Intermittent Farting.

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Replies

  • Themuseinme
    Themuseinme Posts: 224 Member
    Hilarius-Funniest thread ever!!:bigsmile: :bigsmile: :bigsmile: :bigsmile: :bigsmile: :bigsmile: :explode: :laugh:
    This gives getting ripped a whole new meaning:explode: :embarassed: :explode: :noway: :explode: :angry: :explode:
  • BinaryPulsar
    BinaryPulsar Posts: 8,927 Member
    If anyone is unsure about trying this, there is a book now called The New Rules of Farting. But, don't worry Farting won't make you bulky because you have to work really hard at farting for that to happen. I see guys in the squat rack and they are farting a lot and still not seeing the results they want!
  • obeserat
    obeserat Posts: 218 Member
    Not sure if I would follow through on this program
  • bethygirlie
    bethygirlie Posts: 311 Member
    I bet walking farts burn 10x the calories.

    On a side note, if farts burned as many cals as stated, and if this were a real program, you'd have to tie weights to my fiance because he'd probably blow away...while farting.
  • BinaryPulsar
    BinaryPulsar Posts: 8,927 Member
    Two rules: Fart Heavy & Squat Fart!!!
  • trblmakr23
    trblmakr23 Posts: 44
    :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:

    Sooooooo I gonna start this IF program AGAIN...butttttttttttt I could really use some new friends on here to help support me and maybe pull my finger on days I can't fart. Seems my other friends got blown away.
  • SoDamnHungry
    SoDamnHungry Posts: 6,998 Member
    I have to fart first thing in the morning just to get my system started.

    Kind of like revving up an engine?
  • SoDamnHungry
    SoDamnHungry Posts: 6,998 Member
    This is the best thread that has ever happened.
  • MireyGal76
    MireyGal76 Posts: 7,334 Member
    I've started incorporating single leg lifts into my IF program.. works wonders for the thighs, hip flexors and glutes, and also prepares others for the oncoming waft. Full of win. Just be sure to alternate the leg being lifted at the time of release, so that you don't become too heavily ripped on either side.
  • chatterbox3110
    chatterbox3110 Posts: 630 Member
    I much prefer the Random Method, best used at night - it's been really useful with weight loss - for hubby, as he runs a mile every time!
  • paulywoo
    paulywoo Posts: 169 Member
    I thought the heading to this thread was a typo but I'm so glad I checked it out because this is a plan I know I can follow. Thanks for all the hints and tips......still don't know what a queef is but I'm a little scared to Google and find out :blushing:
  • mmapags
    mmapags Posts: 8,934 Member
    I've started incorporating single leg lifts into my IF program.. works wonders for the thighs, hip flexors and glutes, and also prepares others for the oncoming waft. Full of win. Just be sure to alternate the leg being lifted at the time of release, so that you don't become too heavily ripped on either side.

    I've tried the same thing while in bed but I had to stop because my wife would punch me in the back every time I did it. I don't know why she is not more supportive of my fitness??!!
  • cgarand
    cgarand Posts: 541 Member
    Is that like wizzpoppers? My brother is the king of the wizzpopper and he is skinny! LOL
  • RubySinclair
    RubySinclair Posts: 90 Member
    Also, Fart heavy. Try and blow away 20lb dumbbells with each fart. Farting light and displacing 2lb pink dumbbells is not enough.

    OMG great thread for a morning giggle!! I will never be able to look at my pink dumbbells without snickering! :tongue: So glad I haven't gained maturity while losing weight!
  • RubySinclair
    RubySinclair Posts: 90 Member
    Can I do this in the 5x5 as well? And how do I log this in? Cardio or strength training?

    This brings an important point.


    Do not LOG anything.

    :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: pffffffffffffffft :sick: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
  • bulbadoof
    bulbadoof Posts: 1,058 Member
    I don't know why they don't just change the site's name to MyFartnessPal and be done with it. Seems that's all anyone uses this site for anymore.
  • reddi2roll
    reddi2roll Posts: 356 Member
    I thought the heading to this thread was a typo but I'm so glad I checked it out because this is a plan I know I can follow. Thanks for all the hints and tips......still don't know what a queef is but I'm a little scared to Google and find out :blushing:

    From the Urban Dictionary queef a an expulsion of wind from the vulva during coitus; a vaginal fart. Now, I think that deserves super points.
  • mmapags
    mmapags Posts: 8,934 Member
    I thought the heading to this thread was a typo but I'm so glad I checked it out because this is a plan I know I can follow. Thanks for all the hints and tips......still don't know what a queef is but I'm a little scared to Google and find out :blushing:

    From the Urban Dictionary queef a an expulsion of wind from the vulva during coitus; a vaginal fart. Now, I think that deserves super points.

    Oh yeah! Double calorie counts!! And no odor to deal with!!
  • mmapags
    mmapags Posts: 8,934 Member
    Omg! I'm laughing so hard I'm crying!!! LOL!!

    Me, too! :laugh: This is the funniest thread ever! I'm looking for a new program to follow and need to know if the program is good for all age and fitness levels. And what about walking farts?

    Walking farts are the best because they combine walking and farting and you can log them both. My dog used to fart when she wagged her tail and she was really fit.

    Plus the nce thing about walking farting is that you leave behind a nice surpise for anyone coming up behind you!


    My huskie farts while he sleeps

    Wish I had his skill and dedication

    I just want to know why, when my wife and I are watching a movie and the springer spaniel is laying on the floor and cuts one loose, I get tha blame!! Happens every time!! LOL
  • martymays
    martymays Posts: 188 Member
    But how do you log it on MFP?
  • knwitall
    knwitall Posts: 420 Member
    I've decided to try Intermittent Farting. You basically skip breakfast, then you Fart, Intermittently. Most common practice is the 16/8 IF plan where you hold it for 16 seconds then you rip one for 8 seconds. The other alternative method of IF is called Fart, Stop, Fart, but that's more of an alternate day plan.

    BCAA's optional.


    DaFuq I just read? Haha
  • MireyGal76
    MireyGal76 Posts: 7,334 Member
    I thought the heading to this thread was a typo but I'm so glad I checked it out because this is a plan I know I can follow. Thanks for all the hints and tips......still don't know what a queef is but I'm a little scared to Google and find out :blushing:

    From the Urban Dictionary queef a an expulsion of wind from the vulva during coitus; a vaginal fart. Now, I think that deserves super points.

    Oh yeah! Double calorie counts!! And no odor to deal with!!

    what if you can queef on command? Should one incorporate IQ into their routine as well?
  • jg627
    jg627 Posts: 1,221 Member
    I don't believe in IF. I prefer to listen to my body and fart when I need to, especially at wal-mart.
  • HiKaren
    HiKaren Posts: 1,306 Member
    I don't know why they don't just change the site's name to MyFartnessPal and be done with it. Seems that's all anyone uses this site for anymore.

    :laugh: My Fartness Pal. Haaaah.:laugh: We all eat beans, eggs, broccoli, and cabbage together. Then we fart together. Will you be my fart buddy? :embarassed:
  • UncleMac
    UncleMac Posts: 13,833 Member
    I feel like I've been in training for IF all of my life...
  • felice03
    felice03 Posts: 2,644 Member
    I feel like I've been in training for IF all of my life...

    way to bring back an awesome thread! question though...did you search "farting" to find it?
  • MemphisKitten
    MemphisKitten Posts: 878 Member
    LMAO!! NICE! :laugh: :drinker:
  • andreanicole686
    andreanicole686 Posts: 406 Member
    hahaha this is great
  • chivalryder
    chivalryder Posts: 4,391 Member
    Should I fart first thing in the morning, or at night? I don't know which one will prove better results.

    I also don't think I have time for farting every day. I work way too much.
  • GlutesthatSalute
    GlutesthatSalute Posts: 460 Member
    Lmfao!! Love MFP posts.. perfect topic for a friday!! :sick: :sick: :sick: :sick: :sick: :sick: :sick: :sick: :sick: :sick:

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