Class Reunions: To go or not to go?

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  • Tracepa98
    Tracepa98 Posts: 219
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    I was a loner pretty much through school. I had a few friends but they were outsiders too. We didn't fit into a clique. I hated sports, wasn't artistic, and had no money. I was teased and bullied for the way i was brought up. (Parents were on welfare, i had hand-me-down everything). Despite all this, I was still friendly and polite to everyone.

    I actually went to my 10 year reunion and was one of the few that flew in for it. That trip set me back like $600. It was really great to see a lot of my friends that I did hang out with. What was really funny was that I stood there and looked around at the crowd ( only 19 people showed) and ironically everyone formed back into their old cliques. Nothing had changed. So it made me to start wondering if they still thought badly of me after all these years and why they weren't talking to me much. Had they not grown up and out of that evil and childish behavior? I left there with an accomplished feeling and yet was still saddened.

    I guess it depends on how you feel about the people you attended school with. After experiencing mine, I don't know if I would ever attempt another.
  • lrtoland
    lrtoland Posts: 41
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    Would I go if that were the case for me? No. Why take the risk especially when it was a difficult time for you.

    Did I go to my reunions? No. And not because I was unpopular or picked on. Waste of time and money and not much fun. (I've talked to classmates who DID go to the reunions.)

    You are correct, people are not much different than H.S. days. I've run into some classmates over the years and the mean ones are still mean. (substitue "mean" with any other adjective)

    On the other hand, if you're wildly successful you might want to go just to rub it in their mean faces!

    That is a very valid point. I think the reason I would go is to see some of my friends I haven't seen in years and to just say that I did it, or at least I tried. I can always leave if it sucks. I am not wildly succesful by most people's standards, but I am very content with who I am and where I'm at in life:) Thanks so much for your input!!
  • bleacheblonde
    bleacheblonde Posts: 333
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    Most people ignored me in high school because I was quiet, nerdy, and fat, and I don't live too far away from my hometown so even when I go back, many of them don't recognize me because I look (and act) like a different person. I'd like to go to my 10-year as the new sexy red-headed me and see how many of the idiots that never paid attention to me suddenly want my number (this happened one summer at a wedding I went home for after college). So that I could refuse them point-blank, because it would bring me fun and pleasure :)
  • Becoming_A_Butterfly
    Becoming_A_Butterfly Posts: 2,536 Member
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    Class reunions seem like a waste of time to me. If anyone was important to me and my life, I am already still in contact with them.
  • avargas15
    avargas15 Posts: 26 Member
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    I was aprehensive about attending my 25th class reunion, and was happy I did. Our professors were invited, and the turn out was great, and like one of the other responders, I got to make peace with folks I did not get along with. We are now older, and things do not seem as dramatic and important as they did back then. Most everyone was happy to see everyone else, and bygones were truly bygones. I say you go, let people see how happy your life is, and just enjoy the old stories.

    :flowerforyou:
  • DoxieLove10612
    DoxieLove10612 Posts: 145 Member
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    I was going to go to my 20 year reunion. I joined the facebook group that the organizers were using to get info out.

    Then I remembered why I hated highschool. The same feelings all came crashing back.

    F**K that. If I didn't want to hang out with these people THEN, why would I want to see them NOW?


    Same exact situation only 10 year. I got super excited then I was like I am not spending $400 on a round trip flight to go hang out with people who treated me awful. If you're friends are going, make the best of it. If not, then maybe have an anti-reunion night out with all of your friends at a local bar or something!
  • zobqueen
    zobqueen Posts: 42 Member
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    I say - if you don't feel good or right about going then don't.

    I didn't go to my 10, 20, or 30 yr reunion - for many reasons, didn't know about it or was having my son or didn't feel right about going. But next year is my 40th Class Reunion and I plan on going! It just feels right!

    Good luck with making your decision!
  • lrtoland
    lrtoland Posts: 41
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    I was a loner pretty much through school. I had a few friends but they were outsiders too. We didn't fit into a clique. I hated sports, wasn't artistic, and had no money. I was teased and bullied for the way i was brought up. (Parents were on welfare, i had hand-me-down everything). Despite all this, I was still friendly and polite to everyone.

    I actually went to my 10 year reunion and was one of the few that flew in for it. That trip set me back like $600. It was really great to see a lot of my friends that I did hang out with. What was really funny was that I stood there and looked around at the crowd ( only 19 people showed) and ironically everyone formed back into their old cliques. Nothing had changed. So it made me to start wondering if they still thought badly of me after all these years and why they weren't talking to me much. Had they not grown up and out of that evil and childish behavior? I left there with an accomplished feeling and yet was still saddened.

    I guess it depends on how you feel about the people you attended school with. After experiencing mine, I don't know if I would ever attempt another.

    Thanks so much for sharing:) It must've been so hard to experience that rejection after all those years and after spending all that money!! I am sorry you had that experience, but the fact that you left with an accomplised feeling is awesome:) You did it. You rose above it:)
  • lrtoland
    lrtoland Posts: 41
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    Most people ignored me in high school because I was quiet, nerdy, and fat, and I don't live too far away from my hometown so even when I go back, many of them don't recognize me because I look (and act) like a different person. I'd like to go to my 10-year as the new sexy red-headed me and see how many of the idiots that never paid attention to me suddenly want my number (this happened one summer at a wedding I went home for after college). So that I could refuse them point-blank, because it would bring me fun and pleasure :)


    Lol...they probably will want your number!!! You are so beautiful:) Thanks for responding!
  • bcerz811
    bcerz811 Posts: 39 Member
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    What do you guys think? Would you go if this were the case for you? Do you plan to go to your H.S. Reunion?

    I was so invisible, I wasn't even *invited*. Saw some pictures through Facebook - everyone who showed up is exactly the same.

    I am so sorry. That hurts. I was often invisible in H.S. as well, that is, until some bully felt like being a jerk:S Anyway, it's all good...our experiences shape us into the people we are, for better or worse. Rejection sucks, but we can become stronger from it and choose to reach out to others going through similar experiences;) Thanks for sharing.

    Was also invisible in HS. If we had a 5 year reunion, wasn't invited. When I was a senior in hs, there were kids in my class that I had been to school with since kindergarten and had classes with the whole time that didn't know my name (my graduating class had 140 kids). There were only 5 girls in my HS class that I was friends with. It was all we could do to keep our heads down and avoid the bullies that tormented us most of middle school and the beginning of HS; basically, survive. I've kept in touch with a couple of them and we're all more than happy to be excluded from a class reunion. We now all live different, but very happy and successful lives doing what we dreamed of doing. We still keep in touch through FB and email and phone on our own. We really don't care what the kids who spat on us, called us ugly, pushed us in the halls, spread rumors, threatened us, and made us cry until we were 16, until they'd finally had their fill and simply ignored us when we were 17 and 18 are doing at this point. And before anyone says anything--we were VERY quiet. We truly did nothing to provoke the bullying except be "the shy kids". But I also had an exceptionally mean and horrendous class. My younger brother who graduated 4 years after me said that the faculty still talked about my class and how relieved they were to have us gone. From what I've heard, most of them are burnouts, in jail, or in some other kind of trouble now. The kids that were "good" but still bullies, I still have no interest in seeing. Maybe they've grown up, maybe they're sorry, maybe they're nice now, maybe not. But it doesn't add anything to my life to find out. I'm not angry at them anymore, but I see no point using my valuable time to test the waters. I live 500 miles away from my home town now. Not worth the gas money, not worth the time.

    If you had a good experience, why not go? If you had an "eh" experience, still, why not go? Might be fun to reconnect with people you were even somewhat friends with. But if it was miserable, why waste your time? Enjoy your current life, your current friends, and forget the past hurts. HS was a fraction of your life. If it was unhappy, don't dredge it up, just enjoy the rest of it. :)
  • MrsBully4
    MrsBully4 Posts: 304 Member
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    I would legit rather eat a cockroach
  • Aviva92
    Aviva92 Posts: 2,333 Member
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    My high school classes 20 year reunion was last weekend. I did not go. I never actually got an invite to the facebook group. I suppose I could have joined it though. Had no desire to see those people again.
  • LorinaLynn
    LorinaLynn Posts: 13,248 Member
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    Through Facebook, I'd become close to some former classmates. I can't even call it reconnected, because we weren't that connected way back then because I was shy and thought everyone hated me. Turns out, I was shy and people didn't realize I was shy and thought I hated everyone. Plus, the openness about bullying now made a lot of people who I never realized were bullied "come out" about it, and that connected many of us in a new way. Too bad we didn't know then... we could have banded together!

    Not only that, I've realized that the "mean kids" were just as confused as everyone else. They weren't mean because they were bad people. They were mean because they were scared and insecure and acted out poorly. Because we were all dumb kids.

    I went to my 20th and enjoyed it.
  • jmc0806
    jmc0806 Posts: 1,444 Member
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    My 10 year reunion is still a year away, and they set up a facebook page and everyone is already fighting over details (some people even wanted to bring kids to it...wtf?!) I think I'll be passing on that. I still see some of my friends from high school and the rest I can talk to on facebook and set up our own reunions. My graduating class was also almost 900 kids....
  • corn63
    corn63 Posts: 1,580 Member
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    My 10 year reunion was lame. We had a class of 370 and 40 showed up. Lame lame lame. I only went because I'm dating a guy from my class and he wanted to go. If I wanted to talk to the people from my class, I'd friend them on Facebook.
  • CentralCaliCycling
    CentralCaliCycling Posts: 453 Member
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    I had a great time at what would have been a 30th reunion (had I not GED'd out)... It was a great time in a country club setting.
  • Ronngie
    Ronngie Posts: 295 Member
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    I never go to mine. It's so far from where I am now, and who I am now, I honestly don't really desire to go.
    I'm too busy making memories with the people in my life that matter to bother with going. I see these people on facebook- that's good enough for me ;)
  • _Wits_
    _Wits_ Posts: 1,286 Member
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    Meh...if you have some friends to go with then go. Eff what the others think or say there.

    I went to my 10 year after much begging by my bestfriend...and we had a friggan blast. We met up with a group of people we all hung out with back then and ended up leaving and going to a local bar...

    Granted..my husband had to come pick up his drunk wife at 2am at a city gas station but still...it was fun!
  • ShayShay22816
    ShayShay22816 Posts: 19
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    I didn't go to my 5 yr... didn;'t really care now in December my 10 year one is scheduled. I may go to this. Make a apperance. pretty much everyone that i do care to see or read about is on my facebook. Others i really don't care. If anything like somebody else said, go spend a night hanging with ur friends maybe call some up if you dont talk to them as often and see if they would like to hang out instead. if you really dont want to go, I wouldn't. The hs cliques are still there, that doesn't change i dont think.
  • Cyngen
    Cyngen Posts: 557 Member
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    Didn't have trouble in high school. I was in sports and good in academics. Never had the desire or inclination to 'see what they are doing now." Never will attend one.

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