Would you charge your parents rent?

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  • highervibes
    highervibes Posts: 2,219 Member
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    ******************************************** MORE DETAILS ***************************************************

    - You use to rent out that basement before she occupied it (but the money was just extra spending money)
    - You grew up poor, but your mom did the best she could (was a housewife)
    - You contributed money ever since you turned the working age (either all of pay or minimum $200 per month)
    - You brought in the most money out of all of the family members (father couldn't find work)
    - You were never really close to your mom but there was never any real conflict



    Would these factors change anything?

    ******************************************************************************************************************


    you know A LOT of personal information about your "friend" LOL. Just CHARGE YOUR WIDOWED MOTHER RENT, you obviously want to. Strangers on the internet agreeing with you will not help you consolodate your feelings of guilt with those of entitlement. Ask yourself how you would feel about this when your mother is gone from this Earth and you will have your answer.
  • bettacheckyoself
    bettacheckyoself Posts: 570
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    ******************************************** MORE DETAILS ***************************************************

    - You use to rent out that basement before she occupied it (but the money was just extra spending money)
    - You grew up poor, but your mom did the best she could (was a housewife)
    - You contributed money ever since you turned the working age (either all of pay or minimum $200 per month)
    - You brought in the most money out of all of the family members (father couldn't find work)
    - You were never really close to your mom but there was never any real conflict



    Would these factors change anything?

    ******************************************************************************************************************


    you know A LOT of personal information about your "friend" LOL. Just CHARGE YOUR WIDOWED MOTHER RENT, you obviously want to. Strangers on the internet agreeing with you will not help you consolodate your feelings of guilt with those of entitlement. Ask yourself how you would feel about this when your mother is gone from this Earth and you will have your answer.


    Yes, I know personal information because I was in a heated debate with this person, and this person is in fact close to me. Some people who are on my friend list would know that this isn't me, but I wouldn't expect you to believe me, so go ahead and think what you want.

    I ask because I want to know if anyone shared my views on this.
  • highervibes
    highervibes Posts: 2,219 Member
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    Sub the you and your for they and their, my answer still applies.
  • 1shauna1
    1shauna1 Posts: 993 Member
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    I think if I was struggling myself I might ask her to help out with a couple of hundred bucks a month. But if I'm in a good situation financially, probably I would not. Would mom probably cook dinners & help out around the house anyways? That's great! She'll probably buy stuff for the house anyhow. So, I guess my answer is no! If I can help her have her last years be very comfortable I will do so.
  • _Tink_
    _Tink_ Posts: 3,845 Member
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    I'm sure I'll get a lot of criticism for this, but my mother wouldn't be moving in with me in the first place. If the presence of an additional family member puts an emotional strain on the rest of the family, creates tension, and minimizes quality of life for the other family members...it's not going to happen. I'm not willing to put my family through years of unhappiness for someone who turned her back on me when I needed her the most.
  • cseckinger1
    cseckinger1 Posts: 64
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    I hope your paying her if she is keeping your 4 children under 10!
  • bettacheckyoself
    bettacheckyoself Posts: 570
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    Sub the you and your for they and their, my answer still applies.

    No. Because I want people to treat this as if they were the person I am talking about.
  • highervibes
    highervibes Posts: 2,219 Member
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    . I'm not willing to put my family through years of unhappiness for someone who turned her back on me when I needed her the most.

    That's fair
  • Pangea250
    Pangea250 Posts: 965 Member
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    Oh my God, never. With that little of an income? And I'm doing okay? Never in a million years would I accept a dime from her.
  • Territravel
    Territravel Posts: 165 Member
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    Would depend on if she had charged her child/children rent when they were growing up in her house? - I'd say she's paid her dues once already :wink:


    This!
  • highervibes
    highervibes Posts: 2,219 Member
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    Sub the you and your for they and their, my answer still applies.

    No. Because I want people to treat this as if they were the person I am talking about.

    Well if I was the person you are referring to, I would go to the Home Depot and buy some rope to hang myself with, because I'm a selfish, entitled piece of crap that would throw their mother under the bus for an iThing. better?
  • brichnic
    brichnic Posts: 14
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    God, no.
  • Jerrypeoples
    Jerrypeoples Posts: 1,541 Member
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    did she disown you?
  • Zombella
    Zombella Posts: 490 Member
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    I'd say no unless it was causing a financial stress on you.

    And to those who say "she did that for you" .. parents decide to have children, not the same thing.
  • 4_Lisa
    4_Lisa Posts: 362 Member
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    Absolutely not! I have had my father in law live with us, and even when we were struggling to make ends meet we never charged him a dime. He would however throw money at the bills, because HE thought he should, not us.
  • simplyciera
    simplyciera Posts: 168 Member
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    Depends. My mom taught me to be independent so I'd expect her to do the same. My mom has a master's degree and post-master's certificates & she's 50. I don't think she'd need to stay with me long-term. If she was sick, disabled, mentally unwell, then HELL NO, I wouldn't charge her rent. If I could, I'd quit my job to take care of her.

    But if she just wasn't willing to work for whatever reason, then she does need to help. However, that help could be through babysitting the kids, cleaning or other household chores. That way it wouldn't feel like I was taking care of her like another child.

    ETA: if my mom was just being lazy, was physically able to work but just refusing, I wouldn't let her stay with me. I don't condone that behavior & am not going to teach it to my kid or let her mooch off me. And that's honest)

    My mom always said it was the older generations job to take care of the younger generations until the older generation is physically/mentally unable. At that point, the younger generation needs to pick up the slack. I believe in that. Even though, if I hit the lottery or something, my mom would never work another day in her life.

    My dad? yeah not so much. He couldn't even knock on my door without getting cussed out.
  • highervibes
    highervibes Posts: 2,219 Member
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    I'd say no unless it was causing a financial stress on you.

    And to those who say "she did that for you" .. parents decide to have children, not the same thing.

    No it isn't, but aren't you grateful? I got to live in the house until I was married, which was 25 so I'm pretty darn grateful she didn't kick me out at 16, or start charging me rent.
  • 3foldchord
    3foldchord Posts: 2,918 Member
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    Would depend on if she had charged her child/children rent when they were growing up in her house? - I'd say she's paid her dues once already :wink:

    My parents let me live with them for 19 yrs, gave me life, supported me, taught be to be who I am....etc, etc... Of course I would not charge them rent, and I know they would insists on doing things around the house to be helpful....

    Now, my almost 20'yr old son... I am about ready to charge him rent!
  • kastlekonmama2012
    kastlekonmama2012 Posts: 24 Member
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    How sad that this is even a topic...No Way would I charge my parent. First of all, she is in the basement, you are financially set and she is on a fixed income, and on top of that she has lost her spouse.
  • PinkNinjaKitty
    PinkNinjaKitty Posts: 32 Member
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    HELL NO!! She can contribute by helping with housework or watching kids. That is your mom and she did so much for you, she lost her husband and is already living on practically nothing. As a child it is your duty to take care of your parents when they can't care for themselves.

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