I see myself as thinner than I really am!

losingitandfindingme
losingitandfindingme Posts: 14
in Health and Weight Loss
Does anyone else struggle with this?

I am 5'4" and 280lbs so I know I am obese. I look in the mirror and in my mind I think I'm 4 or 5 dress sizes smaller than I actually am! Then I see photos of myself and am shocked at how big I look. Especially next to my skinnier friends! Or if I see myself in a shop window... objects in the mirror are larger than they appear (in my mind.)

Why is this? Am I in denial? Is this some sort of mental block?
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Replies

  • NSP85
    NSP85 Posts: 27
    I actually said the same thing to my friend at lunch the other day. When i look in the mirrow, I think i look amazing and then I see pictures and I'm like 'wow.' I think it's denial on my part. Weight loss isn't always about just eating healthy and working out, it's a mental challenge at times. I know I need to face reality about my weight, it may not be pretty but it's the truth. I'm just taking it all day by day.
  • BethingtonBear
    BethingtonBear Posts: 1
    I know exactly what you mean! I have that same issue.
  • BrieLP
    BrieLP Posts: 300 Member
    I struggle with this every dang day.
  • Biggoal50
    Biggoal50 Posts: 33 Member
    I struggle with this too! I look in the mirror and think, "Lookin' gooooood". but the scale says "obese". The best way to see yourself is to look at pictures. About 8 years ago, my sister took a picture of me and put it on a slideshow at my niece's birthday party. I almost didn't recognize myself! Since then, I have kept off about 40 pounds. Now I'm trying to lose 50 more. Good luck to you!
  • leomom72
    leomom72 Posts: 1,797 Member
    i think we want to feel skinny now, so its why we do it..i dont do it too much anymore, but when i was nearing 200 lbs, i did that too often
  • ashleen7
    ashleen7 Posts: 258 Member
    I had this problem before I lost weight, faborexia I called it! Thought I looked fab even at a uk size 18 but now I'm the opposite, I'm a uk size 12 now and feel bigger than I did 46lbs ago! Mind tricks or what?!
  • Cat_124
    Cat_124 Posts: 2
    Definitely agree! The other thing I've found is because I'm taller than most of my friends I try to use that to justify why I stand out in a group photo.
  • witrixie2011
    witrixie2011 Posts: 224
    I know exactly what you mean! I have that same issue.
  • SherryL53
    SherryL53 Posts: 1
    I'm the same way! I know I'm heavy, but I don't see it in the mirror. :noway: My knees are killing me and I can't really exercise, so I am trying to watch what I eat. It's hard...
  • UsedToBeHusky
    UsedToBeHusky Posts: 15,228 Member
    I was like that for years! I finally got to a point where I knew I couldn't continue to disillusion myself. Finally, I'm beginning to reconcile my real image with my self-image! :smile:
  • Lyra89
    Lyra89 Posts: 674 Member
    I think I do this, also! I'm by no means overweight, however when I see pics of all my MFP friends with their taut, toned, bare tummies and THEY are trying to lose weight, I look at myself properly in a full length mirror and realize I have a LONG way to go before I look even half as fit/slim as them.

    But the point is I'M HEALTHY, so I really have nothing to worry about. GET HEALTHY & don't worry about being 'thin'.
  • sds76
    sds76 Posts: 215 Member
    When I was 264 I didn't see myself as big as I was. My advice, quit looking in the mirror and take a real picture, like you in a bra and underwear. That scared the **** out of me and brought me to this site. Now I still look in the mirror but I take pictures to get a real view of everything.

    It's great to have a good self-image and I'm not trying to take that away, but if you are just looking for that extra push try the picure idea.

    I agree, the hardest part of all of this is the mental part. I can eat less, I can exercise more and I have been successful, the mental side is a hard one to conquer. But you'll do it!
  • Desdemina
    Desdemina Posts: 150 Member
    Nice to hear I'm not the only one! I don't see myself as thin, but I don't see myself as obese as I am. Maybe my first goal should be to lose enough that I actually look like I do in my head!
  • calroseangelo
    calroseangelo Posts: 144
    I know exactly what you're saying. I was in my sister in law's wedding in 2010...I was 13 weeks pregnant, but was probably pushing 200lbs. I thought I looked pretty good. I mean I was pregnant after all so I could look a little plump. Looking at those pictures now...ugh. Not good. I didn't look pregnant...I looked FAT!! :noway: I wish I could go back and be in the wedding with the body I have now! Oh well. I think it is a denial thing...I never thought I would ever be 200lbs, but there I was...just know you are not alone and you have to start somewhere!! Keep at it and you can get the you in your head to be real!! :happy:
  • MelBristol
    MelBristol Posts: 63
    ... and me! But then I love myself. I know I have to loose weight to be healthy but sometimes I look in the mirror, wiggle my tummy and think it will be sad to see it go. Then other times I think I have to be a few sizes smaller so dresses fit nicely :) I certainly look better naked than with clothes on hahaha
  • jennylee133
    jennylee133 Posts: 26 Member
    Yes...every day and it is good to know I am not alone! I don't know if it is some sort of denial but I am also always surprised by how different I look to myself in the mirror compared to when I see a picture of myself. I have resorted to keeping a picture with me to serve as a reminder so that when I start fooling myself into thinking I can eat what I want because I'm not "that heavy" I have a quick reality check on hand.
  • rides4sanity
    rides4sanity Posts: 1,269 Member
    We all have a picture in our mind of what we look like. That is just the way it is. Strive to become what you already believe yourself to be (or better) and things will get better. Good Luck!
  • SmilesIowa
    SmilesIowa Posts: 43
    OMG I do this all the time! I think I look awesome, and then I see a picture of myself and I wonder how that's me. I always look better in the mirror then in a photo. It's probably my mind helping me because otherwise I might never leave the house! :)
  • Bobby__Clerici
    Bobby__Clerici Posts: 741 Member
    The man in the mirror lies...:bigsmile:
    I was the same way until the following picture was taken....OUCH!
    33323822_1748.jpg
  • ToshaFeb268
    ToshaFeb268 Posts: 71
    You know what...I feel the same. I don't feel as heavy as I appear in photos. I was in a photo with my husband and some friends on a trip and I looked like I was carrying triplets. Now I recently took a photo NYE and looked slimmer. I know since then I have taken off 32 pounds altogether. It was like that when I was very thin too. I felt like I was heavier. Go figure:frown:
  • Sla6adm
    Sla6adm Posts: 31
    Some mirrors are stretched (especially clothes shops), and that may be why you think you look smaller at home. Try a different mirror. x
  • omma_to_3
    omma_to_3 Posts: 3,265 Member
    Pictures suck. When you're looking in a mirror, you naturally pose yourself in the most flattering way. In pictures, you don't have that option. I once had a friend take some pictures where I had a mirror behind her so I could see myself and pose better. Great pictures!

    Pictures still bother me - always have. My husband always tells me (and I think he's being honest) that I don't look like that in real life. Real life is different, you're moving constantly. Pictures are frozen in time. Think of the celebrity pictures that make them look horrible even though they're not.

    We got some family pictures taken at the end of September. I really liked them. My mom said, those are nice, but you look much thinner in person. Yay mom! She doesn't had out fake compliments LOL.
  • happycauseIride
    happycauseIride Posts: 536 Member
    I've done it too. It was probably denial on my part. I wouldn't admit in my head that I was as big as I was and then I would catch a reflection in a store window or see a picture on FB and think "Is that really me?" Or worse yet, I would see a woman that is really big and think, "Am I as big as her?"

    Self sabotage is the way easier then thinking positive.
  • katiedid1226
    katiedid1226 Posts: 231 Member
    Yes, I do this, too! Is it wishful thinking? Or could it be being happy with what you have? I had no idea how bad I looked - I always thought pictures just add the pounds.

    It's almost embarrassing - my prancing around feeling all good about myself when everyone else saw someone who needs to lose some poundage.
  • Spenezich
    Spenezich Posts: 5 Member
    I do this on both ends of the scale (chronic yo-yo dieter here). When I'm heavier, I think of myself as thinner and am shocked when I get an unexpected glimpse in store window, or see a photo of me. When I'm thinner, I still think of myself as being heavier and then I'll see myself in a photo and I'll be pleasantly surprised at how thin I look. I don't know what it takes for my brain to catch up!
  • BigDnSW
    BigDnSW Posts: 641 Member
    Nope, I see my self as I am and accept myself and am moving forward daily to a shrinking me. There is nothing wrong with loving yourself as you are, where you are, and growing (or shrinking) to a better you. Acceptance is the first step to overcoming. Not picking at you one bit...
  • Linda_Darlene
    Linda_Darlene Posts: 453 Member
    When I was heavy, I knew I was heavy. Even after I lost a lot of weight, I still felt the same. Recently I saw an old photo of myself. Holy Cr##! I was massive. I was bigger than I thought. Even though I know I am significantly smaller, I still feel like the same old fat woman.
  • Colombianchick29
    Colombianchick29 Posts: 298 Member
    I feel the same way. I think I look so cute in the mornings before I go to work sometimes...then I get to work and see myself and im like oh geeeeeezzzz are these trick mirrors???. Pictures are the worst...especially when you are next to slender people. Just makes you look EVEN bigger!!! I have even had those moments recently where I just cant believe thats me in the the picture...like whoooooaaaa who is this?? cus that is sure not how I feel!
  • cloe31
    cloe31 Posts: 75 Member
    I have the opposite. I lost 35lbs and I still see myself as what I was before.
  • brittaney10811
    brittaney10811 Posts: 588 Member
    every... single .... day..... :(

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