You dont get a second date.....

124

Replies

  • pobalita
    pobalita Posts: 741 Member
    If he talks bad about his exes
    If he is sarcastic or rude to others
    If he is a deadbeat parent
    If he has a big ego
    If there is no physical chemistry.

    If we met through an online site, no second date if he lied in his profile or provided a picture that doesn't look like him. I showed up for a date once with a man who claimed to be 45 - I was 42. When I met him, he confessed to being 55 - "but his friends always tell him he looks younger". I'm still not convinced that the last guy I met was even the same guy as the picture in his profile.:laugh:
  • CheriLMT
    CheriLMT Posts: 220 Member
    After the relationship I just got out of I know one thing I want in my Significant Other.....employment....being with an unmotivated person is so exhausting and it starts to bring down because the bar is set so low...but out with old in with the being single :)
  • If she does anything sexual with me there's absolutely no way I'd respect her enough for a second date. I may just show up at midnite on just "chill" though lol
  • kaylacollinscna
    kaylacollinscna Posts: 102 Member
    There's lots of things that will make or break a date for me.

    I will not ask someone on a second date if:
    They are racist.
    They are homophobic.
    They are impatient and inconsiderate with the waiter or waitress, especially on a busy day.
    They don't like dogs (this is a -must- for me. I grew up with dogs and intend on having one or two. And they'll be medium-big sized dogs)
    They're sexist.
    They mention anything about polyamory. (I respect other peoples needs/choices, however I'm very monogamous and couldn't handle a polyamorous relationship).
    They don't respect my non-religion.
    They're too emotionally unstable or clingy.
    They're boring and can only make small talk.
    They don't have a plan for the future nor seem to care about developing a career and becoming more independent.
    They want too much too soon. (You know what I mean... I take things super slow.)

    On the other side some major turn ons/bonuses include:
    Being an animal lover.
    Being kind of nerdy. I'm a gamer, and it's fun to have someone to play with and also geek out about other nerdy things.
    Willingness to try something new and step out of your comfort zone as well as make me step out of mine. Instead of having a typical dinner and a movie date show that you're adventurous and suggest something more out of the norm.
  • confab151
    confab151 Posts: 299 Member
    If you have some kind of 'master list' that completely spells out the 'do's and don't' for me, yet somehow, I'm not supposed to know, ask or judge any of the choices you've made in YOUR life. In other words, just have fun and enjoy having a good time on your first date....jeez.
  • Some of these lists are huge... My main thing is he has to be a nice guy, with a good sense of humour and a brain...
    I don’t really care if he is a smoker or has yellow teeth or more than £10,000 worth of debt because these are all changeable factors in a persons life. It wont matter a damn if he has a smile like Tom Cruise and is debt free, if he cant make you laugh or have a good conversation with you.
  • raychulj
    raychulj Posts: 458 Member
    If your breath smells
    You don't like cats
    You put me down
    You eat off my plate without asking (I'd gladly share on request)
    You use the "N" word even if you're black.
    You want me to meet your mom ( this is our first date)
    You don't like kids
    Your t-shirt says something vulgur....Haha this is fun
  • Cr01502
    Cr01502 Posts: 3,614 Member
    I'm sick of 'cruisy' guys.

    We can rule this guy out then?

    tomcruise_zps6a13498d.gif
  • raychulj
    raychulj Posts: 458 Member
    I'm sick of 'cruisy' guys.

    We can rule this guy out then?

    tomcruise_zps6a13498d.gif
    ugh HATE HIM!
  • xALEXANDROx
    xALEXANDROx Posts: 3,416 Member
    if you failed the first .
  • QueenGyn
    QueenGyn Posts: 106
    If we don't get along
    Smokes
    Into herself too much
    Not attractive to me
    Loves cats too much
    Isn't healthy
    Doesn't love dogs

    Whats wrong with liking cats too much? :noway:

    If you have bad manners, then its bye-bye. :bigsmile:
  • whatshouldieat
    whatshouldieat Posts: 101 Member
    Some of you are asking how do you find this information out on the first date. Well I hope before there is a first date two people are either calling, texting, or sharing emails back and forth. Why waste each other's time if you can't get straight to the deal breakers. I know what I want to date and I hope the other person knows what they want also. As far as the DEBT goes, well $10,000 is concider managable debt anything after that regardless of what kind of debt it is, its alarming and I dont want to marry someone and I end up taking there debt over because they chose to have poor money skills. Good thing I dont have to worry about this, since I am in a long term relationship. Keep counting those calories.
  • StrongAndHealthyMommy
    StrongAndHealthyMommy Posts: 1,255 Member
    He is horrible
  • SerenaFisher
    SerenaFisher Posts: 2,170 Member
    If we don't get along
    Smokes
    Into herself too much
    Not attractive to me
    Loves cats too much
    Isn't healthy
    Doesn't love dogs
    My cat will eat your dog. Is that a deal breaker? :p

    I saw someone say if they're vegan and that they were joking sort of. I would never date a vegan. I see "I am a vegan" and I run far, far away. From my experience the "vegan" people and I do not get along. I like to grow my burgers from babies then carve off what I want. I do not see anything wrong with this and I a hell of a lot nicer killing animals then animals are when they kill animals. At least I am not chewing their guts out while their squirming around. I don't care if you rip carrots out of the ground and sever them at the roots so leave me and Bessy alone.

    When I dated (eight years ago haha) deal breakers were a long list
    Smoker (of any kind)
    No job
    No motivation
    Had to be at least 5'10"
    Etcetera

    I ended up with a unemployed (but very tall) smoker. He is employed now, he still smokes. My new list would probably be
    What's their credit score?
    Are you employed?



    ....yeah that's it.
  • Some of you are asking how do you find this information out on the first date. Well I hope before there is a first date two people are either calling, texting, or sharing emails back and forth. Why waste each other's time if you can't get straight to the deal breakers. I know what I want to date and I hope the other person knows what they want also. As far as the DEBT goes, well $10,000 is concider managable debt anything after that regardless of what kind of debt it is, its alarming and I dont want to marry someone and I end up taking there debt over because they chose to have poor money skills. Good thing I dont have to worry about this, since I am in a long term relationship. Keep counting those calories.


    HELL YEA!!!!!! MAN I AGREE WITH YOU ALL THE WAY. LADIES DON'T BASH HIM BECAUSE HE'S BEING COMPLETELY REALISTIC. WHEN I WAS YOUNGER ILL ADMIT I DIDN'T CARE ABOUT THAT STUFF BUT NOW NOT BEING ABLE TO MANAGE HER MONEY IS A TURN OFF. AND YES ON A FIRST DATE ID YOU ACTUALLY TALK ABOUT IMPORTANTNTHINGS YOU CAN FIND ALL THIS OUT. ALSO SOMEONE SAID "CHEMISTRY" EARLIER WELL CHEMISTRY CAN BE BUILT, AND IF YOU BELIEVE OTHER WISE YOUR NOT GIVING ANYONE A FAIR CHANCE PEOPLE PUT TO MUCH EMPHASIS ON STUFF LIKE THAT WHEN THEY IGNORE WHAT MATTERS MOST, COMPATIBILITY. AND WHILE WE ARE ON THIS TOPIC, LADIES BE GOAL ORIENTED! I CAN'T STRESS THAT ENOUGH, I DONT CARE WHAT GOALS YOU HAVE BIG OR SMALL JUST HAVE THE DRIVE AND ASPIRATIONS TO MEET THOSE GOALS.
  • myersmomma
    myersmomma Posts: 303
    If you have bad breath...
  • whatshouldieat
    whatshouldieat Posts: 101 Member
    Thank you for your MFP support here.
  • Lulzaroonie
    Lulzaroonie Posts: 222 Member
    ...if you're disrespectful of anyone, while in my presence. This includes racism, homophobia, sexism, bigotry, misogyny... I could go on...

    What is it that is so damn hard about just being nice to other people, whether you're saying it to someone or about them? Just shut up and be nice, it won't kill you!

    Obviously I won't completely write you off if you happen to say something, and I say something like, "I would prefer if you didn't talk like that, we should try to respect everyone, regardless of whether we disagree" and if they continue or don't care, Bye bye....
  • stephelan
    stephelan Posts: 81
    If they tell me they respect Tom Brady as a quarterback or if they idolize any rapists or dog killers....

    Haha! Why does Tom Brady fall into the same category as rapists or dog killers? I think this video is for you:
    http://youtu.be/aeYepdj1Hfs


    As for the topic, I went on a blind date with a friend's recommendation the other night and he spent the whole time comparing me to his past dates and asking me questions like: "What do you look for in your ideal man." and trying to tell me how the "AVERAGE" girl would react in certain situations.
  • IpuffyheartHeelsinthegym
    IpuffyheartHeelsinthegym Posts: 5,573 Member
    one guy recently took me out. He was tall, good looking, maybe talked about himself a little much, but how else do you get to know a person? And, then at the end, he bought a bottle of wine and mentioned something about coming over to drink it. To which I replied I was going to sleep. He said he was, too. I said not at my place. He then proceeded to repeatedly ask about staying and said he would sleep on the couch, even, if I felt better about it. I said I did not. He dropped me off and asked yet again. I said no. I went inside an he called 10 times and texted 3 that night asking if I'd changed my mind.... yea, no second date for him.
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  • kitkat212
    kitkat212 Posts: 7 Member
    If you are overly agreeable, have chest or back hair and wear socks with sandals
  • Coffeeholic8
    Coffeeholic8 Posts: 272 Member
    Can I just get clarification of the rules here?

    Am I right in thinking you actually have to have a first date before you can say no to the second date? I think this is where I'm going wrong, no first dates. :cry: :brokenheart: :tongue:
  • bestbassist
    bestbassist Posts: 177 Member
    If she has kids, is a feminist or religious in any, way she'd be history.
  • Lulzaroonie
    Lulzaroonie Posts: 222 Member
    Being late - once had a date who was 3 hours late and never again. Rudeness would come in a close second.

    You waited for three hours? I'd have gone home after the first hour!
  • Lulzaroonie
    Lulzaroonie Posts: 222 Member
    If she has kids, is a feminist or religious in any, way she'd be history.

    I'm almost 100% sure I shouldn't ask, but why would you not want a woman to be a feminist?
  • If she has kids, is a feminist or religious in any, way she'd be history.

    I'm almost 100% sure I shouldn't ask, but why would you not want a woman to be a feminist?

    THEY HAVE NO SENSE OF HUMOUR AND TAKE THEMSELVES WAY TO SERIOUSLY THEY CAN'T LAUGH AT THEMSELVES AND MOST OF THE TIME JUST A PLAIN *****. AND EVERY FEMINIST I'VE MET GET PISSED AT MEN FOR HAVING A SET WAY OF THINKING INSTEAD OF BEING UPSET WITH OTHER FEMALES WHO PERPETUATE THE STEREOTYPE.
  • TheRealJigsaw
    TheRealJigsaw Posts: 295 Member
    Some of you are asking how do you find this information out on the first date. Well I hope before there is a first date two people are either calling, texting, or sharing emails back and forth. Why waste each other's time if you can't get straight to the deal breakers. I know what I want to date and I hope the other person knows what they want also. As far as the DEBT goes, well $10,000 is concider managable debt anything after that regardless of what kind of debt it is, its alarming and I dont want to marry someone and I end up taking there debt over because they chose to have poor money skills. Good thing I dont have to worry about this, since I am in a long term relationship. Keep counting those calories.


    HELL YEA!!!!!! MAN I AGREE WITH YOU ALL THE WAY. LADIES DON'T BASH HIM BECAUSE HE'S BEING COMPLETELY REALISTIC. WHEN I WAS YOUNGER ILL ADMIT I DIDN'T CARE ABOUT THAT STUFF BUT NOW NOT BEING ABLE TO MANAGE HER MONEY IS A TURN OFF. AND YES ON A FIRST DATE ID YOU ACTUALLY TALK ABOUT IMPORTANTNTHINGS YOU CAN FIND ALL THIS OUT. ALSO SOMEONE SAID "CHEMISTRY" EARLIER WELL CHEMISTRY CAN BE BUILT, AND IF YOU BELIEVE OTHER WISE YOUR NOT GIVING ANYONE A FAIR CHANCE PEOPLE PUT TO MUCH EMPHASIS ON STUFF LIKE THAT WHEN THEY IGNORE WHAT MATTERS MOST, COMPATIBILITY. AND WHILE WE ARE ON THIS TOPIC, LADIES BE GOAL ORIENTED! I CAN'T STRESS THAT ENOUGH, I DONT CARE WHAT GOALS YOU HAVE BIG OR SMALL JUST HAVE THE DRIVE AND ASPIRATIONS TO MEET THOSE GOALS.


    Why are you yelling?
  • My bad.
  • bestbassist
    bestbassist Posts: 177 Member
    If she has kids, is a feminist or religious in any, way she'd be history.

    I'm almost 100% sure I shouldn't ask, but why would you not want a woman to be a feminist?

    Apart from what what paintedr3d mentioned, I only want to date a woman who gets by on her own merit, without needing the government or affirmative action holding her hand. I don't want to date a woman with such a corrosive herd mentality, or a woman who doesn't respect men, and mostly, I don't want to date a child or any other self-entitled, self-absorbed, princess-minded, toxic parasite.

    http://avoiceformen.com