Wedding Costs- Cash Bar or Open Bar?

Options
1…457910

Replies

  • MelHoneyRocks
    MelHoneyRocks Posts: 223
    Options
    I think since you are on a budget that going with the wine & beer is very generous.
    Congrats!!
  • gogojodee
    gogojodee Posts: 1,261 Member
    Options
    paying for your own in early 20's? hell, your guests are lucky you didn't send them a postcard with a pic from the JOP asking for "we just got married" presents.

    Do what make the most financial sense.

    Haha, this, seriously. Ask away.
  • gogojodee
    gogojodee Posts: 1,261 Member
    Options
    IMO, I think a cash bar is tacky. I have never been to a wedding where I had to pay for drinks but that is how it is done where I live. If cash bars a typically an option and that is how it is done where you are then I would say it is fine because your guests wouldn't find it unheard of. Another option could be to just offer beer and wine or maybe rent a venue that allows you to bring in your alcohol to keep your cost lower.

    I agree. My aunt had a cash bar when I was in HS, no one paid, haha. The reception sucked and her new guy was the DJ. Blah. Even though she divorced her 1st - he is still my Uncle Cal. lol
  • TylerJ76
    TylerJ76 Posts: 4,375 Member
    Options
    What is with everyone's thoughts of entitlement that they shouldn't have to pay for booze, but the bride and groom should?

    *shakes head*
  • ValerieMartini2Olives
    ValerieMartini2Olives Posts: 3,041 Member
    Options
    I get really annoyed when I go to a wedding and it's not an open bar. I don't care if it's not top shelf, just be open. I spend big bucks on your gift (as did everyone else) and cleared aside my little personal time to come to your day (as did everyone else). The least you can do is give me some free booze.

    Thats cheap of you... You are going to a Wedding to celebrate the beginning of someone's life together. Its not about you. This is THEIR day, not yours. And really what you spend on a gift is kind of irrelevant if the Wedding bankrupts the couple.

    So you set aside a little of your personal time? They thought enough of you to include you on the guest list. They want you there to celebrate their love. If you want to cheap out, or don't think enough of the couple getting married that its some kind of burden, Don't Go.

    Your response is just so tacky. Not everyone has money to burn especially after putting together a Wedding.

    My parents have been wedding DJ's for well over 30 years. I have been to literally hundreds of wedding receptions. When a couple has already put $40,000 into a wedding, you're telling me they can't spare a couple hundred to have an open bar?
  • randomtai
    randomtai Posts: 9,003 Member
    Options
    I've been to 10 weddings in the past 2 years. I can tell you a couple of things:
    Weddings without booze need to give people a heads up
    Weddings with booze that you pay for will be talked about in a bad way
    Weddings with booze that is free will be remembered well even if the guests are drunk enough to forget.

    This. :flowerforyou:
  • TylerJ76
    TylerJ76 Posts: 4,375 Member
    Options
    I've been to 10 weddings in the past 2 years. I can tell you a couple of things:
    Weddings without booze need to give people a heads up
    Weddings with booze that you pay for will be talked about in a bad way
    Weddings with booze that is free will be remembered well even if the guests are drunk enough to forget.

    This. :flowerforyou:

    Really, so you would talk bad about a reception that made you pay for your OWN booze??
  • randomtai
    randomtai Posts: 9,003 Member
    Options
    I've been to 10 weddings in the past 2 years. I can tell you a couple of things:
    Weddings without booze need to give people a heads up
    Weddings with booze that you pay for will be talked about in a bad way
    Weddings with booze that is free will be remembered well even if the guests are drunk enough to forget.

    This. :flowerforyou:

    Really, so you would talk bad about a reception that made you pay for your OWN booze??

    Yup it's pretty tacky to me.
  • TylerJ76
    TylerJ76 Posts: 4,375 Member
    Options
    I've been to 10 weddings in the past 2 years. I can tell you a couple of things:
    Weddings without booze need to give people a heads up
    Weddings with booze that you pay for will be talked about in a bad way
    Weddings with booze that is free will be remembered well even if the guests are drunk enough to forget.

    This. :flowerforyou:

    Really, so you would talk bad about a reception that made you pay for your OWN booze??

    Yup it's pretty tacky to me.

    :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
  • christine24t
    christine24t Posts: 6,064 Member
    Options
    I've never been to a wedding that required me to pay for my own drinks. You're the one throwing the party, you should be the one footing the bill. If you can't afford an open bar, pare it down to something within your budget.

    Agreed.
    Either do an open bar, or a bar with beer/wine options plus a few simple liquors (rail-type liquors) and a few mixers. My suggestions: whiskey, gin, vodka, rum, tequila, and sweet and dry vermouth, maybe scotch if you feel like it, plus a few different kinds of pop, tonic, soda water, sweet and sour. Just have one brand of each liquor. That way you can make a ton of different mixed drinks for cheaper.
  • Lovestoscrapbook
    Lovestoscrapbook Posts: 295 Member
    Options
    My husband and I paid for our own wedding and did it on a budget as well. We ordered 2 kegs of beer and had unlimited soda. Mixed drinks were a cash bar and once the beer ran out, they could order from the bar (or they could order if they didn't like our selection). Remember the purpose of the day is to celebrate the love for both of you and share in your happiness. Whatever you choose will be the right choice - but it will be better if you don't have the stress of unneeded debt hanging over your head.
  • KaidaKantri
    KaidaKantri Posts: 401
    Options
    I got engaged this past December. Our Wedding day is May 31st 2014. Possibly put off your wedding for a couple years to save up, would help. I see so many people that get too stressed over a wedding. I'm happy I'm having 2 and a half years to plan it! (1 year 10 months now, but we've already got a LOT figured out!)
  • KaidaKantri
    KaidaKantri Posts: 401
    Options
    I got engaged this past December. Our Wedding day is May 31st 2014. Possibly put off your wedding for a couple years to save up, would help. I see so many people that get too stressed over a wedding. I'm happy I'm having 2 and a half years to plan it! (1 year 10 months now, but we've already got a LOT figured out!)

    We are having an open bar though. .:)
  • randomtai
    randomtai Posts: 9,003 Member
    Options
    I got engaged this past December. Our Wedding day is May 31st 2014. Possibly put off your wedding for a couple years to save up, would help. I see so many people that get too stressed over a wedding. I'm happy I'm having 2 and a half years to plan it! (1 year 10 months now, but we've already got a LOT figured out!)

    We are having an open bar though. .:)

    :drinker:
  • EndlessSacrifice
    EndlessSacrifice Posts: 325
    Options
    I would go with unlimited beer and wine, everything else you pay for.
  • amazon75
    amazon75 Posts: 165
    Options
    How about beer and wine and a signature cocktail, maybe in your wedding color.
  • megleo818
    megleo818 Posts: 595 Member
    Options
    Sorry I didn't read any answers posted, because there are pages of them, but when I got married we had wine on the tables (we bought reasonably-priced wine we liked at BevMo and paid corkage -- still cheaper than paying our reception venue their wine prices). Both red and white. The wait staff replaced the bottles as they were emptied. We also served champagne for a toast. Anything other than that was available for guests to buy at the bar. We ended up with left-over wine, which we happily drank over the first few months of our new marriage -- worked nicely.

    Editing to say that we didn't put a pay bar in the reception room. The actual sit-down bar that's part of the hotel was right across the patio from the rooms where we were -- folks could comfortably hang out and eat and drink their wine (or sodas, which we also supplied) in our reception space, or if they really wanted a cosmo or something, they could go across to the bar and get one.

    It should be said that we made this decision both because it was less expensive than serving unlimited drinks, and also because we didn't want anyone getting sloppy drunk at our reception. It's good to keep in mind that some people don't know how to hold back when the alcohol is free. Hey, we've all been there, haven't we?? LOL

    Congrats on your upcoming wedding and good luck!
  • Sarah_thefatmom
    Sarah_thefatmom Posts: 30
    Options
    We paid for our wedding ourselves and were on a VERY tight budget! We chose a cash bar and I have no regrets about it!

    - I should add that our Reception location did not allow us to bring any of our own drinks in (everything had to be purchased by their bar), If we were allowed we probably would have added a keg and wine bottles for each table.
  • dietanderson
    dietanderson Posts: 18
    Options
    If Im invited then I vote for Open Bar. If not, then let the *kitten* pay!
  • norabeth
    norabeth Posts: 176 Member
    Options
    My husband and I got married a year ago this Sunday. We did a destination wedding g in Maui and ha a reception when we came home. We paid for our weddingnourselfs and spent less than $15,000 total. We were engaged for 14 months.
    At our reception we had champagne for toasting, beer, margaritas and mai tai's. We only had about 55 people total. Kept it small and rock in. I would think about what your family drinks the most. My family are beer drinkers first then comes tequila. My husband wanted mai tai's thinking since our party was luau themed people would mainly drink them. Nearly 1year later I still have 6 bottles or rum and 4 bottles of mai tai mix.

    My best advice would be make a budget spreadsheet. Nerdy I know but extremely helpful. Splurge where it counts like photos and the honeymoon. Save on the dress. Avoid charging anything if possible.

    Also bridal shows are a great way to find caterors, cake person, photographers ect.

Categories