 Posts: 3,602 Member
    I'm 48, in very good shape and I find it hard to go out with women my own age. I want to be with someone who is like me, they need to have energy, athletic and in shape. I know this sounds bad, but I keep on dropping the age limit to find someone compatible, I've dropped it down to 30 now (that is as low as I will go). So, should I feel bad about this?

    Go for it! My boyfriend is 12 years younger than I am!
  • meeper123
    meeper123 Posts: 3,347 Member
    Honestlu the being with someone inshape thing has always made since to me you put a lot of time and energy into your body you want someone who has as well
  • toaster6
    toaster6 Posts: 703 Member
    If there's grass on the field...
  • meeper123
    meeper123 Posts: 3,347 Member
    Warning though i dated someone way younger than me before i got married and they where such a snoozefest they were unchallenging uninspired and to be frank kind of a **** lol
  • she_fit
    she_fit Posts: 36
    My husband is turning 28, I just turned 21, and we've been married for 2.5 awesome years. Age REALLY is just a number. But I'm here to tell ya, by just assuming that all 48 year old women are either too unattractive (even though that wasn't explicitly stated, I'm inclined to believe that that is part of your disdain) or not active enough, you have written off several wonderful women.
  • wareagle8706
    wareagle8706 Posts: 1,090 Member
    I think you're fishing for compliments but I'll play anyway....

    Nope, not wrong. As long as she's legal she's fair game. Older (than me) men can be damn sexy. I've dated older men that are close to your age currently when I was younger than my age currently. Also, the person I am dating now is 12 years older than I am.
  • Vmax1992
    Vmax1992 Posts: 41 Member
    My ex is 18 years younger....no big deal.
  • sarahg148
    sarahg148 Posts: 701 Member
    I've had crushes on guys 12 years older and 10 years younger. I was with a guy that was about 2 years younger for 4 years. Right now I'm getting to know a guy that's about 4-5 yrs younger. It's how compatible you are and how you enjoy eachother's company. :bigsmile:
  • sillygoosie
    sillygoosie Posts: 1,109 Member
    I'm getting the feeling I'm making a lot of enemies here, I didn't mean to offend anyone. I think there is a miscommunication. Please read my previous responses. Not knocking women my age, just hard to find single ones that I'm attracted to. There are plenty that are married, but that's not for me. Finding a single one is hard...So don't hate me for wanting to find someone who I would feel compatible with. Be it 30 to 55, it's not the age, just whats available.

    I understand what you mean by this. I've recently started looking at younger guys because I have a really hard time finding men close to my age or older that are single and compatible with me. I'm not quite in cougar mode but I have found that I am enjoying the 30ish age range right now.
  • DonnaNCgirl
    DonnaNCgirl Posts: 372
    I'm 48, in very good shape and I find it hard to go out with women my own age. I want to be with someone who is like me, they need to have energy, athletic and in shape. I know this sounds bad, but I keep on dropping the age limit to find someone compatible, I've dropped it down to 30 now (that is as low as I will go). So, should I feel bad about this?


    Hmmmm...I'm 48, in pretty good shape and I find it unnecessary at the moment to go out with a man my own age. If I were to consider it, WE would have to be COMPATIBLE. I am casually seeing a friend who is like me, has energy, is athletic, and in shape. I know it sounds bad, but I dropped THE AGE LIMIT to hang out with a -30ish year old <GASP>. I don't feel bad about this. You could probably keep up with me.

    Do you think there's something wrong with what you're doing? Are you overly concerned with what other people think?

    Edited to add that he doesn't have mommy issues.
  • lbetancourt
    lbetancourt Posts: 522 Member
    go out with someone that you enjoy to be around. im 42. last 2 guys i dated were 10-14 years younger. so, now i am going older. ;-) to be continued.....
  • CorvusCorax77
    CorvusCorax77 Posts: 2,536 Member
    if you can't find an active woman over the age of 30, you clearly do not live in the PNW.
  • weloveourboys
    weloveourboys Posts: 133 Member
    My husband is 18 years older than I am. As long as you're compatible and have things in common, similar values and goals, etc. age shouldn't be a huge issue. Well, except that when I gave birth to child #3 my husband was 56. If you date/marry a much younger woman, be prepared to be an older father. I think it is hard to find a woman in her early 30s who don't want children! Easier to find a fit and energetic 48 year old woman than a 30 year old who don't want kids IMO!
  • SemperAnticus1643
    SemperAnticus1643 Posts: 703 Member
    I'm 32, hubby is 47. It happens, and it works! The only time we really notice the difference is when we talk popular culture. Anything pre-1980, and I give him a blank stare... lol

    My husband is 4 years older than me and anyting pre 1990 he gets a blank stare. lol
  • Junken_Diraffe
    Junken_Diraffe Posts: 716 Member
    My guy is 47. I'm 32. Nothing wrong with it. It works for us.
  • Trechechus
    Trechechus Posts: 2,819 Member
    Not a problem. As long as you're both consenting adults, go for it. :)

    I have a 22-year-old friend whose boyfriend is 38 and a 23-year-old friend whose boyfriend is 49. They're happy, so what difference does it make to anyone else? :smile:
  • mommy1126
    mommy1126 Posts: 146 Member
    I think age is just a number. As long as they are 18, it does not matter. When i was 21, I dated a 36 year old for quite a while. Now, my hubby is 2 years younger than me. It is not about a number, it is about who they are as a person and if they make you happy!
  • perfectionisntme
    perfectionisntme Posts: 205 Member
    No, not in the least. You are liking the person for who they are, not their age. I'm 30 and the one person I wanted to spend the rest of my life with is 46, but it didn't work that way. I wouldn't trade my life, but thinking about him makes my heart skip a beat.
  • oregonzoo
    oregonzoo Posts: 4,251 Member
    nope who cares. You are happy, she is happy.

    Nothing else really matter.s
  • pastryari
    pastryari Posts: 8,646 Member
    Age doesn't matter, unless one of the people is under 18.
  • IpuffyheartHeelsinthegym
    IpuffyheartHeelsinthegym Posts: 5,573 Member
    no, age shouldn't matter if you enjoy each others company. I'd possibly consider dating a 48 year old....
  • _Witsy_
    _Witsy_ Posts: 609 Member
    Nothing wrong with knowing what you want...as long as you aren't breaking any laws, go find your happiness.
  • infamousmk
    infamousmk Posts: 6,033 Member
    OP: would bang.
  • Elf_Princess1210
    Elf_Princess1210 Posts: 895 Member
    Why should you feel bad? Age is just a number.
  • supahstar71
    supahstar71 Posts: 926 Member
    I'm 48, in very good shape and I find it hard to go out with women my own age. I want to be with someone who is like me, they need to have energy, athletic and in shape. I know this sounds bad, but I keep on dropping the age limit to find someone compatible, I've dropped it down to 30 now (that is as low as I will go). So, should I feel bad about this?


    :sad: Damn. I'm too old for you by 12 years. Oh well, I'm not available anyway. :wink:


    :noway: 48??? Wow. You look great. :flowerforyou:
  • AlsDonkBoxSquat
    AlsDonkBoxSquat Posts: 6,128 Member
    No, as long as your dating someone for the right reasons, if they want the same things as you there's no reason no to date someone younger. I'm 35 and if something happened to my husband (also 35) I think I would date someone older, active, and stable.
  • alzjunkyard
    alzjunkyard Posts: 4 Member
    I don't see anything wrong with dating someone younger so long as they are over 25 (fully matured!) and age isn't the only criteria you are looking for. Have fun with your active lifestyle! I would only think twice about it if you have children that are close to that age. That might make for awkward family interactions.

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