Thanksgiving Help....dreading the Food Pushers!

I truly am sorry. I don't know how this thread got so out of control. This is suppose to be the Motivation and Support thread....not the Bash and Bruise one.

I am actually jealous of you that you have a family that supports you enough to not mind at all if you eat a Lean Cuisine or the entire turkey! That is the whole point of my original post. I can find plenty of healthy options to eat...I am bringing a lot of healthy options...I will eat some turkey. I just don't want to offend my mom. I know she will want me to try EVERYTHING. And it isn't as easy as a simple "no." Which is VERY evident by the mixed comments on this post. The posters can't even agree if I should just sit there and eat what she gives me or walk away and stand up for myself.

I do thank everyone for their input. I REALLY am appreciative of the people who really took time to answer my original post. I am going to read through all of them and hopefully I will come up with something that will work for me.

But please everyone...no more negative posts. It doesn't help anybody.

I'm not surprised you're getting such a range of responses. Every family is different and only you know the dynamic and what might cause long lasting repercussions.

My parents are also food pushers and live a few thousand miles away from me. That means, when I visit them, I am subjected to their terrible diets and food pushing for at least a week. I managed to lose weight this summer while staying with them for 10 days by being very firm and clear about what I would and would not eat for my stay, with the exception of two meals on my free days for the two weekends I was there.

I also think one meal isn't going to blow it, especially if you keep up the exercise, but the big problem with something like Thanksgiving is the leftovers - all those calorie-dense foods that nobody wants to go to waste! Plus all the extra unnecessary calories added to the foods served up at my parents' during the holidays. In my opinion, sweet potatoes don't need sugar added to them. I taste everything, but don't fill up my plate with regular-sized portions of each food. I even have pie, but just a sliver, not a whole slice. Desserts don't all need to be topped with whipped cream. All the bready products don't need to be smothered in butter. I try to limit my calories a bit by avoiding the extras that I can!

I will face the same thing at Christmas this year (Thanksgiving will be in Vegas, so no turkey and stuffing for me). I will allow one freebie and the rest of the time I'm there, I will be measuring, counting and logging in MFP. To me, it's worth a little indulgence a couple times a year if control is possible in the days around those feasts!

Wow!! This is a lifestyle change, not a diet, and one day of indulgence and enjoyment will not de rail the whole process. I would be OFFENDED if I had prepared a Thanksgiving feast and someone brought a Lean Cuisine. Don't do that!! Talk to your hostess and plan a couple of healthy choices together. Get a good work out in, take a little of your favorites, fill up on veggies, and enjoy the company. Talk a lot--you won't have time to put food in your mouth!! Sheesh, people. This is a holiday, and a time to be thankful. Enjoy it!!

Well lucky for me, my family are NOT food pushers and they support my lifestyle and the choices I make. My husband's aunt is fully aware that I am bringing it and they are not offended at all. Reason for the Lean Cuisine--- so I can log!!! I cannot log their recipes! How do I know how many calories are in their butter smothered food ?! Everyone has their own choice to make. Glad everyone was ripping my decision apart with their criticisms and judgements while I carried on about my day happily :huh:

Actually, just as an FYI, you can log it. I do it all the time with recipes. If you really wanted to do that, just ask them for their recipes and build them out on here. You can indicate how many portions each recipe makes and then when you are logging your meals it works like any other food.

Actually, I agree with your mom, OP. It's a holiday. Eat the fattening foods and enjoy, then go back to "normal" eating on Friday.

why?? My sister works the ER thanksgiving. She said she sees more heart attacks that day then any other

While eating unhealthy food can lead to heart disease over time due to fat gain or clogging arteries, but it does not cause an immediate heart attack unless perhaps brought on from choking (which could also happen with healthy food).

Heart attacks go up during the holidays due to stress, no doubt sometimes caused by family arguing over something as silly as food.

Eat what your given and be grateful for it, If you start making a fuss at every festive feast, you might stop being invited. MFP is supposed to be a "LIFE style" change and there's going to be plenty more thanksgivings in your life.

Well, I'm the holiday cook in my family and I can relate to your Mom somewhat. I have traditional dishes I fix every year that I fix because that's what I had at holidays from early childhood. I've dropped the marshmallow fruit salad, the banana cherry jello, and the mincemeat pie because I'm the only one who eats them and I've sacrificed these comfort foods to be practical. I get a lot of joy from fixing food, and it's easy to pack emotional feeling into them. I suspect your Mom really wants these foods because she associates them with the holidays of years past.

You'll find that over the years your Mom will get used to you eating differently. Introduce some of your new food choices into her spread, and they may become new favorites.. Fruit salad, yum. Let your Mom go overboard, but quietly eat what you need for your own choices. Only you know what goodies you can taste a bite of and not lose your resolve. Being too full to eat something is a good excuse.

I don't know how old you are, but some time host the meal at your own house and start your own traditions.

I have another solution.

Let me come along, too, but don't tell your family I'm coming. There'll be less food for each person so you eat less. :bigsmile:

Wow!! This is a lifestyle change, not a diet, and one day of indulgence and enjoyment will not de rail the whole process. I would be OFFENDED if I had prepared a Thanksgiving feast and someone brought a Lean Cuisine. Don't do that!! Talk to your hostess and plan a couple of healthy choices together. Get a good work out in, take a little of your favorites, fill up on veggies, and enjoy the company. Talk a lot--you won't have time to put food in your mouth!! Sheesh, people. This is a holiday, and a time to be thankful. Enjoy it!!

Well lucky for me, my family are NOT food pushers and they support my lifestyle and the choices I make. My husband's aunt is fully aware that I am bringing it and they are not offended at all. Reason for the Lean Cuisine--- so I can log!!! I cannot log their recipes! How do I know how many calories are in their butter smothered food ?! Everyone has their own choice to make. Glad everyone was ripping my decision apart with their criticisms and judgements while I carried on about my day happily :huh:

Actually, just as an FYI, you can log it. I do it all the time with recipes. If you really wanted to do that, just ask them for their recipes and build them out on here. You can indicate how many portions each recipe makes and then when you are logging your meals it works like any other food.

my family don't write down their recipes. It's "a handful of this, or a pinch of that" etc. And I really don't want to estimate. I just wish everyone would respect MY decision and leave it alone already. Thanks everyone and have a nice day tomorrow.

Options: #1 : Say you've gone Vegan (this will limit your food options significantly)
Option #2: Run a couple miles tomorrow morning and flush your body with water pre and post meal
Option #3: Take a spoon full of each item and consider that your meal (youve tasted it all and no one is offended)

From personal expierence and coming from a warm food family and culture the Worst thing you can do is call someones food fattening and tell them to cook something else, This IS offensive (even for those vegans and vegetarians who are limited) so in order to keep the peace and not be the talk of the hairshop or local grocer you can politely......

Option #4 : Make a nice green dairy free dish of your own
Option #5: Eat before hand and nibble monderately in between coffee and tea
Option #6: Make visits to different Thanksgiving dinners and stay for a limited time to spread holiday cheer and leave with in an hour of each

The thing with changing is that you also have to be considerate to an extent, you cant chuck family and common manners because you have decided to improve a piece of yourself. You will always as a living being have areas of improvement and if you chuck people ( become selfish to an extent and hurt feelings) by the time your done improving you'll be quite lonely. So I'd say when contemplating food approach take a vegetarian approach (the polite ones not the radicals lol)

1. Pack (bring a dish)
2. Hydrate (fluids)
3. Be polite

Sidenote: I just wanted to say also Veggies and Fruit have calories too so think moderation. Dont over do it on anything (including fruit and veggies) and it helps to eat off the little 6inch diameter plates.

Progress is the key not perfection* So breathe and take it one moment, one decision and one meal at a time....

Thanksgiving should not be a day of PANIC its a day of sharing and if you don't want to focus on eating you can also volunteer to feed someone else (Food Banks, Soup Kitchens, some Churches, Shelters .....They can ALWAYS use the extra food and can use Volunteers who dont mind serving