Want fiance to lift... but... he isn't motivated.

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  • gshoemaker06
    gshoemaker06 Posts: 264 Member
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    Ignore the hostility and all the trolls w/ their fancy gif googling ;-)

    It's completely understandable that you want him to look his best. You're his freaking significant other! That's what SOs do! They support the one they love and want them to be happy, but also to be the best person they can be. That means being healthy mentally and physically.

    She said that he USED to lift weights a lot, so she obviously knows he enjoys it! Seems like his only excuse is that he's tired after work. Does he have a lunch hour he can lift on? I eat at my desk then go to the gym during lunch, that way if I feel lazy at night I don't feel bad about skipping a workout in the evening.

    Iub8V.gif
  • 55AngelH55
    55AngelH55 Posts: 117
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    Hey.
    I already know how badly this will turn out for me. I have prepped w/ a tarp for the tomato-throwing.

    My fiance and I are getting married in Feb. He used to work out ALL the time, and did a moderate amount of body-building.
    I'd like for him to do a little bit with that again between now and then for the wedding pictures - we're going to Miami for our honeymoon, and intend to do a photoshoot there.
    That's what's motivating me to get the weight loss done! :)
    I've mentioned it to him a few times, and he says he's too tired after work to work-out, and that he walks around all the time for work, so he doesn't need the cardio. (He's in car sales)

    So, from the men in the room... (or ladies in similar situations):
    How can I motivate him to do a little lifting between now and then? I'd just like him to tone up a little, but I don't want to hurt his feelings.

    Well, you're such a cutie. I'm sure he'll respond just fine to your suggesting he get off of his lazy fat *kitten* and get into the gym. But still, make sure you really emphasize how you love him just the way he is BUT that he should do it for himself at your humble request. It'll be fine.....I'm certain he will not be even more self conscious. Oh, and if I dont get to talk to you before then, congrats on the marriage.....he's a lucky m'fer.

    Thank you for the advice, compliment, understanding, and congratulations! :)
  • 55AngelH55
    55AngelH55 Posts: 117
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    Ignore the hostility and all the trolls w/ their fancy gif googling ;-)

    It's completely understandable that you want him to look his best. You're his freaking significant other! That's what SOs do! They support the one they love and want them to be happy, but also to be the best person they can be. That means being healthy mentally and physically.

    She said that he USED to lift weights a lot, so she obviously knows he enjoys it! Seems like his only excuse is that he's tired after work. Does he have a lunch hour he can lift on? I eat at my desk then go to the gym during lunch, that way if I feel lazy at night I don't feel bad about skipping a workout in the evening.

    Iub8V.gif

    :-) Thank you! :)
  • kolraw
    kolraw Posts: 42 Member
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    I am going to put my two cents in here. My wife is a fitness queen, teaches multiple classes, isn't happy unless she has worked out, etc. She has been trying to get me motivated to go to the gym/workout for years. Quite honestly, it bugs the heck out of me because I feel like she is criticizing me but I really know she isn't. I personally don't like going with her because I know I can't keep up with her in some areas. I can kick her butt at spinning though. :wink:

    From my own experience, I would find something you can do for him that he loves which you don't do very often. Make his favorite dinner, buy him sports tickets, etc. After he goes to the gym with you get/do that thing for him. Don't tell him about the whole reward thing, just do it for him. If he asks why tell him but if he doesn't ask, don't bother.

    I really do like the idea of asking him to go with you because you need his help. Guys like feeling needed.

    Hope that helps a bit.
  • 55AngelH55
    55AngelH55 Posts: 117
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    I am going to put my two cents in here. My wife is a fitness queen, teaches multiple classes, isn't happy unless she has worked out, etc. She has been trying to get me motivated to go to the gym/workout for years. Quite honestly, it bugs the heck out of me because I feel like she is criticizing me but I really know she isn't. I personally don't like going with her because I know I can't keep up with her in some areas. I can kick her butt at spinning though. :wink:

    From my own experience, I would find something you can do for him that he loves which you don't do very often. Make his favorite dinner, buy him sports tickets, etc. After he goes to the gym with you get/do that thing for him. Don't tell him about the whole reward thing, just do it for him. If he asks why tell him but if he doesn't ask, don't bother.

    I really do like the idea of asking him to go with you because you need his help. Guys like feeling needed.

    Hope that helps a bit.

    Thanks!
  • EmilyOfTheSun
    EmilyOfTheSun Posts: 1,548 Member
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    I don't think I understand the question...?
    We booked it together.
    We do everything together.
    I love him a lot, and I have no personal problem w/ his body - and he has no personal problem w/ mine.
    I want to get in shape for myself so I can enjoy looking at all these pictures throughout the next 100 years.
    I know he won't enjoy them as much if he doesn't do a little toning between now and then.
    He admits that he should.
    Just says he's too tired.


    I'm confused, I think, by all the hostility.
    Does anyone know how to delete the thread alltogether?

    Oh honey, people on these forums can be real A HOLES! I totally get your question. Don't worry about these people who are bored at work and have nothing better to do than put others down. I wish I could offer you a suggestion but my BF has no interest in working out so I have given up. Doesn't bother me and he isn't really bothered by how he looks in photos so it doesn't matter in my case. Don't delete the thread...you've gotten some good tips and hopefully more will come.
  • PantalaNagaPampa
    PantalaNagaPampa Posts: 1,031 Member
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    Speaking as a Pu$$y whipped husband, this techique works. My wife holds her kitty hostage like a miltant terrorist group to get what she wants, when she wants it bad enough. And, she doens't beat around the bush about it (pun intended) she will out right say, No more pu$$y unitl..... and shlt gets done!

    As long as that works for your marriage. I wouldn't be married to a man like that. Fidel Castro would fear me, I'd be out of control.
    Well, I could just be a douche and take what the F@ck I wanted. I am twice her size, but then you would say you would never be with a guy like that either. Me thinks you would never be with any guy like anything.... I am also confused on the statement of Castro would fear you, either you want a strong man who wont let you get away with *kitten* or you want a guy who wll cater to you, which is it. Either way I know what works for my marriage, love my wife, worhsip her like a Goddess, she is happy, I am happy and restreining orders don't have to be issued for me choking a Bltch out, which I could see me doing if I was married to you.
  • corn63
    corn63 Posts: 1,580 Member
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    Speaking as a Pu$$y whipped husband, this techique works. My wife holds her kitty hostage like a miltant terrorist group to get what she wants, when she wants it bad enough. And, she doens't beat around the bush about it (pun intended) she will out right say, No more pu$$y unitl..... and shlt gets done!

    As long as that works for your marriage. I wouldn't be married to a man like that. Fidel Castro would fear me, I'd be out of control.
    Well, I could just be a douche and take what the F@ck I wanted. I am twice her size, but then I you would say you would never be with a guy like that either. Me thinks you would never be with any guy like anything.... I am also confused on the statemen of Castro would fear you, either you want a strong man who wont let you get away with **** or you want a guy who wll cater to you, which is it. Either way I know what works for my marriage, love my wife, worhsip her like a Goddess, she is happy, I am happy and restreining orders don't have to be issued for choking a Bltch out, which I could see me doing if I was married to you.

    Like I said, as long as it works for you, Nancy :)
  • 55AngelH55
    55AngelH55 Posts: 117
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    Speaking as a Pu$$y whipped husband, this techique works. My wife holds her kitty hostage like a miltant terrorist group to get what she wants, when she wants it bad enough. And, she doens't beat around the bush about it (pun intended) she will out right say, No more pu$$y unitl..... and shlt gets done!

    As long as that works for your marriage. I wouldn't be married to a man like that. Fidel Castro would fear me, I'd be out of control.
    Well, I could just be a douche and take what the F@ck I wanted. I am twice her size, but then I you would say you would never be with a guy like that either. Me thinks you would never be with any guy like anything.... I am also confused on the statemen of Castro would fear you, either you want a strong man who wont let you get away with **** or you want a guy who wll cater to you, which is it. Either way I know what works for my marriage, love my wife, worhsip her like a Goddess, she is happy, I am happy and restreining orders don't have to be issued for choking a Bltch out, which I could see me doing if I was married to you.

    Like I said, as long as it works for you, Nancy :)

    tumblr_m69jc1Awl91r79k32.gif
  • pastryari
    pastryari Posts: 8,646 Member
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    Good god, the gifs on this thread are so full of win.
  • PantalaNagaPampa
    PantalaNagaPampa Posts: 1,031 Member
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    Speaking as a Pu$$y whipped husband, this techique works. My wife holds her kitty hostage like a miltant terrorist group to get what she wants, when she wants it bad enough. And, she doens't beat around the bush about it (pun intended) she will out right say, No more pu$$y unitl..... and shlt gets done!

    As long as that works for your marriage. I wouldn't be married to a man like that. Fidel Castro would fear me, I'd be out of control.
    Well, I could just be a douche and take what the F@ck I wanted. I am twice her size, but then I you would say you would never be with a guy like that either. Me thinks you would never be with any guy like anything.... I am also confused on the statemen of Castro would fear you, either you want a strong man who wont let you get away with **** or you want a guy who wll cater to you, which is it. Either way I know what works for my marriage, love my wife, worhsip her like a Goddess, she is happy, I am happy and restreining orders don't have to be issued for choking a Bltch out, which I could see me doing if I was married to you.

    Like I said, as long as it works for you, Nancy :)
    that it does, proves there is someone for everyone, well almost everyone.. sad face for you :sad: . no worries even though Castro is dead, I am sure he would have feared you.. good call on that one, Butch!

    Now, let's play some more troll games, even if you obviously have the upper hand.
  • corn63
    corn63 Posts: 1,580 Member
    Options

    Speaking as a Pu$$y whipped husband, this techique works. My wife holds her kitty hostage like a miltant terrorist group to get what she wants, when she wants it bad enough. And, she doens't beat around the bush about it (pun intended) she will out right say, No more pu$$y unitl..... and shlt gets done!

    As long as that works for your marriage. I wouldn't be married to a man like that. Fidel Castro would fear me, I'd be out of control.
    Well, I could just be a douche and take what the F@ck I wanted. I am twice her size, but then I you would say you would never be with a guy like that either. Me thinks you would never be with any guy like anything.... I am also confused on the statemen of Castro would fear you, either you want a strong man who wont let you get away with **** or you want a guy who wll cater to you, which is it. Either way I know what works for my marriage, love my wife, worhsip her like a Goddess, she is happy, I am happy and restreining orders don't have to be issued for choking a Bltch out, which I could see me doing if I was married to you.

    Like I said, as long as it works for you, Nancy :)
    that it does, proves there is someone for everyone, well almost everyone.. sad face for you :sad: . no worries even though Castro is dead, I am sure he would have feared you.. good call on that one, Butch!

    Now, let's play some more troll games, even if you obviously have the upper hand.

    Haha, you're pretty amusing. Tell me more about my life. You know so much!
  • Happylady123
    Happylady123 Posts: 166 Member
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    You cannot force someone do to something which requires such effort and mental focus as training if they don't want to.

    Sorry, but he has to want to do it himself.

    I agree with this guy. I would like for my hubby to care more about his health, too, but so far not a lot has changed.
  • 55AngelH55
    55AngelH55 Posts: 117
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    Good god, the gifs on this thread are so full of win.

    tumblr_m4oz49JBh91r79k32.gif
  • PantalaNagaPampa
    PantalaNagaPampa Posts: 1,031 Member
    Options

    Speaking as a Pu$$y whipped husband, this techique works. My wife holds her kitty hostage like a miltant terrorist group to get what she wants, when she wants it bad enough. And, she doens't beat around the bush about it (pun intended) she will out right say, No more pu$$y unitl..... and shlt gets done!

    As long as that works for your marriage. I wouldn't be married to a man like that. Fidel Castro would fear me, I'd be out of control.
    Well, I could just be a douche and take what the F@ck I wanted. I am twice her size, but then I you would say you would never be with a guy like that either. Me thinks you would never be with any guy like anything.... I am also confused on the statemen of Castro would fear you, either you want a strong man who wont let you get away with **** or you want a guy who wll cater to you, which is it. Either way I know what works for my marriage, love my wife, worhsip her like a Goddess, she is happy, I am happy and restreining orders don't have to be issued for choking a Bltch out, which I could see me doing if I was married to you.

    Like I said, as long as it works for you, Nancy :)
    that it does, proves there is someone for everyone, well almost everyone.. sad face for you :sad: . no worries even though Castro is dead, I am sure he would have feared you.. good call on that one, Butch!

    Now, let's play some more troll games, even if you obviously have the upper hand.

    Haha, you're pretty amusing. Tell me more about my life. You know so much!
    Well, obviously I am only guessing at most parts, since you are one of those super hot, in demand women that have to keep their profiles private, you know, to keep all the gawker stalker creepers away. Wtih that I can only summize from your responses that life has not been overly kind to you. I am so sorry if someone along the way has hurt your feelbads :flowerforyou:
  • odusgolp
    odusgolp Posts: 10,477 Member
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    aYKxg.gif
  • 55AngelH55
    55AngelH55 Posts: 117
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    tumblr_m4gb0rsKaZ1r79k32.gif
  • NostalgicMuse
    NostalgicMuse Posts: 340 Member
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    Honestly, as funny as this thread is (and let me tell you, it is FUNNY!) if he doesn't have the motivation right now, you have to deal with that. YOU HAVE THE MOTIVATION. Keep going. He will see you doing all you're doing and be proud of you. THAT looks damn good on a man. And maybe your example will motivate him- but if it doesn't, don't bash him, don't pester him, don't lecture or nag him. You chose him. (well, almost) and you can still have a great time, amazing photos and a really fabulous life with the man you love that loves you back because of your support and devotion.

    Best wishes for your wedding and honeymoon!
  • magj0y
    magj0y Posts: 1,911 Member
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    Speaking as a Pu$$y whipped husband, this techique works. My wife holds her kitty hostage like a miltant terrorist group to get what she wants, when she wants it bad enough. And, she doens't beat around the bush about it (pun intended) she will out right say, No more pu$$y unitl..... and shlt gets done!

    As long as that works for your marriage. I wouldn't be married to a man like that. Fidel Castro would fear me, I'd be out of control.
    Well, I could just be a douche and take what the F@ck I wanted. I am twice her size, but then you would say you would never be with a guy like that either. Me thinks you would never be with any guy like anything.... I am also confused on the statement of Castro would fear you, either you want a strong man who wont let you get away with *kitten* or you want a guy who wll cater to you, which is it. Either way I know what works for my marriage, love my wife, worhsip her like a Goddess, she is happy, I am happy and restreining orders don't have to be issued for me choking a Bltch out, which I could see me doing if I was married to you.

    HAH! damned funny. Glad you figured out how to make your marriage work.
  • Capt_Apollo
    Capt_Apollo Posts: 9,026 Member
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    dump him. i'm sure you'll find someone else to put up with you.

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