Is my marriage normal?

Sounds completely normal too me. Can't you have someone watch the kids for a few hours a week and get a guy on the side like everyone else?

Does he need to go to the doctor? Maybe he's diabetic or something.

Whether it be marriage councellor or something else, it seems like there needs to be a middle ground. He sounds like he is married is name and money only. If you are talking kid talk all day, then it is nromal to want some real talk later. I mean I work late too, but I try to make sure that at least two or three nights a week, plus weekends I have time for my family. I mean, I am not perfect and my wife gets on my case too, but I do not think it is nearly to this extreme. It sounds as if he does not know what he is missing. Marriage and Family changes things, Family first, friends on weekends are second.

I'm married with kids, stay at home mom. I feel totally alone. My husband works hard at his job, I try to make him happy always. But he has no time for me and the kids. He sleeps as soon as gets home, and when he wakes up he is on his phone or the computer and I go to bed by myself. We don't talk too much and while we do the deed its not as much as either would like. I used to care about him not helping out at all with the kids but now I just want some attention! period. He sleeps weekends too, mostly cause he drinks then. I know he can't be too tired, cause if he wants to work on his truck or do something with friends, he does. He goes to the gym with me also. Are most husbands who work a physical job like this? I ask him and he just says I should try what he does all day and then see how I feel. Anyone else have this issue? Thanks.

Yes and no.

It is normal for parents with kids to get caught up in the grind of daily life. That is kinda of an unfortunate biproduct of responsibility.

But really, this is ony one side fo the story so it is hard to tell what the real issues are. As much as you sound unhappy with the way things are, i am sure he isn't too happy either. That said, you guys need to talk. That is the only starting point that will get you anywhere. If you can't communicate well together, you might try a counselor to help you learn to talk with each other and not at each other. Then you can continue to work on issues to build a marriage you both want. Most likely along the way you will have personal issues you both need to work on indivudually as well as what you want in the marriage. To make it all work, it will take work....and time.

All the best.

Does he need to go to the doctor? Maybe he's diabetic or something.

Or he's drinking too much or is depressed... or all three. It's hard when you are sad and lonely, but you might need to focus on him for the moment. And also, try to get out and make some friends, even if its just parents of your kids' friends.

It is and it isn't. My DH works about 60 hours a week. I run my own businesses and stay with the kids. He makes time for us. I eat dinner at 9pm most nights so he has someone to eat with. We work on our computers together. I travel to meet him for lunch. We are very protectful of weekends or time off. We schedule as much as possible, make sure the kids are in bed early enough to enjoy some time together.

Just talk to him, he likely has no idea.

How much of this have you shared with HIM?

Hi, I'm new to MFP and don't know if this type of thread is allowed, but I have no friends and no one to talk to besides on here and I would like some input somewhere! I've been really focusing on my health and would like to work on me mentally also.

I'm married with kids, stay at home mom. I feel totally alone. My husband works hard at his job, I try to make him happy always. But he has no time for me and the kids. He sleeps as soon as gets home, and when he wakes up he is on his phone or the computer and I go to bed by myself. We don't talk too much and while we do the deed its not as much as either would like. I used to care about him not helping out at all with the kids but now I just want some attention! period. He sleeps weekends too, mostly cause he drinks then. I know he can't be too tired, cause if he wants to work on his truck or do something with friends, he does. He goes to the gym with me also. Are most husbands who work a physical job like this? I ask him and he just says I should try what he does all day and then see how I feel. Anyone else have this issue? Thanks.

Wow, you pretty much just described my marriage. Cept without the working all the time, and his job isn't a physical one......but he's constantly on his phone. and ignores me and our daughter. We literally just fought about this and well, we still are cause I'm finally just tired of dealing with it.
I hope things get better for you! Wish i had some advice for you =/

My marriage has had its ups and downs and this sounds like it can "potentially" be mired through. I say that as I've dealt with this before and my husband didn't even have a physical job just a mentally taxing one.

One of the biggest ways I solved our problem was I had to decide if I was going to stay with this person or if I was going to leave him. I practically begged him for attention. I finally decided that I just couldn't see myself leaving at this point in our marriage (only 8 months in to it) that we deserved to really give it a chance. Any ways, I decided to say f#%@ sitting around here waiting for his to realize he was ruining a good thing. So I got online and I found a mommy group to go meet with during the day while he was at work. I also figured out the library's kid stuff. (this should help you...you claim you have no one to talk to so that may mean that you are shy and/or neglecting your wants and needs by looking only to your husband to fulfill all your friendship needs.) What I realized was that my life was centered around my children, my home and my husband for all my entertainment...etc... So I truly had a sit down with myself and really looked at what I needed. So I decided to just treat him as a roommate. He didn't like telling me where he was going so I started not telling him where I was going. I made play dates. I made friends. Since he would sleep in on the weekends I started taking the baby for a walk in the park. Meeting the girls for a baby play date. It took almost a month for him to realize that I wasn't following him around like a puppy. All of a sudden he was missing me. Where I had now found happiness all of a sudden he realized that I wasn't there waiting for him at home. Maybe it was jealousy on his part or maybe it made him realize that he truly did like having me around.

So I found ME and in the process became a happier me. He got his act together and started putting forth some effort to pay more attention to me.

Not saying this will work for you but even if it doesn't it will give you the confidence to enjoy your life and not to wait around for him to lead the way.