Book Club: Women Food and God (Author: Geneen Roth)

FabulousFifty

Hi friends,:flowerforyou:

I just watched Geneen Roth in an interview on the Oprah Winfrey show. She is the author of Women, Food and God. I am an emotional eater and I have to say, Ms. Roth spoke to my heart today. So much of her message makes sense to me. I am going to purchase her book and study her message. Would you like to join me? If so, purchase the book and meet here on Tues. for our first discussion. Even if you can't get the book by then, please join us. (I am not sure I can get it by then!:)) The discussion question will be posted on Tues. but you can respond and reflect all week.

I don't know about you but I have lost and gained weight one too many times. I want to stop this cycle and live a long, healthy, fit life. I deserve it.....and so do you!

Bump if you want to join so you can find the forum on Tues.

All the best,
Fab:smooched:

LilMissAngi

I saw an ad in People Magazine for this book, and thought about it!

awesome! If I can get it I will join!

georgette70

This is the second time in a week I've heard of this book...I'm intrigued...Going shopping Saturday, so I will look for the book! (P.S. what does bump mean???) Thanks :happy:

FabulousFifty

This is the second time in a week I've heard of this book...I'm intrigued...Going shopping Saturday, so I will look for the book! (P.S. what does bump mean???) Thanks :happy:

You just bumped! (or tagged) Now this will show up in your "my topics." Hmmmmm....2nd time in a week....is it a sign? Hope to see you here next week!

andygirl

Saw the interview as well and just finished ordering the book. It will be a week before I get it but will check back Tuesday to what is said...

georgette70

I just bumped and didn't even know it...lol... I believe it is a sign. See you next week :happy:

mhagoaliemom

I'll watch Oprah when it comes on here today & check it out. :flowerforyou:

sorellabella

I'll try to get the book and join you all...thanks!!

FabulousFifty

I'll watch Oprah when it comes on here today & check it out. :flowerforyou:

I love the scripture on your signature...it says it all! "You fill the hungry with good things, Luke 1:53" I know what I am really hungry for...a closer relationship with my Father!

BeautifulScarsWECHANGED

I'm watching this on Oprah right now and want to go get the book tonight. I'm in! However, I'm really new on this site and have no idea how to "bump" or join a group so if you can send me a message on how to do this I would appreciate it.

AmandaB4588

I paused Oprah on my DVR to order this book in the middle of her show! I can't wait to get my hands on it and am so happy I will have people to discuss it with! Thanks for starting this group!

slightingscale

As soon as I can get the book, I'm very interested. Thanks for starting this thread.:flowerforyou:

FabulousFifty

I paused Oprah on my DVR to order this book in the middle of her show! I can't wait to get my hands on it and am so happy I will have people to discuss it with! Thanks for starting this group!

So glad to have you join us! We may have trouble getting the book...it seems to have had the "Oprah" affect! We will start the discussion with or without the book...see you next week here!

sandara

bump

pmjsmom

I'll join. Not sure if I'll have the book on time but I'll be back on Tuesday!

pmjsmom

I ended up ordering the book because I couldn't get to a bookstore. I should have the book by the end of the week.

DeeDeeLHF

tag. I want to follow this thread.

jrbowers83

So weird I found this thread as I was emotion eating my way through some cake and ice cream after dealing with family drama. I read the first few pages of the book on Amazon, and though I'm reading 3 books with similar ideas (how to change for a closer relationship to God) I want in on this book club. Talk to you all on Tues. And maybe that discussion could talk about those first few pages- everyone can read online?

AmandaB4588

So weird I found this thread as I was emotion eating my way through some cake and ice cream after dealing with family drama. I read the first few pages of the book on Amazon, and though I'm reading 3 books with similar ideas (how to change for a closer relationship to God) I want in on this book club. Talk to you all on Tues. And maybe that discussion could talk about those first few pages- everyone can read online?

I'll read them, too. I ordered mine last week but haven't gotten it yet.

Also, I must warn you that based on the reviews I have read and what I saw on Oprah, the book isn't about being closer with God. Some people found the title deceiving and were upset about that. I haven't read yet but I just assume that it was written to apply to women universally, so God doesn't necessarily mean your God or my God or even any God at all. Who knows? I guess we'll find out when we read!

apromise2me

I'm also looking forward to reading this with all of you. Will pick mine up tomorrow!

Debi :flowerforyou:

FabulousFifty

:flowerforyou: Welcome to the first week of Book Club! We are reading "Women, Food and God,"by Geneen Roth. Please join us, even if you can't get the book right away.

This week please read the Prologue and Ch. 1 + 2. I highly recommend you pick up a pretty notebook to use as a journal while you are reading. (You deserve it! ) Check in each Tues. to respond to the Discussion Question.

Week 1 Discussion Question: As you read Chapters 1 and 2 reflect back to see if you have a memory of using food as a child to medicate or punish yourself. Journal about this incident. Geneen Roth was a child who experienced stress due to her parents turmultuous marriage. She apparently blamed herself for her parent's fighting. She began to "punish herself" by overeating. Read Chapter 1 and 2 to discover how Hostess Snoballs became her vice. :ohwell:

Respond here this week: Tell us about a memory you may have of medicating or punishing yourself with food. What was the trigger? Have you seen this pattern repeat itself throughout your life? How can you deal with these triggers today? How can you stay in control without medicating with food? Here is my first memory and a discovery I made this morning.....(feeling kinda vulnerable...oh well....here goes....:frown: )

My response: I could immediately recall an incident as a child when I read the "Snoball" story. We moved alot when I was a kid. Changing schools alot gave me a level of anxiety to deal with. I felt out of control. I recall in the third grade, after a move, having a crabby teacher who did not warmly welcome a new kid in November. I had to make new friends, in a clicky school, with a teacher who did not adore me. I began to leave my lunch tray full. I wouldn't touch it. I lost a few pounds. I remember on report-card day the teacher weighed us and I had lost 8 pounds since my arrival. I still recall the numbers! I went from 68 pounds to 60 pounds in the third grade. She weighed me twice to make sure. Pretty scrawny kid....I found something I could control in my life. AND...I got attention for it. The teacher actually commented that I had lost weight and my parents should take a look at this. Finally, I had this teacher's attention and concern. I continued this pattern of starving myself through the day and then I began binging after school. It was amazing what I could put away. But I had to sneak to do this. My mother wouldn't want us to ruin our appetite for supper. I clearly recall the first binge. I grabbed a box of "chicken in a basket" crackers and snuck it to my room and polished off the box. I remember the feeling of calm that came over me as I experienced this "carb high," as I polished off that box. Hmmmmmm.....thoughts......I tend to be a carb-a-holic to this day! I still sneak and eat....and who or what am I hiding from?I still....errrr.....used to.....comfort myself with food when experiencing high levels of anxiety. I have dealt with anxiety issues in adulthood. Wow....I am already digging deep and discovering some root causes of my emotional eating. This pattern continued throughout my childhood as I experienced "rough spots" and anxiety. Starve, reward myself by hopping on the scale and seeing the numbers drop (ahhhhh....I controlled SOMETHING), then the binge. The scale-hopping has continued throughout my adult life as well. I know this is all tied together....hmmmm....more to learn about me.

Discovery moment: 1. I do know that MFP has given me accountability and is helping me break this pattern. 2. As an adult, I have a faith that gives me strength. I now know WHO is in control of my life. I have had to struggle through rough spots to know that I must totally rely on my God as my source of strength. These are my personal beliefs. I respect yours. 3. Exercise helps me remain calm and stable. This helps my anxiety today.

NOTE: Please know that Ms. Roth's understanding of God may not be the same as yours and mine. She gives a generic description of her God. The focus of this discussion is not to promote her beliefs or mine. It is for all of us to come to terms with our emotional eating with the support of one another. I do have a personal relationship with Jesus Christ. I am not here to push my beliefs on you but want you to know where I stand. I am just taking this journey through this book and would like some company on the way. I am digging deep to try to come to terms with my own emotional eating patterns. I want to be done with dieting and binging forever. And I know my God wants to hold my hand while I cross over this thresh-hold. I didn't know Him when I began this cycle. I am calling on Him for strength, guidance and wisdom this time. He is in control this time around!

What is your response and did you make a discovery along the way? Tell us about it! (If you haven't been able to get your hands on the book, please grab a journal and begin this walk with us. You can still take part in the discussion until your book comes in.)

:flowerforyou: Fabxoxoxoxoxo

BeautifulScarsWECHANGED

I'm still plugging though the chapters and will post my response hopefully today or tomorrow. I think it's VERY important that you mentioned this should not be a place where we're pushing our religious or spiritual beliefs on eachother. I believe we all have a right to write without judgement in order to really benefit from this experience. I do hope we really focus on the real issue here, why we're here in the first place....we all need to figure out the REAL reasons we're in this pattern to begin with and break the cycle for good.

I'm happy (and scared to be honest) to be in this journey with all of you. I'm not sure what I will find out about myself, but I know this is really the only way I can fully understand why I am here counting the calories.

AmandaB4588

I didn't forget you guys! My book is getting here this evening, so I will respond tomorrow (to the discussion question AND to you guys!)

apromise2me

I went out today and bought the book as well as two others she has written (one on binge eating), so hopefully I'll get a chance to read this evening or tomorrow. Interesting thoughts, Fab!

Debi :flowerforyou:

FabulousFifty

I'm still plugging though the chapters and will post my response hopefully today or tomorrow. I think it's VERY important that you mentioned this should not be a place where we're pushing our religious or spiritual beliefs on eachother. I believe we all have a right to write without judgement in order to really benefit from this experience. I do hope we really focus on the real issue here, why we're here in the first place....we all need to figure out the REAL reasons we're in this pattern to begin with and break the cycle for good.

I'm happy (and scared to be honest) to be in this journey with all of you. I'm not sure what I will find out about myself, but I know this is really the only way I can fully understand why I am here counting the calories.

Well said - I think we are all happy and scared right now. When you dig deep and face your fears you have a choice to make. Do you keep doing what you are doing or make a change. I am ready to face myself, my whole self, good + bad and deal with my issues. I am ready to go forward. And you are right...no one should be in this discussion to push religous values. Mine have significant value to ME. I am not here to recruit church members. I am simply here to take my journey and share my reflections. Thanks for holding my hand on this road. Let's face the unknown together! :flowerforyou:

BeautifulScarsWECHANGED

I would have to agree in saying we're all going to feel volurable here, but here goes.

I can't actually recall a time in my childhood where I had any issues with food. I think my issues began when I was 16. After reading and re-reading and journaling I think I've figured a few things out about myself. I tend to reject food when I feel rejected. Every time in my life where I was anorexic and super thin, I was going through a time in my life where I felt abandoned or rejected. Examples:

• I left home when I was 16 (over a boy of course), my mother wouldn't forgive me and wouldn't let me come back home (unless I broke up with him and completely surrendered to her rules).

• Having to move out of my friend’s house after graduating high school because they were all moving out of state.

• Having to leave my boyfriend’s house (he was rooming with 4 other guys) because the owner of the house was getting married and needed his house back.

• My husband abandoned both myself and my daughter. Throughout our marriage, he became addicted to drugs, abusive, and ultimately decided to just leave and go back to NY. Once again, I found myself rejected and trying to figure out where and how I was going to live. Thinnest I had been in years, yet not the happiest.

Here’s the part I’m still trying to wrap my head around. This is the happiest time in my life, and now I’m the heaviest I’ve ever been. I have a healthy marriage with a wonderful man, I’ve just had my second baby (he’s 6 weeks old today) after 10 years. I know that now I’m dealing with baby weight in addition to the weight I wanted to lose before. So now I have an additional 30 lbs or so to lose on top of the 20 I wanted to lose before becoming pregnant. This is the best time of my life to date….so why am I having such a hard time losing weight??

I’ve thought about this over and over again. One theory I have is, ironically enough, is God….or in my case my spirituality. I’m not religious per se, I don’t believe in a giant human-like figure sitting in a huge chair giving orders. I’m not going to get into my beliefs because I don’t think the details are important here. But as I was journaling, I came to this realization: one of the biggest differences between my current husband (where I’m now struggling with my weight) and my ex-husband (where I didn’t struggle so much) would be the spiritual part of our relationship. My ex-husband and I were pretty much on the same page with our spiritual beliefs. We supported each other with our metaphysical studies, astrology, and our own individual theories. Therefore, I was always studying and learning and growing spiritually. Now….my current husband was raised a Catholic, but now doesn’t believe in ANYTHING. And by that I mean he believes when we die that nothing happens. It’s a big black hole. I always joke with him saying “What’s the point in getting out of bed every day then??”. He never really has an answer. I knew this in the beginning and I really can’t hold it against him. However, he is also a HUGE skeptic…..he won’t believe it unless he sees it and there’s a ton of research out there to back it up. So over the years I have, for the most part, abandoned all my studies because I feel as though I can’t share my thoughts due to his skepticism. I think I feel as though he thinks I’m crazy. In all fairness, I’m not sure if that’s how he really feels….but that’s the vibe I get. I never really thought our spiritual differences really affected me, or us, but now I’m starting to think otherwise.

Definitely worth exploring, and I’m not going to lie when I say I’m a little scared to dive into it. Any thoughts would certainly be appreciated.

AmandaB4588

Response to Discussion Question:

I lived the dream childhood. My parents are still married, and they provided us with an abundance of... well, everything one needs to have a dream childhood. I have always said that if I have children, I hope I can raise them in the exact same way that my parents raised my siblings and me. That being said, I have no memory of using food to punish or medicate myself as a child. I evolved into an emotional eater fairly recently, over the past 3-4 years. It's funny that those years seem SO LONG (and dark and lonely and difficult and and and) in comparison to the many that I spent not caring about weight.

I began to care about my weight when I realized I was fat, which I didn't realize until multiple people asked me if I was pregnant. I had gained 40 lbs in a year without even noticing. My confidence plummeted, and that's when the numbers game began for me. I tried every diet in this short time, losing 25 lbs on the most "successful" one and always gaining every bit back. I find it interesting that the first time I ever dieted in my life happened simultaneously with when I began emotionally eating. I think Roth is onto something!

My moment of discovery came from reading as well as the thought I put into answering this discussion question. I am triggered not by the stresses of life but by the guilt I feel for being stressed. Perfect family, perfect boyfriend, perfect life. How could I feel anything but pure joy? My worries are tiny in comparison to REAL problems, and allowing myself to feel sad/stressed/unhappy means that I am not appreciating all of the great things about my life.

.... shouldn't the first 2 chapters be too soon to feel a huge weight lifted?

AmandaB4588

The fact that both of you have struggled with starving/binging and I haven't is the perfect example of something I would feel tremendous guilt about. In comparison, why in the world should I complain?

BeautifulScars--- Your spirituality is yours. Explore it! As a skeptic myself, I can tell you that we all WANT to believe in something. When things happen that are beyond our control, faith is the difference between feeling helpless or not, and nobody wants to feel helpless. I hope that your husband will support you through this.

BeautifulScarsWECHANGED

Thank you so much for your thoughts Amanda. In essense, I have the pefect life too, but yet here I am. We should try not to compare ourselves to eachother thinking that your struggle isn't as hard or as founded as anothers. We are all struggling with our own personal experiences that have brought us all to the same place. Strange when you think about it.

I'm really glad to be a part of this book club, I think we have a lot to learn about ourselves....and eachother. :-)

FabulousFifty

Beautful Scars: Thank you for your honesty. We are all digging deep and it is kinda unnerving to know we are eally looking at ourselves in the mirror, and for some of us...it is the first time at taking an honest look. I respect your exploration of spirituality and hope you find what you are really hungry for. My hope is that your husband will support you. I am glad you are journaling as you are reading. I think it is in reflection that I come to grips with my real feelings. Keep reading...keep digging....you are sooooo worth it! :flowerforyou:


Amanda: You and G. Roth may be onto something deep....dieting may indeed trigger emotional eating for some. You have been blessed with this solid background and now you must be able to allow yourself to feel your emotions. What you see in the mirror and what I see in my mirror are two different people, with similar problems. Let's dig deep and get to the bottom of this. And yes, I believe it is too early to feel a huge weight lifted after Chapter 1 and 2. But, I am surprised how early we are able to identify some of our triggers of emotional eating. The journaling is helping to get down to the bottom of this.

I haven't been able to resist. I read Chapter 3 today. I am still pondering on Chapters 1-2. Read on if you are ready. :flowerforyou:

HealthyChanges2010

I'm in! I put a hold on it at the library a little while back and I'm #28 so it won't be long, our library system always gets tons when it's on the Oprah show. lol

Just tagging this so I can find you all again!:flowerforyou:

Becca