Why is this even remotely controversial?
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trying to imagine one of my girlfriends in fetal position in her kitchen, crying because her boyfriend dumped her cause she quit cleaning for 4 days while she had a bad case of cramps.
lol
they would laugh in his face.0 -
Stop whining and make me a sammich.0
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Housework still burns more cals than sitting on the couch :drinker:0
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Another good point.Housework still burns more cals than sitting on the couch :drinker:0 -
Well, at least one study suggests that the reason women aren't saying "help me" is because they intuit the marriage will break down if they don't keep dusting..
who on earth are these people? this is surely not my generation.There are other studies showing that marriage generally benefits male health indicators (because they get emotional support, don't have to do all this work -- counted in HOURS, not individual things -- women just do *more*) while women tend to be more stressed by marriage because they're doing all this stuff. I can dig those up sometime but have to be off.
who on earth are these people? I dont know anyone in my age group who is married or in a live-in relationship who is more stressed because she has to do more. Perhaps this is because I live somewhere non-traditional, but i have lots of traditional friends and they all seem to split everything up just fine. from bills to housework.Mind you, it's true that men actually die earlier, because of the nature of the stress they deal with. But, women live those extra years with poor health. all this is "tend to", ok, generalizations..
I dont think its fair to talk about how long men and women in our generation live and what our quality of life is like in our golden years - as this is also the first generation where more women are choosing not to get married and have kids than any other generation previously. We dont start having kids at 12 anymore. We dont have twisted up Silent Hill type medical care, we dont spend our days socially isolated, we dont give up all our dreams and goals once we get married...
There is no way to predict how people born in the 70s-90s are going to be different from previous generations when they hit retirement.
This is heading off topic. House cleaning is not a legitimate reason for not being able to work toward being in the best physical health you can be in.
you raise good points -- there are changes, for sure.
(i bet though that if you asked your friends to *count the time* they spend doing these things, it'd still fall close to traditional norms.)
housework is imo totally not off-topic, it gets to the heart of why people are pissed off about it.0 -
This is heading off topic. House cleaning is not a legitimate reason for not being able to work toward being in the best physical health you can be in.
I am a 30 yr old wife and mother of 2 (10 and 2). I work full time and take classes,I cook, grocery shop, I clean, I do laundry, I help with homework, I watch movies with my kiddos, go to the park, all of their events and my husbands, I travel, watch a little tv etc etc and the list goes on.... (I'm even a neat freak)
BUT,
I make time for my health and bust my *kitten* in the gym-I also eat healthier and make sure my family does as well. I also Wake up and hr earlier and go to bed an hour later and still have energy to burn.
As I said before, we are our own excuses!0 -
whether or not you grew up in a society that does this to women (re: cleanliness obligations) depends on how old you are, what country you were raised in, what generation your mother was part of, if you had both parents or just one and whether you had a stay at home mom or dad or if they both worked.
your sociology stuff is backdated and cant be handed out like that anymore.
We have unlimited options now and nothing is traditional or standard anymore. You cant make sweeping generalizations across the female half of the species.
You can tell us all about you and your situation and no one can say boo in disagreement. but what things were like for you were probably not the same way for women across the board anymore :flowerforyou:
it's not backdated actually, some of these studies are from the past five years, in north america, with women who were reproductive aged in that time frame. i know everyone would like for this crap to be over but it's not
-snip-
its also not the same. It may not be over - but we arent where we were in the beginning. we have made progress. i cant believe im still having to explain to women that not only have we indeed made progress, but that its okay to celebrate that. we dont have to end every freaking fudging sentence with a ....BUT WE'RE STILL ON THE SHT END OF THE STICK.
As individuals, we are not. As individuals, we are now free.
Free to exercise our butts off in tiny workout clothes in front of our kids and stand up to the naysayers and say oh yeah? what's your excuse for not being awesome, when we finally have the right to be.
I'm definitely glad I'm living today and not in my grandmother's time, that's for sure!
Things are improving, but........... I don't feel like it's a good idea to just chill out about it (backlash, anyone? how cool is it to say you're a feminist these days?)
there it is again.
that BUT at the end of every positive sentence, making sure we dont forget that we are still on the bottom.
we arent.
the only women who are domestically oppressed and lagging behind the curve are the ones who are choosing to stay in that era and be martyrs - or those who are working on a plan to get out.0 -
Wait.....so I can stop helping around the house and she won't do anything about it?
I've been doing this all wrong.
dude... you help?0 -
whether or not you grew up in a society that does this to women (re: cleanliness obligations) depends on how old you are, what country you were raised in, what generation your mother was part of, if you had both parents or just one and whether you had a stay at home mom or dad or if they both worked.
your sociology stuff is backdated and cant be handed out like that anymore.
We have unlimited options now and nothing is traditional or standard anymore. You cant make sweeping generalizations across the female half of the species.
You can tell us all about you and your situation and no one can say boo in disagreement. but what things were like for you were probably not the same way for women across the board anymore :flowerforyou:
it's not backdated actually, some of these studies are from the past five years, in north america, with women who were reproductive aged in that time frame. i know everyone would like for this crap to be over but it's not
-snip-
its also not the same. It may not be over - but we arent where we were in the beginning. we have made progress. i cant believe im still having to explain to women that not only have we indeed made progress, but that its okay to celebrate that. we dont have to end every freaking fudging sentence with a ....BUT WE'RE STILL ON THE SHT END OF THE STICK.
As individuals, we are not. As individuals, we are now free.
Free to exercise our butts off in tiny workout clothes in front of our kids and stand up to the naysayers and say oh yeah? what's your excuse for not being awesome, when we finally have the right to be.
I'm definitely glad I'm living today and not in my grandmother's time, that's for sure!
Things are improving, but........... I don't feel like it's a good idea to just chill out about it (backlash, anyone? how cool is it to say you're a feminist these days?)
there it is again.
that BUT at the end of every positive sentence, making sure we dont forget that we are still on the bottom.
we arent.
the only women who are domestically oppressed and lagging behind the curve are the ones who are choosing to stay in that era and be martyrs - or those who are working on a plan to get out.
i invite you to look at the cross national data again...0 -
I do not see why anyone wouldnt want to look like her.
Because many of us like looking like ourselves.0 -
Stop whining and make me a sammich.
0 -
:-)I do not see why anyone wouldnt want to look like her.
Because many of us like looking like ourselves.
She is beautiful but even if I WANTED to look like her, I couldn't. I have moe natural curves and I like them. I want to be as thin as she is, but I want my hips and waist.0 -
This is heading off topic. House cleaning is not a legitimate reason for not being able to work toward being in the best physical health you can be in.
I am a 30 yr old wife and mother of 2 (10 and 2). I work full time and take classes,I cook, grocery shop, I clean, I do laundry, I help with homework, I watch movies with my kiddos, go to the park, all of their events and my husbands, I travel, watch a little tv etc etc and the list goes on.... (I'm even a neat freak)
BUT,
I make time for my health and bust my *kitten* in the gym-I also eat healthier and make sure my family does as well. I also Wake up and hr earlier and go to bed an hour later and still have energy to burn.
As I said before, we are our own excuses!
jealous of your butt and hammies.0 -
whether or not you grew up in a society that does this to women (re: cleanliness obligations) depends on how old you are, what country you were raised in, what generation your mother was part of, if you had both parents or just one and whether you had a stay at home mom or dad or if they both worked.
your sociology stuff is backdated and cant be handed out like that anymore.
We have unlimited options now and nothing is traditional or standard anymore. You cant make sweeping generalizations across the female half of the species.
You can tell us all about you and your situation and no one can say boo in disagreement. but what things were like for you were probably not the same way for women across the board anymore :flowerforyou:
it's not backdated actually, some of these studies are from the past five years, in north america, with women who were reproductive aged in that time frame. i know everyone would like for this crap to be over but it's not
-snip-
its also not the same. It may not be over - but we arent where we were in the beginning. we have made progress. i cant believe im still having to explain to women that not only have we indeed made progress, but that its okay to celebrate that. we dont have to end every freaking fudging sentence with a ....BUT WE'RE STILL ON THE SHT END OF THE STICK.
As individuals, we are not. As individuals, we are now free.
Free to exercise our butts off in tiny workout clothes in front of our kids and stand up to the naysayers and say oh yeah? what's your excuse for not being awesome, when we finally have the right to be.
I'm definitely glad I'm living today and not in my grandmother's time, that's for sure!
Things are improving, but........... I don't feel like it's a good idea to just chill out about it (backlash, anyone? how cool is it to say you're a feminist these days?)
there it is again.
that BUT at the end of every positive sentence, making sure we dont forget that we are still on the bottom.
we arent.
the only women who are domestically oppressed and lagging behind the curve are the ones who are choosing to stay in that era and be martyrs - or those who are working on a plan to get out.
i invite you to look at the cross national data again...
I dont want to because you cant seem to admit any kind of female progress without adding a BUT.
I also dont want to because I believe in individuals, not the most common denominators put in place to genericize us.0 -
So this thread went from, waaaa, fattie shaming, to... you can't admit female progress!
Love MFP.
LULZ Interwebz, u funny.0 -
Stop whining and make me a sammich.
I Love this ^^^^
Sense of humor shows from a Lady - makes me want to get to know her better.0 -
:-)I do not see why anyone wouldnt want to look like her.
Because many of us like looking like ourselves.
She is beautiful but even if I WANTED to look like her, I couldn't. I have moe natural curves and I like them. I want to be as thin as she is, but I want my hips and waist.
I meant a similar level of fitness, or bodyfat percentage rather.0 -
Gotcha.
:-)I do not see why anyone wouldnt want to look like her.
Because many of us like looking like ourselves.
She is beautiful but even if I WANTED to look like her, I couldn't. I have moe natural curves and I like them. I want to be as thin as she is, but I want my hips and waist.
I meant a similar level of fitness, or bodyfat percentage rather.
But even that is individual. Some women DON'T want to be at that fitness level/BFP.0 -
It shouldn't be controversial at all. She should be proud of her accomplishment, and if she wants to flaunt it why should it matter? She made the post for her social media followers.
Fair? Absolutely it's fair! She made the time to bust (fine) *kitten* and look great! Her detractors (specifically, the ones making "fat shaming" claims) used that same time to scarf deep dish on the couch while watching "The Biggest Loser". Instead of even doing a nice after dinner walk, much less some weights they want to now complain that their feelings are hurt?
As for shame? Shame isn't always bad. Feeling shame was a primary motivator for me to get back into shape. I'm GLAD that I felt mortified when I looked in the mirror. It was a major factor in getting me off my rear and ultimately made for a great summer of working out, and feeling better about myself.
Obesity is an epidemic in America, and if "shame" helps lower weight related disease, then I'm all for it.0 -
Also, I am a single guy that even in a relationship will do most of the cooking and cleaning. Because I enjoy and am great at cooking and I like my house to be a certain way. The only thing I would willingly give up is laundry.0
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