Advise me please

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2

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  • KCoolBeanz
    KCoolBeanz Posts: 813 Member
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    Option 2.

    When I was a kid my goldfish died, and I thought it was "sleeping", and I told everyone who would listen. My parents left it in the bowl for like 3 days becuase they didn't have the heart to tell me it was dead (LOL!!). I got suspicious when it got skeletal. :P
  • sunsnstatheart
    sunsnstatheart Posts: 2,544 Member
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    My ex wasn't ready to deal with the fact that his sons hedgehog died. So he put him in a plastic container, taped it all up, marked it "Dad's please do not touch" and put it in the freezer.

    I, being the respectful girlfriend, did not touch and moved that carton through two house moves. Finally after it being in the freezer for 3 years, I got nosy (shame on me) and opened it up.

    I promptly screamed....which brought the kids running....

    and then we had to deal with the whole

    OMG THAT'S where Pixel went!!!! You said he ran away Dad!!!

    and the crying...holy hell the crying....

    so I would say option two.

    ^ This is why option 2 is best. Kids eventually figure out that you lied. Besides, living things die. It's a good life lesson and starting with a fish is a good approach. Have you seen the "Harold and the Purple Crayon" episode on "Goldie?" It worked for us.
  • Alex_is_Hawks
    Alex_is_Hawks Posts: 3,499 Member
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    My ex wasn't ready to deal with the fact that his sons hedgehog died. So he put him in a plastic container, taped it all up, marked it "Dad's please do not touch" and put it in the freezer.

    I, being the respectful girlfriend, did not touch and moved that carton through two house moves. Finally after it being in the freezer for 3 years, I got nosy (shame on me) and opened it up.

    I promptly screamed....which brought the kids running....

    and then we had to deal with the whole

    OMG THAT'S where Pixel went!!!! You said he ran away Dad!!!

    and the crying...holy hell the crying....

    so I would say option two.

    ^ This is why option 2 is best. Kids eventually figure out that you lied. Besides, living things die. It's a good life lesson and starting with a fish is a good approach. Have you seen the "Harold and the Purple Crayon" episode on "Goldie?" It worked for us.

    VERY true...and now both those boys are very paranoid when it comes to pets and their father.

    everytime he had to take a dog to the vet for a check up, they would get extremely suspicious and worried....

    sure that the pet wasn't going to come back or would get "lost" again...

    so he's made his bed in that regard....

    trust...with kids it's a big deal.....they trust you to show them the way....they really do...and they never forget when you fail them.
  • alishacupcake
    alishacupcake Posts: 419 Member
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    My ex wasn't ready to deal with the fact that his sons hedgehog died. So he put him in a plastic container, taped it all up, marked it "Dad's please do not touch" and put it in the freezer.

    I, being the respectful girlfriend, did not touch and moved that carton through two house moves. Finally after it being in the freezer for 3 years, I got nosy (shame on me) and opened it up.

    I promptly screamed....which brought the kids running....

    and then we had to deal with the whole

    OMG THAT'S where Pixel went!!!! You said he ran away Dad!!!

    and the crying...holy hell the crying....

    so I would say option two.

    This is awful, hilarious. But awful. LOL

    Edited: Oh yea, and Option 2. I have a 3 year old. You gotta level with them, deal with the meltdown but honestly.
  • jessicas082409
    jessicas082409 Posts: 75 Member
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    Option 2, kids understand more than we give them credit for. We lost our pitpull last year and my (then) 4yr old sat with him through out the day until he passed....it is going to involve a lot of answering questions...and then more questions....but it's part of being a parent. My son took it very well, he was sad but understood puppy wasn't hurt anymore and was in puppy heaven and such. I think you should ask him if he wants another fish b/f just buying another one...
  • Scott2ndGradeTeacher
    Scott2ndGradeTeacher Posts: 147 Member
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    There are no easy choices, but option two is the best in my opinion.

    Anything we can do to help this generation of children have a better sense of balance in their lives is a good thing. All too often, we try to insultate kids from the bad parts fo life "for their own good".

    (...and then we wonder why 30 year old "men" are unemployed and living in their mother's basement.)

    The "Everybody gets a Trophy" mentatility, where there are no losers or negative consequences is killing this country.
  • thebigcb
    thebigcb Posts: 2,210 Member
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    Flush it and tell him he was Nemo and must of climbed out the window with the help of Jacque etc and that we'll have to get another one tomorrow
  • sizzle74
    sizzle74 Posts: 858 Member
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    2.

    It's sad that you even have to ask..

    Do you have kids? When my son's fish died when he was about 4 or 5 he freaked out. Started asking where he went when he dies and if he would still have his bones, etc. He was TERRIFIED. This is not a suprising parental question IMO.

    Good luck OP.....I think you will handle it beautifully. :)
  • Wonderwoman2677
    Wonderwoman2677 Posts: 434 Member
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    Option 2. Being honest is a quality I think we all want in our kids... they learn what we teach.

    He's 3, he'll either not care, or he'll cry for a bit and then forget. Ask him if he wants another fish.

    Also, it helps him learn about death in an easier situation than with a family member. It's a part of life, it sucks, but it's better for them to have some understanding and be able to talk to you about it. Just don't lead his responses or questions. Offer your condolences and let him guide you on how much to tell him.
  • sullus
    sullus Posts: 2,839 Member
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    What about option 5: Leave the dead fish for the kid to find on his own.
  • LaurenAOK
    LaurenAOK Posts: 2,475 Member
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    My mother did option #3 when my dad died.

    OMFG. :laugh:
  • DebbieLyn63
    DebbieLyn63 Posts: 2,650 Member
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    Option 3. He's 3 year's old people save the life lesson's for the next fish.

    ^^ Agree! Ignorance can be such bliss at this age.
  • Momma_Grizz
    Momma_Grizz Posts: 294 Member
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    Option 3. He's 3 year's old people save the life lesson's for the next fish.

    ^^^This. He's 3. No need to traumatize him.
  • sizzle74
    sizzle74 Posts: 858 Member
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    Option 3. He's 3 year's old people save the life lesson's for the next fish.

    ^^ Agree! Ignorance can be such bliss at this age.

    Agreed! But I also feel he will be ok if she tells him and they run and buy a new fish together.
  • DebbieLyn63
    DebbieLyn63 Posts: 2,650 Member
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    My ex wasn't ready to deal with the fact that his sons hedgehog died. So he put him in a plastic container, taped it all up, marked it "Dad's please do not touch" and put it in the freezer.

    I, being the respectful girlfriend, did not touch and moved that carton through two house moves. Finally after it being in the freezer for 3 years, I got nosy (shame on me) and opened it up.

    I promptly screamed....which brought the kids running....

    and then we had to deal with the whole

    OMG THAT'S where Pixel went!!!! You said he ran away Dad!!!

    and the crying...holy hell the crying....

    so I would say option two.

    LOL, that is disturbing on so many levels. And the fact that I laughed so hard when I read it, is slightly disturbing to me as well. Will have to share this story with my husband when he gets home. He's a bit warped like me.
  • Mainebikerchick
    Mainebikerchick Posts: 1,573 Member
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    My ex wasn't ready to deal with the fact that his sons hedgehog died. So he put him in a plastic container, taped it all up, marked it "Dad's please do not touch" and put it in the freezer.

    I, being the respectful girlfriend, did not touch and moved that carton through two house moves. Finally after it being in the freezer for 3 years, I got nosy (shame on me) and opened it up.

    I promptly screamed....which brought the kids running....

    and then we had to deal with the whole

    OMG THAT'S where Pixel went!!!! You said he ran away Dad!!!

    and the crying...holy hell the crying....

    so I would say option two.

    DEAR LORD!! Can't make that *kitten* up!!!

    OP, definitely Option 2. Honestly is always the best way to go.
  • Christizzzle
    Christizzzle Posts: 454 Member
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    Option 3. He's 3 year's old people save the life lesson's for the next fish.

    I'm with you here.
  • DebbieLyn63
    DebbieLyn63 Posts: 2,650 Member
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    Trying to remember back to when my kids were little and how we dealt with dead fish. I think they kinda got a kick out of having 'fish funerals' which meant saying goodbye to them as we flushed them down to 'fishy heaven'.

    So perhaps option 2 is the best one after all.

    (trying to figure out if my girls suffered any mental trauma or if their bad choices in life later on could be tied to my handling of said dead fish.) Mommy guilt NEVER ends. SMH
  • sizzle74
    sizzle74 Posts: 858 Member
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    I am requesitng an update please. :flowerforyou:
  • DebbieLyn63
    DebbieLyn63 Posts: 2,650 Member
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    Flush it and tell him he was Nemo and must of climbed out the window with the help of Jacque etc and that we'll have to get another one tomorrow

    ^^Winner

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