pregnancy doesn't "ruin" your body...

Options
1131416181923

Replies

  • KatLifter
    KatLifter Posts: 1,314 Member
    Options
    Anyway, I'd just like to thank the OP for putting out that not everyone's body gets horribly damaged by pregnancy, and that excess weight shouldn't be blamed on only pregnancy. I do think we are accountable for our own health.

    Says someone who has never shared her body with another human being.

    Sorry, I'm bitter, this I know. But, again, for those of us that DID do what they could to keep their bodies fit, it's terribly offensive for someone to blame sloth and overindulgence for the damage done.

    THAT is my problem with the original and continuous statements I keep reading.

    Apparently pregnancy ruins more women's minds and sense of well-being than bodies. That's an ever more important lesson to remember when looking to have children. If I don't want to become nasty and bitter, don't have kids.
  • RekindledRose
    RekindledRose Posts: 523 Member
    Options
    Everyone responds to pregnancy differently. It definitely CHANGES women, not just during pregnancy but afterwards as well. It's a little bit...sophomoric to assume that since the OP's body responded to pregnancy one way then everyone's should. We're all different.

    The OP should have just posted a thread that was more supportive. Instead of using the challenging language she used, she could have said something like: "Body after Baby!" and simply posted her thread as a Success Story instead of as a thinly veiled excuse to make others feel badly if they worked hard and still have a bit of a belly or stretch marks, or whatever, from their pregnancy.

    Let's try to be more supportive, hmm? Why post a topic in a hurtful way if there's a better way to present your ideas? This site is one that's supposed to help people on their journey, not be a way to make your fellow human being feel like crap.
  • Beezil
    Beezil Posts: 1,677 Member
    Options
    Does every mother with stretchmarks and / or loose skin hate their body so much that they must feel the need to tear down a beautiful, strong, confident young woman just for sharing her success? Something, mind you, that she was only doing because she wanted to inspire other moms / moms-to-be and because she is proud of what she has accomplished. For the love of all that is good in this world, would it kill you people to look at what is positive about this post instead of tearing it to shreds, analyzing it, and thinking it to death until you are blue in the face and foaming at the mouth with OBVIOUS bitterness and jealousy?

    If she had stretchmarks and loose skin, I guarantee 90% of the negativity in this thread would not exist. Grow the hell up and stop putting your personal hangups on other people.

    ETA: Congrats OP on your success. It is an inspiration, at least to some, I'm sure. I think it's wonderful, and definitely proves women CAN bounce back after pregnancy, even if they don't / can't always end up looking like you (which should be obvious, since we ALL know everyone is different...).
  • Athena53
    Athena53 Posts: 717 Member
    Options
    I would personally like to thank the person who wrote this post. I'm still young and I'm not planning on having a baby for a long time, but I'm personally terrified of ever having a baby, partly because of how I'm always hearing about how it ruins your body. I'm pretty sure I've heard a lifetime supply of "baby weight" comments.

    Just pick up a copy of People and look at pictures of actresses hanging out in bikinis post-baby. Granted, they get paid to look good and probably spend 3 hours a day at the gym with a personal trainer and live on tofu and white wine, but I'm sure there are women around you who lead normal lives and pretty much recovered their post-baby shapes. With some determination (and the combination of luck, genetics and the grace of God), you'll be fine.
  • Pepper2185
    Pepper2185 Posts: 994 Member
    Options
    Everyone responds to pregnancy differently. It definitely CHANGES women, not just during pregnancy but afterwards as well. It's a little bit...sophomoric to assume that since the OP's body responded to pregnancy one way then everyone's should. We're all different.

    The OP should have just posted a thread that was more supportive. Instead of using the challenging language she used, she could have said something like: "Body after Baby!" and simply posted her thread as a Success Story instead of as a thinly veiled excuse to make others feel badly if they worked hard and still have a bit of a belly or stretch marks, or whatever, from their pregnancy.

    Let's try to be more supportive, hmm? Why post a topic in a hurtful way if there's a better way to present your ideas? This site is one that's supposed to help people on their journey, not be a way to make your fellow human being feel like crap.

    Yes, we should all be supportive and not make people feel like crap. OP deserves this courtesy as well.
  • Rhiana1188
    Rhiana1188 Posts: 67 Member
    Options
    Anyway, I'd just like to thank the OP for putting out that not everyone's body gets horribly damaged by pregnancy, and that excess weight shouldn't be blamed on only pregnancy. I do think we are accountable for our own health.

    Says someone who has never shared her body with another human being.

    Sorry, I'm bitter, this I know. But, again, for those of us that DID do what they could to keep their bodies fit, it's terribly offensive for someone to blame sloth and overindulgence for the damage done.

    THAT is my problem with the original and continuous statements I keep reading.

    Apparently pregnancy ruins more women's minds and sense of well-being than bodies. That's an ever more important lesson to remember when looking to have children. If I don't want to become nasty and bitter, don't have kids.

    Say what you like. But until you have kids and realize you weren't one of the ones blessed with a snap back body which someone else condescends you for (by implying that if you don't look fabulous and toned post-baby that you've "let yourself go") keep your mouth shut.
  • PezAzul
    PezAzul Posts: 42
    Options
    I had my first child at age 21. I looked just as good as the OP 6 months after giving birth. Thought it was a breeze!!

    Child number 2 I had at 30 and fairly thin. I now look and feel like crap. And I'm 3 years pp. Tried for over a year to get the pouch to go away. It never did and I doubt it ever will. Gave up.

    I was wrong. BUT I wouldn't give up either of my children for anything in the whole entire world.
  • Beezil
    Beezil Posts: 1,677 Member
    Options
    Anyway, I'd just like to thank the OP for putting out that not everyone's body gets horribly damaged by pregnancy, and that excess weight shouldn't be blamed on only pregnancy. I do think we are accountable for our own health.

    Says someone who has never shared her body with another human being.

    Sorry, I'm bitter, this I know. But, again, for those of us that DID do what they could to keep their bodies fit, it's terribly offensive for someone to blame sloth and overindulgence for the damage done.

    THAT is my problem with the original and continuous statements I keep reading.

    Apparently pregnancy ruins more women's minds and sense of well-being than bodies. That's an ever more important lesson to remember when looking to have children. If I don't want to become nasty and bitter, don't have kids.

    Say what you like. But until you have kids and realize you weren't one of the ones blessed with a snap back body which someone else condescends you for (by implying that if you don't look fabulous and toned post-baby that you've "let yourself go") keep your mouth shut.

    The OP wasn't implying anything about you. She was saying getting pregnant, having a baby, etc., shouldn't be USED as an EXCUSE to let yourself go. Your insecurity is astounding. I'm sorry you are so unhappy with your body, but you can't really accuse someone of insulting you or insinuating things about you that just aren't there. It's ludicrous.
  • cleback
    cleback Posts: 261 Member
    Options
    The OP would've been much better off including the well-known disclaimer: "Results not typical. Individual results may vary." lol

    But seriously, her tummy looks fantastic... although I do agree she has to thank genetics for the lack of stretch marks and ab separation. Her rockin bod is not just the consequence of exercise and healthy food eating.
  • Rhiana1188
    Rhiana1188 Posts: 67 Member
    Options
    Anyway, I'd just like to thank the OP for putting out that not everyone's body gets horribly damaged by pregnancy, and that excess weight shouldn't be blamed on only pregnancy. I do think we are accountable for our own health.

    Says someone who has never shared her body with another human being.

    Sorry, I'm bitter, this I know. But, again, for those of us that DID do what they could to keep their bodies fit, it's terribly offensive for someone to blame sloth and overindulgence for the damage done.

    THAT is my problem with the original and continuous statements I keep reading.

    Apparently pregnancy ruins more women's minds and sense of well-being than bodies. That's an ever more important lesson to remember when looking to have children. If I don't want to become nasty and bitter, don't have kids.

    Say what you like. But until you have kids and realize you weren't one of the ones blessed with a snap back body which someone else condescends you for (by implying that if you don't look fabulous and toned post-baby that you've "let yourself go") keep your mouth shut.

    The OP wasn't implying anything about you. She was saying getting pregnant, having a baby, etc., shouldn't be USED as an EXCUSE to let yourself go. Your insecurity is astounding. I'm sorry you are so unhappy with your body, but you can't really accuse someone of insulting you or insinuating things about you that just aren't there. It's ludicrous.

    If I was happy and secure with my body, I wouldn't be on MyFitnessPal trying to change it. But for her to post such a broad statement as "don't let yourself go" and that "you WILL bounce back" before posting pictures of her fantastic 6 mos PP belly, it's insulting to those of us who DO not, in fact, bounce back. Ever. She could have come across in a different way with MUCH more positivity if she had said something like "it's possible to look great after baby" or "for some of us, pregnancy doesn't ruin our bodies" instead.
  • A_Fit_Mom
    A_Fit_Mom Posts: 602 Member
    Options
    The OP pics are hope and all the other comments are scaring the he** out of me. I'm terrified of doing all this work. Losing over 100 lbs, finally have a decent body for once in my life and then ... mangle it with a pregnancy. this is seriously unfair.


    Don't be scared. I lost a lot of weight and was in shape when I got pregnant with my first child. I bounced back within a year and looked great....no stretch marks..etc. I started gaining weight on my own and with my second pregnancy it was my fault..I gained so much.

    But even after my second pregnancy, I have no stretch marks and my belly has the potential to be flat again..I am working on it.
  • Beezil
    Beezil Posts: 1,677 Member
    Options
    Anyway, I'd just like to thank the OP for putting out that not everyone's body gets horribly damaged by pregnancy, and that excess weight shouldn't be blamed on only pregnancy. I do think we are accountable for our own health.

    Says someone who has never shared her body with another human being.

    Sorry, I'm bitter, this I know. But, again, for those of us that DID do what they could to keep their bodies fit, it's terribly offensive for someone to blame sloth and overindulgence for the damage done.

    THAT is my problem with the original and continuous statements I keep reading.

    Apparently pregnancy ruins more women's minds and sense of well-being than bodies. That's an ever more important lesson to remember when looking to have children. If I don't want to become nasty and bitter, don't have kids.

    Say what you like. But until you have kids and realize you weren't one of the ones blessed with a snap back body which someone else condescends you for (by implying that if you don't look fabulous and toned post-baby that you've "let yourself go") keep your mouth shut.

    The OP wasn't implying anything about you. She was saying getting pregnant, having a baby, etc., shouldn't be USED as an EXCUSE to let yourself go. Your insecurity is astounding. I'm sorry you are so unhappy with your body, but you can't really accuse someone of insulting you or insinuating things about you that just aren't there. It's ludicrous.

    If I was happy and secure with my body, I wouldn't be on MyFitnessPal trying to change it. But for her to post such a broad statement as "don't let yourself go" and that "you WILL bounce back" before posting pictures of her fantastic 6 mos PP belly, it's insulting to those of us who DO not, in fact, bounce back. Ever. She could have come across in a different way with MUCH more positivity if she had said something like "it's possible to look great after baby" or "for some of us, pregnancy doesn't ruin our bodies" instead.

    How is it insulting? You're basically arguing semantics here. She didn't come on here claiming everyone will bounce back exactly the same way she did. It's supposed to be a motivating, positive post. The fact that you're twisting it into something negative, as if she came here trying to insult you just because you have different genetics, is ridiculous. If you're insulted by her post, it's a YOU issue, not hers.
  • Rhiana1188
    Rhiana1188 Posts: 67 Member
    Options
    Anyway, I'd just like to thank the OP for putting out that not everyone's body gets horribly damaged by pregnancy, and that excess weight shouldn't be blamed on only pregnancy. I do think we are accountable for our own health.

    Says someone who has never shared her body with another human being.

    Sorry, I'm bitter, this I know. But, again, for those of us that DID do what they could to keep their bodies fit, it's terribly offensive for someone to blame sloth and overindulgence for the damage done.

    THAT is my problem with the original and continuous statements I keep reading.

    Apparently pregnancy ruins more women's minds and sense of well-being than bodies. That's an ever more important lesson to remember when looking to have children. If I don't want to become nasty and bitter, don't have kids.

    Say what you like. But until you have kids and realize you weren't one of the ones blessed with a snap back body which someone else condescends you for (by implying that if you don't look fabulous and toned post-baby that you've "let yourself go") keep your mouth shut.

    The OP wasn't implying anything about you. She was saying getting pregnant, having a baby, etc., shouldn't be USED as an EXCUSE to let yourself go. Your insecurity is astounding. I'm sorry you are so unhappy with your body, but you can't really accuse someone of insulting you or insinuating things about you that just aren't there. It's ludicrous.

    If I was happy and secure with my body, I wouldn't be on MyFitnessPal trying to change it. But for her to post such a broad statement as "don't let yourself go" and that "you WILL bounce back" before posting pictures of her fantastic 6 mos PP belly, it's insulting to those of us who DO not, in fact, bounce back. Ever. She could have come across in a different way with MUCH more positivity if she had said something like "it's possible to look great after baby" or "for some of us, pregnancy doesn't ruin our bodies" instead.

    How is it insulting? You're basically arguing semantics here. She didn't come on here claiming everyone will bounce back exactly the same way she did. It's supposed to be a motivating, positive post. The fact that you're twisting it into something negative, as if she came here trying to insult you just because you have different genetics, is ridiculous. If you're insulted by her post, it's a YOU issue, not hers.

    If you read the thread, you'll see it's not a "ME" issue, it's "mommies without snap back bodies" issue. If you'll notice, the only people who weren't offended by what OP said are the ones whose bodies aren't totally "changed," "ruined," whatever, by having kids.
  • Beezil
    Beezil Posts: 1,677 Member
    Options
    Anyway, I'd just like to thank the OP for putting out that not everyone's body gets horribly damaged by pregnancy, and that excess weight shouldn't be blamed on only pregnancy. I do think we are accountable for our own health.

    Says someone who has never shared her body with another human being.

    Sorry, I'm bitter, this I know. But, again, for those of us that DID do what they could to keep their bodies fit, it's terribly offensive for someone to blame sloth and overindulgence for the damage done.

    THAT is my problem with the original and continuous statements I keep reading.

    Apparently pregnancy ruins more women's minds and sense of well-being than bodies. That's an ever more important lesson to remember when looking to have children. If I don't want to become nasty and bitter, don't have kids.

    Say what you like. But until you have kids and realize you weren't one of the ones blessed with a snap back body which someone else condescends you for (by implying that if you don't look fabulous and toned post-baby that you've "let yourself go") keep your mouth shut.

    The OP wasn't implying anything about you. She was saying getting pregnant, having a baby, etc., shouldn't be USED as an EXCUSE to let yourself go. Your insecurity is astounding. I'm sorry you are so unhappy with your body, but you can't really accuse someone of insulting you or insinuating things about you that just aren't there. It's ludicrous.

    If I was happy and secure with my body, I wouldn't be on MyFitnessPal trying to change it. But for her to post such a broad statement as "don't let yourself go" and that "you WILL bounce back" before posting pictures of her fantastic 6 mos PP belly, it's insulting to those of us who DO not, in fact, bounce back. Ever. She could have come across in a different way with MUCH more positivity if she had said something like "it's possible to look great after baby" or "for some of us, pregnancy doesn't ruin our bodies" instead.

    How is it insulting? You're basically arguing semantics here. She didn't come on here claiming everyone will bounce back exactly the same way she did. It's supposed to be a motivating, positive post. The fact that you're twisting it into something negative, as if she came here trying to insult you just because you have different genetics, is ridiculous. If you're insulted by her post, it's a YOU issue, not hers.

    If you read the thread, you'll see it's not a "ME" issue, it's "mommies without snap back bodies" issue. If you'll notice, the only people who weren't offended by what OP said are the ones whose bodies aren't totally "changed," "ruined," whatever, by having kids.

    I'm not offended, and I have stretchmarks galore, not to mention loose, sagging skin at the bottom of my stomach that will never go away without surgery. I still managed to get the actual point of what she posted, rather than twisting it into something it wasn't. I'd be lying if I said I wasn't jealous that she didn't get stretchmarks or loose skin, but I don't hold it against her or the intent of her post. Neither should anyone else, because it's not fair to do so. Would you hold it against someone who had done the same thing if they had stretchmarks / loose skin / separated abdominal muscles? I highly doubt it.
  • kimad
    kimad Posts: 3,010 Member
    Options
    You are very lucky.. I carried twins full term, they weighed over 14lbs combined... and I need a tummy tuck and abs sewn back together to ever have a nice tummy again... I gained well over 80 lbs.. My stretch marks go from my boobs right to my pelvic area and are easily 2 inches thick.

    So while you shouldn't view pregnancy as 'ruining' your body as kids are a great gift from God... it really does take a toll on it.

    And alot of us aren't lucky to just 'bounce back' so people need to be sensitive of that fact..
  • A_Fit_Mom
    A_Fit_Mom Posts: 602 Member
    Options
    I'm not offended, and I have stretchmarks galore, not to mention loose, sagging skin at the bottom of my stomach that will never go away without surgery. I still managed to get the actual point of what she posted, rather than twisting it into something it wasn't. I'd be lying if I said I wasn't jealous that she didn't get stretchmarks or loose skin, but I don't hold it against her or the intent of her post. Neither should anyone else, because it's not fair to do so. Would you hold it against someone who had done the same thing if they had stretchmarks / loose skin / separated abdominal muscles? I highly doubt it.

    Exactly, I am not sure why so many were offended. She is proud of what she did, I am jealous she did it so quickly....but hey good for her. It is motivation for me, my youngest is over two and I am just now getting my self in shape. I understand what the OP meant, and I don't think she was being rude.
  • pinktiger8
    pinktiger8 Posts: 130
    Options
    Pregnancy raised my metabolism exponentially! Before, I gained weight eating anything no matter how little or how much. I was really miserable no doubt. When I got pregnant I took advantage of eating for two and allowed myself to let myself go because pregnancy makes you gain weight anyway so why not indulge? I gained 30 lb total and immediately lost 18 lb overnight after giving birth. Then I ate less (than my indulgent pregnancy diet) after getting out of the hospital and slowly ate more. It's been 3 years now, I'm eating more than ever and my weight is still lower than pre-pregnancy. I think my metabolism got a reset so pregnancy actually rejuvenated my body!
  • Rhiana1188
    Rhiana1188 Posts: 67 Member
    Options
    I'm not offended, and I have stretchmarks galore, not to mention loose, sagging skin at the bottom of my stomach that will never go away without surgery. I still managed to get the actual point of what she posted, rather than twisting it into something it wasn't. I'd be lying if I said I wasn't jealous that she didn't get stretchmarks or loose skin, but I don't hold it against her or the intent of her post. Neither should anyone else, because it's not fair to do so. Would you hold it against someone who had done the same thing if they had stretchmarks / loose skin / separated abdominal muscles? I highly doubt it.

    Exactly, I am not sure why so many were offended. She is proud of what she did, I am jealous she did it so quickly....but hey good for her. It is motivation for me, my youngest is over two and I am just now getting my self in shape. I understand what the OP meant, and I don't think she was being rude.

    Well I'm really glad for you that you guys have no insecurities about your bodies and that you took no offense to OP's blanket presumption. Kudos to you for being the bigger person.
  • Beezil
    Beezil Posts: 1,677 Member
    Options
    I'm not offended, and I have stretchmarks galore, not to mention loose, sagging skin at the bottom of my stomach that will never go away without surgery. I still managed to get the actual point of what she posted, rather than twisting it into something it wasn't. I'd be lying if I said I wasn't jealous that she didn't get stretchmarks or loose skin, but I don't hold it against her or the intent of her post. Neither should anyone else, because it's not fair to do so. Would you hold it against someone who had done the same thing if they had stretchmarks / loose skin / separated abdominal muscles? I highly doubt it.

    Exactly, I am not sure why so many were offended. She is proud of what she did, I am jealous she did it so quickly....but hey good for her. It is motivation for me, my youngest is over two and I am just now getting my self in shape. I understand what the OP meant, and I don't think she was being rude.

    Well I'm really glad for you that you guys have no insecurities about your bodies and that you took no offense to OP's blanket presumption. Kudos to you for being the bigger person.

    I don't know if that's sarcasm or not, but I'll give the benefit of a doubt to you and say thanks.

    However, I've always had insecurities about my body, still do, though they have become considerably less and less severe since I started taking care of myself. Working out and eating right has improved my body tremendously, as well as my outlook on life and my confidence. But there are still days I look in the mirror and hate what I see.
  • KatLifter
    KatLifter Posts: 1,314 Member
    Options

    I don't know if that's sarcasm or not, but I'll give the benefit of a doubt to you and say thanks.

    However, I've always had insecurities about my body, still do, though they have become considerably less and less severe since I started taking care of myself. Working out and eating right has improved my body tremendously, as well as my outlook on life and my confidence. But there are still days I look in the mirror and hate what I see.

    baby.gif
This discussion has been closed.