i have absolutely no will power..

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  • BelleVegan77
    BelleVegan77 Posts: 70 Member
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    Find something that excites you in a reward. Starter photos so you can compare later. A chart. A present or reward. Anything that helps you get there. Don't give up...get started. I promise once you get that first pound off... oh it is addictive. A single pound and I feel like I am floating physically cause my body feels so much lighter. It is SO awesome. You can do it you can!!!!
  • _HeartsOnFire_
    _HeartsOnFire_ Posts: 5,304 Member
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    MOST importantly, when you start...if you slip and pig out one meal, or miss an exercise....give yourself a break. Do NOT, I repeat, DO NOT beat yourself up about it, or get mad or frustrated with yourself. There will be slip ups, and you know what, IT'S OKAY!!! One missed exercise, one huge meal will NOT derail all the progress. So do not beat yourself up. Just pick yourself up, learn from it and keep going. Every meal is a fresh start. So is every day.
  • _HeartsOnFire_
    _HeartsOnFire_ Posts: 5,304 Member
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    I forgot one more super important thing.

    DECIDE AND BELIEVE IN YOURSELF AND THAT YOU ARE WORTH IT!!!
  • ydailey
    ydailey Posts: 516 Member
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    That sounds a lot like depression to me. I understand that you don't want to use pharmaceuticals if you don't have to, so I'd suggest trying some non-pharmaceutical treatments for depression. Don't think about losing weight so much as being healthier overall. One of the very best treatments is exercise, which ironically is hard to do when you are depressed. I was severely depressed earlier this year and although I've had success with antidepressants in the past, I didn't have health insurance and I wanted to avoid going to my doctor if possible.

    If you're feeling low you won't have much motivation so you have to start small. You'll probably find that as you begin to accomplish little goals you'll have more energy and motivation to make the next ones a little bigger. (My goal was to do SOMETHING for exercise every day in August.) Find something that you can drag yourself out of your chair for, whether it's a short walk or a swim or a session of WiiFit - whatever you can manage. Then be sure you give yourself credit for what you do, because when we're depressed we start to focus on the fact that we aren't doing anything and that just makes us feel worse. I posted written lists in my journal, and some days they included things like "washed a load of clothes" or "loaded the dishwasher" or even "took a shower." Those things may seem trivial to most people, but when you're depressed they are a big deal!

    Try to be realistic about what you expect from yourself and don't yourself up for failure. Remember that every journey starts with one step - it's easier to stay motivated if you focus on one step at a time.
  • ArcyF
    ArcyF Posts: 23 Member
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    Yes you do have willpower!
    you're just overwhelmed by all that your experiencing at the moment.

    Soooo, stop thinking, stop stressing, don't do anything.....just breathe...
    Breathe deeply...in & out...in & out....then once you're calm, decide what you would like to do next.

    I would take out a sheet of paper or open up a blank document on your computer and start typing/writing...
    Express your frustrations, what may have lead you to find yourself in this predicament, what would you like for yourself and most importantly
    SET SOME GOALS...little-itty bitty goals at first.

    Ex. I'm going to start tracking what I eat. That's what MFP is for- and make your diary private, if you don't want people checking out what you are eating
    I'm going to start exercising- walk around the block, if you have pets- walk them
    I'm going to stop eating so much bad foods, BUT will allow myself a treat for hard work and if I slip up, I will not penalize myself, and keep tracking- keep trying to eat healthier
    I will drink more water, because water is an extremely essential component of life.

    ....And any other goals you can think of or that others can help you form...

    It's hard. I won't lie to you. Nothing is ever easy, but nothing worthwhile ever is.
    The main point is to NEVER EVER Give up. Don't lose hope. There are tons of people walking in your shoes at this very moment, people who think they're lost, people who are at a breaking point and don't know what else to do with themselves.
    Remember that you're not alone. You're never alone, the people that have responded to you have proven that.

    And always have that sheet of paper, or journal, or document at hand. Maybe make several copies of those initial goals and place them all over you. To remind you constantly of what you are doing and why you're doing it.
    You can do it! I believe in you! Now all you have to do is believe in yourself.

    I'm sorry if anything sounded cheesy but I meant every word with all my heart. Feel free to add me, or message me and I'd be more than happy to help you start your journey.

    :smile:
  • BarefootSerenity
    BarefootSerenity Posts: 100
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    I've been through this. My highest weight was 365. Wild, isn't it? I would binge daily on sugary, nutrient-empty foods: a whole pizza, quart of ice cream, Oreos, bread with butter and honey (all in one sitting)... resulting in 3000-5000 calorie daily binges. I have done low calorie, low fat, low carb, fasting, starving, pill - diets. Nothing worked for me long term. Years passed by. I lost 5 pounds, gained 7. It's a vicious cycle. Before I knew, I was 365 pounds. I have a wonderful husband who loves me unconditionally. My weight has never been an issue for him. We came to the point in our life of being ready to have a baby. A baby at 365 was possible, but can you imagine all the possible problems? It isn't just me anymore. So I set a goal: lose weight to have a healthy pregnancy. Down 80 pounds so far.

    So set a goal. Not just any little, insignificant goal. Something you are serious about. Also, read IT STARTS WITH FOOD. I highly recommend it. This book saved my life. It explains in great detail why you eat what you eat and how you can break the cycle.

    You have to get rid of the " I can't mindset. " If you think you can't, you won't. The best of luck to you!!!!
  • lillyringlet
    lillyringlet Posts: 2
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    You have admitted that you need to make a change and that is an important step! Find someone close who is trying to lose weight too and keep updated with them about both of your progress.

    Take things one step at a time but there are little things that you can do to make things easier for you.

    Remove all the really tempting foods in the house and replace them with easier lower calorie options. Give tempting food away, even throw a food party where people come over to eat food up (normally did these when moving house or leaving uni).

    Never go to the shops hungry, and keep inspiration or reminders in places which will stop you from just going and buying something naughty (like in your purse or on the way out the door).

    I think the fact that you can use my fitness pal to find out just how much you are really eating (and I have found this extremely useful for me and my partner).

    Will power is easier when the temptations are removed. Also if you still feel hungry then have a drink as many times you are thirsty not hungry so I have a nice big glass of water if between meals and just after a main meal.
  • TinaBean007
    TinaBean007 Posts: 273 Member
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    Find people to be friends with here on MFP. It really helps to have the support and the knowledge of those who have been here and are losing weight successfully!!

    ^This is a big part of it... especially reading through you very emotional post. It's an emotional journey. Build a network of people that can help/motivate/influence you.

    Feel free to add me... even though I'm in a diff place right now (9 months pregnant) I'd love to be your cheerleader and butt kicker (when necessary)
  • enidite
    enidite Posts: 92 Member
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    It is pretty overwhelming when you have a long road ahead of you. Like others said one step at a time and if you slip get up and keep on going. There will be obstacles and it won't be easy but you can do it. When I feel like I can't do it, I go to the success board and look at before and after pictures. You will see amazing transformations there and I bet these people have been at a point where they thought it is impossible to ever get to goal.
    You wrote that you could get Adipex. I would go for it. I am on it and I am so grateful to get a head start. It has helped me to curb my cravings tremendously and allowed me to just get started. Your physician will be able to determine if this drug would be the right choice for you. It is not a magic pill but it will help you to just get started.
    There is one success story in particular that really resonated with me , you might want to read it as it says it all:
    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/1092179-in-19-months-i-ve-lost-262-pounds-new-me-new-life
    Weight loss can be done. It requires a lot of work, dedication and determination. But you will emerge as a stronger person as you work through all the obstacles and battles along the way.
    Check in here often, get into therapy if you feel it could help you and if you can afford it ( I did because my food issues are deep) and keep on going. You can do it and we are cheering for you. Oh, and throw the food that you can't stay away from out. Your taste will change as you experiment and introduce new foods. You will be surprised what you will all discover. You can reintroduce this tempting food later again, but for now, try to set up an environment that will help you succeed if possible.
    If you would like, feel free to add me as your buddy.
    Good luck and hang in there.
  • action_figure
    action_figure Posts: 511 Member
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    My standard answer is in this blog post.

    http://actionfiguremini.tumblr.com/post/53432744622/lost-your-motivation-my-standard-answer
  • RhonndaJ
    RhonndaJ Posts: 1,615 Member
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    My willpower took a hike a few months ago. Every day I make a new start. Some days I manage through a day perfect, some days not so much.

    The key is to get to a point where the days you get through near perfect number more than the days you don't. Because most of this is about habit.

    Habit and finding the right mindset. I'm of the belief that the hardest part is getting your head in the game, the body will then follow.

    I wish you the best of luck in your journey, and I do agree with a lot of what has been said here, and that having great people on your friend feed is fantastic.
  • amandamccaw86
    amandamccaw86 Posts: 2 Member
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    I am sorry to hear that you are having a hard time.

    I don't know that will power can be found, like so many people have said.

    You just need to know that you deserve to be healthy, happy, and feel good about you.

    Today only make one goal : Do something healthy that makes you feel good about YOU. I think we overwhelm ourselves to make these drastic changes and become discouraged when we don't succeed. Make a choice today. Look at this as a journey to feel better about YOU.

    You are amazing. You deserve all the effort you put in yourself. It's all mental. Whether you think you will fail or you think you will succeed, you are 100% correct.
  • Clementljones
    Clementljones Posts: 3
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    Hi from what you've said and what I've read here, your lack of will power is because maybe you can't remember what its like to have the feeling that you are worth something, try and remember a time when "you" felt great, once you have identified that try and remember what was happening around you what you looked like and how you interacted with people ..you soo deserve to be that person again, someone who can walk out proud of who you are and not what people think off you...use that feeling to catapult yourself into taking the first steps on your journey to feeling great...log your progress through your food and exercise diary and believe you are no different from me and the other people on this site I can do it ...they can do it...you can do it.....good luck kido
  • USLJH10
    USLJH10 Posts: 22 Member
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    Only you can decide when, only you... you can't depend on others to get you this. Only you... when you realize this, you will be ready...it's all about finding your power. it's a power we all have.... When you find it, you will feel amazing. It's not something that going to happen easily. It's a life time change and only you have the control. You can find support from others but you control what goes in your mouth. It's easier said then done, but as you can see on MFP it is being done. You can do it just like anybody else there's nothing magical about it. It's self control... we all have bad days and fall off the wagon sometimes, but you get back on and try again. You can do it... You have to want it more than anything else.
  • Patty19550711
    Patty19550711 Posts: 6 Member
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    I agree with those who are saying to take it one day at a time. Even one meal at a time, if necessary. Don't beat yourself up if you slip. Get back up. Reach out to your MFP friends. You can do it! If no other exercise - then just walk a little. Even a few minutes makes me feel better. But this is not about me. It's about you. Also, put on your make up and fix your hair. Apply body lotion and powder after you shower. Put on something that makes you feel good..... If you look better, you WILL feel better. I can tell you from experience.
  • yunglady
    yunglady Posts: 3
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    I totally understand I was doing good with exercising and dieting for 6 months and I stopped exercise and in and out of my diet for the past 2 month and now I'm trying to get back into it....Man its like starting all over again I have to fight myself to exercise I want/eat cinnamon rolls and cakes and donuts all the time.... You are not alone! :wink:
  • kaladavis16
    kaladavis16 Posts: 1 Member
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    Well the first step is getting motivated. I feel the same way that you do. I gained almost fifty pounds after getting marriend and kept falling into a deeper hole of depression. The worse I felt about myself the more I ate and I feel like I'm walking around with this huge cloak of laziness over me. I think about going walking and I sit there the sad thing is two years ago my husband and I almost filed for a divorce. we were seperated for almot a year. during that time I lost 40lbs. After we got back to gether it took me just 6 months to pack it all back on. The reason Im on here is to find motivation. I changed my pinterist interest to healthy motivational foods, quotes, and ideas. I'm looking for a partner that does not know me to help as a support buddy. If you are interested e-mail me at kaladavis16@hotmail.com. think we both need some positive reinforcement and since we dont know each other we dont have to fear being judged?
  • xRiverX
    xRiverX Posts: 149 Member
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    Sorry to hear this but I guess when youre ready youre ready?

    The idea is dont rush and little by little,read and enducate,I believe it all starts with your brain to process a plan.

    once you have the plan ,execute it and dont have you goals to high again bit by bit.

    exercise by walking half a mile or 1k use an app like runkeeper,do this 1-3 times a week.

    weigh yourself once a week and log it down and dont get upset if you havent lost any,just know by next year you wont be that same weight.

    after 4 weeks or so you may see some great results then carry on,but keep re educating yourself and try different foods etc and exercises to stop you from getting bored once a month that is.

    I wish you the best of luck but I know its not luck :)
  • sarahkatara
    sarahkatara Posts: 826 Member
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    It almost sounds like you are suffering from depression. I would seek a therapist's help to get your life on track <3
  • SheilaG1963
    SheilaG1963 Posts: 298 Member
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    Baby steps!! Don't look at it as if you have to lose 50 pounds. Start with 2 pounds or even 1 pound. Little goals eventually make up a big goal.

    Anyone can add me if they want. I try to log daily, except 1 day on the weekend is my free day.

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