Doing this in secret?

I didn't go out of my way to keep it a secret, but I didn't really talk about it, either. I didn't want the people around me to feel free to give me tips, or comment on what I ate, how I exercised, or anything else.

I've gone back and forth through out my life on "hiding it". Right now, a friend at work is working out (excessively to me) and it's actually causing me to NOT want to workout myself. She has asked me to come along a few times and I always find a good excuse. I guess I'm just embarassed. And I really don't have much time to workout. But mostly I'm just intimidated and embarassed that I can't get as excited as she gets about exercising. So I don't discuss it much with her right now. I discuss it sparingly with another girl and read and try to motivate myself on here.

Your partner is about as supportive as my partner. He's been snotty in a similar way several times before. So I allow the waterworks to come on because it makes him uncomfortable, much how his comments have made me feel. So, knowing what it's like to be in love with someone that isn't always nice about your efforts hits very close to home. Just try to remember that what they say doesn't define you and it isn't the majority of what they mean to you. And DON'T let it derail you. My partner has often tried to say he is attempting to "motivate me". But it derails me pretty much every time. And food is far more comforting than the nasty thing he just said.

What you have is 1 scale victory (10 lbs!) and 2 non-scale victories. Be proud of yourself and keep working on improving. And honestly, the point is to be healthier. Who cares if you lose weight or not as long as you are becoming healthier, building muscle and taking care of YOU!

I agree with brandolin. It really sounds like your wife & you should look into some counseling. Maybe she feels a little envious that you're losing weight & she isn't? Maybe you should try to include her in your journey. Try to change your healthier lifestyle together. I haven't told anyone that I'm using mfp. Only my fiance knows & he completely supports & motivates me. Except for the few times where he tries to force feed me a bite of his Little Caesar's pizza. Besides him knowing, I log in secret. Idk why I'm embarrassed but I am. Maybe because the few times I actually mention healthier eating or working out, people will roll their eyes. I ordered a sandwich from subway with no cheese & a friend laughed at me saying " who doesn't put cheese on their sandwiches??" I actually love cheese but I was saving my cals for a big dinner & dessert that night.
Anyways, I don't need people to criticize my food choices or tell me I don't need to work out. If people notice that I'm getting more toned or looking better, then great. But I'm not going to advertise to everyone what I'm doing.

I don't think I'll keep my exercising a secret. If I'm obese and need to lose weight, why would I hide the fact I'm working towards loosing the weight a secret? Seems odd to me. Just the other day I told my friend I was getting ready for a workout and he gave me a compliment.

I keep my exercising a secret from my friend because I'm not at her level and am embarassed. I keep my exercising secret from my boyfriend because I worry he will make some comment about how I'm not working out hard enough (because he has WITHOUT seeing how I was working out) Last May I was doing Zombies, Run on a regular basis and I felt really good about myself, but it worked best when I didn't discuss it with anyone or try to have a workout buddy. I just went and did it.

I'm having a little trouble getting back on the band wagon with exercising, but my counting has been going pretty well recently,

Why yes and I have ways of hiding it as well, such as...

When on MFP I am sure to always have porn open in another tab, so I can quickly switch to it as to not embarrass myself by being seen a fitness site.

If anyone see's me lifting weights I just let them know I am double checking that gravity still works.

Whenever doing cardio I am sure to wear a balaclava and carry a sack with a $ sign on it so I look like I am running from the scene of a robbery.

If people notice that I weigh or pay attention to my food portions I quickly explain the sad details of my OCD condition then quickly flip the light switch twelve times whilst reciting the alphabet backwards.

Short answer: No but I don't advertise it either unless people have a genuine interest.

:laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:

Yes! Luckily I live with my friends and they don't notice if I eat or not. I think that now that I'm down 10 pounds one of them might have noticed a difference (since I only have 30 to lose total) but for the most part i'm the only one that has seen any changes.

My friends do try and sabotage my loss so I'm just not telling them and hopefully one day they'll just see it and be jealous :-)

I didn't have to tell anyone, because my girlfriend, at the time, managed to get the word out to the whole world.

Haha. An example of the kind of person you shouldn't tell.

I am doing this kind of in secret but I have a good reason, I'm looking to shock my family and friends at how much weight I'm going to lose by the next time I see them! I'm always shunned out because I'm the big girl in the family I want to show them I'm something way more then that! I wanna prove everyone wrong who says I'll never change.

You are trying to get fit and are keeping that a secret?

There aren't enough gif's in the internet to express the amount of lol's that produces.

Getting fit takes time. You have to exercise one way or another to be fit. Are you sneaking one in at lunch time, going for midninght rendezvous with your short-shorts while she sleeps, secret dates with the kettle bells?

C'mon, you can't keep real fitness secret - it's a major lifestyle change. Dela with it, have an open discussion (and there are probably other issues going on if you can't). Discussions around "too much protein," "bad food", etc. can be had and myths dispelled in a calm way.

You don't need to annouce it on the roof-tops but real partners are in it for the journey one way or another or collateral damage.

Hey, that's what we have MFP for! Everyone IRL can just compliment us as they notice progress!

secret progress?

Dieting and weight loss is an odd topic in the general American population. If you're largely overweight, and your doing a soup diet, or a cleanse, or a lemon water diet, it's ok to discuss and people will be supportive and say how they lost 12 lbs on that diet when they did it. So, it's ok for that.

However, if you say, "I track my calories making sure to eat at a small deficit so I lose about 1 lb per week, and I also exercise about 4 or 5 days a week.", everyone looks at you like you're a space alien.

I don't know why this is. It's just the oddest thing though.

But, yes. I just keep my trap shut.

This exactly!

My husband knows and is my biggest supporter - I can't imagine doing it without him knowing.
But i haven't told anyone else.
I find friends fall into 2 camps - they either say, it's too hard, you will never do it, there is nothing wrong with your weight, etc. or they try to sabotage the whole thing by turning up on my doorstep with cream cakes, or telling me a glass or two of wine won't make any difference.

Don't get me wrong, I do have good friends, but I think the whole 'diet' thing is tricky. No one seems totally comfortable just coming out and saying; 'you really are overweight, it's good you are working on that, how can I help?'

I've told no one, but my boyfriend's noticed that I'm smaller and my butt's lifted from my refound love of squats :laugh: I only see him once a week or so, hence him noticing.. I don't really plan on telling anyone, but I'm going to my parents' house for Christmas and I've somehow got to explain 5:2 to them (yes I know I could just take a break but I don't want to) without it seeming like I'm nuts

You are trying to get fit and are keeping that a secret?

There aren't enough gif's in the internet to express the amount of lol's that produces.

Getting fit takes time. You have to exercise one way or another to be fit. Are you sneaking one in at lunch time, going for midninght rendezvous with your short-shorts while she sleeps, secret dates with the kettle bells?

C'mon, you can't keep real fitness secret - it's a major lifestyle change. Dela with it, have an open discussion (and there are probably other issues going on if you can't). Discussions around "too much protein," "bad food", etc. can be had and myths dispelled in a calm way.

You don't need to annouce it on the roof-tops but real partners are in it for the journey one way or another or collateral damage.

Well, if you go on his profile, (I know, work....) he states that he IS an active guy by nature but it is his eating habits that need tweaking. He describes himself as one who can't out-exercise what he eats....or something like that.

That's even better.

Look honey, a gint pink elephant.
>Hides dinner plate while wife looks away<

Secret eating habits.

Did you just weigh that donut, dear?
No honey, I placed it on the scale while I was getting some fine burgundy in this useful measuring cup. Would you like 1.3 ounces or 1.8?

Honey, that's not a big *kitten* container of whey protein, it's ah.... ah.... food for my tropical fish. What? Oh, yeah... the fish, I'm going out ot buy now.

All the secret exercisers, and the secret eaters are in secret ....

That's a shame she can't be more supportive but good for you for putting it out there. Lots of folks have the same problem. My mother always feels the need to do the same thing... can't ever just say I look nice, its always "how much weight have you lost..." and then she starts on her weight loss "plans." Keep at it... do it yourself and feel great about it. I went down 12 lbs then blew it and gained 7 back so statting over today. Only have 75 more to go...