Getting divorced?

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cindyb1984
cindyb1984 Posts: 203 Member
in Motivation and Support
I am just wondering if there are people out there who are able to stay on track while going through marital problems, separation and divorce. My husband is leaving me (he is looking for a new place and will be gone once he finds one) and I am trying to stay on track because I don't want him to take this from me too. I am doing this for ME! But I am struggling. I am such an emotional eater I just want to stuff my face!
If anybody has any advice, please share!
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  • ohnstadk
    ohnstadk Posts: 143 Member
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    Bump
  • Contrarian
    Contrarian Posts: 8,138 Member
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    Stuffing your face is only going to hurt you and make you feel worse. Staying on track will make you feel strong and in control. Which sounds like the preferable option?
  • rhall9058
    rhall9058 Posts: 270 Member
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    You have 20lbs down. While the divorce process is never a happy moment, I know of friends that found that as the motivation to make themselves better. Look better, feel better, etc. Look past the negativity of it, and turn it into positive motivation to "shove it back". Control it, don't let it control you. Remember will power is a short term change. For long term change, you need to change the thought process and motivation!!!
  • pdj1220
    pdj1220 Posts: 175
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    Hmm, mine was just the opposite. I started this journey when I found out about me ex-wife's affair. Really, it just started as I quit drinking beer, and had no appetite. Now it is kind of a habit.
  • marciebrian
    marciebrian Posts: 853 Member
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    I am so sorry. I am an emotional eater as well and was divorced (eventually had it annulled) many years ago. I didn't gain weight and I don't know if it was because I made the decision to leave and just packed and walked. I wish I had advice for but all I can say is what you already know. Eating won't make the pain go away it will make it worse. Exercise, stay busy, go out with your friends, do whatever it takes to have some positive energy. Big hugs and I wish you good luck:love:
  • Trueray
    Trueray Posts: 1,189 Member
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    Surround yourself with like-minded individuals in your area. Join clubs or fitness groups in your area to take your mind of what is going on. Those people will motivate you and keep you accountable if you decide to slip up.
  • alliemarie77
    alliemarie77 Posts: 378 Member
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    I haven't ever been divorced. I have been an emotional eater though. The trick to over coming that is to keep yourself busy when you feel like eating. Instead of going to the kitchen go outside. Go for a walk, do a workout. Look at yourself in the mirror, and remember why you want to lose weight. Drink LOTS of water!

    Find some way to vent. Through a blog, a letter to yourself, or a good friend/family member.
    I wish you the best.
  • BluejayNY
    BluejayNY Posts: 301 Member
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    Hey there. Going through the same fun crap.

    Actually its caused me to get to 116 at 5'6 which is really too small. I look much better around 124.

    You just have to keep taking care of yourself even though its hard. I am going to start adding protein shakes maybe to get enough calories. I keep trying to force myself to eat whatever is around but I am just not getting enough clearly.
  • MissyAZjourney
    MissyAZjourney Posts: 96 Member
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    Agreed...I allowed emotional eating to get the best of me when my husband left me about 7 years ago. I had been on such a good roll losing 100 pounds and it slowly crept back over 7 years. I hope you have a good support system and do something I didn't do--realize that if he is leaving then you can take care of yourself!

    make YOU a priority and your health a priority. Don't waste years of your life stuffing the pain away with food. sweat it out with a good workout!
  • snowmoon13
    snowmoon13 Posts: 165 Member
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    FR sent I went through this five years ago...
  • BITEME_GRRR
    BITEME_GRRR Posts: 150 Member
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    I am not going through a divorce but a very very bad break up. ...only a couple months after my oldest sister died in a tragic car accident.
    I can relate. I have put on 10-15 lbs since she died and I stopped weighing myself.
    I am sad. Alone. In a new town which I moved to for him.

    He was cheating on me I found out, on top of it.
    I have literally been drinking nonstop and pigging out daily.

    I am very sorry. I have no good advice except remember you are in control. You have the choice.
  • mrsjones2point0
    mrsjones2point0 Posts: 332 Member
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    The best revenge is looking insanely hot!

    As this chapter in your life comes to a close, while it is sad, realize that you have a brand new chapter ahead of you that you get to write. And you will find that when you are not so wrapped up in trying to make a bad situation work, you will have more time on your hands to be and do what you want - choose active fun stuff. Choose to eat better, because you get to choose what you want to eat without consulting what he wants. Make this a total all about you time, and rock the **** out of it!
  • catfive1
    catfive1 Posts: 529 Member
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    You have 20lbs down. While the divorce process is never a happy moment, I know of friends that found that as the motivation to make themselves better. Look better, feel better, etc. Look past the negativity of it, and turn it into positive motivation to "shove it back". Control it, don't let it control you. Remember will power is a short term change. For long term change, you need to change the thought process and motivation!!!

    I like this advice.
  • Laac68
    Laac68 Posts: 55
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    First of all, I empathize with you being that I went through a divorce some years ago. The affect that it had on me I actually lost weight because I couldn't eat and was so stressed. What helped me most to get back on track was the support of my family and close friends. I also received some great counsel in the mix as well. Try and take everything one day at a time. You can make it, I did and eventhough I still have weight issues, I am not holding on to the past. I wish you well.:flowerforyou:
  • sunnyside1213
    sunnyside1213 Posts: 1,205 Member
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    This is your chance to get hot, get a hot bf, and rub it in the exes face.
  • JaxDemon
    JaxDemon Posts: 403 Member
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    I am very sorry. I have no good advice except remember you are in control. You have the choice.

    That is good advice, and advice you should be giving yourself to move forward in your life.
  • anacsitham5
    anacsitham5 Posts: 814 Member
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    I totally agree with zippywood! Looking hot and gorgeous will be the best revenge ever!! If you pig out and don't stick to your plan, you won't be able to flaunt what he can't have anymore. Stay strong!
  • cindyb1984
    cindyb1984 Posts: 203 Member
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    Thank you everyone. I will come back to this thread every time I need the reminder that I am doing this for me! Stuffing my face is not going to make things better. I know the next while is going to be difficult, but I am going to try my hardest to stay strong!
    Thank you all so, so much,
    Cindy
  • dwalt15110
    dwalt15110 Posts: 246 Member
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    It has been a long time since my divorce and Annulment, but here is my advice. First, continue on your journey towards becoming healthy and fit. Second, get yourself a great lawyer. Do not use his. Follow through on everything your attorney tells you to do in the quickest possible fashion. Decide what you want in your life and go after it. Put your life on a positive track and you will find that you will not want to be that emotional eater. By all means, look into an annulment, and hopefully move to get it as soon as the divorce is final.

    I wish you the very best. This is not an easy time, but it is what you make it. Don't allow him to rule your life.
  • RenCara
    RenCara Posts: 300 Member
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    Divorce sucks, whether you wanted it or not. Remember that you're calorie consumption and exercise regimen is one thing you have control over during this turbulent time. So, own it. Actually, I embraced this idea and found the structure and consistency, not to mention support (even if it was not about my divorce it gave me an emotional boost) I found on MFP was invaluable as I worked through it all.

    My best to you during this difficult time.

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