Ideas for *witty* responses to healthy haters

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  • mareeee1234
    mareeee1234 Posts: 674 Member
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    Bump!!

    Telling my cousin this is a lifestlye change when she insists I'm on a "diet" because I refuse junk food sometimes, just doesn't seem to work :explode:

    ideas..? haha
  • nikilis
    nikilis Posts: 2,305 Member
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    "If you are what you eat then you must be a clown" - (if they like McDonalds ;)

    if we were in a school yard id punch you right now.

    I know you are, you said you are, but what am I?

    hahaha

    I know you are, you said you are, but what am I?
  • lady_in_weighting
    lady_in_weighting Posts: 196 Member
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    hmm, maybe something like, "I prefer healthy vegetables to things like chips, especially the one on your shoulder"

    LOVE IT :)
  • mareeee1234
    mareeee1234 Posts: 674 Member
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    Actually.. when I'm at my goal with rockinn abs, and am all lean and strong... THEN i'll be like.. "check out my bod. nuff said"

    hahaha :wink:
  • Shadowknight137
    Shadowknight137 Posts: 1,243 Member
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    So a close relative remarked, " You can still see the roots on those," as I was happily eating lightly broiled brussels sprouts.

    I would just stare at them for a good few seconds, contemplating what exactly gave them the urge to say something so utterly random and stupid before shrugging and returning to my meal.

    Actually, I do that a lot. Happens when you eat organ meats, funnily enough.
  • nikilis
    nikilis Posts: 2,305 Member
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    Bump!!

    Telling my cousin this is a lifestlye change when she insists I'm on a "diet" because I refuse junk food sometimes, just doesn't seem to work :explode:

    ideas..? haha

    the stern approach

    tumblr_m3g9ye06uh1r05j4oo2_500.gif

    problem solved.
  • nikilis
    nikilis Posts: 2,305 Member
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    So a close relative remarked, " You can still see the roots on those," as I was happily eating lightly broiled brussels sprouts.

    I would just stare at them for a good few seconds, contemplating what exactly gave them the urge to say something so utterly random and stupid before shrugging and returning to my meal.

    Actually, I do that a lot. Happens when you eat organ meats, funnily enough.

    this is a good answer. its like nom nom nom "DA *kitten*" nom nom nom - well played good sir

    this works in all situations.


    ooor, if they have health problems, go for the low blow and bring it up

    'yeh.. haha... good one... so hows your cholesterol these days? awesome
  • RitaSantoss
    RitaSantoss Posts: 986 Member
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    I'm losing weight. You're not.
  • nikilis
    nikilis Posts: 2,305 Member
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    I'm losing weight. You're not.

    throw b!tch in there and you have a winner.
  • myofibril
    myofibril Posts: 4,500 Member
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    How's your See Food diet working out for you? Seriously, when you see food you need to stop...
  • trixiemou
    trixiemou Posts: 554 Member
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    You could just say once they have finished their rant '' And your point is? ' '

    I did once say to a co-worker who always had some comment to make....Look, I like this 'crap' and I would appreciate it if you could just give it a rest.

    Mind you, I do have a certain dislike of brussel sprouts haha.:smile:
  • SamanthaClarexo
    SamanthaClarexo Posts: 353 Member
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    hmm, maybe something like, "I prefer healthy vegetables to things like chips, especially the one on your shoulder"

    OOOOOH.

    tumblr_lp0hwt2Loc1qgn57l_zps6c00db57.gif
  • sammniamii
    sammniamii Posts: 669 Member
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    Well, the last person who did this was a friend, so when they made a face at my brussel sprouts - I tackled them and pinched shut their nose. When they opened their mouth, I shoved a sprout in there then covered their mouth. They ate it and I got off them.... and now they ask when I am gonna make them again.

    BUT... this can only really work w/ friends & family, complete strangers MAY take OFFENCE at being tackled and force-fed sprouts, so I can't really recommend this to others. :bigsmile:
  • myofibril
    myofibril Posts: 4,500 Member
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    Awwww, you have a face like a flower - a cauliflower that is...

    Personally, I think a well timed insult goes a long way.
  • IronSmasher
    IronSmasher Posts: 3,908 Member
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    I don't care about haters.

    I'm too busy being awesome.
  • rabies
    rabies Posts: 62
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    Canned witty responses makes you look lame. Just tune them out and go "uh-huh" every now and then.
  • Macbobbins
    Macbobbins Posts: 17 Member
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    "I like food that gives me energy and good moods, not complete junk that's going to give me bad skin and a fat *kitten*!"
  • ilovedeadlifts
    ilovedeadlifts Posts: 2,923 Member
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    Canned witty responses makes you look lame. Just tune them out and go "uh-huh" every now and then.

    this.
    I personally just do the following when someone says something stupid
    tumblr_m66el4ld8f1rxkh8vo1_400.jpg
  • kss1231
    kss1231 Posts: 167 Member
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    "broccoli gets stuck in your teeth, french fries get stuck on your *kitten*"

    Love this one!
  • kenj13
    kenj13 Posts: 39 Member
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    So a close relative remarked, " You can still see the roots on those," as I was happily eating lightly broiled brussels sprouts.
    "Yeah, you know where they came from," I responded.

    "What? Roots, you say!? Thank God you warned me, and stopped me from eating something that was nutritious. Who knows what would have happen if I ATE vegetables. Why, I might become healthy and possibly lose....*gasp* weight!!! Parish the thought!!!"

    THIS would be my response, but then again, I'm a smart-*kitten*! :wink: