support for Binge Eating Disorder

WOW! I had a very good day! I had a couple of boiled eggs mid morning instead of my usual granola bar, and that carried me through so much better! I think I'm gonna go low carb. My body seems to respond better to that style of eating. Carbs just make me want more carbs.

I hear you about popcorn, Diane!! I could eat it til I puke!
:-)
Bless you all!

Hi Mollie. You are definitely rocking the exercise lately and I am very inspired by seeing that on my news feed. I'm like wow, Mollie can do over an hour on the eliptical, that is AMAZING!!! You are doing very well ma'am. :flowerforyou:

Right now it is 9pm and I haven't eaten since about 4 when I finished my 3rd eating experience. Not intentionally but I had my workout at 6pm and then when I got home I've had this horrible feeling that once I get started I'm not going to be able to stop so I haven't eaten anything yet and am hoping that I can just fast the rest of the day and avoid it all together today. My fiancee is on his way over for a quick hello and then I should be off to bed.

Well today's post is much different than yesterdays because I had a really bad evening. It started with too much chocolate and not being able to say no to some free cookies to stopping at Wendy's for a small frosty because I "needed" it...Um, yeah, I don't have much to say about yesterday other than I logged it all and even with the splurge I wasn't much over 3000 calories, but I do feel like crap today because of it. My body is letting me know it did not appreciate the binge.

Today will be better.

Weekends ARE pretty hard!
I really don't know how I managed to stay under my calories, but I did!

I can't even allow myself to enjoy that victory, though, because it was SO HARD!!!!!!!!!!! It felt like such deprivation! I just wish I could eat like a normal person without the effort half killing me.

Can you guys relate to that?

Thanks for being there!!!

I have nothing but guilt and abject shame at what I ate over the weekend. I was away Fri-Mon for a half marathon on Sun, and a mix of 'holiday mode' and a knowledge that I actually HAD to eat a little more than normal (based on feeling unwell at a race two weeks ago) and I went mental. Even if I wanted to, I couldn't write everything I ate, suffice it to say I ate from the time I woke up on Friday until last thing last night: some of it was healthy, most of it wasn't.

I couldn't stop. I didn't want to stop (although of course I did). And now I feel just awful that I have so little control.

Ladies, thank you both for sharing. Things could definitely be better for me as well. I don't know what it is but like a light switch ever since I had to take my cat in I just have lost my ability to say no, I don't need that. And now, it's like oh, well that will cheer me up or make me feel better, or oh I can just have a little and then a little turns into a lot because I want more more more. I feel insatiable some days...and then I think oh I just don't care. But I DO care? Why can't I get it together again? Friday & Sun were not great, Sat was just ok, yesterday was better, but I want to be proud of my diary and show it off and now I've hidden it because I just can't bear to show it to people because I feel ashamed of how many bad foods I've eaten lately when I'm supposed to be trying to lose weight! I know I need to not be so hard on myself and all that, I do know that. I'm just frustrated now because I went for so many months feeling like I had it together and that I had started to overcome this thing and now I feel like I've just been pushed so many steps back. I have been doing a lot of thinking about this and I'm definitely not admitting defeat, that I will no longer do. But since I've been met with yet another challenge it is time to shake things up. So, I have started to go through my friends list and minimize so that I can continue the strong relationships that I have made with people on here and not worry about every Sue, Jane and Mary that wants to send me a friend request. I've decided to hide my diary just for a while until I feel better about it. And I have changed my settings to not show me sodium as that tends to frustrate me and when I'm already frustrated about trying to put healthy foods in me, I need to not have to pay so much attention to that right now.

One evening at a time...(since days aren't a problem lol)

Hi Bettany, thanks for posting. Not sure how active this thread is, but I'm here! Please feel free to message me anytime.

RECOVERY MEDITATIONS
One Day at a Time
September 27, 2010

~ PATIENCE ~

:~*~:. .:~*~:. .:~*~:. .:~*~:. .:~*~:. .:~*~:

Patience and diligence, like faith, remove mountains.

William Penn

:~*~:. .:~*~:. .:~*~:. .:~*~:. .:~*~:. .:~*~:

When I first came into the doors of this
program, I didn't even know what
abstinence was. I thought I was on a
diet. It turned out to be far more than
I ever imagined. In the short time I've
been in program, I've had perfect
abstinence, I've lost weight and my
physical, emotional and spiritual
well-being has changed more than I ever
thought possible.

I've come so far in this program
... beyond my wildest dreams ... yet,
sometimes it feels like it's still not
enough. I'll weigh myself one month and
think, "Is that all I've lost? Why
couldn't I have lost more?" It's times
like this when I try to remember how I
was before program, going through diet
after diet only to fail again and
again. What difference does it make if I
don't lose weight as fast as somebody
else or as fast as I feel that I should?
It's not a race or a competition. It's
not even about how little or how much I
weigh. It's about finding peace and
recovery and happiness within myself. My
body feels great, my mind feels
wonderful and I'm happier and closer to
God than I ever thought I could possibly
be. How could I ask for anything more?

ONE DAY AT A TIME . . .

I pray my Higher Power gives me the
strength to continue my abstinence, the
courage to be patient with my progress,
and the wisdom to remember that My
physical, emotional and spiritual
well-being is a far more precious gift
than any number the scale could ever
show.

Yay, our thread has life! LOL Happy to see some posters this week.

Ooooh, another cat lover! Whoo hoo!

Today is no problem with bingeing. I had a root canal yesterday and am so sore. Pain killers are making me a little woozy and I think the combination is sure taking away my appetite. Will be going to bed early. Hope everyone is well!