You dont get a second date.....

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  • smtillman2
    smtillman2 Posts: 756 Member
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    If they have more than $10,000 worth of debt.
    If they don't have a career or at least working towards it currently.
    If they have more guy friends than female friends.
    If you have an arrest record.

    How do you find this stuff out on a first date? Clearly my conversation over coffee isn't nearly in depth enough.
  • richardheath
    richardheath Posts: 1,276 Member
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    If they have more than $10,000 worth of debt.
    If they don't have a career or at least working towards it currently.
    If they have more guy friends than female friends.
    If you have an arrest record.

    How do you find this stuff out on a first date? Clearly my conversation over coffee isn't nearly in depth enough.

    That's what I was thinking! If you hired a Private Investigator to check me out after the first date, you won't be getting a second one anyway!
  • enigmachik
    enigmachik Posts: 150
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    I know you want to get laid, but if you try on the first date, you'll never get a second date. If we go to a restaurant and you complain about the food or have it taken back, that will probably be it. There are exceptions, but not many because I don't want to date someone who is never satisfied and a first date is all about first impressions. Being rude to anyone (especially someone who is working) will be the end of us as well. Lastly, if you've made up your mind that you don't want kids. If you already have kids and don't want more, that's fine (as long as you're a good dad who is present in their lives), but if you don't want kids at all we have a problem.
  • WannaDizzolve
    WannaDizzolve Posts: 270 Member
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    if you are aggressive, either physically or verbally, if you complain about your ex or paying child support, if drinking too much is obviously a pattern (especially if you have no license because of DUI), if you use hard drugs, if you stare at every woman who walks by (or any woman, for that matter.), if you have bad teeth or poor hygeine. if you are disrespectful of me or the waitstaff.

    i'd say if you were vegan, but i'm kind of dating one.

    i guess that's it.
  • Mustang_Susie
    Mustang_Susie Posts: 7,045 Member
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    if he is too pushy with physical things when his gestures are obviously unwanted...i once had a guy who tried to kiss me at the end of our first date and i just wasnt feeling him so i turned my cheek...well then he grabbed my face, turned my head and kissed me anyway. it was nasty and i literally wanted scrub my lips with bleach after that

    Wow...:noway:
  • StrongAndHealthyMommy
    StrongAndHealthyMommy Posts: 1,255 Member
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    If they have more than $10,000 worth of debt.
    If they don't have a career or at least working towards it currently.
    If they have more guy friends than female friends.
    If you have an arrest record.

    How do you find this stuff out on a first date? Clearly my conversation over coffee isn't nearly in depth enough.

    that's exactly what I thought.... plus if I have a guy asking for my financial status... I would be like.... eeeeeehhhhh I just met you... it isn't on your business how much money I have in the bank... are you looking for a girlfriend or a sugar mama????
  • BrendaLee
    BrendaLee Posts: 4,463 Member
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    If he doesn't smell good on the first date, I'm probably not going to be too interested in a second.
  • TwinkieDong
    TwinkieDong Posts: 1,564 Member
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    Doesn't #2 depend? Say you meet a dentist, a doctor, a business professional, a lawyer. Chances are they will have more than $10k in debt, more than likely in a form of education loans.
    If they keep checking there phone while on the first date.
    If they have more than $10,000 worth of debt.
    If there teeth are yellow or crooked.
    If they don't have a career or at least working towards it currently.
    If they have more guy friends than female friends.
    If you are crazy, clinging or have an arrest record.
  • k8eekins
    k8eekins Posts: 2,264 Member
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    what a person has to do to don't get a second date with you????

    to me.... If the person is a smoker I wont date him again... (and of course... If I know before we date that he smokes, he wont even get a first date with me)

    Years ago during my youth: I wouldn't date any man who'd dated and was intimate with a relative or a friend and even those within my social network circle ~ just a taboo, for we're too interlocked.

    Since then within my years as a mature woman: It depends. Sometimes the guy comes on too strong too soon with too much ~ no 2nd date. If he interprets dinner conversation to resemble nothing short of what I see as impolite ~ like an inquisition or a job interview ~ i am out of there ~ no 2nd date.

    Basically, if it lacks fluidity ... Has too many bumps ~ I'm quick to accept that it clearly isn't working, so I'll make the best of it ~ I'll let him ramble (subtly posing questions he'll only be too eager to expand on) whilst going through the paces.
  • matt2442
    matt2442 Posts: 1,259 Member
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    If they keep checking there phone while on the first date.
    If they have more than $10,000 worth of debt.
    If there teeth are yellow or crooked.
    If they don't have a career or at least working towards it currently.
    If they have more guy friends than female friends.
    If you are crazy, clinging or have an arrest record.

    do you bring all of this on a clipboard?
  • pobalita
    pobalita Posts: 741 Member
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    If he talks bad about his exes
    If he is sarcastic or rude to others
    If he is a deadbeat parent
    If he has a big ego
    If there is no physical chemistry.

    If we met through an online site, no second date if he lied in his profile or provided a picture that doesn't look like him. I showed up for a date once with a man who claimed to be 45 - I was 42. When I met him, he confessed to being 55 - "but his friends always tell him he looks younger". I'm still not convinced that the last guy I met was even the same guy as the picture in his profile.:laugh:
  • CheriLMT
    CheriLMT Posts: 220 Member
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    After the relationship I just got out of I know one thing I want in my Significant Other.....employment....being with an unmotivated person is so exhausting and it starts to bring down because the bar is set so low...but out with old in with the being single :)
  • paintedr3d
    paintedr3d Posts: 40
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    If she does anything sexual with me there's absolutely no way I'd respect her enough for a second date. I may just show up at midnite on just "chill" though lol
  • kaylacollinscna
    kaylacollinscna Posts: 102 Member
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    There's lots of things that will make or break a date for me.

    I will not ask someone on a second date if:
    They are racist.
    They are homophobic.
    They are impatient and inconsiderate with the waiter or waitress, especially on a busy day.
    They don't like dogs (this is a -must- for me. I grew up with dogs and intend on having one or two. And they'll be medium-big sized dogs)
    They're sexist.
    They mention anything about polyamory. (I respect other peoples needs/choices, however I'm very monogamous and couldn't handle a polyamorous relationship).
    They don't respect my non-religion.
    They're too emotionally unstable or clingy.
    They're boring and can only make small talk.
    They don't have a plan for the future nor seem to care about developing a career and becoming more independent.
    They want too much too soon. (You know what I mean... I take things super slow.)

    On the other side some major turn ons/bonuses include:
    Being an animal lover.
    Being kind of nerdy. I'm a gamer, and it's fun to have someone to play with and also geek out about other nerdy things.
    Willingness to try something new and step out of your comfort zone as well as make me step out of mine. Instead of having a typical dinner and a movie date show that you're adventurous and suggest something more out of the norm.
  • confab151
    confab151 Posts: 298 Member
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    If you have some kind of 'master list' that completely spells out the 'do's and don't' for me, yet somehow, I'm not supposed to know, ask or judge any of the choices you've made in YOUR life. In other words, just have fun and enjoy having a good time on your first date....jeez.
  • FitnessCharl
    FitnessCharl Posts: 166
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    Some of these lists are huge... My main thing is he has to be a nice guy, with a good sense of humour and a brain...
    I don’t really care if he is a smoker or has yellow teeth or more than £10,000 worth of debt because these are all changeable factors in a persons life. It wont matter a damn if he has a smile like Tom Cruise and is debt free, if he cant make you laugh or have a good conversation with you.
  • raychulj
    raychulj Posts: 458 Member
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    If your breath smells
    You don't like cats
    You put me down
    You eat off my plate without asking (I'd gladly share on request)
    You use the "N" word even if you're black.
    You want me to meet your mom ( this is our first date)
    You don't like kids
    Your t-shirt says something vulgur....Haha this is fun
  • Cr01502
    Cr01502 Posts: 3,614 Member
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    I'm sick of 'cruisy' guys.

    We can rule this guy out then?

    tomcruise_zps6a13498d.gif
  • raychulj
    raychulj Posts: 458 Member
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    I'm sick of 'cruisy' guys.

    We can rule this guy out then?

    tomcruise_zps6a13498d.gif
    ugh HATE HIM!
  • xALEXANDROx
    xALEXANDROx Posts: 3,416 Member
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    if you failed the first .

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