Anyone else not telling???

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  • jupdyke
    jupdyke Posts: 325 Member
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    If you're keeping the secret for the only reason of waiting for kudos you're going to have to wait a long time and you will be disappointed. The person who lives with you daily will be the last person to notice.

    I hope you don't get too disappointed and please don't make him look like an *kitten* when someone you haven't seen in a while notices in front of him...

    Oh no, that's not the only reason...him noticing is just a bonus. lol. I know, when you see eachother everyday, you definitely don't notice weightloss or changes as much as you would when you go a length of time without seeing eachother.

    I wouldn't make him feel bad in a million years. I am definitely doing this for myself. Hearing him compliment me again is just an added bonus. I want to feel comfortable and confident again..somehow I lost that in 30lbs.
  • jupdyke
    jupdyke Posts: 325 Member
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    I've been on holiday from work for 5 weeks, have another week to go and have lost 13lbs so far since just before we stopped. I am hoping my workmates see a small difference but won't be bothered if they don't. If no one notices I'm not telling them and will wait and see how long it takes them to notice me loosing weight.

    OOOH..let me know. I am in the same boat as well...I have another 4 wks. off. :)
  • Factory_Reset
    Factory_Reset Posts: 1,651 Member
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    I NEVER tell anyone what I'm in to

    I can't handle being judged

    or the weird looks
  • jupdyke
    jupdyke Posts: 325 Member
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    I did keep it a secret at first - for the same exact reason - i wanted to see if he would notice - because how had he not noticed the 30 lb weight gain - lol - he never ever once said anything about it - which is awesome - but also made it easier to not put down the chocolate - and binge out - cuz he loves me no matter what - right? lol but i finally had to do it for me - i was unhappy with how i looked - but anyways it took about 15 pounds for him to notice which was about 3 months - lol - and then my confidence came back and i felt more sexy which then- that he noticed lol ;) good luck with your journey - hope his reaction is blown away :)

    lol..you sound just like me. I totally get what you're saying....when we feel more confident in our own skin, feel sexier, it all goes to the positive..lol.
  • besaro
    besaro Posts: 1,858 Member
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    when you go from eating cheese sandwiches, cookies, chips and other barely-food items to fruit, vegetables and lightly processed foods, its hard to keep it from the people you live with. As for everyone else, I didnt say anything cause I didnt want to hear their "advice", cause everyone is an expert on weight loss when you are on a "diet".
  • RockinTerri
    RockinTerri Posts: 499 Member
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    I tell, only because it's holding me more accountable. If I'm putting out there in public, then I'll have more asking me about my activities, my dietary choices, what exercises I've tried. I've tried MFP twice before this foray, and failed both times because I kept it secretive. Now I'm successful, and am past that point of wanting to give up. :happy:
  • chaosbutterfly
    chaosbutterfly Posts: 71 Member
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    I didn't at first, just because in the past when I told people that I was losing weight, I didn't follow through and it was embarrassing.
    This time though I stuck with it, and it ended up being really funny to see friends and family realize for the first time that I was getting smaller. It took about 30 pounds for people to catch on.

    It's still really fun to go to gatherings where people haven't seen me since I was at my heaviest or since I started this journey and see people be so shocked at how different I look.
    But then it starts to get annoying because they won't shut up about it or they watch my plate like a bunch of hawks. x_x

    Or even worse, they try to give me advice.
    Telling me not to eat carbs past 3 pm, to start a 1000 sit up a day program for my abs, to do squats in my heels, to eat vegan, eat vegetarian, add fish to my diet, take out fish (I hate fish so I just stare blankly at them), cut my salt, eat a bit more salt, eat acai, eat blueberries, try GLA, etc.
    I know it's because they want to help, but it's like ugh get out. I don't need your advice, I got this.
  • Okisweetpea
    Okisweetpea Posts: 19 Member
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    Nope, I'm not telling! I know I sound like a broken record to myself, I can only imagine what I sound like to others. So now I am just doing it and enjoying what I am seeing. The biggest thrill for me is that when I do see some family members again -the looks on their faces- will have made not telling all worth it. They do say action speaks louder than words!

    My husband on the other hand has an idea but I don't even talk about it to him anymore because we are just in seperate places when it comes to eating healthy, working out and things like that.
  • Amitysk
    Amitysk Posts: 705 Member
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    My boyfriend knows, mainly because he's sees that I'm logging. But I don't really talk about my fitness goals that much with him. I haven't talked to my co-workers about it, but they tend to think I'm all about fitness and health anyway.
  • newjojie
    newjojie Posts: 291 Member
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    I have started and stopped trying to loose weight many times. This time I didn't say anything at first, just wanted to see if I could commit before saying anything. He knows now and is supportive and probably would have been from the beginning.
  • Pinkee33
    Pinkee33 Posts: 769 Member
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    The only person I've told is my husband. I think my mom and sister kind of know since I've mentioned the site before, but as far as I know no one else knows. I'd like to keep it that way. There's so much stigma over the word "diet".

    There is a lot of stigma attached to the word, "diet" therefore I refuse to use it! I just say I'm exercising and choosing to make better choices for a healthier lifestyle.... I don't tell myself that I cannot have something as that would be sabotage everything right there..... like today, I will be having pizza and I don't feel bad about it! lol All in moderation, right?
  • Jeffy67
    Jeffy67 Posts: 112 Member
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    I need to. DH and I have both put on weight, but it's much more noticeable with my small frame. But everytime I try to start losing weight he makes me not want to by telling me I can't do it.

    That's to bad he tells you that. My partner encourages me.
    Stick to your guns and let him know your doing this and nothing is gonna stop you !
    :)
  • yowla
    yowla Posts: 127 Member
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    Is anyone else keeping their diet/exercise a secret?
    [/quote]

    I would like to but he can see everything I do. He is on my friends list here. He tries to wake me up and work out in the morning and I would love to workout with him but he is mean when we workout together and then by the time I get home and have to deal with the kids and all the house hold stuff I am exhausted and ready to make dinner. He doesn't understand. He thinks the kids and house is easier than working. Well put a part time job plus cleaning when part time when needed too on top of all of it. I just can't hide anything from him. Everything I get up and leave the room he asks what I am doing or where I am going.
    I need help doing this? Anyone want to friend me and help me??? :flowerforyou:
  • junejadesky
    junejadesky Posts: 524 Member
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    It seems strange to me that anyone would keep it a secret. Of course I have read why and understand why so many would, but I am the complete opposite. My hubby has been supportive, we meal plan together, and he is willing to do anything to change over to healthy habits to support me. I can't imagine being with someone who sabotages or eats bad food in front of you because that must be very discouraging and dis-heartening!

    I would tell your spouse and he'll give you the support you need. And I have seen a few guys comment that they just don't comment on their SOs weight loss because women are ticking time bombs in that respect... they just can't win sometimes so why say anything!

    Good luck with your goals!
  • Sharon_C
    Sharon_C Posts: 2,132 Member
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    When I first started, I didn't tell him. I never have when I started a new diet. But I have the opposite problem. He's TOO supportive. Constantly monitoring what I eat, commenting if he doesn't think I should be eating it. It drives me crazy. He's a health nut and to be honest I'd weigh WAY more than I do now if it wasn't for him. But he doesn't understand that I need to do this in my own way and not the way he would do it.

    I've been on MFP a year now and I told him a few months after I started. He's pretty much left me alone with my food choices and occasionally asks if I'm still logging.
  • BrunetteRunner87
    BrunetteRunner87 Posts: 591 Member
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    If you're keeping the secret for the only reason of waiting for kudos you're going to have to wait a long time and you will be disappointed. The person who lives with you daily will be the last person to notice.

    I hope you don't get too disappointed and please don't make him look like an *kitten* when someone you haven't seen in a while notices in front of him...

    I agree with this, not to be mean, but it's hard to notice when you see someone every day! Just be prepared to wait a while before he says anything.

    I've been doing this off and on for two years, so mine is used to it. It never really comes up anymore.
  • DanaeMonique
    DanaeMonique Posts: 41 Member
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    You shouldn't look at it as a "DIET", I highly dislike that word, because it is not a diet, it's a healthy and active lifestyle! You gained 30 lbs because of an unhealthy lifestyle, a diet to me is temporary because your only going to work out and eat right for a certain amount of time when you should do this for the rest of your life. Secondly, there is NO SECRET!!! lol, it's all about Consistency! Consistency in fitness and eating healthy, that is it! 30 lbs you got this! If you start today I am pretty sure you will lose it by mid-December! Well Wishes on your new lifestyle!
  • Julzanne72
    Julzanne72 Posts: 467 Member
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    I find this to be a really touchy subject for me. I want to succeed and I have tried and failed so many times. My family/fiancé are an awesome support system, but I find when they critique me, that I get very defensive, and I don't think that helps anyone. I think from here on out I want to just keep it to myself, because this about me, not anyone else but me. I need to get healthy and do this for me. Once we are married we are thinking about having a baby, and I WILL NOT get pregnant at the weight I am at. I have to be healthier so that IF I do get pregnant that I can be healthy from the get go and hopefully continue to be active through my pregnancy
  • MrsPong
    MrsPong Posts: 580 Member
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    My husband is a VERY fit U.S Marine of 9 years. SOOO working out is "easy". I was always pretty much in shape, had a baby...got heavy....then really thin...then heavy.

    He kinda hinted I would start, stop, start, stop and complain I was "fat". I got fed up with him so I refused to talk to him about ANYTHING food/diet/fitness related. I did 30 day shred for 30 days without him knowing at all. I lost 10 lbs. Then I told him. I told him I can do it all on my own without him "pushing" me in the negative way. He saw the results, learned I'm a big girl and backed off.

    Since then I've been dealing with alot of medical problems, but lost 10 more lbs.. He pretty much backs off and wont say anything due to before (even if I BEG). Now I'm pretty much open with him.

    The rest of the world: Private. I don't tell anyone anything. If they mention I lost weight, I will comment yes I have and thank you. It's just a hassel to hear numbers, diet choices, and so on.
  • Cinloykko
    Cinloykko Posts: 117 Member
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    I told everyone because i thought that wud get me more support and what not... But all I've gotten are discouragements and the half hearted "you don't need to lose weight....." ... If i cud do it over, i wud keep it a secret until I've seen some results. Because right now, all my friends and family do is buy junk foods to tempt me to get off my diet and all my friends joke about my calorie counting.
    Lol

    I read somewhere that our friends and family will tend to be our downfall. Nobody likes change and losing weight is a dramatic change for us. But i say, keep up the good work!!! Don't let other's words get to you too much and in the end, you'll be happy and healthy and thats all that matters :-)

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