Getting too carried away with the weight loss?

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Replies

  • mockchoc
    mockchoc Posts: 6,573 Member
    How many calories are you on? I don't think you said yet?
  • Karleh
    Karleh Posts: 45 Member
    It does sound like those comments might be coming from a jealous standpoint, but is there anything else that could be triggering them? The fact that you now say you think you look great (and you do) is a good sign to me, as it suggests you've got a good self image. Are you conveying this sense to them too? A warning sign to me would be if you said you had a way to go yet, or that to maintain this weight you are behaving in an unhealthy and extreme way. Are you communicating to people that you feel really happy and healthy, or are they hearing you just talk in negatives, about how much you 'shouldn't' have eaten, or how much you still have to lose? If it's the latter, then caring people might express concern or cajole you into recognising your behaviour. But if they are just making negative comments even when you have stated (and more the point *shown* through your behaviour that you are happy now, then it might be a case of finding new friends and building relationships with people who will suport you fully. Good luck!

    Hmm good point I suppose I can come across as excessive.. I still meticulously log everything on MFP and whilst it is set to maintain if I go over I will cycle. I don't bother logging if I am having a night out or hungover eating the following day but I guess I do express concern and regret over going over my allowance. I suppose that can make people think I am trying to lose more instead of just stay the same.

    Alot of the time I talk about food though is with people saying to me "OMG your eating something decent" and then me getting angry and pointing out how i always eat loads I just burn it off.
  • wibbley74
    wibbley74 Posts: 80 Member
    you look fantastic and know you want to maintain so keep it up
  • Karleh
    Karleh Posts: 45 Member
    How many calories are you on? I don't think you said yet?

    MFP is set to 2150, I have about 2500 on most days but will then do a 30 min cycle to even it out.
  • Ophidion
    Ophidion Posts: 2,065 Member
    oh I forgot to say...If skins is still being made maybe go for a part on it.
  • nikilis
    nikilis Posts: 2,305 Member
    How many calories are you on? I don't think you said yet?

    MFP is set to 2150, I have about 2500 on most days but will then do a 30 min cycle to even it out.

    dude. I hate you right now.
  • nikilis
    nikilis Posts: 2,305 Member
    oh I forgot to say...If skins is still being made maybe go for a part on it.

    hahahaha. on point my brother.
  • invisibubble
    invisibubble Posts: 662 Member
    I think perhaps it's the contrast which is taking people aback a bit. Seeing your before and after, you look really hella thin in comparison. Seeing you just as you are now, I would think you are naturally one of those wiry guys like Steve Tyler, but if I'd known you were big before, yeah, I'd probably be a bit concerned, to be honest.
    Give them time. They need to get used to you. If they don't stop, then forget them and move on. As long as you're happy and healthy. And as you say, you're not looking to lose any more.
  • sarahmoo12
    sarahmoo12 Posts: 756 Member
    You have lost a lot of weight but I think you look fine!!
    If you want to put on weight to make YOURSELF happy why not just build up muscle with strength training?? Dont do it to make any1 else happy but yourself though, if you are happy how you look and like you said your in a healthy range stay there !
  • Karleh
    Karleh Posts: 45 Member
    oh I forgot to say...If skins is still being made maybe go for a part on it.

    hahahaha. on point my brother.
    Someone else said this to me the other day in person, I think I am a bit too old :P i'm 25 :(
  • GrabacrPD
    GrabacrPD Posts: 94 Member
    Looking good, I think peoples perception of a healthy weight have been skewed where someone overweight in most eyes can be seen as healthy/slim. Throw facts at them like BMI, Waist-to-Height Ratio and educate them to what you've done is extend your life!
  • Fairlieboy
    Fairlieboy Posts: 84 Member
    Doing great! I am the same weight now that I was at 25! (I'm now 60) Went from BMI of 24.9 to 22, which is midrange. Got the same comments as you. I reckon it is because 65% of the population (Australia) is either over weight or obese. So only 35% is normal or underweight. So get used to being different!
  • bpotts44
    bpotts44 Posts: 1,066 Member
    You have a cyclist's body, but I wouldn't try to cut anymore.
  • PrimalGirl
    PrimalGirl Posts: 148 Member
    Ahhh, cycling. Just tell them you're going for the Bradley Wiggins look, with all its associated endurance, cardiovascular benefits and insane oxygen intake.

    Then cycle off in a righteous rage.
  • geebusuk
    geebusuk Posts: 3,348 Member
    So many times people answer with 'jealousy' etc - but in this sort of case I think it's just because people get used to seeing how you look when bigger.

    I've had similar - when I got to my thinnest and still had a bit of flab, people were saying I looked "too thin" and "ill" (to be fair I do have a big frame) - I'd bet if they'd first met me at that weight they wouldn't have thought "oh, he's skinny".

    You look fine as far as a fairly thin/skinny person goes.
    For me, I want more muscle - but as mentioned, I've got a naturally large frame and probably watched too many Arnie action films when growing up so no doubt have a messed up body-image :P.
  • fortheuniform
    fortheuniform Posts: 4 Member
    Respect Bro! you have done an amazing transformation, its truly inspiring. Don't bother with what people have to say asnlong as you are happy with the new you.

    My target weight is also 64kg, what's your height?
  • Flab2fitfi
    Flab2fitfi Posts: 1,349 Member
    Well done on the weight loss and you look fine - you can even see muscle in one pic. You also seem to have a healthy relationship with food and fitness.

    I think there are two reasons why people comment. A You have lost a lot quite quickly and people are still getting used to the new you and B others are jealous that you have succeeded where they have failed.
  • learnerdriver
    learnerdriver Posts: 298 Member
    gosh, you look like my husband's build- you look like a runner.
  • Lysander666
    Lysander666 Posts: 275 Member
    I used to be in the same situation as you. I went from 14 stone to 10 stone and loads of people said I was too thin. It's for two reasons:

    They're not used to seeing you like that.
    They don't know what healthy BMI 'looks' like.

    Some might be because of jealousy but mostly it's because of the above.

    Just stick with it and don't go out of your healthy range.
  • Karleh
    Karleh Posts: 45 Member
    Well done on the weight loss and you look fine - you can even see muscle in one pic. You also seem to have a healthy relationship with food and fitness.

    I think there are two reasons why people comment. A You have lost a lot quite quickly and people are still getting used to the new you and B others are jealous that you have succeeded where they have failed.

    Haha muscle! I don't have the dedication to build it up :(, I enjoy cycling and more cardio I just get bored trying to do weights. Plus I have a manual job and have to log 16kg crates about all day, that is the closest thing to weight training I will do :P
  • juliegrey1
    juliegrey1 Posts: 202 Member
    wow well done! As so many have said once you are in the right BMI for your height and you are eating properly and you are in a healthy weight range then people will get used to seeing you as you are.I can understand society is preoccupied by weight whether its too much or too little,and it is so easy for people to get worried when they see a huge change,health and strength are the most important here once you have both of those then you are fine!
  • EdTheGinge
    EdTheGinge Posts: 1,616 Member
    Manly towel there chief.

    It's going to happen, people get so used to the bigger you that it take a bit of time to adjust to the new you. Can I see where they're coming from ? Yes, but at the end of the day you're the only one that has to be happy. I've had the same comments and as annoying as they are you just have to ignore it.

    I went from 101kg to 68kg, took me 4.5months. Got negative comments and the old 'you won't keep it off'.
  • lostsanity137
    lostsanity137 Posts: 298 Member
    I think you look fine! I don't see any rib cage, and you don't have "scrawny" arms in the shirtless picture. You look healthy. Of course, if you want some improvement that they will be super jealous of then start weight lifting and build some nice muscle. If you get bored with weights I suggest you try a very simple program like Stronglifts 5X5. Do whatever makes you happiest in the end though. :)
  • Tiffa0909
    Tiffa0909 Posts: 191 Member
    You look great , I think they are still trying to adjust to your new weight.
  • myofibril
    myofibril Posts: 4,500 Member
    You look fine to me.

    Perhaps it's because you live in Manchester and don't look like you've been Tangoed that all the haters are coming out of the woodwork?
  • mockchoc
    mockchoc Posts: 6,573 Member
    How many calories are you on? I don't think you said yet?

    MFP is set to 2150, I have about 2500 on most days but will then do a 30 min cycle to even it out.

    Well that is not low but for a regular woman not dieting and I'm not saying for everyone but it's around the 2000 mark isn't it? I would say you are close to what you should be having.. maybe could even up it a bit if you lose anymore. Sorry I only know about women lol although I have guy friends losing on around 2000. Just watch you don't lose more. You know what to do. Keep going! :flowerforyou:
  • chubbybword123
    chubbybword123 Posts: 54 Member
    Hey Karleh, I think you look great but maybe this can help, cos it takes your frame into consideration:

    http://www.freedieting.com/tools/ideal_body_weight.htm
  • bilberryjam
    bilberryjam Posts: 72 Member
    I'm just going to echo what everybody else said - they're used to seeing you bigger and haven't adjusted to this you yet.

    You were chubby cheeked before and now your face is very thin. Some people will look you and think 'wow! great cheekbones!' But it wouldn't surprise me if the people who've known you a long time now think you look gaunt in comparison.

    I also think we've also just got used to overweight being the norm.

    There's this BBC calculator with which you can compare your BMI to the average BMI all around the world.

    http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/health-18781786

    So, for example, I have a BMI of 21 - hardly underweight, but lower than 87% of women in my age group in my country (where the mean BMI for women in my age group is 26.87) So you can see how that might skew perceptions.
  • yksdoris
    yksdoris Posts: 327 Member
    you look just fine!! Its just because so many people are overweight so they are not used to seeing people at a healthy weight and therefore they think you are too thin. Stay confident!

    And don't let your girlfriend tell you that she liked you better obese, that's like saying "I like you better when you were unhealthy and at risk of many diseases and when I felt that you had over-scored when you got together with me!" see that's not nice....

    I have since had a talk with her about it and she has realised how insulting it was, I basically asked her how she would feel if I told her she weighed too much and was unattractive and she seemed genuinely sorry about saying it. Still it is now in my mind about how she is unhappy with how I look which is a bit rubbish.

    I and my bf (now fiancé) started on MFP together; he because he was underweight and always had been and everyone had been telling him "just wait until you hit ... and you'll put on weight" but that never happened. And I because I was much too heavy. Long story short, he gained 10 kg and I lost about 20. Anyways, even though I knew it was good for him and I knew it was healthy for him and all that, it took a little while to get used to his new form. his face changed a little bit, and his hugs felt different. the hardest for me was though when his smell changed a bit, from eating all that extra protein. thankfully that's gone back to normal now! Maybe you can talk to your gf - maybe she's afraid that you're becoming a different person, she's afraid of losing the man she fell in love with? Give her some time and ask her to give your relationship some time to get accustomed to your new shape. As you said, intellectually she understands that you're in a healthy weight range but our emotions and subconscious sometimes don't pay attention to the brain.
  • khall86790
    khall86790 Posts: 1,100 Member
    I've had a few people mention to me they think I am getting carried away and/or taking things too seriously even though I am now at a healthy weight. To be honest, they kind of do have a point.
    I lost 2kgs trying to maintain my current weight because I am so used to the eating habits I've adopted from losing weight and found I was not eating enough calories to maintain the weight I stopped counting calories at. It's a difficult situation because the new habits I've picked up are healthy and good for me, but it does take time I think to get into the habit of eating enough when for a long time you are making sure you don't eat too much.

    Personally, I think you look good now but I wouldn't aim to lose any more weight. I've started weight training now to tone up and get some definition, maybe you should look into the same?
    www.nerdfitness.com < a great place to start!

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