Monty Python Anyone?

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  • Queen_Adrock
    Queen_Adrock Posts: 130 Member
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    "Now you listen here. He's not the messiah, he's a very naughty boy! Now go away!"
  • rhvandan
    rhvandan Posts: 185
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    Man: I wonder where that fish has gone.

    Woman: You did love it so.
    You looked after it like a son.

    Man: [strangely] And it went wherever I did go.

    Woman: Is it in the cupboard?

    Woman: Wouldn't you like to know.
    It was a lovely little fish.

    Man: [strangely] And it went wherever I did go.

    Woman: Where can the fish be?

    Man in audience: Have you thought of the drawers in the bureau?

    Woman: It is a most elusive fish.

    Man: [strangely] And it went wherever I did go!

    Woman: Oh fishy, fishy, fishy, fish.

    Man: Fish, fish, fish, fishy oh!

    Woman: Oh fishy, fishy, fishy fish.

    Man: That went wherever I did go.
  • laserturkey
    laserturkey Posts: 1,680 Member
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    . . . I cut down trees, I skip and jump, I like to press wild flowers. . .I put on women's clothing, and hang around in bars!
  • Hotanuri
    Hotanuri Posts: 53
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    woman in labor: "what do i do?!"
    doctor: "nothing,dear, you're not qualified"

    and

    "That's the machine that goes 'PING!' "
  • billsica
    billsica Posts: 4,741 Member
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    This is all to silly
  • contingencyplan
    contingencyplan Posts: 3,639 Member
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    The Black Knight always triumphs!
  • rhvandan
    rhvandan Posts: 185
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    Bravely bold Sir Robin rode forth from Camelot.

    He was not afraid to die, O brave Sir Robin.
    He was not at all afraid to be killed in nasty ways,
    Brave, brave, brave, brave Sir Robin!

    He was not in the least bit scared to be mashed into a pulp,
    Or to have his eyes gouged out and his elbows broken,
    To have his kneecaps split and his body burned away
    And his limbs all hacked and mangled, brave Sir Robin!

    His head smashed in and his heart cut out
    And his liver removed and his bowels unplugged
    And his nostrils raped and his bottom burned off
    And his pen--

    Brave Sir Robin ran away,

    Bravely ran away, away.
    When danger reared its ugly head, he bravely turned his tail and fled.
    Yes, brave Sir Robin turned about
    And gallantly, he chickened out. Bravely taking to his feet,
    He beat a very brave retreat,
    Bravest of the brave, Sir Robin.

    He is packing it in and packing it up

    And sneaking away and buggering up
    And chickening out and pissing off home,
    Yes, bravely he is throwing in the sponge.
  • Trechechus
    Trechechus Posts: 2,819 Member
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    "You have to be different!"
    --" Yes, we are all different!"
    ---- "I'm not!"
  • Molly_Maguire
    Molly_Maguire Posts: 1,103 Member
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    "First shalt thou take out the Holy Pin. Then shalt thou count to three, no more, no less. Three shall be the number thou shalt count, and the number of the counting shall be three. Four shalt thou not count, neither count thou two, excepting that thou then proceed to three. Five is right out. Once the number three, being the third number, be reached, then lobbest thou thy Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch towards thy foe, who, being naughty in my sight, shall snuff it."

    Lol, I love this one!
  • KickassAugust
    KickassAugust Posts: 1,430 Member
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    Zoot: "And then the oral sex!"

    Sir Galahad: "Well I guess I could stay a bit longer....!"
  • LindsayHein
    LindsayHein Posts: 73 Member
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    She turned me into a newt...well I got better!

    What do you burn apart from witches?
    More witches!(pause)
    Wood!
    So, why do witches burn?
    Cuz they're made of... wood?
    Gooood.
    So, how do we tell if she is made of wood?
    Build a bridge out of her!

    We are the knights who say Ni!
  • california_peach
    california_peach Posts: 1,858 Member
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    <
    This
  • aallegri
    aallegri Posts: 41
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    It's dead!
    No, it's sleeping!
    It is an EX-PARROT!

    lol

    thanks for the thread...now i've gotta go watch some python on neflix
  • rhvandan
    rhvandan Posts: 185
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    Zoot: "And then the oral sex!"

    Sir Galahad: "Well I guess I could stay a bit longer....!"

    Wicked, Wicked Zoot!
  • rhvandan
    rhvandan Posts: 185
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    Bring out your dead! (clang)

    (this is actually my ringtone.. LOL)
  • LorinaLynn
    LorinaLynn Posts: 13,247 Member
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    NOBODY expects the Spanish Inquisition! Amongst our weaponry are such diverse elements as: fear, surprise, ruthless efficiency, an almost fanatical devotion to the Pope, and nice red uniforms - Oh damn!
  • KickassAugust
    KickassAugust Posts: 1,430 Member
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    Who said women don't like Monty Python?

    These ladies rock like that dude from Foghat!
  • bushidowoman
    bushidowoman Posts: 1,599 Member
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    "All the naughty words sound woody..."
  • Mcmilligen
    Mcmilligen Posts: 332 Member
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    On second thought, let's not go to Camelot. It is a silly place.
  • mycrazy8splus1
    mycrazy8splus1 Posts: 1,558 Member
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    Deidre, get that would you?

    tell them we've already got one.

    I thought we were an autonomous collective.

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