Partner hates me using MFP :(

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  • Annzatgoal
    Annzatgoal Posts: 16 Member
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    I'd say it depends on how much time you spend on logging your food. Do you feel compelled to take your salad apart, logging every slice of cucumber, radish and lettuce leaf? And do you jump up before the two of you have finished eating to do your food diary, or worse yet, do you sit at the computer while you are eating, logging it in? I speak from experience here!

    Also, if you are putting together meals that takes just minor tweaking, (say, if you chose to have an orange instead of an apple for your fruit), then that cuts back on the time considerably. Under the meal section, I also did put the ingredients for a tossed salad with my fave dressing, since I eat that fairly regularly, and that makes it easy to add to whatever else I'm eating.

    Another thought...ask him to describe why he thinks what you are doing is obsessive. He could be right, or on the other hand, he could profit from your explanation. Best wishes!
  • fairestthings
    fairestthings Posts: 335 Member
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    Man, mine would be out on the damn street if he EVER criticized me for doing something that worked.

    Lol on the damn street for questioning her actions!

    He may well be the nicest guy in the world who questioned whether her actions were a little obsessive. That's it! It's all over! How dare he!

    Why did you and your partner split up, affair?
    No he is totally trustworthy
    'did he beat you?'
    No way, as gentle as a lamb
    'gamble away your money?'
    No, he's great with money
    Nasty to your friends?
    Oh no, they all think he's great

    What then?
    Well he expressed concerns about me becoming too obsessive about the calories
    OUT ON THE DAMN STREET!!!

    LMAO

    ROFL!!
  • NursRatchett
    NursRatchett Posts: 39 Member
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    He sounds a bit immature and controlling.....do what you like, if it helps you!
  • dhicks137
    dhicks137 Posts: 10 Member
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    I agree with Eileen. I find that it helps to pre-plan my meals early in the day and adjust accordingly as needed...
  • MikkLuhnRozzWhuh
    MikkLuhnRozzWhuh Posts: 240 Member
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    My partner and I have just had a huge row over me using MFP - he says it is making me obsessive and doesn't understand why I can't just eat healthily and exercise like 'normal people'. I log everything, down to a mint or cup of coffee, and he thinks it is crazy. I love MFP, it helps me stay on track and I know that without it I would over eat because I wouldn't be so conscious, but now I am thinking maybe I should stop using it and see how I go just estimating calories and exercise - or as he suggests stop thinking about it and just 'exercise and stay away from burgers' - what do you guys think? Anyone ever feel like logging everything is a bit obsessive?

    No...he thinks it's just a walk in the park. Tell him to get over himself and stop getting in your business. It's your body and your health and you'll take care of it how you please.
  • pwittek10
    pwittek10 Posts: 723 Member
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    But this is a very positive compulsive behavior!
    (My husband and I were just talking about this!
    He doesn't log in or anything but knows I do and fully supports me
    for doing it.)
  • AngelAtkins61
    AngelAtkins61 Posts: 52 Member
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    TIME FOR A NEW SUPPORTIVE PARTNER! TELL HIM TO KISS OFF!
  • amyowens08
    amyowens08 Posts: 107 Member
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    Tell him to go screw..it's your body, your goals, your life. Do what works for you.
  • di2losew8
    di2losew8 Posts: 131 Member
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    Is he jealous of your success with MFP? I would not try to guess at anything I'm eating because chances are I won't get it right especial if there is no nutritional info. But there has got to be a reason for his objection to MFP. You are not obsessed to the point of ignoring him are you? I mean does he feel like you chose this site over him? He should praise you for finding something that keeps you healthy and in his life longer. Maybe he could benefit from using this site.
  • LeggyAmericanGirl
    LeggyAmericanGirl Posts: 285 Member
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    Logging mints sounds obsessive to me. I chew gum all day and im not logging it. I don't think food is bad its just bad if you eat too much and don't exercise / move. I think once you get your nutrition down and get comfortable eating the proper foods you don't need to log everything. One day here or there going over your goal is actually good for you.

    I don't log every little thing nor do I log every day. Its easy to become obsessed with food macros, exercise calories, body weight, etc.

    Sounds like hes feeling left out if you are spending a lot of time on the computer. Try to include him or try to log things at time that doesnt seem like your whole day is being on the computer logging food and such.
  • sjbrenda
    sjbrenda Posts: 4 Member
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    You are smart to log every BLT ( bites , licks & taste) they can really add up
  • jezabell1123
    jezabell1123 Posts: 1
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    isn't the average "normal person" american considered obese lately? our country is in a health crisis right now. i applaud anyone on here. stick with it. ppl lose weight differently and for different reasons. don't be discouraged!
    :smile:
  • Pimpmonkey
    Pimpmonkey Posts: 566
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    My partner and I have just had a huge row over me using MFP - he says it is making me obsessive and doesn't understand why I can't just eat healthily and exercise like 'normal people'. I log everything, down to a mint or cup of coffee, and he thinks it is crazy. I love MFP, it helps me stay on track and I know that without it I would over eat because I wouldn't be so conscious, but now I am thinking maybe I should stop using it and see how I go just estimating calories and exercise - or as he suggests stop thinking about it and just 'exercise and stay away from burgers' - what do you guys think? Anyone ever feel like logging everything is a bit obsessive?

    He's probably actually just worried about what is going to happen when you reach the end of your journey and about who you might meet on here with the same goals as you that you might decide to run away with. People get insecure sometimes. It might help to reassure him that you aren't doing this for anyone other than yourself and that you are not planning on leaving once you reach your goal.
  • liittlesparrow
    liittlesparrow Posts: 209 Member
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    Talk to him about it and try to explain that it's not that you are obsessive, it's just something you are very passionate about and something you care about. :)
  • been285
    been285 Posts: 99 Member
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    IF obsessive means you make your goal weight,,,,,, THEN be obsessive.
  • lovesbikes
    lovesbikes Posts: 26 Member
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    - Are you spending too much time on MFP and he is not getting enough attention from you ?

    - Is he insecure ?

    - You could also tell him facts like people who strictly note down what they eat are 15% more likely to loose weight that people who just exercise. But I doubt if this will help your situation mostly likely it is one of the above.
  • ash190489
    ash190489 Posts: 587 Member
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    I began my journey not long before you - 4th January 2012 and initially it is an exciting new tool whereby I would do the same by logging every little thing and on the forums 24/7! I would have my scales out on the bench and weigh everything and my diet dictated my meals each day - particularly dinner. Now my partner gave me his full support, but I could see and he did mention a few times the repetitiveness of 'our' dinner meals and even with him having more or something else extra on his plate, they were getting a bit bland and boring (considering he didn't want to lose weight, he is trying to put on weight/muscle). So I could sympathise sometimes, and I also had to support him as he was supporting me. Luckily I wasn't (and still not) extreme in terms of 'eating clean' - I like to just eat healthily, enjoy a burger or pizza slice etc every now and then as I want to still enjoy life and join in on social gatherings, I just try to watch my portion sizes and I still log everything (on the very odd occasion I may not log just so I can really enjoy myself with my friends rather than thinking about "how many cals in that" and on my phone every 10 mins! It's not about going CRAZY but I can if I really want to.

    I would just sit down with him and speak reasonably to him. Tell him your goals and why you're doing this (even if he already knows it) and ask him straight up why it is bothering him so much. You'll lose the weight a lot easier and a lot more happily if you can sympathise with each other and work out a plan or strategy together in order to you both being happy. If you feel it's more of a self-conscious thing and he's worried he's going to lose you if you drop the pounds, then I would reassure him of your feelings and tell him this is something you're doing for your own self confidence etc.

    Good luck. :smile:
  • ZeroWoIf
    ZeroWoIf Posts: 588 Member
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    My partner and I have just had a huge row over me using MFP - he says it is making me obsessive and doesn't understand why I can't just eat healthily and exercise like 'normal people'. I log everything, down to a mint or cup of coffee, and he thinks it is crazy. I love MFP, it helps me stay on track and I know that without it I would over eat because I wouldn't be so conscious, but now I am thinking maybe I should stop using it and see how I go just estimating calories and exercise - or as he suggests stop thinking about it and just 'exercise and stay away from burgers' - what do you guys think? Anyone ever feel like logging everything is a bit obsessive?

    I don't know what is going in your mind. If you are dealing with mental illnesses then you may want to talk to a doctor. Looks like you found your compulsive disorder using this service.
  • AntWrig
    AntWrig Posts: 2,273 Member
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    My partner and I have just had a huge row over me using MFP - he says it is making me obsessive and doesn't understand why I can't just eat healthily and exercise like 'normal people'. I log everything, down to a mint or cup of coffee, and he thinks it is crazy. I love MFP, it helps me stay on track and I know that without it I would over eat because I wouldn't be so conscious, but now I am thinking maybe I should stop using it and see how I go just estimating calories and exercise - or as he suggests stop thinking about it and just 'exercise and stay away from burgers' - what do you guys think? Anyone ever feel like logging everything is a bit obsessive?
    He is right. I rarely log coffee. A mint? Are you serious? Only log stuff that really matters. Unless you're eating pounds of mints, there is no need. If your coffee has a tsp of cream in it then dont worry about logging. A cup of coffee with 50 cals of cream will not halt weight loss. Mind you that's alot of cream in one cup.

    Now, if you're drinking 10 cups a day, then thats 500 calories. Log it. 1 to 2 cups a day? Don't even bother.
  • marthe_irene
    marthe_irene Posts: 4 Member
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    Well this is just my opinion. I wasn't logging all those hidden calories and I was wondering why I wasn't losing. I went to visit my sister and we entered everything we ate and cream and sugar in our coffee and yes even our mints. After I started entereing everything I started losing. I also started walking a bit more.
    I relapsed this summer and didn't do very well.but I'm back on track. Going to Jamaica in December and I just need to lose at least 12 lbs., 16 would surely be better and my clothes would fit much better and of course I would feel better.
    Drinking more water is another big factor. If you drink at least 4 glasses of water it will increase your metabolism.
    Good luck in your weight loss journey and just be true to you.

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