How to dump a guy without being mean?

Options
123468

Replies

  • Guillotined
    Guillotined Posts: 115
    Options
    ^^^ and don't get me wrong, I know what most *kitten* guys are capable of, and I've seen physical abuse. So if you are being harmed, please call the police =]
  • TubbsMcGee
    TubbsMcGee Posts: 1,058 Member
    Options
    I've been in this situation before, It's not fun.

    After having him cry and hang around me like a puppy, I finally had to come out and tell him that there was someone else.
    Of course at the time, I couldn't tell him it was his best friend...but I'm glad I ended it, as I've been with said friend for over 7 years now.

    I know. I'm a jerk.
  • Guillotined
    Guillotined Posts: 115
    Options
    Don't know about dumping a guy, as I never have. But my husband (the father of my 3 sons) left me by postcard.

    Where was the postcard from?! Lol
  • Queen_JessieA
    Queen_JessieA Posts: 1,059 Member
    Options
    if you have done it nicely....and he's not getting it....then you just may have to get mean...

    it's hard......but some men need that....

    they really do.

    I have to agree. You just need to be brutally honest. Or have the "new guy friend" do it. (Even if you have to have a male friend pretend).
  • Lift_This_
    Lift_This_ Posts: 2,756 Member
    Options
    Just tell him the truth. You don't see it going anywhere, you're just not happy in the relationship anymore etc.
    That’s what I did. I told my ex that while he was a great guy, he wasn’t the right person for me. It got to the point where our whole relationship was a series of compromises from both of us, and it wasn’t worth it. So I told him exactly that, no hard feelings.

    this sounds pretty good....then put a box of all his things outside his door...then he may get the picture.
  • AllTehBeers
    AllTehBeers Posts: 5,030 Member
    Options
    Is he showing up on your door step? That's stalker and needs policee involvement.

    Um yeah, no. Please do not call the police because a guy you just dumped showed up at your door. If he shows up with a gun, or if he refuses to leave and you truly feel you are in danger, have at it. But being annoyed that someone you actually have a personal relationship with won't get the hint that it's over does not constitute being stalked. The police have bigger fish to fry.

    Just.... thank you....=]

    I'm sorry, if I tell someone I don't want to see/talk/text or be any part of their life, they randomly show up at my door and won't leave when I ask, I think that deserves an escort.

    You have to realize the damage you do to someone by getting a restraining order. There's many ways to avoid it, so many that there's no point in listing them. A restraining order was and is meant for people in DANGER. Yes, someone showing up to your doorstep and crying and begging is annoying. But so are telemarketers, so are beggars, so are step parents. If you aren't in danger, why waste the police and sheriff departments time? I'm sure at least one in your life you've said out loud "where are the cops when you really need them?!" Well there's your answer.

    I never said restraining order. I said if the guy shows up at your house and doesn't leave to call the cops so he leaves your property.

    Obviously my first post was taken wrong, as you can see one single phrase was clipped and focused on. My whole post was just restating everyone who said "ignore him."
  • aaronlawrenc
    aaronlawrenc Posts: 666 Member
    Options
    Get drunk and sleep with one of his family members.

    Unless you're in West Virginia, in which case you'll automatically become a member of the family.


    Very good advice here....

    or not get drunk and sleep with two of his family members. that way he knows it was intentional.
  • lenoresaari
    lenoresaari Posts: 500 Member
    Options
    gy in the rain; too funny

    m already on this thread....

    :laugh:
  • etoiles_argentees
    etoiles_argentees Posts: 2,827 Member
    Options
    Get drunk and sleep with one of his family members.

    Unless you're in West Virginia, in which case you'll automatically become a member of the family.


    Very good advice here....

    or not get drunk and sleep with two of his family members. that way he knows it was intentional.

    :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
  • nolachick
    nolachick Posts: 3,278 Member
    Options
    I would suggest....to stop responding to him and engaging him?

    Complete broscience.

    lol you would be surprised. I went out on ONE date with a guy last year. I tried to be nice even tho I knew I wasn't interested, I kept saying I was busy but he didn't get the hint, then I finally told him I wasn't interested and he still didn't get the hint. every now and again he will still text me. I've stopped responding.
  • nolachick
    nolachick Posts: 3,278 Member
    Options
    Get drunk and sleep with one of his family members.

    Unless you're in West Virginia, in which case you'll automatically become a member of the family.


    Very good advice here....

    or not get drunk and sleep with two of his family members. that way he knows it was intentional.

    :laugh: ur funny!
  • AIZZO4
    AIZZO4 Posts: 404 Member
    Options
    Just sleep with someone else and tell him. He will run. Plus it will be fun for you.

    Damn! Heartless

    What???? It works like a charm I tell you.

    Yea but that might really hurt him
  • AIZZO4
    AIZZO4 Posts: 404 Member
    Options
    Some of you people are rough. Glad I am not dating you....lol
  • SANDRA_F26
    SANDRA_F26 Posts: 180
    Options
    Wait... What is he still doing? Is he acting like you simply didn't break up? Begging for a second chance? Stalking?


    After all you've done, I'm baffled.

    I changed my textplus number but kept my regular cell number, so he keeps texting, keeps texting, saying he loves me. I finally messaged him back, to tell him AGAIN that I do not want to be with him anymore, I said he couldn't call me on the phone, or come back on my FB, but that we could still talk as friends, he immediately goes right back into asking me who I am talking to and trying to tell me what to do, which is the main reason I dumped him in the first place. So now, I feel like I have to dump him ALL OVER, even though I never said I'd changed my mind. It's just frustrating.
    Girl get you some pepper spray and or a taeser gun. can you say psychopath? like really this sounds like the beginning of those stories you hear of girls who go missing and noone really knows what happened to them. Just saying. . . . stay safe!
  • fara180
    fara180 Posts: 1,260 Member
    Options
    tell him that you want to focus on yourself and that you don't feel like either of you can grow as people while being together. be sure to let him know that you really did enjoy your time together but you aren't right for each other.

    and then block his facebook, his cell phone number, home phone number and his family members that are crazy enough to try to get in contact with you. if he takes it a step further and starts coming by your house- threaten to get a restraining order.

    been there, done that, got the t-shirt.
  • usernameMAMA
    usernameMAMA Posts: 681 Member
    Options
    Cold Turkey. Doing it nicely makes us guys think that there might be something left. If you do it cold turkey, and blunt, i'll get the picture and never call again. Try it. It sounds mean, but its actually the only way that works.

    ^This right here. Like a band aid, rip it off and throw it away. Cut off all communication because it just gets messy and confusing for the dumpee.
  • NutellaAddict
    NutellaAddict Posts: 1,258 Member
    Options
    "I'm Pregnant."
  • unicorns_rock
    unicorns_rock Posts: 5
    Options
    Ohhhhhhh can I chime in? :X
  • AIZZO4
    AIZZO4 Posts: 404 Member
    Options
    "I'm Pregnant."

    Ball Game!!!!
  • freddykid
    freddykid Posts: 265 Member
    Options
    Tell one of his friends he is creeping you out and ask them talk to him. If he knows someone else is aware that you want nothing to do with him it may sink in. The minute you air his needy/creepy-guy laundry to his friends it should stop. UNLESS he is a stalker or serial killer then it will get worse.

Categories