Embarassing Moments with Children

i am kidless and will that way......


as a youngster, maybe 5. was at my grandmothers house as she had her church group over to play cards. i had asked if they wanted to hear any jokes. when they said yes, i proceeded with the following:

whys a fire truck red? if someone was pulling your hose all day youd be red too

whys a pool table green? if someone was racking your balls all night youd be green too

everyone thought gram was to young to have a stroke.....

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was at dinner with my friend and her daughter. since the daughter wouldnt eat i challenged her to a race who could eat their food the fastest. if she won, i would buy her ice cream at dairy queen.

i let her win so ice cream it was. walking back to the car everyones all happy especially the little one when she missteps on a speedbump. down she goes, ice cream and all. she starts crying and in perfect sync with the moments between sobs she farts. loudly. i immediately start laughing as the couple who were sitting outside looked at me like i was the most terrible parent on earth

When my sons were 4 and 1 (now they are 24 and 21) we were in Montgomery Ward and I was trying to find a dress and my oldest was pushing his little brother around in the stroller. He ran into a rack of clothes knocking it over into another rack of clothes and taking it out, too!! I can laugh now, but i was crying that day!! lol

I quoted the wrong thing. Whoops.

My kids are 20, 15 and 13, When my 20 year old was 2, she was learning the names of body parts, and she would tell me "I see your nose/eyes/lips/etc. Mommy" One day we were in the grocery store, she was in the cart and she very loudly exclaimed "I see your boobies Mommy!"

I'm all for teaching children the proper, scientific name of body parts and taking away the silly taboo of one's body, but I'm not too sure I want my kid using my body as their point of reference nor experimenting with it. I think it's kind of inappropriate, especially if there isn't a conversation and explanation about the body and the correct way to act with others. I don't get why parents shower with their kids in the first place, but I know plenty that do. No judgment. Just not my cup of tea

ETA: I have a 2-year-old.

I never planned to bath with my kids either. I didn't have a choice with my 2nd one, she was terrified of the bathtub and ktichen sink from the first time she saw the tub drain. From 6 months old she was convinced all the toys were going to disappear, even though she could see her big sister was just fine. The ONLY way to wash her was for me to shower with her, and to hold her the whole time, and make sure nothing was on the floor of the shower. That lasted about 6 months or so. She still is leery about water deeper than her waist, and she is almost 8 (although she loves to play in water, I can't keep her out of it, go figure). Sometimes parents have to deal with things as best they can, in a way that works for them. :flowerforyou:
That being said, my husband has not been comfortable with being naked around his girls pretty much from the time they started moving on their own, although there have been a few accidental exposure along the way! :blushing:

For parents who's kids haven't gotten there yet, you will get your chance to get them back. When they hit puberty and start to understand what is really going on behind closed doors, and what their favorite songs are REALLY about - well I tell ya, it is SOOOOO much fun to embarass them back! Gotta love payback! :laugh: :laugh:

Yeah, that's what many of my friends say...their kids are afraid/uncooperative or they have limited time & have to bathe together. Thankfully, my daughter lovessss the bath! She loves to get her hair washed, face cleaned all that! lol

I think it's hilarious when parents start embarrassing their kids with sex talk! I remember the first time my mom talked about sex like we were girlfriends (I was like 19) but I was stilllllllllll mortified lol

I had one today.
I came home from running an errand while my brother watched my son and my sons cousins.
As soon as I came home I heard all the kids giggling. Turns out my 8 year old son raided my panty drawer and was showing his cousins my bra and panties and threw them around in the living room....

Ha wait till they find the TOM products.. LOL " Mooommm whats that fooorrr?" My answer. Nunya ask when you are 20

When my son hit about 2 until he was 3 if I was in the bra section of any store he would pat at the bras all while singing loudly

BOOBIES BOOBIES BOOBIES!!!

I have pictures of this, I only wish it were video. That would be soo much better. "-)

My wife and I were out with our 6 year old daughter and 2 1/2 year old son looking at houses with a realtor this weekend. Our son is *almost* fully potty trained, so we've been telling him that, if he needs to go, go into the potty and go. Don't stop to ask, just do it. We're walking around one of the houses, the realtor comes around the corner, and there's my little boy, pecker hanging wide out in the open, peeing in the toilet.

At least it was in the toilet, not on the floor.

This was, of course, a week after, in church he asked to go potty. And on the way back shouted across the sanctuary to me (in the middle of Mass, of course) that "I MADE POOPIE, DADDY!" Thanks, little man. For telling me, and letting everyone know...

About 17 years ago when my friends wee boy was three, I was carrying him in my arms as we walked through the carpark of a department store. An older man who had tried to commit suicide years before with a shotgun to his head walked by us. His last name is Watt. Mostly he is known in our town as "bad shot, what!" I very unthinkingly said to my friend "oh look, there goes bad shot what - and the three year old yelled out at the TOP of his lungs "BAD SHOT WHAT". I was mortified - and learnt my lesson

I was breastfeeding my now 6 month old and of course my 2 year old saw this on a regular basis.I always tell her that the baby is having ba-ba ( our word for food).I had some friends over one day and was wearing one of my v neck shirts when suddenly my daughter comes up to me with her baby doll saying "ba-ba ba-ba" and proceeds to yank down my shirt....nearly exposing me to everybody lol. The other time she really embarassed me was...before I realized how quick she would pick up on things.We had watched a movie with a make out scene...she decided to try to copy it where she would take my head in her hands,stare deeply into my eyes say "I love you" and then swoops in for a big kiss.I thought she had stopped doing that and then my babysitter said that she did it to her 14 year old daughter during her very public ballet class.My babysitter then tells me that it's ok...it must mean that her parents really love each other....so I had to explain with a really red face that she saw it in a movie lol.

My youngest brother had a screaming tantrum fit when he was 4 because my mother wouldn't buy him the leopard-print negligee he found in the clearance section at Ross.
Why did he want it, you ask? "I WANNA BE MICHAEL JACKSON!!!!!" He screamed, over and over.

My kid is exceptional at embarrassing me:

Standing on the train platform in the rain, a young couple walks up with plastic bags on their heads to protect their hair. My son yells loudly to them, "Why do you have garbage hats!?"

At about 1 year old he is in his stroller on the bus with me. A girl walks by in a skirt and he wastes no time at all sliding his hand up her skirt and to her butt. I snatch his hand away and apologize profusely, the girl's boyfriend looks at him and says, "You better watch it little man, she's taken!" Thankfully they had good humor about it.

To the African convenience store owner near our house, (despite the fact that he sees all different people all the time, we live in a diverse city). "Why is his skin brown?" (And we go into yet another talk about people are all different).

In a crowded public bathroom during the potty training process I sit my son on the toilet and bend down to get some tissue. I get peed all over, my son laughing hysterically and yelling, "I'm peeing on you!" while I frantically say, "Point down! Point down!" Everyone in the bathroom was laughing, and everyone in the bathroom was well aware that my wet jeans were wet with pee.

Another public restroom, I had to bring my son in while I took care of business. I had a pantyliner in as precaution because I knew my cycle was going to start soon. My loving son decides to ask me very loudly, "Mommy, why do you have a sticker in your underpants?"

On a bus shortly after my son turned 3. He sees this woman who is easily 600 pounds and the biggest person he has ever seen. She sits with her legs apart and her stomach hanging down and practically touching the floor and announces loudly, "That lady has a big fat belly". I distract him, hoping she didn't hear since she was a decent distance away and for once he wasn't overly loud, and get ready to get off the bus where we will discuss (again) that you shouldn't point out people's differences because sometimes those differences make them upset or sad. To a 3 year old, saying someone has a fat belly and saying someone has long hair is exactly the same thing. The woman heard and before we get off the bus she decides to be a total snot and tells him, "You're a mean little boy, you owe me an apology" he has no idea why he is "mean" which is a bad word to a 3 year old and looks like she just smacked him in the face. As we get off the bus I'm a mixture of furious and embarrassed. My son is not a mean kid, he just noticed a difference and pointed it out not knowing that having a big fat belly was BAD and not just simply another difference in people.

Trying on dresses with my son, who is 5 now. In the dressing room I try on a dress that has promise so I step out to look in the big mirror. He decides to follow me and stand behind me and, just as someone walks in, drums on my butt and says, "This dress makes your butt boingy!" Thanks kid - I found a different dress.

My husband made an offhand comment once about our bathroom smelling like "burnt poop" because of the hair dryer getting hair tangled into it. My son, from that point forward for months, would welcome everyone into our home by informing them that our bathroom smelled like "Burnt poop".

Upon seeing a neighborhood dog that isn't neutered, my son asks me "What are those things hanging down under his butt?" Since we're at a distance and I'm all for truth, I tell him, "Those are his testicles". As the person passes us, my son decides to inform them, "Your dog has huge testicles".

On the bus my son likes to sit in the big tall seats at the back. We get on this bus and he runs to the back and the tall seat next to the window in the back row is taken. Instead of finding another seat he informs the guy, a gigantic bald tattooed looking brute of a man, "You're in my seat". The guy laughed as I shushed him and moved him to another seat thanking my lucky stars that the guy didn't punch my teeth out.

There are tons more, but these are the ones off the top of my head.

Lol, this reminds me of when I was in line at Walmart when my son was maybe 18 months... I glanced down only to realize he had tugged on my shirt and my entire bare breast was out for everyone to see! Oops! And Walmart of all places - where you easily have 60 people around you while you wait in line!

I was breastfeeding my now 6 month old and of course my 2 year old saw this on a regular basis.I always tell her that the baby is having ba-ba ( our word for food).I had some friends over one day and was wearing one of my v neck shirts when suddenly my daughter comes up to me with her baby doll saying "ba-ba ba-ba" and proceeds to yank down my shirt....nearly exposing me to everybody lol. The other time she really embarassed me was...before I realized how quick she would pick up on things.We had watched a movie with a make out scene...she decided to try to copy it where she would take my head in her hands,stare deeply into my eyes say "I love you" and then swoops in for a big kiss.I thought she had stopped doing that and then my babysitter said that she did it to her 14 year old daughter during her very public ballet class.My babysitter then tells me that it's ok...it must mean that her parents really love each other....so I had to explain with a really red face that she saw it in a movie lol.

When I was a kid, I was SUPER independent. When I was about 6, my mom took me to a department store at the mall. While she was shopping, I decided I had to go potty. Being in a department store I'd been in multiple times, I knew where the bathroom was, so she let me go.

Except I confused the emergency exit door for the bathroom door...and set off the entire store's fire alarm. Womp.

When our youngest was about 6 or 8 maybe, we were just leaving one of those big box stores named BJ's and across the street was another shopping center with a sporting goods store we went to quite often. Out of nowhere our youngest son says very loudly "MOM!!! Guess what? D i c k's likes BJ's!!!" Our much older children just busted out laughing hysterically as did may shoppers around us. I tried really hard not to laugh. Of course since everyone laughed about it he thought it must be funny and kept saying it the entire ride home. I kept trying to tell him thats enough in a nice way without having to explain it to him but he kept saying it anyway.