This may sound evil, but....keeping it real.

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Replies

  • Mr_Bad_Example
    Mr_Bad_Example Posts: 2,403 Member
    I'm working really hard to get fit. By the time I get married and start thinking about having kids I will have gotten my goal body. So after all that work, I can't help but think how bad it would suck to have a baby and gain it all back plus some.

    I call a troll.

    But if you're not a troll, then I call conceited.
  • Recovery_Girl
    Recovery_Girl Posts: 10
    Not evil, a little shallow. But also really understandable when you're coming from a place of working so hard to finally achieve feeling better about yourself and looking better.

    I'd say just enjoy being married and see where your heart is when it comes to having kids later. You can stay healthy and active during pregnancy easily enough as others have pointed out. As long as you run your activity by your doctor. Or you could always choose to not have children or adopt. Although a lot of kids who need to be adopted have horrible self images because of prior abuse so you would really need to be body positive for them, regardless of weight. It really just comes down to attitude. If you don't think you can lose the pregnancy weight or look as good afterwards, it's just self defeating. The best thing to do is have a child when you're ready and take the issue of weight gain as it comes.
  • redheaddee
    redheaddee Posts: 2,005 Member
    It's better to go into it fit, than not. You'll rebound a lot quicker :)

    Not only this, but labor will be easier. Generally speaking, your doctor will tell you to do what you have always done and let your body tell you when to stop. No worries!

    If you don't want 'em, don't have 'em. You are so very young and still in the egocentric phase of your life. Better to not have kids when you still think the planets revolve around you. Just keepin' it real.
  • lioness803
    lioness803 Posts: 325 Member
    I wasn't in shape at all when I got pregnant, but I hardly gained any baby weight, maybe 5-10lbs at the most. All pregnancies are different, but if you continue walking or light workouts and eat sensibly, you won't necessarily put on 50 pounds or anything.

    If you do, it's worth it :)
  • Wrenbot87
    Wrenbot87 Posts: 100 Member
    I had lost 60 pounds before I found out I was pregnant. Through my pregnancy I only put on 25 pounds (he was almost 8 pounds). I gained back the other 35 pounds after I had him. I lost control of my tendency to stress eat. But, I've managed to get back on my feet. He is worth it. Trust me, that first time they call you mama your heart melts. If you want to have babies, have them. I walked every day I was pregnant (up to 4 miles a day). So you don't have to gain copious amounts of weight to be a mother. I suspect it's more than just "I don't want to be fat" though in your case. Maybe get to the root of that. Congrats on the soon coming nuptials though!
  • Laura_Ivy
    Laura_Ivy Posts: 555 Member
    Don't have babies. It's not a requirement (although society would have you think so). Plenty of other folks out there breeding, no reason for you to do it if you don't want to.

    Many, many people are childfree.

    Breeding like we are cattle? I mean...really now? I commend people who know that having children is not for them but why the disrespectful term for something as beautiful as pregnancy/giving birth/child rearing. Thank goodness your Momma decided to be a breeder,eh? o_O
  • MireyGal76
    MireyGal76 Posts: 7,334 Member
    I have delivered two almost 9lb babies. They are 5 and 7. I look the best I've ever looked.

    However, until you have a better opinion towards what having children is all about.... Double bag and pill it... Cuz you are not ready.
  • catrinaHwechanged
    catrinaHwechanged Posts: 4,907 Member
    They are worth it!! Worth every pound and every stretch mark.
  • devil_in_a_blue_dress
    devil_in_a_blue_dress Posts: 5,214 Member
    Um, I gained 16 pounds and ALL was gone when I got home from the hospital. You don't automatically gain 100 pounds. Some women do because of health problems, so just over eating either because they feel free to or because they legitimately feel hungry -- but it's not a sure thing. A "normal" pregnancy is only gaining 25-35 pounds. 4 of that is placenta, 8 is baby, 2 is fluid. That's 14 gone at birth. you only have 11-21 more to go. The key is to remain active and mindful of your body.

    In my case, I was horrendously sick and would avoid pregnancy at almost any cost now because of that. But I know other women who loved it and did gain a lot of weight -- either way, the baby kind of makes up for all of that.
  • VpinkLotus
    VpinkLotus Posts: 849 Member
    Not gonna lie. Baby girl, it SUCKS ;)
  • AllTehBeers
    AllTehBeers Posts: 5,030 Member
    I have delivered two almost 9lb babies. They are 5 and 7. I look the best I've ever looked.

    However, until you have a better opinion towards what having children is all about.... Double bag and pill it... Cuz you are not ready.

    Yep.

    I'll add a pull out to the end of that just for good measure.
  • Going4Lean
    Going4Lean Posts: 1,078 Member
    If you work out while pregnant it wont be alot of work to get back i think.

    We had a pregnant lady at the gym and she worked out till the end and when she came back you would never have thought she had a baby.
  • Nefetete
    Nefetete Posts: 343 Member
    When u are ready to have kids u won't much care about anything else. So till then stop worrying about it.
  • danasings
    danasings Posts: 8,218 Member
    I see pregnant women in the gym frequently, some of them even doing Bodypump. When you truly want a child of your own, this won't make a difference. I would hate to think someone decided against children because of weight gain.

    If someone decided against children because of weight gain, the world is probably better off. Just keeping it real.

    I have had two children and have close to my ideal body. Yes, the belly part still needs work, but I am getting there. My boys are worth not having a flat stomach...not that I had one before they were born.
  • Beezil
    Beezil Posts: 1,677 Member
    I completely understand your point of view and can certainly relate. Got pregnant with my 10 year old son at 16, gave birth at 17. I was not ready to be a mom - to say the least. I didn't want to get fat, have my skin stretched out, have to be responsible for another human being, none of that appealed to me at all. Thankfully, his father is a wonderful man, now my husband, and helped me through all of the struggles.

    I'm not going to tell you having kids is great and totally worth the ravages it puts your body through, or that you should do it because it's a wonderful part of life. It's not like that for everyone, which is why a lot of people don't have children. Nothing wrong with that. It's better in my opinion for someone to know they're not ready and choose not to have a child than to be careless (like say for example, teenage me) and get pregnant by accident to have a child they're obviously unprepared for.

    I love my son, more than life itself, but there are plenty of days I wish I'd waited just a bit longer before having a kid so I'd be more mature and ready to handle it. When you're ready, you'll know, and you won't care about the aftermath on your body, permanent or impermanent. :)

    Plus, there is always adoption. I think it's a highly underrated option that too few people look into.
  • _namaste_
    _namaste_ Posts: 246
    After three beautiful babies I look better now than ever before. Do I have stretch marks? Yep. Am I still working on the last of my tummy trouble area? Yep. But I wouldn't change any of it for the whole world on a golden platter - my kids (and my husband) are my life. Worth every stretch mark and extra fat %. lol. ;) Plus if you get into a great lifestyle now, you will be able to continue on and keep healthy and fit during pregnancy. I only wish I would have been in that position it would have made everything a whole lot easier! :D
  • peggysue218
    peggysue218 Posts: 126 Member
    I'm working really hard to get fit. By the time I get married and start thinking about having kids I will have gotten my goal body. So after all that work, I can't help but think how bad it would suck to have a baby and gain it all back plus some.

    I also can't fathom how women allow this to happen. I'm thoroughly grossed out by the thought of conception, carriage, and birth of a child. Then, after all of that sacrifice and pain, you have to be chained to it 24/7 and never truly be independent again. I can't imagine anything worse. But then... I Google before/after pics of women's stomachs and I become truly terrified. I know that a lot of women can "recover" from the damage, but many are not fortunate enough despite their best efforts. If vanity were my only issue, I'd probably be able to overcome it. I have much bigger issues (obviously) than that, though. No kids for me. If you don't want kids either, regardless of your reason(s), there's nothing wrong with that.
  • lovelyMYlovely
    lovelyMYlovely Posts: 1,066 Member
    i have 2 kids and im still tiny... i lost it all... :) so its different with everyone.. AND i didnt get any stretch marks..
  • PikaKnight
    PikaKnight Posts: 34,971 Member
    Don't have babies. It's not a requirement (although society would have you think so). Plenty of other folks out there breeding, no reason for you to do it if you don't want to.

    Many, many people are childfree.

    Breeding like we are cattle? I mean...really now? I commend people who know that having children is not for them but why the disrespectful term for something as beautiful as pregnancy/giving birth/child rearing. Thank goodness your Momma decided to be a breeder,eh? o_O

    And it only came off negative because you took it that way. Poster of the above was just saying as it is. Instead of saying having kids, they said breeding. Same thing and I doubt the poster of that comment was being mean or disrespectful
  • Beezil
    Beezil Posts: 1,677 Member
    I'm working really hard to get fit. By the time I get married and start thinking about having kids I will have gotten my goal body. So after all that work, I can't help but think how bad it would suck to have a baby and gain it all back plus some.

    I also can't fathom how women allow this to happen. I'm thoroughly grossed out by the thought of conception, carriage, and birth of a child. Then, after all of that sacrifice and pain, you have to be chained to it 24/7 and never truly be independent again. I can't imagine anything worse. But then... I Google before/after pics of women's stomachs and I become truly terrified. I know that a lot of women can "recover" from the damage, but many are not fortunate enough despite their best efforts. If vanity were my only issue, I'd probably be able to overcome it. I have much bigger issues (obviously) than that, though. No kids for me. If you don't want kids either, regardless of your reason(s), there's nothing wrong with that.

    You're a brave girl for posting this. lol.

    And this is the exact kind of thing that pro-lifers are going to rip to shreds and condemn someone for. I, however, felt the exact same way, and quite honestly still do. I don't want to have another child, at least not right now. When I'm older, though, I think I might like to adopt a little girl. :) Still on the fence, though... kinda looking forward to having freedom again once my son moves out of the house... lol I guess I'm evil now too.
  • MeIShouldB
    MeIShouldB Posts: 578 Member
    Get a dog or cat instead.

    LOL I have 2 huge dogs and 2 kittens
  • evdjohnson
    evdjohnson Posts: 25
    I'm working really hard to get fit. By the time I get married and start thinking about having kids I will have gotten my goal body. So after all that work, I can't help but think how bad it would suck to have a baby and gain it all back plus some.


    Just try really hard not to have a free for all on food when you are preggo and stay active. We all have those crazy pregnant lady cravings but keep it in check! If you stay active throughout your pregnancy that REALLY helps in bouncing back after baby. Also, if you breast feed that will literally suck out tons and tons of calories!
  • Kholz90
    Kholz90 Posts: 6
    I got married March 12, 2011
    At age 20.
    Gave birth to my first baby girl, March 24, 2012.
    At age 21
    I was 150 before pregnancy, gained 54 pounds.
    I'm currently 180 and working hard to lose my weight.
    And, come August/September we are going to try to conceive again.
    I can't wait to be skinny!! But i also know how hard i worked to lose this weight and i'm going to do my best to not gain as much, that way it's easier to lose next time.
    With my pregnancy i ate and ate and ate some more. Lots and lots of fast food and junk food. Didn't exercise, didn't drink water, and was hardly active at all. I just sat on my butt all day once i got home from work so the weight piled on.

    I'm going to eat healthy, and exercise as much as i can.
    Getting pregnant isn't a bad thing if you do it the right way.
    And you will lose that weight if you try. It took me a year before it finally hit me that i want to lose the weight. And so far i've lost 15 pounds in a month.

    Don't let weight hold you back from making a new life.
    Having a baby is a wonderful thing, i LOVE being a mommy! And i can't wait until i get pregnant again.
  • Trechechus
    Trechechus Posts: 2,819 Member
    Get a dog or cat instead.

    LOL I have 2 huge dogs and 2 kittens

    Awesome. Animals are then best! :)
  • Adw7677
    Adw7677 Posts: 201 Member
    Get a dog or cat instead.

    This is excellent advice. Kids aren't a requirement. People seem to pump them out all the time without really thinking about it. Do you really WANT kids, or are you just expected to have them? The world is overpopulated already. There are plenty of animals that need a good home.

    If you do have a kid, don't follow the advice of a nutritionist. I was 16 when I got pregnant, did everything I was told to do by the nutritionist because I didn't want to make any mistakes, and I gained 65 pounds. The next 2 pregnancies I didn't see a nutritionist, only ate what I wanted when I felt like it, and gained 10 pounds. Healthy babies every time.
  • MeIShouldB
    MeIShouldB Posts: 578 Member
    People work out while pregnant. As long as the doctor Ok's it, there is no reason to think you are going to totally fall apart.

    That's the nicest thing I have to say, just keeping it real.

    I probably won't be allowed to. I would be a high risk pregnancy. Hydrocephalus with 2 shunts. www.hydroassoc.org
  • ArroganceInStep
    ArroganceInStep Posts: 6,239 Member
    I award you no points, and may God have mercy on your soul.


    If you don't want kids, don't have any, there are enough people on the planet as it is.
  • 2FatToRun
    2FatToRun Posts: 810 Member
    Adopt there is already enough children that need a good healthy mommy
  • MeIShouldB
    MeIShouldB Posts: 578 Member
    lomxGLD.gif
    That being said, i wholeheartedly support your decision not to have babies.

    I haven't decided not to have babies.
  • blmurphy37
    blmurphy37 Posts: 55 Member
    i felt the same when i found out i was pregnant! i ate tons when i was pregnant and only gained 20 maybe 25 lbs and i had her on her due date, within 2 weeks after i had lost 30 lbs, between having diaretics for extra water bloating/weight and breast feeding! my stomach was basically flat. all i did was use the wii fit for biggest loser inside my house about an hour 2 maybe 3 times a week! i didnt count calories or anything. im not a big fast food person so that helped but breastfeeding helps tons even for the first couple weeks if that all you can do! Its soooo totally worth it though even if you gain some vs. not having a beautiful baby!

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