help please

I was only talking in past tense becuase I was trying to explain my side of what was happening when I had him I still love him I love him so much it hurts. And my son is more important then any relationship id get rid of the man before i got rid of my kid. I just made a mistake and im paying for it. I guess I was hoping to get a little support mayb from someone here whos gone thru something similar. but all im getting for the most part is gee your a freaking lying dumba$$ And Im sorry if somehow I gave anyonre that impression. and They have my son home schooled so there is no way to just pick him up from school. Its like the boy is on lock down.

New question...who are "they"? Is his father remarried? Living with mom?

This does sound like an eerie situation. I would like to suggest you wait until you are feeling better. I have a feeling you waited until something made you brave enough to post and that same something may be making it hard to spell. I can understand feeling distraught over this, but I also can understand if you were misled and then either someone had a plan to do this to you, or later took advantage of realizing they had an advantage. Go take a breather, a nap, eat something and drink a whole lot of water. When you wake up consider asking these questions again, or maybe a better idea will come to you like where you can turn for some serious help. Only you know if he justifiably has custody of him or just took him for an extended time under the guise of "vacation" and then portrayed it as abandonment or something else to the courts to gain custody. Only you know how many fathers are involved, if you have the capacity to care for both these kids and how to win your son's favor back. I can see in a year a kid that young could get brainwashed against you. I saw a guy and his mother tell his kids horrible things about their mother anytime their plans to see her fell through. Only they knew the meeting place and whether they went to it or not, not the kids nor I. The fact that they always made sure the kids were told that she was "off partying" or "flaked out again" made me initially suspicious they were the culprits and a few months later I discovered they were. It can happen. I've seen it. IF that's the case with you....you can NOT let it drive you crazy. Must not. You must take care of yourself until the right answers become obvious so that you are ready to strike when the opportunity comes to get control of the situation. Make sure you have the kind of life that any adult would feel comfortable putting a child in. Right now, you are not coming off that way, but that does not mean you might not be in a desperate or distraught state emotionally right at this minute and cannot change things. Fast.

I was only talking in past tense becuase I was trying to explain my side of what was happening when I had him I still love him I love him so much it hurts. And my son is more important then any relationship id get rid of the man before i got rid of my kid. I just made a mistake and im paying for it. I guess I was hoping to get a little support mayb from someone here whos gone thru something similar. but all im getting for the most part is gee your a freaking lying dumba$$ And Im sorry if somehow I gave anyonre that impression. and They have my son home schooled so there is no way to just pick him up from school. Its like the boy is on lock down.

the reason people are thinking theres more to the story is because there HAS to be.
you simply cannot come on here, say your ex took your kid a year ago and wont give him back, and expect nothing but support.
you are coming off like an absolute lunatic.

let me see if im up to speed...

you had a child with someone you were in a relationship X number of years ago. you 2 broke up, and neither did anything as far as custody/obligations.
then at some point in 2012 (summer?) you let your child go visit his father for the summer with the understanding (verbal?) that the child would be returned in august.
at some point during this time, "they" started calling you demanding you drop the child support and getting nasty. it was then that you called the police. cops called him to find out wtf is up and he says hes bringing the kid back. he doesnt. the next event is that the father is going to file for full custody. you filed your own plan in dispute and arent getting much response.

when you tried thru legal services and got turned down, why did they turn you down?
you tried going to the home of the ex, and cant get near him?

edited to add 2 more questions:

how far along are you in your current pregnancy, and are you in a stable relationship?
do you work?

i think these are all questions that the legal system are taking into account when you are asking for full custody of your child.

Then you have to add that the fact that she knows that he is homeschooled. Which means he is home all day WHICH ALSO MEANS if she finds out their address, she can call the cops while she is waiting outside the house so she can at least see her kid. I dunno about other pregnant women but I am pretty convincing to cops to come out to a residence and have them play mediator.

Ive kept a job ive had him in head start im not a druggie a psycho nothing. I let my son go with his father becuase If the roles were reversed Id want him to let me have the chance to get to know him.

So why are you worried about the full custody thing? You show up, tell the judge your side and take your son home.

Ive kept a job ive had him in head start im not a druggie a psycho nothing. I let my son go with his father becuase If the roles were reversed Id want him to let me have the chance to get to know him.

So why are you worried about the full custody thing? You show up, tell the judge your side and take your son home.

not if the father is providing a better living situation with a healthier environment.

i dont know what state(s) or country we're talking about here, but i'm not sure it's that cut and dry.

If he filed for full custody, obviously you need to file for full custody as well. You don't need a lawyer for that and there is absolutely no reason that you will be turned down for trying to FILE. Go do that, ASAP if you want a chance at getting your son back.
As a mother, i'm a little (okay, a lot) baffled at you waiting this long or letting the process be dragged out for this long.

Ive kept a job ive had him in head start im not a druggie a psycho nothing. I let my son go with his father becuase If the roles were reversed Id want him to let me have the chance to get to know him.

So why are you worried about the full custody thing? You show up, tell the judge your side and take your son home.

not if the father is providing a better living situation with a healthier environment.

i dont know what state(s) or country we're talking about here, but i'm not sure it's that cut and dry.

No clue on state because she is vague as hell. And you're right but a judge can award 50/50 or full custody. She hasn't had the kid for a year. Right now, Dad is looking like he is doing something decent if he has someone (or himself) homeschooling the child and under care.

I keep writing stuff and deleting it because I don't want to kick you when you're down but holy hell it's hard.

I didn't have my son for a month and within the first couple days I had a lawyer, cops, and a judge on my speed-dial. If you were serious about getting your son back you wouldn't make some dumbass post on a forum you'd be sitting at a lawyers getting counselled. There are free programs to assist in this EXACT scenario and while they didn't work out for me they should be able to help you in some way.

If I write anymore I'm just going to say bad things so hopefully something above helped you.

Yes dad has remarried hes 28 the women is 50 somthing. He never had any interest in seeing our child till after he was married. the man has 4 other children hes trying to fight for with two other women. he origionally abandoned his children with his mother.

you said "remarried"....you implied before that you two were never married, unless i got the wrong impression.