Parenthood is it worth it?

Smart *kitten*-ery aside, ;0) I'm a mom of 4 but I started young and gave up my freedom by 25. I do love my kids, but not sure I'd do that again. My husband and I only had a very few short years before our relationship went from being all about us to all about them. I think that was really the hardest part.

I *adored* my babies as babies. I was a great baby mom. Toddlers and preschoolers were tough for me because I'm not the most patient person in the world and human beings that are obstinate and unreasonable 95% of their waking hours are difficult to manage for impatient people. Now that everyone can speak in full sentences and control their bodily functions (ages 8 to 14), we get along pretty well. Although I maintain that sibling bickering is the definition of hell and I probably would have been a bang up mom if I'd stopped at one.

The sleep deprivation sucks balls but holidays are a lot more fun. Traveling will blow for a decade. I'd advise you to skip it all together and save your money for a friggin' FANTASTIC vacation when the kid turns 10 or 12. The toys are fun. Your photography will improve (because kids inherently look cute in pictures) until they hit the awkward tween stage. Go to the grocery store ALONE, even if that means you go at 1 a.m. Don't stop having sex, even if it's just quickies for the next four years. Don't buy goldfish because those g*da*n things are addictive and have 100,000 calories per handful.

I think that's it. Enjoy.

I didn't become a father (at least that I know of.....) until I was almost 40, despite the grey hairs & wrinkles caused by my kids I wouldn't change a thing.

My son turned 18 this year & my daughter will be 16 tomorrow. Watching them go from being helpless little blobs of humanity to funny, bright, articulate (sometimes too articulate), caring human beings has been the greatest adventure of my life.

We are struggling with whether to have a third (currently have 18-month-old twins), and the problem with this decision is that you can't make it logically. There is a long, long "con" list, mostly involving freedom and money and convenience, and only two things on the "pro" side:

1) Less chance you'll end up alone and neglected as an old person

2) A completely intangible thing that you cannot put into words, cannot explain to non-parents, cannot even really explain to yourself. It's totally different than anything else in my life and it's so good that it can make you consider having more even when both of your 18-month-olds are crying and you desperately need sleep and someone just pooped AGAIN. All that stuff passes. But this love, man - it's forever. And it's bigger than anything you ever imagined.

(Edited to add: I do not think everyone should have children. It's great if you're with the right person or just want children and have the love and resources to spare. I'd never tell someone that they SHOULD have children - and don't believe you need them to be happy or fulfilled - but if you're on the fence because of all those practical cons - I do say go for it.)

I'll never have children because I don't want to give up the life of a non-parent. I decided this when I was a teen and have stuck to it.

ditto. my mom actually says that while she wouldn't trade my brother or i for anything, she really wishes she didn't cave to the pressure to have kids.

Me too! My husband and I might think about it later (we're only 26 and 27 right now and wouldn't even consider it until early to mid 30's), but for right now, I can't imagine it. School, work, moving around (military). I'll stick to animals for now and just babysit my nieces and nephews! I used to get the pressure until my they came along. Now I can just spoil!

DD: "I love you Mommy."
Me: "I love you MORE".
DD: "No, I love you more."
Me: "Sweetie, you can't imagine just how much Mommy loves you until you have a baby of your own."

So worth it!

Not for me, I have never had the desire to be a mom.

Getting to leave on a trip on the spur of the moment, having extra cash, not having the responsibility, the list goes on...I enjoy my life so much the way it is I cannot imagine being tied down.

We have two a 20 year old girl and a 23 year old boy they have and continue to enrich our lives. Teaching both my children how to ride bikes, throw, fish, camp you name it we have probably done it TOGETHER.

Did it put a damper on things, did we feel like we gave up going places at a drop of a dime at times, sure but that comes with the responsibility of having children. The question should be did we feel deprived by not being able to do certain things that single folks don't give a second thought about...Well let me put it to you this way, when your daughter takes your face with both of her little hands and looks at you and says' " I love you Daddy" well that's more than enough for me.

I am 32 and just had my first. She will be five months on Monday and I still look at her in awe and can't quite believe my husband and I made this beautiful little person. The best part is when they smile at you for the first time and I don't mean those first reflex smiles! I mean when their face light up multiple times a day just at the sight of you. There are tough times and leaving the house will hold a new meaning for you but it is definitely worth it. And I agree with one of the other posters as soon as the doctor gives you the go ahead squeeze sex in whenever you can your relationship is also important even if your focus as shifted a bit from him to your baby!!

Yep I miss my freedom. And flexible funds. And sanity.

But the pros? Looking at this person that YOU made. Seeing your attributes and those of your partners. Regailing their accomplishments because it's something YOU taught them. Knowing that how you raise and teach them directly affects how they turned out as a person. It's a lot of stress and a heavy load, but it's more than worth it. That child will love you unconditionally and you will know more love for that 1 little person than you ever imagined possible.

As a parent you will lose sleep. Lose money. Realize how little patience you really have. Learn that a little dirt really doesn't hurt. Realize that a messy house is okay because you're just too tired to clean up. Gain an amazing acceptance of puke, poop, and disgusting noises. Have converstations that consist completely of the smell, color, and consistancy of poop. Learn that the terms "Containment breech" and "complete blowout" mean the same thing.

Yes...it's absolutely worth it.

My kid made me grow up and changed my life for the better. He has a disability and it's very hard at times but I wouldn't change it for the world. Yes it is so worth it!