Ugly skinny or pretty chubby?

I notice personality first, face second, body third. Personality has to be amazing, face pleasing, body just good enough (not too picky there and I like variety anyway). I also think questions like this are silly. As if it can only be one or the other. Or as if these are the only two options.

I don't like when people say that they notice personality first.

You have no idea what their personality is like from across the room.

Agreed. I mean, really?? Is it even possible to notice personality first?

Maybe she had a big personality?

I knew people were going to have a problem with this. Really? You don't notice how someone behaves and talks and what they talk about? That isn't the thing that catches your interest and wanting to spend more time with them?

I don't see someone's personality from across the room and then go see how they look....
Edited because what I said first didn't make any sense

Women are mostly responding to this thread. Wondering why many guys aren't posting. Could it be because this is a question that you can't answer? Pretty/chubby vs. ugly/thin... causing a short circuit in the brain?

Side note - kudos the the gentlemen who have answered here. Input appreciated.

Can't say how the hubby would answer but he seems to like his chubby wife who looks like a devilish dachshund - stubborn, loyal, cuddly with a tendency towards occasional gluttony.

OP why didn't you just say both have equally lovely personalities? We could have avoided most of this.

A nice body will get my attention, but a beautiful soul will keep me. But If I gag when I look at your face, I'm sorry we can't even be friends.

So, why are we friends? :laugh:

Hush you hot! WOULD BANG! Wanna Bang?

OP why didn't you just say both have equally lovely personalities? We could have avoided most of this.

because my question was based purely on looks alone, everyone else drug personality into it.

And for some reason they think it's an argument.

How about healthy and nice?

^^^^ maybe its because I am in my 30's or maybe its because I have dated too many losers... I would rather someone who is healthy and kind and has their crap together over anything else. I am trying to be that person right now.


A good credit score is a plus too!

Must have a solid 401k too.

Yep...personality all the way...

I remember when I met my wife. We use to both dance in the same club. I sat on one side of a very long bar, and she was always across from me on the other side.

I remember saying to myself..."Man, her personality is fabulous". It took alot of time, but after a month or so I got the courage to go over and ask her personality to dance. She agreed...I could tell she thought my personality was awesome too. We began talking, and found out we a fair amount in common and actually liked each other...looking past our personalities of course.

That was 17+ years ago. Go figure!

My opinion is this:
An 'attractive' person can have an ugly personality, thus making them ugly. An 'ugly' person can have a wonderful personality, making them attractive. I put these terms in '..' because I believe the terms 'attractive' and 'ugly' are relative. I don't believe looks should matter as much as they do in this society. I personally like my guys a little big, just what I like. Some men may like their women a little big. There's no right or wrong with this kind of stuff, we are all god's creation.

Agree...also need a personality to go with looks though. I don't care how good they look it they don't have a good personality lol

Exactly. Looks don't matter.

I slightly disagree with what you say here. I am nowhere near shallow but I think you have to fancy your gal or fella a little to have sex (maybe it's just me). I'm just being honest. But personality is defo the biggest turn on anyway. I'm not saying they have to look this way or that way, not at all just think it matters a teeny tiny bit, maybe in the initial stages. i also think humour is a great turn on too!!!!!

I never could have anticipated that what I said would come across so controversial. I did not say that looks were unimportant. I think they are very important. The question is which would you rather date. I said personality was most important, face was second and body was third. But, all of those are important. I want an amazing person, a pleasing face, and a good enough body (I am not so picky there). So maybe that is pretty chubby then (although my husband was nowhere near chubby). But, I never said an ugly face and an ugly body. I did not say that. Maybe this question was not intended for married people. Or maybe people need to chill out and realize we interpreted the question differently. Has it ever occurred to you that personality influences more than you realize.

But, while it was my husband saying "Who wants to go white river rafting" that caught my attention. If he had been ugly maybe he would not have kept my attention.

I never could have anticipated that what I said would come across so controversial. I did not say that looks were unimportant. I think they are very important. The question is which would you rather date. I said personality was most important, face was second and body was third. But, all of those are important. I want an amazing person, a pleasing face, and a good enough body (I am not so picky there). So maybe that is pretty chubby then (although my husband was nowhere near chubby). But, I never said an ugly face and an ugly body. I did not say that. Maybe this question was not intended for married people.

Lots of others said personality too.

This is for the guys, but ladies feel free to chime in..

Would you rather date someone who had a smoking body but not so hot face or a pretty face and a not so hot body?

See the question said: Who would you rather date?

It didn't say: What is the first thing you notice across the room?

If it had been the second then I would have answered that. And why does everyone assume you only notice people across a room? Everyone looks like blurry blobs across the room.

I never could have anticipated that what I said would come across so controversial. I did not say that looks were unimportant. I think they are very important. The question is which would you rather date. I said personality was most important, face was second and body was third. But, all of those are important. I want an amazing person, a pleasing face, and a good enough body (I am not so picky there). So maybe that is pretty chubby then (although my husband was nowhere near chubby). But, I never said an ugly face and an ugly body. I did not say that. Maybe this question was not intended for married people.

Lots of others said personality too.

I know, but mine was quoted by a whole bunch of people claiming not to believe me.

Eh, am just saying you're perspective is clearly shared by others.

Oh, I see.

Agree...also need a personality to go with looks though. I don't care how good they look it they don't have a good personality lol

Exactly. Looks don't matter.

Of course looks matter, why kids ourselves.

I like your way of thinking. Looks certainly do matter. But as I said, it's just a matter of which one matters more. To some people looks matter more than personality, while to others it's the other way around. But realistically let's face it, the first thing we notice about person is how they look. From there it's just a question of whether you can look past their physical appearance and focus on their personality once the ice is broken. Some are able to while some, for whatever reason cannot.

I'll be the first to say that the first thing I notice when I meet a woman is her looks. From there, personality takes centre stage. If after her looks get my attention she turns out to be a total b****, I don't care how hot she is, she can take a hike.