he keeps telling me im fat i've lost 44lbs

Marc713 · October 2012

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would NEVER be with a man who told me I was fat. EVER !

Yet so many women EXPECT their men to be honest...and then ask them questions like, "does this outfit make me look fat?"

And when we say, "no, the fat makes you look fat, not the outfit." the woman gets all mad. Don't test us with loaded questions that can never be answered correctly. Now, alternatively, if the person putting on the weight can't take their partner pointing out the fact that they let them self go, perhaps the problem is with that person that became lazy, eating bad, or whatever added the weight. We can love you regardless of your weight, but that has NOTHING to do with being honest and letting you know you are over weight. For me, it's just like smoking or other bad habits, I would point it out to my partner because I care about them and want them to be in my life as long as possible. I'd also be supportive and offer to workout with them, help them use a tool like MFP, get them to the gym with me, etc. So I would say much of it is contextual, but in the end, if you are fat, suck it up and admit it. If you embrace it, it can't be used to hurt you, and then you can use it to strengthen your resolve to make the changes you need to make.

In this instance, this guy is out of line and just being a tool. He's in the wrong for making you feel bad about your progress, and you are probably better off finding someone that will support you in your desire to live a healthier lifestyle. Keep up the great work and don't let his negativity put a damper on sticking to your weight loss goals!

Nerdybreisawesome · October 2012

Something I can not get on board with: he is jealous or insecure, so talk to him. WTF?! Are you kidding me? He is mentally abusing her. She needs to kick him out and move on. Who cares if he is jealous or insecure. That never makes it okay to pick on someone else. NEVER! The OP needs to feel proud and beautiful. She needs a man not a boy. That is all there is to it. **** his insecurities. My man has insecurities, we all do. But my man has never said a mean word to me in the 17 years we have been together.

CanuckTracy · October 2012

Sounds to me like you need to lose about 225 pounds and 69 inches.

^^^ this! The only extra useless weight you have is him....you have come so far and are inspiring ...if he can't see that, he doesn't deserve you..

Chopper88 · October 2012

Dump his *kitten*. Lifes too short to be unhappy or live unhealthy. Best wishes with continues loss.

diligentjosh · October 2012

Not sure how you do it in Bri'ain, but we here in America call that guy a wanker!.....oh, maybe it is like that there. But we have a divorce rate of about 47% right now, and that is a big reason why. Men can be abusive jerks sometimes. I would leave him. If you are losing the weight, he should be thankful because you weigh less when you ride him. I wouldn't want some big lady on me, and then my member slip out, and over, and then -ouch. What guy wouldn't see that benefit? So I have to determine that he is just an *kitten*. Move on, sweet thang.

Wwonderful · October 2012

F HIM AND KEEP DOING YOUR THING!!!

jmeyer925 · October 2012

He probably thinks he's being funny :noway:

treimnitz · October 2012

Sounds to me like you need to lose about 225 pounds and 69 inches.

Agreed! He's jealous of your accomplishment and instead of working on his own weight issue, he is deciding to tear you down with him! If he's not going to support you, why stay with him?!

Valm0n · October 2012

tracyhall63 · October 2012

Dump.Him.

meshashesha2012 · October 2012

tell him to STFU and remind him about his receeding hairline and/or small penis

espree70 · October 2012

Sabotage...that's not a loving supporting person kinda sounds abusive. People who love you lift you up not knock you down. Sometimes they say "well I'm only joking" remind them a joke is only funny if it's funny to both people. Keep up the great work and make what you think about yourself more important than what anyone else thinks....have a great healthy weekend

wannabeskinny27 · October 2012

congrats for loosing the weight you must feel amazing
my advice don't listen to what your boyfriend says about weight
he should definitely look in the mirror
hugs to you x

hughtwalker · October 2012

do you have a mirror big enough?

Owlie45 · October 2012

Good for you.

Hes threaten by it. He probably fears that if you get into shape that you will look else where or that someone will steal you away from him. Sit down and have a talk with him, try and despell his fears.

Did he always call you fat? If he has then leave is sorry *kitten*, if this started with the weight loss then yes its out of fear.

tashaa1992 · October 2012

If someone is overweight, etc, someone may make a comment because of their concern for the persons health but I don't believe that is what he is doing. He should love you for you, if he doesn't love you now, he won't love you when you've lost the weight you're looking to lose, I'm sorry but that's just how it is. I suggest breaking it off, don't take the abuse, you deserve so much more than this.
I have actually been in this situation, I have never been overweight but I have anorexia, depression and body dismorphia. Whenever I tried to recover and gained a little weight he made me feel so small, he told me I was ugly and he also said no other guy would want to be with me, I may love him but I only stayed with him because I believed everything he was telling me. I still believe it now, because that's what abuse can do to you, I strongly advise you to rethink this relationship. There is never a good enough excuse to belittle someone and make them feel worthless xxx

CherryOnionKiss · October 2012

wow, throw him out. He doesn't deserve you!

Suzyqall72 · October 2012

I was going to ask if he had washboard abs, but at that H/W, not bloody likely. Tell he you've been working on it, and you would appreciate a little support. He might even be jealous that you've lost weight. I wish you the best. Don't let anyone treat you badly.