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    Eating right is impossible! I give up.

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    • Posts: 3,958 Member
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      Don't run with a fork!!!!!

      forknose1_zps5b3d7fbf.jpeg

      GAH
    • Posts: 4,733 Member
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      **CRINGE***

      agree. i would have preferred not to have seen that. the poor little kid.
    • Posts: 151 Member
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      The ship set ground on the shore
      Of this uncharted desert isle
      With Gilligan,

      The skipper too...

      Really, I just have one question--will Billsica marry me? omg, I haven't laughed so hard since the "I don't know how to poop" thread! People--it's dry wit--apparently too dry for some. Its the chit chat fun and games board!!
    • Posts: 34,415 Member
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      Don't run with a fork!!!!!


      No no no!!! You're drunkposting all wrong. Less kids with forks stuck through their noses and more, well, fun.

      C'mon...you're better than this...so do better. Nay, *be* better.

      Carry on.
    • Posts: 744 Member
      :( my bad everyone.. I typed running with fork in google, and this was the first image that came up. I'm just trying to bring the dangers of running with forks (towards cake) to light..

      Please just run to cake (with no fork) and slam your face into it.

      Like this:

      face-in-birthday-cake_zpsef82d669.jpeg
    • Posts: 34,415 Member
      :( my bad everyone.. I typed running with fork in google, and this was the first image that came up. I'm just trying to bring the dangers of running with forks (towards cake) to light..

      Please just run to cake (with no fork) and slam your face into it.

      Like this:

      face-in-birthday-cake_zpsef82d669.jpeg

      Much better.
    • Posts: 1,781 Member
      wth is this post

      NZn0s.gif
      I AM DYING LAUGHING!! This post. This gif. Made my night!!
      For many of you that responded previously I should note that I am not literally dying. Please do not call the authorities and report my untimely demise. I am simply participating in the chit chat fun and games portion of the evening.
    • Posts: 4,741 Member
      I'm a personal chef...I'd like to see my kids try to fire me! ;):tongue:

      Thank you everyone for your love and support. I said it was not MY chef, but my parents. To everyone who says that my problems are not important, I just don't know what to say. We are all here on the same journey and we are all in the same boat together. Bless you all!

      [IMG}http://sphotos-a.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ash3/c80.0.403.403/p403x403/558824_312325852214504_1875969694_n.png[IMG][/img]
    • Posts: 34,415 Member
      show previous quotes

      Thank you everyone for your love and support. I said it was not MY chef, but my parents. To everyone who says that my problems are not important, I just don't know what to say. We are all here on the same journey and we are all in the same boat together. Bless you all!

      558824_312325852214504_1875969694_n_zpsf76a3b61.png

      Fixing things. It's what I do.
    • Posts: 4,733 Member

      We are all here on the same journey and we are all in the same boat together.

      grumpy-cat-hates-journey_o_954720.jpg
    • Posts: 153
      I think the first two pages of responses didn't notice what category this was posted in :tongue:


      I guess that was chit chat or games because it wasn't really fun.
    • Posts: 1,907 Member
      Call HR and have him replaced with a health-conscious chef. There are plenty of people out there who would happily prepare meals for you and stay within your macros. You may have to pay him or her a bit more, but isn't that kind of expertise worth it?
    • Posts: 5
      I have a solution: Just send him on over to me.
      See, no more problem...
    • Posts: 34,415 Member
      show previous quotes

      I guess that was chit chat or games because it wasn't really fun.

      Speak for yourself because I had fun. Oh, sure, it wasn't a high level of fun, but it was still a little fun. Certainly more fun than dozens of pages of people making decisions about the above poster.
    • Posts: 386 Member
      Bwahahahaaa this entire thread just made my night. Seriously people??? Lmao


      Bill...you're awesome and I hope you don't choke on any small toothpicks!
    • Posts: 8,138 Member
      How can there possibly be so many stupid people all gathered together on the same website?
    • Posts: 203 Member
      Find a recipe-hand it to him. Tell him NO substitutions:noway: and speak to your parents about his behavior if it continues.
    • Posts: 4,733 Member
      How can there possibly be so many stupid people all gathered together on the same website?

      27705641.jpg
    • Posts: 8,138 Member
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      27705641.jpg

      Aww. Not you. I was talking about the OTHER ones.
    • Posts: 4,733 Member
      Aww. Not you. I was talking about the OTHER ones.

      well, in that case...

      post-45702-0-99950800-1354134171.gif
    • Posts: 4,733 Member
      How do you handle dealing with your personal chef? I am really at a loss. I'm at my parents during the holiday and its just a nightmare. I mean this guy is classically trained in French or something. Well I ask for a sandwich and I get this thing with sauces and mint sprigs on it. My son gets a peanut butter and jelly sandwich in the shape of a pirate ship with sails and radish carved cannons and grape.. grape shot. Great, I got a tooth pick chocking hazard on my hand wile I'm trying to scrape this orange gel off my ham if its even ham.
      I try to go make my own stuff, but porky mcchef is all shushing me out of the kitchen and is all up in my face how its not my job to make food, I mean its just so frustrating. How do you handle the help? There is only one guy at night that doesn't seem to care much and just will give me some of the kids cheerios at least with out some side of toast and grapefruit menagerie.

      So I just give up and going to eat this old cheese looking thing, ugh so frustrating.

      so, did you have to fire your uppity chef? if so, i hope you didn't give him a good reference for his next employer.

      also, it'd be a good idea to get your chef and butler and gardener and all of your other servants to sign a non-disclosure agreement (NDA) as a condition of employment. if they refuse, fire them. in this economy, you're really doing them a favor by offering them a job, so it's reasonable to require an NDA from all of your estate employees. if you don't and they end up working for somebody else who happens to be a member of your country club, you may end up the butt of the joke quite by accident. been there, done that. it wasn't fun and i learned my lesson the hard way. now, it's sign the NDA or they're back on the street the same day.
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