Top 5 things you say/type at work

2456

Replies

  • PBsMommy
    PBsMommy Posts: 1,166 Member
    1. Payroll has been completed. Your reports, checks, and direct dpeosit stubs have been uploaded to the portal for you to view and print.
    2. Did you upload the payroll change notice yet?
    3. COMPLETED! Attached are "left overs"
    4. I still can't find the $0.00 varriance. Yeah, I exported the transaction listing 3 times.
    5. Please log back in and hit the Complete Payroll button. I can not bring your payroll file back over to my computer until you hit this button.
  • michelleindeed
    michelleindeed Posts: 117 Member
    1. Can I help who's next?
    2. Thanks for calling, how can I help you?
    3. No, you need the blue/yellow/green form...
    4. Do you have the receipt?
    5. We're currently not reviewing applications.
  • jmc0806
    jmc0806 Posts: 1,444 Member
    my number 1 is "is it happy hour yet?"
  • Carlyannabelle
    Carlyannabelle Posts: 621 Member
    1. How may I direct your call?
    2. Is it life/health or property/casualty insurance?
    3. Let me get you someone in licensing.
    4.Are you in the purchasing pool? Or tax credit program?
    5.A complaint for insurance or securities?
  • Ke11yJo
    Ke11yJo Posts: 141
    1. Did you actually look for it?
    2. Please confirm ETA when you have a moment
    3. Is it hometime yet?
    4. The tentative consumption forecast is ...
    5. Thanks you make my job easier!
  • MacInCali
    MacInCali Posts: 1,012 Member
    1. Youv'e got to be kidding me.
    2. Seriously, who DOES that?
    3. It's amazing what people will do for money.
    4. I friggin hate people.
    5. Why do I get all the psycho Plaintiffs?
  • jayaprathappsg
    jayaprathappsg Posts: 60 Member
    I am in tech support so:

    1. Can you try now?
    2. Can you restart and give it a shot?
    3. What? It works! You must be doing something wrong.
    4. Yeah I know, we have a fix coming
    5. It is a great software except it does not work.
  • AmberJo1984
    AmberJo1984 Posts: 1,067 Member
    Wedding planner
    1.happy planning
    2. Do not make an enemy of your bridesmaids its not a good move
    3. yes all wedding photographers are like that
    4. Yes you will need to pay your bill
    5. Have you sorted out your problem with the venue yet

    Nurse practitioner
    1.I wont be long could you do an ecg and have an abg syringe set out
    2.When was the last time you even took his blood pressure
    3.Its going to be okay don't look so worried.
    4. If you dont attend your staff meetings how can you expect your boss to understand.
    5. Please give the medication that is prescribed


    #3 under wedding planner -- I have photographed 2 weddings... but, never another one. Too much stress. The last one I had to deal with bridezilla and her mother. Complete horrors. I respect anyone who tries to plan or photograph a wedding.
  • artickb22
    artickb22 Posts: 411 Member
    1. "coffee's made". (I'm the unit shift coffee queen)
    2. "you can't make this *kitten* up"
    3. "I'm gettin 10 & 2 drawn up now" (haldol and ativan)
    4. "no, you cannot go outside for a smoke, you are on a locked unit."
    5. "have a good night"
  • 1. Please schedule the BOM for repackaging.
    2. Please pull from Active location and send to Packaging.
    3. Please see update for Rework Request Approvals
    4. Please advise of any questions/ concerns regarding approvals.
    5. Do we have an approved rework request for moving 40 brand to 80 brand? :flowerforyou:
  • nbhobbes
    nbhobbes Posts: 284
    1. Take off your shirt.
    2. Lay down on the table
    3. This is going to feel kinda cool for a bit
    4. Im sorry but this may hurt
    5. Okay situp now and he will be with you in just a minute

    You work in a dentist office? :P
  • mikeschratz
    mikeschratz Posts: 253 Member
    1) Smart like rock, Quick like tree!
    2) Way to go Capernicus
    3) Seriously?
    4) I'm all over it!
    5) I'm taking 4 hours today!
  • iysys
    iysys Posts: 524
    1. what do you think? (or just look at them until they answer their own question because they always already know the answer and are just looking for my validation)

    2. hey there! i have your order ready to ship. is it okay to charge your card?

    3. there is no such thing as a yarn emergency

    4. lead time when you placed your order was x weeks. since your order was placed y weeks ago it will be ready in z weeks. (x-y=z is a tough one sometimes)

    5. these last two weeks have had a lot of what do you think of this color? what about all these together? will this color work for this design idea?
  • Stella_Leigh
    Stella_Leigh Posts: 189 Member
    1: I see you suffer from xyz, is that why you chose to book a massage therapy session?
    2: Is the pressure okay?
    3: I'm sorry, but this may hurt a bit.
    4: Just take a deep breath and relax
    5: Wake up sir/ma'am
  • HolsDoinIt
    HolsDoinIt Posts: 327 Member
    1. do you have an emergency?
    2. what is your address?
    3. IT, hurry with my ticket plz
    4. the ambulance is on its way
    5. sure I can work tomorrow..
  • JosephVitte
    JosephVitte Posts: 2,039
    1) You do that again and I'm going to report you to the Principle.

    2) Let me know when everyones in here so we can start.

    3) This is our bread and butter.

    4) You're ASB, I expect more from you.

    5) That was a good party!
  • Shelbert79
    Shelbert79 Posts: 510 Member
    1. Go back to the exit sign, the civil division is the last door on the right.
    2. I'm sorry, I can not answer that, it's a legal question and I'm not an attorney.
    3. We need your full rent payment, cash/money order, your landlords name, address and telephone number, and any letters you've sent your landlord.
    4. Courtroom 11A is on the 11th floor, yes, I'm sure.
    5. The water company's phone number is xxx-xxxx, yes, I'm sure we are NOT the water company.
  • CyclngChick
    CyclngChick Posts: 57 Member
    1. The server is down again?
    2. Why is the server down?
    3. When will the server be fixed?
    4. Yes, I'll email it to you once the server is fixed.
    5. Finally! The server is back!
  • frando
    frando Posts: 583 Member
    1) It's beautiful, its built in and it's all British- even the hinges!
    2) It's free of charge to have someone to come out and do all that hard work, no obligation, of course
    3) If you'd like I'll see if someone's free to give you a measure
    4) No, I'm not from the host store, I can't help you with that
    5) The loos are up the stairs, double back on yourself and keep going till the end of the store!
  • NWCyclingBeast
    NWCyclingBeast Posts: 157 Member
    1. Are you ****ING KIDDING ME?????

    2. Did you get trained on (insert equipment item here) like you were supposed to?

    3. Did you talk to (insert Airman's name) about (insert random subject)

    4. Man, I can't wait to retire...

    5. This is some ridiculous bull-****!
  • tessiscruisen
    tessiscruisen Posts: 84 Member
    1. You are just deep in the dumbazz
    2. Why oh why doesn't this balance
    3. Is there a problem with the network?
    4. OMG, I didn't save that yet!
    5. Whatever your smoking I want some, where did you get those numbers from???

    I'm an accountant
  • dadzpeach
    dadzpeach Posts: 174 Member
    Typed.
    1. Property located at .... as described in Future Advance Deed of Trust to ..... dated... in the amount of.... in favor of....
    2. Here are some changes that need to be made
    3. Here are the documents for this loan
    4. Can you update your processing sheet?
    5. What is the maturity date/payment date?

    Said.
    1. Do the officers/Title company actually know what they are doing?
    2. Have you seen how crazy our inbox is?
    3. Are you kidding me?
    4. Another change in terms, why yes let's just add that to my stack
    5. HA, no I'm not busy at all, what do you need? (in response to a loan officer asking if I can type a loan for a customer right that second)

    I'm a loan processor
  • millions0fpeaches
    millions0fpeaches Posts: 195 Member
    Living the dream, you?
    Thanks for the update.
    Yes, I just saved it.
    I only have read access...
    Contact the system admin? I AM the admin!
  • 12skipafew99100
    12skipafew99100 Posts: 1,669 Member
    Good morning, afternoon, evening.
    How may I help you?
    Who is your doctor?
    What is the problem this eveing?
    I'll page the doctor right away.

    And many many more................:wink:
  • S1NN3R
    S1NN3R Posts: 452 Member
    - what was the date of the accident.
    - Do you no the name of the driver?
    - Where did the accident happen?
    -Did they leave you a message because this is the number that shows up for all the offices in this building and the one next door.
    -Let me transfer you to driver's License.
  • murphy612
    murphy612 Posts: 734 Member
    1. That's just placeholder text (as relates to lorem ipsum)
    2. That's just placeholder text (as relates to lorem ipsum)
    3. That's just placeholder text (as relates to lorem ipsum)
    4. That's just placeholder text (as relates to lorem ipsum)
    5. That's just placeholder text (as relates to lorem ipsum)

    :laugh: I feel for you
  • 13inchestogo
    13inchestogo Posts: 296 Member
    1. Would you like your milk in a bag?
    2. Would you like a hand out with that?
    3. Would you like your flowers wrapped?
    4. I'm on my break, call someone else.
    5. So sorry, we don't carry *enter exotic unheard of item*
  • _Elemenopee_
    _Elemenopee_ Posts: 2,665 Member
    1) What is it, Swanny?
    2) I'm sorry, so-and-so is in a meeting, would you like his/her voicemail?
    3) FFS, Swan!
    4) Would you like another espresso?
    5) When I hit the lotto I wont have to deal with this $#!t but you know, you have to be in it to win it! Maybe I should play.


    True story.
  • anrev42
    anrev42 Posts: 331
    1.) Were you able to finish the report I am asking you to do?

    2.) I'm in a meeting, please hold all my calls.

    3.) I'm out of the office, please call my cell

    4.) Heads up everyone.

    5.) I appreciate all your hardwork.
  • ~ One moment please
    ~ Of course I can
    ~ Problem? Then we find a work-around!
    ~ Where's the coverage?
    ~ Work-around didn't work? Time for a work-around to the work-around