Can fat people find love?

Oh sweety!

Dont worry youre very young and you are gorgeous. Focus on loving yourself and taking care of yourself. Love will come believe me! Don't worry about it. Do things you love to do. It will come I remember being your age and thinking I would never find it. It comes you just have to be the best you that you can be. It will come to you when you stop worrying.

Ok, so here's the thing. You're 20. It doesn't seem like it, but you've got *plenty* of time to find somebody so quit panicking.

Secondly, don't define who *you* are by your significant other, or lack thereof. There's a scene in the movie "Cool Runnings" where they're talking about gold medals, and one character says "If you're not enough without it, you'll never be enough with it." The same applies to romantic relationships...if you're not happy with yourself alone, you're never going to be happy with someone, either.

Third, yes, plenty of overweight people are in happy, loving relationships. Personally, that's not for me until I get in shape. Relationships and marriages are stressful, and when you're out of shape, you just don't have the energy to deal with all the trials and difficulties that occur even in healthy relationships. When just living your day to day life wears you out (as it does when you're overweight, though it's not always noticeable), you just won't have the energy or patience to calmly deal with your significant other when he leaves his socks on the floor or something like that. You'll be irritable and have more arguments, and you won't even know why. Just trust me on this, I've been there.

So when a 20 year old woman says she's not the least bit pretty, I immediately investigate. Lady, you're gorgeous!! Your eyes are lovely and your hair is fabulous!! There's a saying along the lines of "if you can't dazzle them with your brilliance, baffle them with your bull****". Make that your to-hell-with-my-low-self-esteem mantra. I'm not skinny in any way, but I ignore that nagging voice that says "You shouldn't wear that dress", pull on some heels (and stuff myself into Spanx ha) and walk into a room like they're all there waiting for me. What does that involve? Shoulders back, eyes up, big ****-eating grin and a hello for the first person you see. Yes, your mom said it too, because it's true, stop laughing. If you get in the habit of doing these things, you'll feel differently because people are going to be more receptive of you. My husband is pushing the 300-mark and I'm not kidding he has to be the most adored person everyone knows. While he is acutely aware of his weight (he is also on here, we're doing this together) it doesn't even occur to him that people might judge him or ignore him because of his size because he doesn't give them a chance to. He has something nice to say to everyone, a borderline inappropriate joke for us, and is the first person to offer a hand when needed. Having said that, yes larger people can find love because while I'm not quite the size he is, I couldn't be crazier about him if he tried to pay me. So ignore that little voice, you're a woman and unfortunately we're born with it, you just have to have selective hearing. Take your weight loss in small steps. Lose 7 lbs, you'll be under 300. There's your start.