Why do girls get jealous?

This is why I have very limited female friends.

I can't handle all of the *****iness and jealousy. Who cares what other girls look like? Jealousy is pointless, and will often drive people away from you.

Women should just be happy with who they are. Or change themselves into the person they wanna be! Someone will love you for it, so who cares!

It's interesting you say that because I have met many women who claim to not want female friends because of "drama" and "cattiness", but i found they were usually the insecure and judgmental ones. I have met some women who I just did not get along with (just as I don't get along with every male)- that is completely normal for anyone, but I don't find it exceptionally difficult to make connections with women and never understood why some women claimed to have such horrible luck with female friendships, specifically. I think when you generalize and imply that most women are jealous and *****y,, you just set yourself up missing out on some great friendships. :flowerforyou:

This is why I have very limited female friends.

I can't handle all of the *****iness and jealousy. Who cares what other girls look like? Jealousy is pointless, and will often drive people away from you.

Women should just be happy with who they are. Or change themselves into the person they wanna be! Someone will love you for it, so who cares!

It's interesting you say that because I have met many women who claim to not want female friends because of "drama" and "cattiness", but i found they were usually the insecure and judgmental ones. I have met some women who I just did not get along with (just as I don't get along with every male)- that is completely normal for anyone, but I don't find it exceptionally difficult to make connections with women and never understood why some women claimed to have such horrible luck with female friendships, specifically. I think when you generalize and imply that most women are jealous and *****y,, you just set yourself up missing out on some great friendships. :flowerforyou:

I like you.

Trust me, in my area, almost all of the woman are horrendously superficial, fake barbies who just want to take each other down.
Ask any Sydney sider about the Eastern Suburbs. They will back me up.

But like I said, I do have some wonderful female friends who aren't like that. I always meet women with an open mind, but 9/10 times if they're from the East, they're not really your friend!

Because they mirin'.

Why does jealousy exist?

Evolutionary behavioral adaptation to try to keep the hunter that provides all your protein near you and away from other hungry females. It better ensures the survival of the progeny you have with that particular male.

Just my guess.

TRUTH! Primal instinct for us is to survive and pass on our genes. The healthier and more "attractive" a mate is, chances are the offspring will also carry both sets of genes down and continue the legacy.

A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 28+ years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition

To build on this and take the chance of seeming misogynistic:

Women tend to be more jealous among the sexes because men can drop seed and flee. A woman has the far more taxing task of bearing and caring for the offspring. A female and her offspring would be more successful if she could keep the male close and encouraged him to remain with her. Fending off other females (evolutionary jealousy) and providing that particular male with easy access to sex (not just for procreation) helped to ensure this.

This is of course just theory but I find the ideas behind it fascinating.

I studied evolutionary biology also and it's not misogynistic to discuss those concepts. But, I always remember learning that actually females would group together to help each other with the babies. It was men that had jealousy because they needed to keep other men away from their women because another man could impregnate her and he would never know and would raise another man's baby as his own child. Wasting his resources on some other man's propagation of his genes.

you're all correct and the two explanations are not mutually exclusive

men cooperatively hunted to get protein and fat for the tribe. women gathered other foods, which would include some sources of protein (e.g. insects, birds eggs etc) but mainly carbs and micronutrient rich foods. Each relied on the other - as a community more than as specific individuals, i.e. the idea of one man hunting meat for one woman is not strictly correct, although it may be true for small animals like rabbits and squirrels. bigger animals were hunted by a group of men together then shared with the whole tribe, and larger animals also usually provided more fat (you can't live off of rabbits or squirrels as they don't provide enough fat).......... at the same time men relied on the carbohydrates from gathered food, because hunting did not always succeed and they also needed carbs in their system to be successful at hunting. Food would generally have been shared through the whole tribe, though individual food sharing between couples would have happened as well.

Anyway, back to jealousy and affairs........... men tend to be more jealous of sexual infidelity, because it's very bad from an evolutionary point of view to be cuckolded, however there's a big advantage to being the one whose baby is being raised by another man, which is why cuckoldry has remained and not been removed by natural selection. This is confounded somewhat in a tribal society, in that many modern hunter-gatherer tribes have a collective view of paternity (and you'd expect this to be the case, or even more so, in palaeolithic hunter-gatherer tribes, who may not have even understood the concept of paternity), i.e. all the men in the tribe collectively contribute to the tribe's children, so such jealousies are actually rarer than you'd think (though fights to the death over women do happen in modern hunter-gatherer tribes on occasion) because if you're helping to raise the child of another man in the tribe, then he's also helping to raise your child.... this kind of jealousy became more common after the development of agriculture because planting crops leads to the concept of individual ownership of property, and that leads to the concept of inheritance of property, and then that means it's a lot more important to ensure your kids really are your kids, as opposed to someone else's in the same tribe, whether or not he's raising your child, because the property and cultural knowledge is no longer collectively owned, it's individually owned

on the other hand, women tend to be more jealous of emotional affairs, because what she wants from a man (whether or not he's the father of her children) is someone to provide her with protein and fat, which she needs in large quantities while pregnant or breastfeeding, so she needs that investment either from an individual man or from the men of the tribe collectively. It's probably the case that palaeolithic women would have been more upset if a male partner shared food with another woman than if he had casual sex with her, although she would probably not look kindly on the other either, as sex could be the start of a loving relationship that would involve food sharing, which would ultimately result in her getting fewer resources.

Men would have relied on women as well from an emotional point of view, for example he needs the carbohydrates and micronutrients from food gathered by women, and also it's been know that humans have looked after sick and injured members of the tribe, and evidence for this behaviour goes back nearly 2 million years, so if a man in injured while hunting, it may have been his female partner who looked after him, so he is also dependent on emotional investment from women, so you'd expect some jealousy from men of emotional affairs too.... just less so than sexual infidelity, because this could mean that the child of his woman who he loves and shares his food with isn't actually his. But emotional attachment, food sharing, looking after each other when sick, etc, are all very important to human societies and the importance of this is often underestimated in relation to the importance of providing women with meat to sustain pregnancy and breastfeeding, and the importance of men ensuring that the kids they provide for are really their kids.

I think a lot of guys are worse...sorry fellas lol

Evolutionary theory states that men are to spread their seed to as many women as possible to keep a strong blood line going. Women are to be fertile and produce as many babies from said seed as possible.

I'm jealous when my boyfriend spends time with other girls IF I don't know them because I don't instantly trust people. What's mine is mine and I worked for it.

I'm not a very jealous person. I don't have much want, or any desire to keep up with the "Jones" per say, and my husband keeps me pretty satisfied. I just get a bit territorial when other women throw themselves over my husband in front of me, but I think that's understandable.

For example, my husband was getting a hair cut, and the woman cutting his hair literally ran her fingers through his hair for 30 mins, and kept blatantly hitting on him ....To the point the other hair dressers were talking about it (as it was pretty distasteful...especially considering I was right there getting my hair cut which ironically took a lot less time.)

Finally, I got annoyed enough to literally tell her to be quiet and cut his hair (exact words were "Shut up and cut his hair sweetheart, he's way too polite to tell you to do so.") It was a bit catty of me, but she was really laying it on thick , and it's true, my husband is way to nice to tell someone to cram it.

We both got a big kick out of it though after everything was said and done. He actually said thank you because she was driving him crazy because she wouldn't shut up and he wanted to get home to play video games with me lol.

Evolutionary theory states that men are to spread their seed to as many women as possible to keep a strong blood line going. Women are to be fertile and produce as many babies from said seed as possible.

I'm jealous when my boyfriend spends time with other girls IF I don't know them because I don't instantly trust people. What's mine is mine and I worked for it.

Evolutionarily men are more jealous/possessive because they need to prevent other men from impregnating their female partner, leaving him to raise and waste resources on some other man propagating his genes (this is the most basic fact of evolutionary biology). Women that expend such an incredible amount of resources to have a few successful babies and run the risk of losing their male partner, form female alliances in which they bond together as an extended family, helping each other to raise the babies safely and being there for each other (the bonds and need to nurture the young is so strong that they will continue to raise another woman's baby, even if that mother dies). Because of the strong alliances they don't need to be jealous because of the bond they form preventing females from double crossing each other (they find their own male partners and don't choose one that is untrustworthy and already occupied with a family that they are already aware of).

Why does jealousy exist?

Evolutionary behavioral adaptation to try to keep the hunter that provides all your protein near you and away from other hungry females. It better ensures the survival of the progeny you have with that particular male.

Just my guess.

TRUTH! Primal instinct for us is to survive and pass on our genes. The healthier and more "attractive" a mate is, chances are the offspring will also carry both sets of genes down and continue the legacy.

A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 28+ years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition

To build on this and take the chance of seeming misogynistic:

Women tend to be more jealous among the sexes because men can drop seed and flee. A woman has the far more taxing task of bearing and caring for the offspring. A female and her offspring would be more successful if she could keep the male close and encouraged him to remain with her. Fending off other females (evolutionary jealousy) and providing that particular male with easy access to sex (not just for procreation) helped to ensure this.

This is of course just theory but I find the ideas behind it fascinating.

I studied evolutionary biology also and it's not misogynistic to discuss those concepts. But, I always remember learning that actually females would group together to help each other with the babies. It was men that had jealousy because they needed to keep other men away from their women because another man could impregnate her and he would never know and would raise another man's baby as his own child. Wasting his resources on some other man's propagation of his genes.

you're all correct and the two explanations are not mutually exclusive

men cooperatively hunted to get protein and fat for the tribe. women gathered other foods, which would include some sources of protein (e.g. insects, birds eggs etc) but mainly carbs and micronutrient rich foods. Each relied on the other - as a community more than as specific individuals, i.e. the idea of one man hunting meat for one woman is not strictly correct, although it may be true for small animals like rabbits and squirrels. bigger animals were hunted by a group of men together then shared with the whole tribe, and larger animals also usually provided more fat (you can't live off of rabbits or squirrels as they don't provide enough fat).......... at the same time men relied on the carbohydrates from gathered food, because hunting did not always succeed and they also needed carbs in their system to be successful at hunting. Food would generally have been shared through the whole tribe, though individual food sharing between couples would have happened as well.

Anyway, back to jealousy and affairs........... men tend to be more jealous of sexual infidelity, because it's very bad from an evolutionary point of view to be cuckolded, however there's a big advantage to being the one whose baby is being raised by another man, which is why cuckoldry has remained and not been removed by natural selection. This is confounded somewhat in a tribal society, in that many modern hunter-gatherer tribes have a collective view of paternity (and you'd expect this to be the case, or even more so, in palaeolithic hunter-gatherer tribes, who may not have even understood the concept of paternity), i.e. all the men in the tribe collectively contribute to the tribe's children, so such jealousies are actually rarer than you'd think (though fights to the death over women do happen in modern hunter-gatherer tribes on occasion) because if you're helping to raise the child of another man in the tribe, then he's also helping to raise your child.... this kind of jealousy became more common after the development of agriculture because planting crops leads to the concept of individual ownership of property, and that leads to the concept of inheritance of property, and then that means it's a lot more important to ensure your kids really are your kids, as opposed to someone else's in the same tribe, whether or not he's raising your child, because the property and cultural knowledge is no longer collectively owned, it's individually owned

on the other hand, women tend to be more jealous of emotional affairs, because what she wants from a man (whether or not he's the father of her children) is someone to provide her with protein and fat, which she needs in large quantities while pregnant or breastfeeding, so she needs that investment either from an individual man or from the men of the tribe collectively. It's probably the case that palaeolithic women would have been more upset if a male partner shared food with another woman than if he had casual sex with her, although she would probably not look kindly on the other either, as sex could be the start of a loving relationship that would involve food sharing, which would ultimately result in her getting fewer resources.

Men would have relied on women as well from an emotional point of view, for example he needs the carbohydrates and micronutrients from food gathered by women, and also it's been know that humans have looked after sick and injured members of the tribe, and evidence for this behaviour goes back nearly 2 million years, so if a man in injured while hunting, it may have been his female partner who looked after him, so he is also dependent on emotional investment from women, so you'd expect some jealousy from men of emotional affairs too.... just less so than sexual infidelity, because this could mean that the child of his woman who he loves and shares his food with isn't actually his. But emotional attachment, food sharing, looking after each other when sick, etc, are all very important to human societies and the importance of this is often underestimated in relation to the importance of providing women with meat to sustain pregnancy and breastfeeding, and the importance of men ensuring that the kids they provide for are really their kids.

:flowerforyou:

With other people...I'm way too oblivious to them for a whole bunch of jealousy to be happening . You kind of have to know what they have to want it LOL. I think a lot of the reason jealousy exists is people tend to look at the external when the focus should probably be more inward. I've always been baffled by how much people notice about other people (i.e the shopping cart discussion a few weeks back). I think this "what do you have in comparison to what I have" coupled with insecurity are some of the reasons for jealousy among both women and men. If you're secure inside, it's a lot harder to feel envy, fear of loss or the need to prove superiority.

As far as in my relationship...just no. I'm confident in what we've built. I'm sure he looks around at the other grass but I doubt he'd cross the fence and I don't really think about the possibility. So for me, my own awesomeness is sufficient to quell the notion I guess hubby has some awesomeness that helps this out too. I trust him as much as I love him...with a miracle like that happening, I just can't fathom getting jealous of some random woman he might notice or vice versa.

Lastly, I'm pretty sure jealousy is not a bad emotion (depending on how you deal) and most people have it at one time or another.

Women are cray! I blame hormones!

I prefer guy friends over girlfriends for that reason.
I am a tomboy at heart and all the cattiness it too much for me.

And jealousy? I have never experienced it myself personally.

I hate sentiments like this. You REALLY can't find any other women like you? Out of billions you are the only non-hormonal one? Really?

I work in a science and math heavy, male dominated industry. I'm a tom boy. I like to camp, fish, hike, bike, play contact sports, lift weights, etc. I don't wear makeup often, and am most comfortable in T-shirts and jeans.. I seriously never had PMS until after the birth of my 3rd kid (and I can tell I have it now, and didn't then). I have plenty of women friends. I work with them, ride bikes with a women's club, played women's rugby, etc.

Seriously. There are a lot of women in the world. To eliminate them all as friends is doing a terrible disservice to yourself.

I guess it has all been said. Both men and women get jealous for the same reasons, women just express their feelings better than men Therefore we THINK women are jealous moreso than men.