The Side of Weight Loss No One Talks About

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Replies

  • maryrx59
    maryrx59 Posts: 55 Member
    Ooh yeah, that blend of body dysmorphia, disappointed expectations and actual tissue damage from having stretched everything out, and THEN figuring out what's real and isn't, while you're figuring out what to do about it.

    So yeah, being between a wrap dress and a bikini.

    Love your sense of humour!
  • sophrosyne_
    sophrosyne_ Posts: 18 Member
    the way people suddenly like you more because you look different. according to the way society treats you, your value goes up as your weight goes down. that's honestly the hardest part to deal with... the realization that that's all people really care about.
  • maryrx59
    maryrx59 Posts: 55 Member
    My rings are so loose now....need to size them down!
  • cjvvus
    cjvvus Posts: 89 Member
    My biggest problem is my mental picture of myself has not caught up with my physical appearence. I have been getting lots of compliments and encouragement at work. Coworkers making comment about how good I look. The scale tells me I have lost weight, I have had to buy new clothes but I am still wrapping my brain around who I see in the mirror.
  • LozPenguin
    LozPenguin Posts: 139 Member
    I try to buy really cheap clothes while losing weight. Lots of Target, TJ Maxx, just got some jeans at Old Navy for $25 when I grew "out" of my size 16s. And I only bought one pair and they're going to have to last me! This way I don't feel so bad about losing weight. I only buy things that I think will last me several sizes, like shirts, because I'm not going to become a size medium for a long time.

    Smart! I'm going to be doing the same thing; I needed some new clothes lately but have been scouring the sales racks as I don't intend on being this weight for too long. It's hard; I know in the past when I've dropped a dress size the excitement is so great I just wanted to rush out and buy everything in my new size! But it's expensive and when they start looking loose again; eep.

    I did go to a few garage sales though and found a really nice dress in a good brand which is in my goal size. I have it for motivation; squeezed into it recently (it looks terrible on me right now) and when I get there I will wear it again when it actually fits so I have comparison photos. It only cost me $4 so if for whatever reason I can't get to my goal it's no loss money-wise. Garage sales and thrift shops guys! Worth searching!
  • verptwerp
    verptwerp Posts: 3,659 Member
    bumping to read tomorrow ...... sweet dreams :yawn:
  • rharris86dc
    rharris86dc Posts: 635 Member
    The thing that nobody talked to me about - and I wasn't ready for - was that even though I knew I was smaller, I still FELT exactly the same. And not just felt the same, but I felt that I LOOKED the same, too.

    No matter how many pictures I saw of myself as a slimmer person, I never felt like that version of myself.

    Don't get me wrong, I LOVED buying new clothes, and shopping actually become fun again! But it kind of felt like a sham. I knew I was smaller, but I still felt like me, the fat girl.

    Which is I think where I went wrong. I had lost about 55 pounds, and loved it. But since I didn't FEEL like a different person, my fat girl habits snuck back in, and I ended up gaining most of the weight back. So here I am, just about starting over, and kicking myself.

    This time around, I am going to take actual progress pictures so I can see every step of the process, and so becoming slimmer doesn't sneak up on me like a happy surprise. This time around, I'm going to appreciate all of the hard work I am putting into myself, and I wont take it for granted. This time around, it is going to be permanent!
  • heidihorton
    heidihorton Posts: 110 Member
    The thing that nobody talked to me about - and I wasn't ready for - was that even though I knew I was smaller, I still FELT exactly the same. And not just felt the same, but I felt that I LOOKED the same, too.

    No matter how many pictures I saw of myself as a slimmer person, I never felt like that version of myself.

    Don't get me wrong, I LOVED buying new clothes, and shopping actually become fun again! But it kind of felt like a sham. I knew I was smaller, but I still felt like me, the fat girl.

    Which is I think where I went wrong. I had lost about 55 pounds, and loved it. But since I didn't FEEL like a different person, my fat girl habits snuck back in, and I ended up gaining most of the weight back. So here I am, just about starting over, and kicking myself.


    This time around, I am going to take actual progress pictures so I can see every step of the process, and so becoming slimmer doesn't sneak up on me like a happy surprise. This time around, I'm going to appreciate all of the hard work I am putting into myself, and I wont take it for granted. This time around, it is going to be permanent!

    Good luck!! I hope you reach your goal, I wish I would have taken more pics on my journey. I avoided cameras every chance I got!
  • yvnursechick
    yvnursechick Posts: 94 Member
    taking compliments fro coworks... saying wow you'velost weightwhen ifeel like im strugglng.
  • RunDoozer
    RunDoozer Posts: 1,699 Member
    How differently I would be treated.I kind of resent it sometimes.

    I'm the same person with the same personality and the same brain.

    Yet I was with the same company for 14 years and didn't get any of the promotions I put in for until I lost weight.

    THIS!!!!

    Man! I have noticed just how much my weight was impeding my job success too. Still pi$$es me off.

    I agree that it is horrible to pass someone up on jobs just because of their weight. And no one should have to go through that. But from what I have seen it is Confidence that get promotions more than anything else regardless of current skills even. The more confident in themselves and what theyre doing is way more likely to get promoted in my opinion.

    I dont know if you were as confident then as you are now that you are getting these promotions. You may have been in your mind but it wasn't projecting out in the way you thought it was to other people. I doubt the majority of people (always some *kitten* holes though) are thinking she's/he's fat lets not promote her. But when comparing two people theyre going to pick the person that seems like they feel like theyre more able to accomplish the job.

    If you look at peoples before and after pictures and just look at their faces. Youll tend to see how much happier they are with themselves and project that to other people.

    Hell even look at mine and I wasnt really too down on myself about my weight.

    All I'm saying is that sometimes it's us and not them.
  • veggiesaurus15
    veggiesaurus15 Posts: 152 Member
    That even after you've lost 90 pounds, you'll still think you look fat :/
  • Ejourneys
    Ejourneys Posts: 1,603 Member
    It's easier to be cold now without the extra insulation.

    THIS.

    Back in 2002 (when the picture in my avatar shot was taken), I thought I could get away with my usual windbreaker, walking in 50-degree breezy weather. I LITERALLY turned blue on my face and hands, I was that cold. A friend gave me his insulated flight suit and I jogged in place for 20 minutes in his apartment to warm my body core back up. That was a real eye-opener for me.

    Also, I'm not as comfortable on hard benches any more. (I'm currently not quite at that stage yet, but based on past experience I will be.)

    And my bowling started to really suck, now that my weight had changed dramatically in proportion to the weight of the ball. (I haven't bowled in years, so that really is no longer an issue with me.)

    On the positive side, I feel FABULOUS -- more energy, better able to cope, no cravings. The food I eat is awesome.

    I'm more wrinkly than I was the last time I lost this much weight, but menopause'll do that. I'm cool with it.

    Also, the vigilance doesn't stop once I reach my goal; maintenance is a whole other ball game. I plan to be better at it this time around, by using other ways to decrease my stress levels.
  • Hearts_2015
    Hearts_2015 Posts: 12,031 Member
    Being afraid to buy new clothes that fit because in a few months they won't fit so nicely. I hate to waste money, but I also hate looking homeless when I wear my worn out, three-sizes-too-big clothes.
    I find myself getting caught up in this..
    the way people suddenly like you more because you look different. according to the way society treats you, your value goes up as your weight goes down. that's honestly the hardest part to deal with... the realization that that's all people really care about.
    It feels that way sometimes doesn't it
  • Probably changing the way I eat as a lifestyle. I went to a friends house the other day and they wanted to order pizza, and knew I was changing my eating habits, so they were trying to plan around me, I mean it is nice..but I have cut a lot out, and they don't understand that a Fast Food Premium salad with lots of meat is NOT healthy for me..better than pizza..but I just hate how people say, "Well, I know you cant eat this" or "Oh, we should of bought a 2 liter of diet pop for you" Im like, "Do you have a sink, that has water in it?". I just get overwhelmed by it.
  • PunkyRachel
    PunkyRachel Posts: 1,959 Member
    The springs in our old worn out mattress stab me and I can feel them dig into my ribs, hips, other bones. The smaller I get the more painful, and its so hard to get comfortable at night.
  • AmandaMarie916
    AmandaMarie916 Posts: 75 Member
    being proud of your new body. I'm excited about wearing shorts this summer but terrified at the same time.
  • PunkyRachel
    PunkyRachel Posts: 1,959 Member
    My rings are so loose now....need to size them down!

    Yes! I stopped wearing my wedding ring, because it literally just falls off now. I want till I get to my GW before sizing it down
  • Hezzietiger1
    Hezzietiger1 Posts: 1,256 Member
    You can lose weight eating at a deficit but no diet compares to what eating healthy does. Nutrition causes changes in body composition that a simple deficit won't do. I wish I would have started eating clean a lot sooner than I did.
  • MizTerry
    MizTerry Posts: 3,763 Member
    The comments from people " oh, she can't eat that so no need to make it" I think that non dieters have no idea that we still EAT! That and the clothes... I have bought 5 new sizes this year, lots of money loss. We should start a clothing trade on here !!!! :)

    Best idea ever!
  • sunshine11111
    sunshine11111 Posts: 48 Member
    Yes. I know what you mean.
  • FinFoxPT
    FinFoxPT Posts: 106 Member
    Being afraid to buy new clothes that fit because in a few months they won't fit so nicely. I hate to waste money, but I also hate looking homeless when I wear my worn out, three-sizes-too-big clothes.

    I've had to come to terms with this, it's hard because the old clothes feel so familiar but u have to let go.

    For me it's not feeling like myself. It's that feeling of being in a no mans land between the bigger me and the smaller me i've been before. Not easy but you have to remember the overall goal.

    Fin x
  • missyyclaire
    missyyclaire Posts: 572 Member
    That there is a new found sense of calm and peace that happens over the long term when you're doing something right for yourself, like eating properly, exercising regularly, keeping on a budget etc...it's nice to find a little calm in this crazy world by simply taking proper care of things
  • Amazigh926
    Amazigh926 Posts: 33 Member
    I thought it was all about losing weight but it isn't, it's about dealing with the emotional issues that drive you to eat. And that is the hardest thing-- ever! Responding to these triggers in a different way-- it's easy for "others" to tell you to take a walk or chew gum or blah blah blah, but they don't have any idea what you are going through, emotionally, when you are used to drowning your sorrows in food but then you can't anymore because you have made the choice -and change- to not continue to do that. The anxiety that surrounds that decision is intense expecially when there is an argument with a spouse or family member and you want to go back to yoru old bad ways but you just can't. There is no going back but it is really, really difficult to stay the course, emotionally draining and super-stressful. Maybe it's just me???
  • Forphuksake
    Forphuksake Posts: 1 Member
    Not trying to be a smart *kitten* here, but, there are many options out there to be rid of the excess skin associated with weight loss. Try doing a search online and also talking to your doctor, not all remedies involve ugly/unsightly scarring. There is no reason that you shouldn't go out and parade around in your bikini, lord knows you should be very proud of your achievement and you shouldn't be afraid to show it off. I am not trying to be sleazy either, I am happily married and am also on the weight loss campaign, just trying to cheer you up a little and give you some more encouragement.
  • fairykelly13
    fairykelly13 Posts: 79 Member
    I had to buy a new helmet for off-roading! My face got so much thinner that my old one didn't fit anymore!

    And the only thing I could keep of my old wardrobe were my socks!
  • mhorn2142
    mhorn2142 Posts: 319 Member
    The springs in our old worn out mattress stab me and I can feel them dig into my ribs, hips, other bones. The smaller I get the more painful, and its so hard to get comfortable at night.

    lol. yes!!!
  • kmm7309
    kmm7309 Posts: 802 Member
    ...obsessing now that I am skinny that I will wake up fat, exercising allllllllllllllllll the time! Afraid of gaining a pound, I believe I have created me somewhat of a food disorder...

    THIS! My abnormal psych teacher told me that I have "disordered eating" patterns. She said it's not healthy to be afraid of gaining a pound, or eating too many calories, or looking up restaurant foods and basing my social life around the places I can eat at. She said I shouldn't know exactly how many calories and carbs are in so many different foods, and that exercising just to eat more is crazy.

    And sometimes it feels crazy...

    *disclaimer: I am not "skinny", just smaller
  • Being afraid to buy new clothes that fit because in a few months they won't fit so nicely. I hate to waste money, but I also hate looking homeless when I wear my worn out, three-sizes-too-big clothes.
    This is so true I hate this problem :(
  • kmm7309
    kmm7309 Posts: 802 Member
    Also, I get sick of weighing myself. I am always weighing myself, obsessively. Every morning I weigh myself. I know I don't have to weigh myself this often, but honestly, I am so afraid that I'll wake up after eating a cupcake and be 269 again. I haven't seen that number in a year now but I'm always so afraid of it. I even get on the scale with my (55 pound) dog to make sure that I'm still under 269. It's just awful to worry so much, even though I know it's impossible to gain 65 pounds over night.
  • blytheandbonnie
    blytheandbonnie Posts: 3,275 Member
    Also, I get sick of weighing myself. I am always weighing myself, obsessively. Every morning I weigh myself. I know I don't have to weigh myself this often, but honestly, I am so afraid that I'll wake up after eating a cupcake and be 269 again. I haven't seen that number in a year now but I'm always so afraid of it. I even get on the scale with my (55 pound) dog to make sure that I'm still under 269. It's just awful to worry so much, even though I know it's impossible to gain 65 pounds over night.
    Oh, I know what you mean! I'm so sure that one of these days, I'm going to step on my scale and find out that the whole thing was a dream, or a cruel joke and all I have achieved will be gone! *POOF* HUGE AGAIN!
    What is that?! :noway: