Why did you let yourself go?...

12467…10

Replies

  • wilted6orchid
    wilted6orchid Posts: 423 Member
    Two things.
    I love sugary/sweet things.
    I don't run and play all day anymore.
    Boom, I hit highschool and the weight started adding up...I've gotten bigger and bigger the older I get.
    My 5 sons are all 20 months apart and the youngest is 6 mo. old. I've got to dig my heels in and start heading the other way.:noway:
  • LilacDaffodil
    LilacDaffodil Posts: 148 Member
    Prozac - as soon as I started taking the stuff the weight piled on, Same thing happened to a couple of the other girls in my counselling group. Tried to get my GP to change my drugs, he insisted 'people use Prozac to lose weight' and I was just comfort eating (I wasn't). My metabolism has been knackered ever since.
  • walkdmc
    walkdmc Posts: 529 Member
    I was a binge eater. I developed the binging habit when I was young and continued into my adult years. The binging numbed everything including my sense of pride and self-worth. There was a huge disconnect between my body and mind.

    It was a weird time in my life that lasted 20+ years. I would see a number on the scale that was 100+ pounds above my ideal weight and it felt bad but didn't really register, like it wasn't my body.

    I also know once someone is overweight, there are various hormonal changes that take place that kill your hunger and full sensations. So, it's a vicious positive feedback loop of eating, weight gain, more eating, etc.
  • 29andfat
    29andfat Posts: 30
    For me it was a constant effort to try and lose weight drastically and as quickly as possible that led to me continually gaining weight over a period of about 10 years. I'd try and drop weight quickly, then I would fail, and then I would eat badly for a while because I'd go through a phase of not giving a crap. It happened so gradually that I would become accustomed to my fatness so that just gaining a little bit more each time didn't freak me out too much. It's only when you look at your current weight and how much you weighed before you had weight issues that you think, whoa - how did that happen?

    You'd think at some point I would have said enough is enough, because I was always aware of how much I weighed, but it wasn't until a couple of weeks ago when I reached the point of no return and finally decided to be sensible and lose weight slowly through better food choices and consistent exercise. I don't know why it took me this long to decide to commit to a 'lifestyle change' instead of just going on one crash diet after the next.
  • NavyKnightAh13
    NavyKnightAh13 Posts: 1,394 Member
    Most of my life was "well i am always going to be fat, so why bother trying?" By the time I was in 6th grade (after a move from Cleveland to Ashland OH) my weight shot up from 125 to 175 (50lbs in a year from the age of10 1/2 years old until i was 11)

    then i got to high school, was told my curves weren't int he right spots, and that i was never good enough for a guy to even be with. One guy pretended to "date" me then broke up because I wasn't "pretty enough".

    Well, when i got to college, between school, home (I was taking care of my disabled mom to the day she passed) work and band i barely ate and thought "maybe i will lose weight this way" but never did. I also thought to myself "what guy is going to care to have me anyway?" "why should i care, i will never be beautiful or attractive enough."

    After my mom died, it was eating fast food all the time, never exercising, and gaming. Once I moved to where i now live (Ashland to Fremont OH) my weight stayed the same, and though my husband loves me no matter what weight I am, I have had to learn to love myself, which somedays I will admit I don't, but I think about what I have accomplished, and will achieve, and that 125 is achievable, and that I am running, which is something that i have always wanted to do without hating :)

    I will say my turning point was when I found out I was pregnant. I have went from weighing 243 (May of 2011, didn't use MFP during the pregnancy) to 183 (as of Saturday).
  • SlimSlow15
    SlimSlow15 Posts: 30 Member
    This is extremely personal, but I started getting fat when I was 7-8 years old. I've been obese since then. I'm not completely sure why I started overeating or finding comfort in food, but that wasn't such a great period in my life. My mom was married to man who beat her, and my brother and I witnessed some terrible things. That may have contributed, but I'm not sure. Not something I've talked about before. I do know that since that time, I've been extremely close to my mom.
  • Frozen300
    Frozen300 Posts: 223 Member
    Until I hit 30 I was always around 180 - 200 lb mark, not really fit, but not really fat.
    Then I got a job that came with free food.
    Then the divorce.
    Then my dad died.
    Then I became estranged from the rest of my family.
    Then I quit smoking.
    Then I got lazy.
    Now I'm 41, this summer I was around 240 - 245 and realized that in 10 years, I'd be lucky if I was only 300 lbs. Time to start bailing this leaky ship.
  • TinGirl314
    TinGirl314 Posts: 430 Member
    I just stopped caring...
    By the time I was 13 I had been on Atkins, the three day pre surgery diet (Which gave me mercury poisoning eating three cans of albacore chunk tuna a DAY.)
    I rebelled against my doctor and my family by eating whatever I wanted.
    I recently did an experiment on what my food choices USED to be like...
    Ugh...5,200 calories, 56 grams of saturated fat...hundreds and hundreds of carbs plus alcohol.

    Not good.
    I see how important it is now but if I hadn't been taught to obsess over it, I might've had an easier time.
    I still feel beat down a lot of the time because with the Diabetes and the PCOS anything that does come off, comes of SLOW.
  • kallisto208
    kallisto208 Posts: 44
    I got tired of the Navy forcing me to work out unsafely and constantly injuring me. I stopped caring, wasn't eating healthy on top of that and the weight started creeping up (was always right on their limits anyways) and there is only so many times you can hear chiefs yelling at you to loose weight to make evaluations before throwing in the towel in frustration. After getting out, I was living with a guy that had the metabolism of a horse and could eat for 3, which meant I ended up cooking and eating portions much more than I needed and I just wasn't paying attention to what I was doing (plus he had a curve fetish I found out way later and encouraged the gain grrr), and had already given up working out after all the pain and anger from the military. Overcoming that mindset took nearly 4 years to break, now I have a whole person to loose.
  • ldrosophila
    ldrosophila Posts: 7,512 Member
    Pure self hatred and loathing
  • lindidit
    lindidit Posts: 16 Member
    Very interesting thread and so great to see I'm not alone!

    There were numerous reasons, many of which have been mentioned by others....the first being pregnancy as the excuse to eat whatever I wanted for nine months. Ugh. I gained 50 pounds each time I was pregnant. Baby #1 was a very slow lose; baby #2 seemed to be all baby and water so it was less hard to peel the weight off. In both cases however,, I kept an extra 5 pounds from each child. I didn't care overly. I was a healthy BMI before getting pregnant for the extra 10 kept me in the range of reasonable and I felt that was my badge of motherhood or something.

    However, some years went by and last year I turned 40. I quit smoking for good. UGH. What a dumb idiot i was to begin again in the first place after I'd had the babies because I had managed to quit both fricken times when I was pregnant. I mean, what kind of idiot does that? Anyhoo....I quit for good and my metabolism plummeted along with it and I started to creep up on the scale. Surprisingly, I managed to actually lose weight in the first 3 months after quitting...tbut hen my job became REAL stressful and before I knew it, I had become an emotional eater. I was eating when I was stressed (which was ALL the time), I wasn't getting enough sleep, and I was never exercising. In 1 and 1/2 months I put on 15 pounds.

    So then I tried to start losing the 15 pounds by walking and eating better. But until MFP, I was never fully aware of just HOW much more I was eating in a day than what I actually needed. I went for a while with the crazy yo-yo sugar business that another poster mentioned and I was starting to get worried because I seemed to have this whole binge eating thing happening to me, It was horrible and I was completely out of control and because I suffer from depression, you can imagine how this made me feel. Oh my word!!! Feel depressed/stressed and binge eat which makes you feel depressed and stressed. Like...are you kidding me? So finally got the depression under control, started using MFP aggressively, and promised myself that I would learn to run a 5KM race before the anniversary of quitting smoking came this past summer.

    So here I am. I'm pretty darned close to my goal weight of 125 (only 2 pounds to go), but truth be told, it's just a silly random number and I'm happy with how I look and feel now, today!

    Oh...and I DID run that 5KM before the anniversary. I now run 5KM 3X/week.!! :)
  • OliveCarsey
    OliveCarsey Posts: 78
    I got preg and took the eating for two seriously, then got really depressed, and was is a bad relationship-very abusive Fast forward 14 years and i am now (and have been for over 9 years) with a very nice loving man, have gained even more weight again preg and then post partum depression- and finally decided to be the girl I was 15 years ago.
  • sbilyeu75
    sbilyeu75 Posts: 567 Member
    I had lost weight before and kept it off until I had an ectopic pregnancy which afterwards I was told I was not going to be able to have children. I would say I was depressed after that. I then somehow got pregnant. Then it took me about a year and a half to get into my groove of working out.
  • MyPaperBleedsInk
    MyPaperBleedsInk Posts: 240 Member
    Lack of proper meals..... when I was younger my mother would always cook meals and whatnot... but at some point we all kind of drifted apart when it came to lunch/dinner. We didn't always enjoy the same foods and would cook our own things.... and eventually that turned into you're on your own almost every time.... and that led to laziness and not wanting to cook so I went for the quick and junky meals.
    I developed a soda addiction which I still can't break to this day, but at least I forced myself onto Pepsi Next which has less calories and sugar.... I don't like diet at all, so this is the best I can do.
    And as I gained weight, I didn't like running around as much because it became more difficult and it brought out the worst in me. Not even kidding, every time we had to run a mile in Phy. Ed. in middle school I would end up crying at the end. Because running allowed me time to think and it also was difficult to do. I realized that I was out of shape, I would constantly tell myself while running/jogging/walking that I wouldn't be able to do it, I would tell myself that I hated myself.... I had been in volleyball and was quite good at it, but didn't continue into high school because I couldn't stand most of the people on my team so that left me with even less physical activity....
    Then my first year of college, only about two years ago, I was at my heaviest and decided I needed to change. Every time I would go anywhere or come back I would tell myself that I hated myself. Every...day....
    And only this past summer when I realized I actually didn't gain as much weight as I normally do over the summer did I decide to try to change this year.
  • Cupcakehippiemommy
    Cupcakehippiemommy Posts: 457 Member
    I had lost weight before and kept it off until I had an ectopic pregnancy which afterwards I was told I was not going to be able to have children. I would say I was depressed after that. I then somehow got pregnant. Then it took me about a year and a half to get into my groove of working out.
    This is really uplifting to me because I had a miscarriage and the number 1 reason of why I am so determined to lose this weight, thank you for sharing doll!
  • Cupcakehippiemommy
    Cupcakehippiemommy Posts: 457 Member
    This is extremely personal, but I started getting fat when I was 7-8 years old. I've been obese since then. I'm not completely sure why I started overeating or finding comfort in food, but that wasn't such a great period in my life. My mom was married to man who beat her, and my brother and I witnessed some terrible things. That may have contributed, but I'm not sure. Not something I've talked about before. I do know that since that time, I've been extremely close to my mom.

    I am very sorry you went through that and think you are a brave soul for sharing that and being on MFP to start gaining back control :) My grampa used to say Every sunrise, is another new beginning and God's proises are like the stars;the darker the night the brighter they shine ^u^ I am not big on religion but that has always stuck with me. Best of luck doll xo
  • Cupcakehippiemommy
    Cupcakehippiemommy Posts: 457 Member
    I never let myself go, exactly. In my adulthood I've always busted my buns to have a nice figure. Last July I got a blood clot that ran from my ankle to my kidney (huge, huh?) caused by something called May-Thurner Syndrome, which I did not know I had, which got severe when I was pregnant with my son. SOOOO, needless to say I almost died. I was bedridden, had to have corrective surgery, and now have a left foot that doesn't always cooperate thanks to all the trauma to that leg. For those who've never heard of May-Thurner, like me before last year, it only affects the left side because it is a left common iliac vein collapse (it collapses under the right artery in the pelvis area). I survived, thank God since I have a baby to raise, but the medications I have to take now (anticoagulants) cause weight gain, not to mention despite an initial loss of weight when it first happened, I gained weight during the incident. Now I'm trying to reclaim my figure......... it ain't easy peeps, but I'm fighting hard. :ohwell:
    Your story is an amazing, I think you are an incredible woman after all you've been through to have the mind of a fighter ^u^ Best of luck doll!
  • Erisad
    Erisad Posts: 1,580
    I was depressed and didn't care whether I was fat or not since I was alway fat since puberty. I figured that men would continue to cheat on me anyway so why bother? I eventually decided that I had to improve myself to get better men, well I met my boyfriend halfway through the weight loss so I guess I was right? O.o
  • MommyToCutie
    MommyToCutie Posts: 31 Member
    Because our society allows mothers to use pregnancy and having children as a valid excuse to get fat and stay that way. Pure and simple. I used my children as an excuse to not work out.

    I agree! After I had my son, everyone around me would say "it's okay, you just had a baby," If I complained about my weight. Even my boyfriend would say that. I wasn't exercising enough, not eating healthy foods, and when I stopped nursing, I started drinking all the time.

    I also feel that I was brought up in a household in which exercise and nutrition weren't stressed as being that important. My sister and I were never overweight when we were kids (she still is really skinny). We never ate dinner together at home, except in front of the TV occasionally. In fact, my parents wouldn't allow me to join any sports in school (I wanted to try out for basketball in middle school and track in high school) because they didn't want to drive me to practices/games! I remember going out to eat at fast food places a lot. And fruits and veggies weren't too dominant in our meals because they were deemed "too expensive". So when I moved out, I followed the same habits. I was never overweight until after I had my son, but I wouldn't say I was healthy either.
  • mphlab
    mphlab Posts: 187 Member
    Prednisone because of Autoimmune hepatitis. Then I had a stroke so my body has not been very cooperative. I have always struggled with weight but I was a 14 or 16 before, never a plus size!
  • sabolfitwife
    sabolfitwife Posts: 423 Member
    I've always been bigger, but last year I was in a relationship and let myself get into that state of mind "I'm comfortable with him, I don't have to worry about what I look like, blah blah blah". By January 1, 2012 I realized that while my boyfriend loves me no matter what size, I didn't love myself and that was unacceptable. I've been on this journey for 9 and a half months and each day is a struggle. My boyfriend and I broke up at the beginning of the year and just recently got back together and I've realized that I need to fuel myself to work even harder and not let myself slip back into that "comfortable" phase. If anything I want to get healthier for him and I both and help him realize that he needs to focus on his health as well.
  • Tracepa98
    Tracepa98 Posts: 219
    I lost my sister to a car accident when I was 17. Then in a whirlwind move 2 weeks later I was relocated to another state, new school, no friends and no car. I was lonely and depressed and ate to feel better.

    Fast forward about a year and I had decided to move away with a new boyfriend. Money was tight and I found myself working two jobs in the hospitality and fast food industry. Due to the current toy promotion going on, Burger King provided me a free meal every day that I worked. So I ate it simply to not starve. 2-3 months of that I'm sure took a toll.

    Then 5 months later, I met someone else and ended up dating/living with him for close to 7 years (together for almost 9). We lived on a tight budget, he was Italian with a light speed metabolism. Eating what he ate and i kept getting bigger.

    He was complacent with me and I became depressed on how our relationship was going. I had the courage to leave him but then moved back home with my aunt. And of course right back into the same habits as before. She ate to make herself feel better and I went right along with it to keep her company.

    So for the first time ever, I'm breaking away, buying my own foods,avoiding the sweets and fattening foods she buys, logging everything and making myself accountable for what I eat.

    I'm not proud of what I look like but I have plenty of time to turn this around and make my life a healthy future.
  • Cupcakehippiemommy
    Cupcakehippiemommy Posts: 457 Member
    I lost my sister to a car accident when I was 17. Then in a whirlwind move 2 weeks later I was relocated to another state, new school, no friends and no car. I was lonely and depressed and ate to feel better.

    Fast forward about a year and I had decided to move away with a new boyfriend. Money was tight and I found myself working two jobs in the hospitality and fast food industry. Due to the current toy promotion going on, Burger King provided me a free meal every day that I worked. So I ate it simply to not starve. 2-3 months of that I'm sure took a toll.

    Then 5 months later, I met someone else and ended up dating/living with him for close to 7 years (together for almost 9). We lived on a tight budget, he was Italian with a light speed metabolism. Eating what he ate and i kept getting bigger.

    He was complacent with me and I became depressed on how our relationship was going. I had the courage to leave him but then moved back home with my aunt. And of course right back into the same habits as before. She ate to make herself feel better and I went right along with it to keep her company.

    So for the first time ever, I'm breaking away, buying my own foods,avoiding the sweets and fattening foods she buys, logging everything and making myself accountable for what I eat.

    I'm not proud of what I look like but I have plenty of time to turn this around and make my life a healthy future.
    I am really sorry for your loss but really happy you are making the change to take back control and start a new life doll ^u^
  • Allylynn
    Allylynn Posts: 8 Member
    Have thought of this often. Every time I restart my weight loss journey. The few pleasant memories of my childhood is sitting down with my mother eating an ENTIRE loaf of bread and chatting. It was one of the few times we weren't fighting. NOT to say my weight is to blame on my mother. Just saying that I started off with HORRIBLE eating habits.

    I'm an emotional eater. Eaten my weigh thru horrible relationships....parents, sister, friends....issues with marriage and health. A few pounds here...a few there...three pregnancies (two of which were on bed rest) it adds up.
  • StartingOver12
    StartingOver12 Posts: 40
    I think mine started with anxiety and depression.I've always been an emotional eater but had it pretty much in check but when I fell into this funk, I just kind of gave up excercising and then diet. I struggled for about 3 years trying to pinpoint exactly what happened in my life to trigger it, then I ended up deciding to go off birth control. Interestingly enough the depression lifted and the migraine headaches I stuggled with for so long also went away.
  • honey_bee_keysha
    honey_bee_keysha Posts: 773 Member
    Well, because I greatly enjoy

    Soda
    Fast Food
    Pizza
    Candy
    Salty Snacks
    Fried Chicken
    etc

    This^
  • latinobarbie1208
    latinobarbie1208 Posts: 6
    I totally took my health and weight for granted. I never thought I'd let myself go but depression set in after becoming disabled and the last five years, pounds just started creeping up as did my cholesterol and blood pressure. Lesson learned...never take anything for granted EVER AGAIN!!!
  • ewestsca
    ewestsca Posts: 63 Member
    haven't been taught how to eat/act in a healthy manner. Now I have to lose some weight and relearn how to live.

    I also did not learn healthy eating habits as a kid. Meeting my ex husband who loved to eat also added to my weight gain. Then a combination of stress, depression and lack of will added the additional 20 pounds.

    I"m trying to relearn everything and to listen to my body.
  • kittykat1994
    kittykat1994 Posts: 149 Member
    University. I'm surrounded by junk food and cheap and easy deals for us. All my friends are awful when it comes to our eating habits too! I've gotten lazy and complacent.
  • onyxgirl17
    onyxgirl17 Posts: 1,722 Member
    I'd say depression, apathy, and readily available tasty fast food. Also, I tried to make up for a lack of energy from working 60-80 hours a week by drinking 3 Monsters (full calorie) a day. Not the healthiest habit. I was drained, exhausted, worried about money because my husband couldn't find a job, and generally just not getting anywhere in life.

    Also trying to please my husband and what he wanted. Now he's used to the fact WE EAT AT HOME most of the time. I will cook for him, pretty much anything he wants.

Categories