S/O Threatens to Leave if You Lose / Don't Lose Weight...

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Replies

  • Willbenchforcupcakes
    Willbenchforcupcakes Posts: 4,955 Member
    My then fiance told me I should go on the biggest loser while I watched it one night. I was hurt, but the fact of the matter is that I was obese, close to morbidly so.

    When I started weighing less than him, he started losing interest. Now that I'm bulking, I know he hopes I'll get bigger than him again, he does not like to hear about a cut coming after this bulk.

    If push comes to shove, he's gone. I value my health and wellness far more than his desire for me to be slightly overweight.
  • bambishealth
    bambishealth Posts: 134 Member
    RIGGGGGGHHHHHHT!!!!!
  • IpuffyheartHeelsinthegym
    IpuffyheartHeelsinthegym Posts: 5,573 Member
    lose 200 real quick like - divorce his *kitten*. Presto done-o! Oh, then lose the weight, if YOU'D like.
  • jenbk2
    jenbk2 Posts: 614 Member
    Um no. :huh:
  • Danalynn39
    Danalynn39 Posts: 38
    I actually had something similiar said to me. Mine said "fat doesn't turn me on", "I'll quit drinking when you lose weight" and other things. Well, I'm now 5 plus days a week cardio with a trainer. Almost daily he asks if I plan to leave him for the trainer..bahaha...Tables are turning buddy. I think it's time to put the bottle down. Just sayin...Not leaving for the trainer. But he will eat ALL of those words. Even if it's years later. Do it only for you! Not for someone else. And in YOUR time!
  • NavyKnightAh13
    NavyKnightAh13 Posts: 1,394 Member
    I was heavier when my husband and i got together and got married. But he loves that I have lost weight. He and I wouldn't leave each other for one reason other then love: we are used to each others farts and various scents and aromas therefore to start over with someone else would just be a pain.

    I also make the man sammiches when he wants them, even when I don't want to.

    But if he ever did leave, I would do what my mom did: sit at the table and cry, then go to the courthouse the next morning and file for divorce.
  • rheum109
    rheum109 Posts: 5 Member
    The good news if there is any here is he is telling you this before you get married. This is a hugh warning sign about you are going to have to deal with should he become more then an X at this point. You lose weight on your terms as any other way is destine for failure.
  • simsburyjet
    simsburyjet Posts: 999 Member
    :glasses:
  • EnuffaMyButt
    EnuffaMyButt Posts: 111 Member
    take the keys and wave bye!
  • BranMuffin86
    BranMuffin86 Posts: 314 Member
    Let him look at my *kitten* while I walk away! I need someone who would support me.
  • mandasalem
    mandasalem Posts: 346 Member
    did the weight come on after the relationship started?

    if i buy a porsche and 2 years later i open my garage and it turned into an '87 geo, i'd be pissed.

    This would make sense if you bought a car based on its personality, intelligence, sense of humor, emotional outlook, etc. If you do, then I'm not touching that issue with a ten-foot pole.
  • ajaxe432
    ajaxe432 Posts: 608 Member
    Keep him around until your weight loss is complete and say "later"! It will sink in harder that way:)
  • Cliffslosinit
    Cliffslosinit Posts: 5,044 Member
    Dump him and have sex with his best friend.

    You....I like you!:flowerforyou:
  • missymakayla
    missymakayla Posts: 309 Member
    I would leave that person. If they really cared and loved you, they would want a healthier you. It sounds like to me, that they are worried about you looking hot, and other people looking at you.... lose the S/O and the weight too, it would be the best thing for you.. Good luck....
  • jenn26point2
    jenn26point2 Posts: 429 Member
    What would you do ?

    Let 'em go. Obviously they don't love you.
  • beachgod
    beachgod Posts: 567 Member
    3j8p.jpg
  • jwstew007
    jwstew007 Posts: 67
    You know, I can speak somewhat from the other side on this, here's a month old comment I wrote to another person that left their husband after he wouldn't get fit and eat healthy as she was losing...
    I honestly have this fear with my wife, she's on the other side of the country while I just moved somewhere because I wanted to restart my life and get healthy and fit. I'm finding a new apartment and all the other things to get the new life ready before she comes out in a few months.

    I keep telling her life here will be different, she's always like "you keep saying that", in truth, it won't be like anything it was before when we would lay around the tv and do nothing but get fat. I've made considerable effort to changing my life here, I log my food everyday, I walk everywhere, I eat more nutritious food, no more vehicles.

    I've already started this journey, but she's still at home, refusing to even use myfitnesspal to log what she eats. I love her a lot.. but I want to tell her that if she wants things to stay the way things are we need to part ways, and I can't make her change and she needs to want to do this for her as much as I want to do this for me.

    I love her a lot, and she says she is making progress at home now, but I think I just wanted her to share the same level of enthusiasm as I do for fitness and getting healthy, but I don't want her to feel like she's doing this for me.. =/
  • vytamindi
    vytamindi Posts: 845 Member
    Lose the weight and then leave him.
    Lose the S/O first. Then, lose the weight.

    I AM CONFUSE
  • BamaBreezeNSaltAire
    BamaBreezeNSaltAire Posts: 966 Member
    I would say "*kitten* you". *Autobots roll out*

    OMG - can I marry you?
  • Achaila
    Achaila Posts: 264 Member
    IMO telling your S/O how they should and should not look is controlling and somewhat abuse. I'd imagine if they are making comments about your weight demanding that you do or do not do something about it, they also make demands in other parts of your relationship that aren't healthy as well.

    On that note I'd pat him on the stomach and tell him he could stand to lose a few himself, then leave.
  • SezxyStef
    SezxyStef Posts: 15,267 Member
    I can't pick which one I like best...
    Tell him all the people you KIK'd a naked pic to said they would hit it....(the rest will take of itself)

    or
    Dump him and have sex with his best friend.

    Evil I am...

    But really the SO should not in anyway be delivering ultimatiums this way...unless of course it's life or death.

    My own husband has asked I not get "too skinny" and showed me what he meant (very very cut woman)...I will respect his wishes but only because I don't want to look like that either...
  • jenn26point2
    jenn26point2 Posts: 429 Member
    Dump him and have sex with his best friend.

    And I'd do this... :)
  • lifeskittles
    lifeskittles Posts: 438 Member
    Can't love someone who doesn't love themselves. Not that an ultimatum is the answer but when someone doesn't care about themselves they are 100,000 times less attractive in my opinion. Taking care of yourself via career and your health is loving yourself. Peeps need goals!
  • fannyfrost
    fannyfrost Posts: 756 Member
    I don't like shallow people, so if what I look like is the only reason you are here, see you. However, if my SO framed it as I am worried because you are so heavy and unhealthy, then well that is different.

    FYI, I know someone who changed her eating, changed her attitude and got thin, well it ended her marriage because her husband wanted her to stop exercising and sit down and play video games while eating fried chicken. He said "you don't eat normal food" fried chicken and french fries. So the changes can have impact on relationships.
  • cicisiam
    cicisiam Posts: 491 Member
    "Hasta la vista Babee!!!!"
  • Alex_is_Hawks
    Alex_is_Hawks Posts: 3,499 Member
    did the weight come on after the relationship started?

    if i buy a porsche and 2 years later i open my garage and it turned into an '87 geo, i'd be pissed.

    I don't think that's what TrueRay meant by "Autobots roll out!"
  • miss_jessiejane
    miss_jessiejane Posts: 2,819 Member
    He's the man and the wife always obeys the husband. I would do what I'm told.

    She's right.
  • Alluminati
    Alluminati Posts: 6,208 Member
    What is with your topics today, OP? Is there something you're trying to tell us?
  • teamAmelia
    teamAmelia Posts: 1,247 Member
    What would you do ?

    It depends. If I was anorexic and wanted to keep losing weight and he was telling me to stop losing weight - or - if I was overweight and he was concerned for my health and wanted me to lose weight for health reasons (and not vanity), I would see him as being supportive. I would make sure that he didn't have strict restrictions and would still stand by me as long as I'm trying. Now, if he just didn't want me to lose weight for some silly reason such as him liking big girls, or wanting me to lose weight bc he doesn't like the way that I look, then I'd leave him.
  • skullshank
    skullshank Posts: 4,323 Member
    did the weight come on after the relationship started?

    if i buy a porsche and 2 years later i open my garage and it turned into an '87 geo, i'd be pissed.

    It is not my usual wont to disparage the opinions of others by casting personal aspersions, however this would indicate, sir, that you are a douche. Perhaps you would like to revise your opinion or risk being thought brutish by people of character. ... Just sayin'

    lol perhaps it was a poor analogy, and the point brought up of personality, sense of humor, etc. are quite valid.

    i guess what i was trying to say, in a not so brutish way, is that physical attraction is still key in a relationship. it's not everything, but it is important. if one person completely lets themself go so far as to become unattractive to the other and the relationship suffers (even to the point of ending), i really dont think this should be a huge surprise.

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