Rude Dude Rant
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I'm really confused. Did he actually say something to you directly or are you telepathic?0
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You know, my husband went to play golf today. When he left the house, he had a horrible angry look on his face, and if you didn't know better, you'd think he'd had a bad argument with me or something. He looked mad! I'm pretty sure he looked that way on the course too and I bet people thought he was a nasty guy. Thing is, he'd just found out a good friend of his had died & had come home from work early. He went to play golf to be with his thoughts.
Looks can be deceiving. Don't be so quick to assume it's about you. And even if it was about you, let it be his problem, not yours.
I agree looks can be decieving (my boyfriend gets that look when nothings wrong too lol) but what about when they are obviously staring, and actually rolling their eyes... MOST people at the gym either don't know you exist, or are even thinking to themselves way to go, but there are a few, at least at my gym, that make it pretty obvious your not welcome on their "side" of the gym... not everyone has good intentions or just naturally has mean looks unfortunately
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Dear lady, who got mad at me today.
I saw as you were walking, that you looked very angrily in my direction. It confused me for a bit because I couldn't figure out why you were judging me. "I don't know." I thought. "Maybe it's because she has something against really buff, muscular and in-shape guys." I checked myself for offensive stains, but no...all clear. It really offended me for a bit, and then I remembered that at that precise moment, I was scowling in disgust.
"I bet that's what it was!" I thought. I felt terrible for judging you and getting offended at what was surely my own misconception. What you don't know, is that I wasn't scowling in disgust at you. As you were walking, in the yard behind you this was happening:
Please accept my apology for being offended at something I thought that you might have been thinking, and also for not being more mindful of every single person in the area before I make a face with no apparent reason. Clearly, neither of us are mind readers.
Sincerely,
Rude Dude
:laugh:0 -
I thought your rant was beautiful and well worded. I am and always have been a big boned chick and I hate that people feel the need to judge me when i am working out but i get satisfaction in their shock at how hard i can push it in the gym
I can pretty much guarantee you that nobody is judging you....this stuff is all in people's heads. We're all way too ****ing busy getting our fitness on to worry about anything else.0 -
So, you're changing your physical appearance, are mad with someone else's physical appearance and attitude problem, so you decide to act...with a similar attitude problem putting down that person and perhaps other people as well.This is to the douche who thought it was okay to scowl at me while I did my 6 mile walk around the lake:
I realize that you are very disciplined and in control, given your extraordinarily large muscles and fabulous physique. However, your orange oompa loompa tan does nothing for you.
I'm so sorry you had to go out walking that day, I'm so sorry you had to get very disappointed that not every chick with a nice face has a perfect body.
And when you scowl at me in disgust because I am a fat *kitten*, remember that I am working hard to change. I was not put on the earth to please you, therefore the fact that you may have had to go home and rinse your eyes out with battery acid after seeing me in my chunky glory, has no bearing whatsoever to my life.
At least that guy didn't say anything.0 -
Don't make it about you....
A. it's not worth it
B. you don't know that
C. you have no idea what is going on in his head.....you just don't..
QFT0 -
I see these posts all the time here .. waah waah waah, someone was judging me .. I know what they were thinking etc etc ...
Here's what you need to understand.. all those bad things you "knew" he was thinking .. They're all actually things you think about yourself. You just assign them to random people so you don't have to own them.0 -
This is to the douche who thought it was okay to scowl at me while I did my 6 mile walk around the lake:
I realize that you are very disciplined and in control, given your extraordinarily large muscles and fabulous physique. However, your orange oompa loompa tan does nothing for you.
I'm so sorry you had to go out walking that day, I'm so sorry you had to get very disappointed that not every chick with a nice face has a perfect body.
And when you scowl at me in disgust because I am a fat *kitten*, remember that I am working hard to change. I was not put on the earth to please you, therefore the fact that you may have had to go home and rinse your eyes out with battery acid after seeing me in my chunky glory, has no bearing whatsoever to my life.
Apparently it does.
:flowerforyou:
^My thoughts exactly.
And also, perhaps he saw you judging his tan and he could tell from your face that you thought he looked like an "oompa loompa" and he didn't like being made fun of? I mean, it is all about perception and this is how you perceived him, right?
Or, more likely, his thoughts weren't on you at all which may be odd if you are used to the world revolving around yourself. I hate running, with a passion, and I'm pretty dang sure that shows on my face everytime I try it. I also like to use my workouts to work out tension and anger, so I'm pretty sure that shows on my face as well. But I don't notice anyone around me half the time, perhaps I need to work on wearing a fake smile so I don't accidentally offend some stranger because my thoughts are focused inward instead of on them?0 -
People usually judge others by there own actions.0
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maybe he just has a case of b*tchy resting face.
Haha! I ALMOST posted a video.....0 -
I see these posts all the time here .. waah waah waah, someone was judging me .. I know what they were thinking etc etc ...
Here's what you need to understand.. all those bad things you "knew" he was thinking .. They're all actually things you think about yourself. You just assign them to random people so you don't have to own them.
Yep.0 -
This is to the douche who thought it was okay to scowl at me while I did my 6 mile walk around the lake:
I realize that you are very disciplined and in control, given your extraordinarily large muscles and fabulous physique. However, your orange oompa loompa tan does nothing for you.
I'm so sorry you had to go out walking that day, I'm so sorry you had to get very disappointed that not every chick with a nice face has a perfect body.
And when you scowl at me in disgust because I am a fat *kitten*, remember that I am working hard to change. I was not put on the earth to please you, therefore the fact that you may have had to go home and rinse your eyes out with battery acid after seeing me in my chunky glory, has no bearing whatsoever to my life.
You're right. I'm sorry. I can be an insensitive *kitten* that way sometimes. I can't help it. Forgive me?0 -
I do not get this thread. How do you know it was your physical appearance? Maybe the guy hates everyone equally?
Either way...great job walking around the lake. If I felt someone was being rude or glaring I would say something. I used to handle this very thing when I grew up in a bad neighborhood in Los Angeles and people get shot daily. Other guys would look at me all hard and I would counter that with something like " Hey Richard how are you doing" knowing this guy was not someone I knew or Richard. Then the guy would look like what in the world? or hey do I know this guy. That would diffuse the situation.0 -
Personally I find it more rude somebody is so self involved they think some random dude is scowling about you.
Get over yourself and realize don't care all that much. You'll enjoy life MUCH MORE that way.
THIS. I never understand why so many people think everyone else's world revolves around them, and especially a complete stranger? Who knows why he was frowning, and who cares?0 -
One day I was walking down the hall at work (evidently with a sour expression on my face) and a coworker said "Smile! It's not that bad!" I replied that I had just received a phone call telling me that my grandfather had passed away, and I was on my way home. Needless to say, she proceeded to apologize profusely.
Another time I lost my temper with my kids at the grocery store and yelled at them, and a bystander proceeded to lecture me on proper child-rearing (the phrase "lay off the caffeine, lady" sticks in my head for some reason.) I had just come from the doctor's office where I found out that I was having a miscarriage as we spoke (went for a routine appointment, had no idea there was a problem at all). It was all I could do not to fall apart completely, much less navigate the store with two kids.
OP, you may well be correct that he was a judgemental SOB and not ashamed of it. In that case, rant away. However, keep in mind that you have no idea what is going on in his life and so to respond with a smile and a wave was probably the best response. Otherwise you might end up eating crow for breakfast.0 -
I KNOW a mad-dog stare, directly in my eyes, that was real, like he wanted me off the planet. I don't read minds, but BODY LANGUAGE tells the truth. I wouldn't have taken it any way if I wasn't absolutely CERTAIN. The upturned lip and everything. No he wasn't trying to look like Billy Idol, it was a genuine look of disgust. I know the look, I didn't mistake it.
One time I thought this girl kept looking at me, smiling...I didn't know who she was...but she was attractive, was looking right at me, and so I smiled back. This happened a few times, then she waved for me to come over...I was very flattered and I almost got up, but then a girl's voice a bit behind me laughed and she got up and ran over and hugged the other girl...and neither of them even noticed I was there...the girl behind me was leaving some friends/family and the girl looking at me was trying to get her to come over. Boy was I glad I didn't get up...
Some people do actually look disgusted all the time, especially when trying to look tough as well.
I actually have been on the receiving end of baloney like this in school with overweight girls with an attitude thinking I was a buff guy laughing at them (I really didn't even remember seeing them, and I dont remember what I was laughing about), then going out of their way to show me attitude and tell me how I thought I was great because I was buff, blah blah, then start BS about me in school, when I hadn't even registered seeing them. I later found out it was all because they thought I was making fun of them when I hadn't even registered seeing the silly girls, very insecure and low of those girls! Of course then they actually were nasty fatties in my mind, but they weren't before.
Most people would be surprised how little random others who seem to be reacting to them are actually thinking of them as they pass...0 -
Maybe some people are just bad at smiling. I'm going to start making random faces at strangers just to see how they react. If I'm lucky, I'll encounter a MFP local who will dedicate a topic to me.0
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maybe he just has a case of b*tchy resting face.
I get this a lot. People think I am scowling, or pissed off all the time. I'm generally not. It's effective with employees though.0 -
I'm lost in my own little world when I work out and tend to look pissed as well. Walking the track one day some chick stopped me to give me hell for judging her called me an ugly b*tch for judging her ect ect when in reality I never even noticed her the times I passed her. I wonder if she ran to some site to post about how horrible I was.0
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Please do not let your own insecurities make you think you can assume what a persons motivations are.0
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